By | August 20, 2012 326 Comments

How to get revenge against the sociopath

You’ve finally figured out what is wrong with an individual who has taken advantage of you, abused you, perhaps even assaulted you. Reading Lovefraud, you realize that he or she is a sociopath.

Now, you’re an emotional wreck.  You’ve been profoundly betrayed. You’re justifiably angry. Plus, the sociopath has caused you real problems. Perhaps all your money is gone. Or you’re in a vicious child custody battle. You’ve lost your job, your savings or your home. You suffer from anxiety, depression or PTSD.  You feel so far down that you don’t even know which direction is up.

You are outraged by the sociopath’s actions. You are further outraged that after this individual bulldozed through your life, he or she seems to be facing absolutely no consequences. The predator has simply moved on to a new target, leaving you in a heap of ashes.

You want your life back. You want to sociopath to be accountable for the destruction he or she caused.  And you want to make sure he or she never does this to another human being. But the predator turns on the charm, or plays the victim, or convinces everyone that you are mentally unstable. No one seems to be able to help you. In fact, no one even understands what you’re talking about.

It’s infuriating. If you were honest with yourself, you’d have to admit that you really want revenge.

“Living well is the best revenge”

This proverb was recorded by the English poet George Herbert in 1651. Perhaps whoever originally said it hundreds of years ago knew about sociopaths.

Right now, with your life in tatters, you probably feel like “living well” is an impossible dream. But you can start working towards that goal immediately—and stick it to the sociopath in the process.

The sociopath’s prime objective in life is power and control. If you deny the sociopath power and control over you, you take away what he or she wants most.

The power and control that the sociopath exerts is primarily over your thoughts and emotions. You can break that power and control, and it doesn’t even have to cost you any money. The first step, of course, is No Contact. We talk about No Contact all the time on Lovefraud, but if you need a refresher course on how to do it, read:

How to implement No Contact

It’s true that No Contact is difficult in many cases, such as if you share children with the sociopath, or you work together. In these situations, you need to get to Emotional No Contact. That means you detach emotionally; you do not allow him or her to upset you. There are caveats to this as well, because sociopaths are capable of atrocious behavior that really pushes your buttons. In these cases, you certainly deserve to be upset—just don’t let the sociopath see it.

Remember, they want power and control. If they see that they have triggered you, they know that they still have power and control over you.

The key, therefore, is to focus on healing yourself and improving your life. It will take time. It will require processing the pain, disappointment and anger of the betrayal. But if you decide to recover, you can do it. For more on this, read:

After the sociopath, make the decision to recover

This does not mean that the sociopath should get away with what happened. But if you want to hold the sociopath accountable, you need to do it from a position of strength. Working on your own recovery is the best way to develop the strength.

“Revenge is a dish best served cold”

The source of this statement is also unclear—it was first translated from French to English in 1846, but apparently was already a proverb by then.

It’s not a good idea to consciously go out to seek revenge.  (Another proverb attributed to the Chinese philosopher Confucius states, “Before you embark on a journey of revenge, dig two graves.”) But as time goes by and you build your inner strength, you may suddenly find yourself faced with an opportunity to hold the sociopath accountable.

The sociopath, of course, will continue a life of destruction. Eventually, he or she may target the wrong person or seriously break the law, and someone may contact you to find out what you know about this disordered individual. Then, in a calm and collected manner, you can describe your experience, provide evidence that proves a pattern of behavior, and contribute to some type of justice—whether it’s getting the individual prosecuted, exposed in the media, or just ruining his or her efforts with yet another potential victim.

Revenge may be possible, but probably not right away. So focus on your first priority, which is healing your own life. Then, be patient. By releasing the pain and upset of your betrayal, you’ll be ready when an opportunity arrives for justice.

To you, justice will be sweet revenge.

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I am beginning to see that getting on with my life ……and ignoring him is the best weapon against him. He hates to be ignored. He also hates that I have walked away without a thought for him. Well, No Contact has him believing I do not care one iota. The reality is a little different but I can get over that, in time.

I especially liked the quote from Confucius

“Before you embark on a journey of revenge, dig two graves.”
Hatred and bitterness and thoughts of revenge can surely destroy a person. I already experienced a window into the dark side when I was with the spath. Not a place I want to revisit.

Romans 12:19 (King James Version)
Dearly beloved, avenge not yourselves, but rather give place unto wrath: for it is written, Vengeance is mine; I will repay, saith the Lord.

Is this the Bible’s way of saying what goes around comes around?


Thank you Donna for validating me this morning. xxoo
Oh yes, definitely: the only way to go with a psychopath.
NO CONTACT. It took me like six times before I finally got it right. I mean, everyone should be willing and able to just ‘work things out’, right? Not so with a spath/ppath. They DELIGHT in drama and chaos. The revenge is in NO CONTACT. Just flick them off your shoulder like pigeon poop. Give them their due. There is no ‘working things out’ with a spath/ppath, only more opportunities for them to get close enough to physically and emotionally and psychologically harm you!!!!! No more!

I just spent the past four days, trying to figure out “WHY” this stalker just continues on and on…I have not spoken a peep to it since April and yet, the stalking still continues.

Oh yes, hate, bitterness and thoughts of revenge CAN completely eat a person up but it’s not happening in MY situation. Closed door: SLAM! No further contact. Our association is OVER as we knew it.

It took me a while to get over the feelings but I am starting to toughen up now and I really don’t give a rats behind WHAT he does, where he goes, what happens to him. He never gave a rats behind what he did to me. In fact, he laughed about it and found it quite amusing, all the dastardly things he has done.

Well, the joke is on him.
HE is the one with the loser life.
The empty life. And, nobody he ends up with now or in the future is going to be any different than it already has been in all of his relationships because he is INCAPABLE of feeling.

Yes, strongawoman:

Romans 12:19 (King James Version):

“Dearly beloved, avenge not yourselves, but rather give place
unto wrath: for it is written, vengeance is mine; I will repay,
saith the Lord.”

Exactly. What comes around goes around.
In some way or another they shall reap what they sow.
Never forget that. Even if we can’t SEE it or WITNESS it,
I absolutely BELIEVE, with my entire being, KARMA does and WILL justify us. Absolutely.

I see karma at work as I write, in the things that has happened to “ITS” life. Webs, lies, deceptions…kind of difficult to keep them all straight, when you tell so many….hmm…the new ‘victims’ will be bamboozled for a little while, only until they have “IT” figured out. True, they can keep the facade going for years at a time, however, the mask DOES eventually melt and slip off their face. FOR EVERYONE.

I am doing alright. Four days of non stop peace and quiet.
Wonder when the next intrusion will present itself. Hm?
I stand firm and strong on my decision to not let this in my life any longer. Not even LEGAL ATTENTION is he going to get.
Because “I” know that is exactly what “IT” wants: more attention. It doesn’t matter if it’s good or bad; remember?
As long as they are getting your attention.

Yes: they absolutely HATE being ignored.
ABSOLUTELY, considering they like to be the center of the drama and attention.
I figured that out; it took a while, but that is the best revenge: living your life well.

Love to you all this Monday,



I was fortunate in that I was actually able to seek justice against the one I was involved with by turning him into the army for fraud and adultery. He was investigated, found guilty, and punished in some way that I was not informed of. The entire process took about a year, and unfortunately, during that year, he was still in my thoughts because of the long drawn-out process. I’m so glad I did it because our taxes were paying his wages, and this is completely unfair. I did it more for justice than personal revenge, because I just wanted nothing more than for him to exit my life and leave me alone.

In spite of the added bonus of exposing him to the army, the best revenge for me was when I moved on with my life to the point where I no longer hated him. I stopped caring one way or the other. He just became “someone that I used to know” to quote that Gauthier song. I could care less about him these days.


Yay! For Star!!!

I am at just about the same place now.
“Someone that I used to know…”

That’s it too.
Congrats on getting some justification.
I am still waiting on mine, legally…it will come, sooner or later.


*Edit: If my ‘justification’ doesn’t come in a legal way, I already have some justification in the fact that “IT” is no longer a part of my world. The day that “I” convince MYSELF that all this was a ‘figment of my imagination’ is the day I will be successful in my goal of forgetting it, moving on and completely healing. When “IT” is no longer a focal point of my attentions, be those attentions INFLICTED or otherwise.


Dupey, I love that video soooooooooooooo much! I know Gotye wrote it as an amalgam of experiences and isn’t intended as a spath song… BUT that video captures so well how the one who now ignores him heals… she’s alive and separated from the background, whereas he becomes and stays part of the background.


darwinsmom: oh yes, excellent song.
I like the part: “…all the times you screwed me over…”

Goyte has an exceptionally LARGE mouth; doesn’t he?
Like someone else I used to know. Scary. No offense Goyte.




I love your story about backspathing your spath. I remember I think ERIN BROCK also had a great backspathing story. And of course, our very own DONNA did too.

I think the challenge here honestly is NO CONTACT EVER AGAIN. I think it’s one thing to honestly try to prevent contact (try not to see him on the street, try to block the text messages, try to block the emails)……and it’s another thing to BLOCK HIM OUT OF YOUR HEAD AND HEART.

Focusing on the latter is much more difficult. I mean, we’re all here today because the spath is taking up room in our heads, is he not?

I keep working hard on this. I realized I am working hard at getting the spath out of my head, but I am working even harder at forgiving myself for my repeated hopefulness and my repeated faith in his ability to change. LOL!

NO CONTACT EVER AGAIN is more about ME LIVING WITH MY OWN INTEGRITY. I am not going to blame myself any more, I am not playing the victim any more, I am not shaming myself any more for allowing this snake into my life. It happened. So what. Time to move on.



Yeah, dupey, I don’t know if you ever read the whole story of my backspath, but parts of it were quite hilarious. The spath was so stupid that it was he who hung himself. The entire story is on the “Dumb Sociopaths” thread (or some title like that. The ironic thing is, I originally did not want to turn him in. I just wanted him off my internet forum and out of my life. I told him if I so much as saw him on the forum again, I’d turn him in for adultery. So he could have walked off scott free with a nice pension from the army for a medical condition he was faking. I didn’t even know he was faking a medical condition until the commander told me they suspected it. But they had no witnesses who’d seen him behaving normally without the medical condition (that’s where me and my friends came in). So he would have gotten away with it. Instead, he called my bluff and posted on the forum the next day. And to boot, it was a picture of him with his wedding ring on (he’d told me he just got divorced). So he really cooked his own goose. I called his commander and told him about the adultery. Turned out I was the key witness that got him on fraud AND adultery. My friends and me. There were about 5 of us all together who gave sworn statements. That was the nail in his coffin. Apparently, he’d been faking the condition for 2 years (!) complete with a fake limp, phony facial tics, and claiming no feeling from the waste down. When he tried to tell the army that my friends and I were lying, lo and behold! I’d taken all kinds of pictures of him doing things that a disabled person would not be able to do. When he tried to lie about our relationship and say we were just friends, well what do you know…..I just HAPPENED to save his 25 voice messages on my voice mail telling me how “special last night was” and how much he was in love with me. ha ha ha. What a dumbshit he was.

(It’s so much fun recounting the backspath. LOL)



eventually you can put them out of your heart and mind… All the ex-spath is to me now is an example to compare with other examples. It’s just that psychopathy and sociopathy have become such an integral and important subject for me, and this community is the sole one I can discuss present events, impressions and opinions and things I learn with.

No matter how supportive my friends and my family are… They are not so thoroughly interested in it as I am. They are interested but not on a daily basis. My mom took 10 red flags of Lovefraud out of my library just before I moved 2 weeks ago and is reading it of her own volition. Noticed it was gone and discovered it at my parents. She was also the one who tipped me off on an interview article with Hare in a Belgian weekly magazine Humo and cut out my reader letter. My best male friend is interested too and uses some of the info he got with regards his boundaries while he’s dating all over the place with other men he meets on the internet. I can see that it has become a subject for the people around me, but not as much as myself.

And I want to help people who are going through the stages we all have to go through at our own pace. You are my sisters and brothers. You all experienced that same part of humanity you wouldn’t wish on anyone sentient.


Speaking of back-spathing: I have saved every single death threat that he has left on my answering machine and by text and email. I have saved every single stalking and harassment that the assorted ‘minions’ have left on my answering machine. They have been turned over to the prosecutor’s office and have been there for the past two years, since the first death threat. I could never serve a restraining order in the allotted 21 day time frame, being he is homeless and living off internet women, with no address, so the local law enforcement has taken up my ’cause’ all on their own. They are only a phone call away from me. ONE MINUTE and I have been repeatedly told that if I EVER need them, just call and they will be happy to respond and “IT” knows it. He has met them all before.

The authorities around me know he has tried to murder me before.
They are NOT very happy with him either.
Nobody but his ‘minions’ are happy with him and that’s only because they are being DUPED.

If that’s not back-spathing, I don’t know what is.
I bet, long about now, he is really truly very sorry he ever got
himself involved with me…..

Let’s see how long this lasts, where it’s SOMEWHAT quiet…



Ah coincidences!

The past few days I have been humming that song…”Someone that I used to know”. Just, I think…a inner realization that that is it….that’s all he is now….as I have been just moving on without realizing that I am.

A month or so it was….”to see him never would be too soon”…yeah, now, pigeon poop. Whatever.

Movement, I believe, has been in that I’ve taken some time – in this awful heat…to rest in the shade and read. (Soothing for me – and a good sign that my stress is lowering).

I thoroughly enjoyed “This is How” by Augusten Burroughs (Running with Scissors author). Perhaps because we are of an age…and the things he wrote of are lessons I surely hope I’ve learned by now….apparently not, because I got a lot out of his book.

And – Steve Harvey – his two books….”Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man”…and I’m in the middle of “Straight Talk, No Chaser”. Besides enjoying his humour on Family Feud – I’d seen him on “Anderson”.

Originally, I’d ordered Harvey’s books from the library in that eternal (it seems) search to find out why I have such a poor “pecker picker” (sorry, no offense intended)….and he covers boundaries and values and self worth….it just ‘caught’ me and made sense. He is very clear on ‘red flags’ as we know them…and he doesn’t negotiate.
Profess, Provide and Protect……….so simple.


As to revenge on a spath. No, nope, never. Being clean – away from the slime…healthy – mind, body and soul…is so much more valuable to me. I believe…with some experience…that a spath will only be taken down by someone more powerful that has had enough of their games.

However, that said…I am not yet in a place of power(wellbeing) ..or feeling of power. Nor is the spath in my life anymore….easy for me to say. I hope that I would find that strength should my loved ones be threatened.



Donna, thank you for this timely article – as all of them are on this site.

At one point, I wanted to see the exspath in prison for his frauds. Today, I just want to get on with my life. My personal belief is that there is no amount of money or any punishment that would “fix” what the exspath did. Karma, perhaps, will come back around and pay him a visit, but I won’t be there to see it. I don’t care, anymore.

With the most recent female spath, she’s digging her own grave at 24 with a mountain of debt, and people realizing that she’s toxic (at the very least). She may, or may not, end up marrying my colleague, but whatever happens, I won’t be around to see karma visit her, either. I simply don’t care.

What I do care about is the well-being of my son and myself. I have some major changes coming up, and I am fighting fear-based paralysis on a daily basis. How did I find myself basically homeless and destitute? My own lack of boundaries and willingness to trust someone else are my faults. These are things that I will be working on for the rest of my life.

This is not to say that I don’t fantasize about spaths experiencing what they have truly earned, but “justice” is rarely delivered, and “revenge” would put me on the same level as the spaths. It’s best for me to just walk away.

I don’t feel as if I’m in a place of “power” or “control,” yet, either. One thing is certain: from this point on, I’m in the driver’s seat of my life, and I’m going to learn how to relish my personal freedom and responsibilities.

Brightest blessings


I was able to get my revenge which proved very therapeutic.

After I chucked him out he moved to a different part of the country. I kept getting letters from debt collection agencies for him, which at first I ignored. then I decided that I would speak to one of them. I rang them and told them that he had moved, but gave them his new address. I also gave them all the aliases I discovered he used. they said he’s really giving us the run around isn’t he and I laughed. I later heard that his house had been raided by the baliffs & the police & they took all his stuff (including my laptop which he took, and he and his new girlfriend were arrested.

he was furious and phoned a mutual friend calling me the bitch from hell etc etc etc. But I laughed. It felt good to feel that he’d finally suffered at my hands 🙂


The only problem I have with being patient and waiting until he digs his own grave or until my life has regained some semblance of the way it used to be and I’m once again happy and somewhat successful is that:

By the time that happens, because of time and NC, I will then (hopefully!) be indifferent to him so it won’t have the same impact as it would if it happened sooner rather than later. I want him to suffer as much as I’m suffering NOW!

I know I can’t–and won’t–do anything to speed up that process, his inevitable downfall, but it sure makes for good fantasy!


I watched a documentary about Ian Brady, The Moors murderer called ‘Endgames of a psychopath’ by channell 4 last night.
His ‘mental health advocate’ Jennifer was arrested for keeping a letter written by Brady addressed to the mother of one of Keith Bennet one his victims, to be read upon Brady’s death….anyway to cut a long twisted story short…Ian Brady continues to manipulate those around him at the age of 73!!
EVERYONE who came in contact with him comes away having been made a fool of…everyone including lawyers, judges, psychiatrists…He has a complete disdain of professionals in the area of mental health and accuse the Justice system of torturing him daily, and treats them with contempt if at all.
He used his mental health officer to effectively break the law by playing on her ethic of confidentiality etc. I felt sick after watching the programme and it reminded me of my ex…every interaction is another chance to exploit and dupe no matter who you are!
what I’m saying is there is no expectation within me for “accountability” from a psychopath….it’s like looking for water in a desert…we hallucinate, see an illusion in the distance of an oasis but as we get nearer we see it is nothing more than wishful thinking…
Ian Brady is being force fed through a tube to keep him alive, He is on hunger strike for years….it’s a dreadfully bleak ordeal with no one coming out the winner…He is what He is…a miserable wretch now being tortured by the prison system and STILL He holds onto the one shred of power…the knowledge of where the body of Keith Bennet, one of his victims is. Bennets mother waged a campaign for years trying to get the information. She died last week….Brady still cold bloodedly keeps the secret…and campaigns for his right to be moved to a Prison in Scotland that will respect his ‘right to die’
Surely at some stage we need to give this to God, hand it over and let it go. Brady is living in a very darkened state and I believe this will not change even in death. To expect accountability from a sociopath is to miss the entire point of their condition…no one can expect remorse or accountability from a sociopath! we can corner them, imprison them, torture them back….becoming what, becoming like them?


Amazing how reading all of these posts, seems you’ve literally met mine. I like how some refer to them as “IT”. This is the way they see humans, as a “project”, a non feeling being. They are void of “feelings”, & think we are weak & stupid, so why not get something out of it? Even if just amusement.
I sometimes give him credit for some feelings, a BIG mistake. He turns it into more power over me.
I live w/mine for now, I’ve talked it over w/my College age sons, & we agree it’s best not to change for now, financial reasons. But an emotional distance is Crucial, or he’ll move in for the kill.
I can’t help think of him as an un-evolved animal, viscious & scared, unable to be dealt with with any emotion. He just goes thru life scratching & biting for whatever he thinks he needs. Maybe that’s an insult to animals. My point is very non-human behavior, sometimes I think satanic? Is it just me?

FREED FROM MINNIE ME~~~Dearest Donna, I cannot “Thank you enough” I could write the book on the him, wow did I get wooed and he he did exactly what you said and studied me until he did the rush to the ALTAR~~Oh yes also I was his soulmate too…I was his everything…after he abandoned me as he did his 3 children who are all a walking wreck…sad for them but they are carrying his same traits~~I have done my work and cannot disclose most of it but as said Karma is there believe me..he holds no accountability for anything he has done and continues on with his patterns he is not chasing me through emails etc….he has others doing it and has another victim this time she had enough warnings as I did not so let her wallow in her own pity one day…as he has done the same thing the flowers…oh my wife is such a bad person..she did this and that, he even has the new company he is working for in Ohio CONVINCED oh boy are they in for a surprise as they have seen his tempers and behavior but they are gold seekers so they want him around to be the one who convinces people to buy their franchises as we know the psychopath makes the best salseman…there is more to come but, it has to run it course for now i can’t thank you enough for being my self again..happy, devoted, loving and above all regained trust my son and I have always been close..but the monster did his best to destroy that and my son is a very well adjusted his texts and lies from the monster he ignores but as me he knows now the truth and the facts and that his mother has finally accepted every woman will be his are so right they love drama as his entire family is filled with it…instead of walking in peace they can’t even get along for a Thanksgiving dinner…so may he wallow in his thoughs that he is perfect weathy and loved because they cannot love and true he was tortured as a child so he wants to torture others as he knows no different…but boy what an actor…if there was an academy award for Sociopath’s please award him..but knowing he has called the world and told them I was the bitch from hell…I am loving it…as he did that about his children to me…and his previous victims some who got away and some who still suffer..And i choose never to be like MINNIE ME~~~


I posted about him all over the internet – about his lying about having STDs and giving me herpes, being a womanizer, all of his tactics. I went to Orchestra Hall and hung signs in the women’s restroom stating that the Minnesota Orchestra’s principal flutist lies about having herpes and genital warts, and don’t go home with him after the concert tonight. I’ve spent the last 5 years making his life hell, warning women everywhere, making it harder for him to get laid via dating websites, and I’m not sorry, nor am I finished. Sure, my life was ruined, but now his is too, and that’s a good thing.



yeh I watched that docu re Ian Brady. What a vile individual….he refuses to communicate and so an advocate is employed for him!! WTF? ….is surely the response from most people who watched last night. He has been on hunger strike for 30 years, necessitating tube feeding to keep him alive. He is on hunger strike because he wants to be allowed to die and has even taken the hospital to court to get what he wants. As many of the psychs said last night, psychopathy is about power and control. He isn’t going to get his own way and so they keep “force” feeding him. Good. Hope it’s painful and drawn out


The best revenge I got on the last sociopath who entered my life was to warn each and every person he had ever contacted online and telling them of the fraud he has perpetrated on everyone. Not all of them believed me (and those were mostly men), but the women took heed of my warnings. And I also contacted every woman on his MyYearBook friends list and told them the same information. I had the pleasure of speaking personally to his next victim (which really pissed him off). I warned her about him but she gave him a chance anyway. She regretted it after a few weeks and kicked him out. He goes from town to town seeking out new women to take advantage of and gleans sympathy by claiming to have lost a wife and son in a motorcycle accident (which I found out AFTER I moved him in is a total lie).

If I could…I’d continue to warn women away not only for revenge…but to save one more woman from him.


Be careful! I am being sued for exposing my ex-SP.
He is suing me for $10 million & he is representing himself & so far, he is winning & I am losing even with an attorney.
In fact, I think the attorney I hired took me for a ride, as I am now out of a lot of $$$s, and all my motions were denied & I am back to square one! Now defending myself, as I cannot afford another attorney…
Best to just let them go & keep your fingers crossed that “what goes around, comes around.”
Though at this point in my life, I am thinking: not only does the law NOT protect the victim, but it is the bad guys that get ahead…


Wow – this certainly is a popular article. Thank you Donna! I have been waiting for this one for 20 months. Revenge is not ours except to live well. He is not worth it EXCEPT for YOUR success and well being.

I am a novice numerologist and studying this ancient discipline was one of the “saving” parts of my recovery last year. If we do the numbers on all of these turd nuggets above, I am sure we will find similar stories as I did for my psychopath.

I believe we are on a journey in this life. We can make different choices because we all have free will, but strangely, it appears we eventually circle back to our previous pathway in this life.

On Tuesday, I finally face my psychopath in court and sign the divorce papers. It’s over. Finally. What I have discovered about his deceit is horrifying. What I now realize now is that the gentle hand of God has moved me out of this evil ones future incarceration and suffering for his deceit. Apparently, I missed all of the cues the last decade, so I have experienced “divine” intervention. When the police come calling for my ex husband, I will be gone and the new girlfriend will be standing in the doorway with her mouth open in shock as they handcuff him and lead him away.

I am blessed. We all are blessed. I have dodged a bullet with the ending of this marriage and I will give thanks everyday moving forward. Revenge is the Lord’s! – Believe that and trust it. Let’s get out there and live the life we were ALL meant to live! Peace to all of you and blessings always!


This is a great article!

I totally understand the high need to expose him, to prevent him from continuing his game, to save if you can other women from becoming the next victim. But to do that you basically need to sacrifice the remainder of your life and your healing process. Basically your life remains intertwined with theirs, and you end up living yours through their fake one.

The best revenge imo, now that I am healed and learned so much is to come out stronger and have a happy life. The best revenge on a destructive spath is that in the end he’s only a blip in my past and all his destructive intentions for me went for nought!


Thank you so much for this article today, especially. I have been married to this type of man for more than a year. It took several times before i was able to establish no contact and i’m still having a hard time with it. However, about a month ago, he had his last violent outburst and i obtained a restraining order, he violated it the same day – I called the police and he was arrested, they let him out on $5000 PR. He still tried contacting me indirectly over the first two weeks but I stayed strong and ignored his efforts, until one day – he finally got to me. He claimed to miss me, love me and finally realized how sick he is and enrolled in services for abuse, anger management and therapy along with a psychiatrist. So, I accepted a phone call from him and we started texting, etc. The hearing for the RO was less than a week away. During that time, it started again – i got really upset and let him know exactly what I was thinking and feeling about all of this (by the way – due to the RO, he had no where to stay but the mens’ shelter) and he retaliated in the usual way only this time HE called the police on ME. He lied to the police and said that i was stalking him, blocking his vehicle and he didn’t want to get into trouble because of the RO. When the police arrived, i proved that we had been in contact for the last few days AND that we had been sitting there for hours talking before he called them. Needless to say, they arrested him and he’s been in jail. His hearing was postponed until today and his arraignment is in November. I haven’t heard anything from him d/t orders of the RO and he’s in prison. He hasn’t even tried to contact me indirectly again. But he is doing all the usual – telling people i got him arrested, telling everyone he’s the one suffering at the hand of a psycho, etc and alot of them believe him. AND i found out that during the time of him “courting” me back into his life, he had already started seeing someone else. Even after all of this, I still have a hard time with wanting him to really mean what he says, that he’ll get better and the abuse will stop – I’m at a really vulnerable point but I’m glad that there is now way for me to contact him or vice versa. I’m forced into have NO CONTACT. i see that as a blessing right now because deep down, i know he’ll never change and i will only keep getting more of the same. I’m waiting on the divorce papers and that will be the last time I absolutely MUST deal with him. Thank you for all of your posts and having this site. I’m sorry that we all had to experience and lose parts of our lives with these people. But, it’s definitely a learning lesson and makes us all that much stronger and wiser. AND I do believe Karma is at work, I don’t purposely seek out revenge, it’s not in my nature – but he sure does do everything possible to “avenge” himself and try to make my life even more miserable. However, it seems to me that I don’t have to exact revenge, his stupidity does it for me and most times that’s all we have to do.
Love, Peace and Happiness to all!


Defendant12 – I can sort of relate. I had 4 court cases against my ex-spath, all with no lawyer. I had 3 in small claims and one in family court. I had a child with him, a guy who wasn’t able to have kids and even went to a doctor to prove it to me…HA! I won in 2 of the small claims cases, to the tune of $47,800. I know I’ll never see a cent but just that fact that I have that over his head is enough. 😀 I have another trial next week and then a hearing concerning access in September.

It’s funny…in the last couple of months he managed to con Legal Aid into giving him a lawyer. he’s been working regularly since we split. I, on the other hand, haven’t had a full time job since last November and I had no lawyer and I’m the one trying to protect my child. On Thursday we were in court and he freaked out and refused to leave me alone…got thrown out of the courthouse 3 times and then the cops were called. He should have been arrested but he wasn’t. I’m not sure how he gets away with this shit! but because of his outburst and actions, his legal aid lawyer quit on him and I ended up getting one to act for me!! so he did me a huge favour by showing the entire court staff what a douche-bag he really is. 😀 he still texts me and threatens that his lawyer has tons of ‘shit’ to use against me…little does he know that they told me they no longer represent him. hahahahha!! not only that, there is no ‘shit’ on me because I’m a ‘good’ person and good luck to him to try to prove otherwise.

I have found that it’s really hard to find a lawyer who ‘gets it’. I have gone to Social Services, Victim Services, and now Legal Aid to try to get help and the first thing I ask is ‘are you familiar with mental disorders…particularly socio/pyscho paths?’ and go from there. If they scoff, I move on. sad, but true. my current lawyer, as of last Thursday, when asked that question, said ‘those are dangerous people’. I am so glad the ex did what he did on Thursday because now people BELIEVE what I’m saying, rather than trying to downplay it. for the first time in 2 years, I feel like I’m not in this fight alone.


Hope52, I wish you the very best on your settlement….”settlement.” LOL!! Like I posted, I don’t believe that any amount of money or any punishment can redress the life-altering choices that these people made to harm others.

I hope that your divorce will open the door to your own freedom, Hope52.

Brightest blessings



Daily dose of wisdom…. thank you!



I am just tied to him because he has to give me spousal support. My opinion a sociopath/psychopath will just continue doing the same thing.

Best revenge is a dish best served cold because karma always hits them in the face.



thanks for responding to my rant about Ian brady, He really is a deeply disturbing individual…sadistic psychopath…according to one of the psychs He was talking to, He was trying to insinuate He ‘frightened’ one the children he murdered to death because they couldn’t find a cause of death….He felt that powerful and in such control…oh God imagine needing to frighten a child to death to feel like a man! Sad, Sick, Depraved individual


bulletproof, I love your screen name.

I didn’t think you were ranting. Not at all. The programme was very disturbing and some people believe we, as a civilised society, shouldn’t give Brady airspace and I did consider whether I should watch it. Or even that I wanted to. I am sure he “enjoyed” the additional notoriety it gave him.

My lasting impression, however, was of Winnie Johnson, Keith Bennetts mother. Brave, courageous, proud and
just one wonderful human being. I really hope they are reunited in Heaven. RIP.


bulletproof and strongawoman I too watched a documentary and recent reports on Ian Brady. I do not think he could remember where Keith Bennet is buried, he is manipulating this situation for power and control. He was taken back to Saddleworth some years ago to locate the place where this poor boy was buried and it was apparent then he didn’t know. All the stories about letters and notes are just ways for him to create drama and hurt the Bennet family even more by giving them a little hope.
He is a vile evil man . I understand the hunger strike is another way for him to be in control and in the limelight-as he will apparently end the hunger strike if he gets to move to a different prison! Like all spaths- if his lips are moving he is telling lies.


Unfortunately, when my spath gets tired of “no contact” then that is when he stirs up trouble. Recently my spath (a doctor) returned my 15 year old daughter at 7:30pm and she was suffering from an allergic reaction to an antibiotic she was on. He had taken her to buy a puppy (two weeks before a schedule hearing to revised custody from every other weekend to sole custody for him. He knew the judge was going to ask her who she wanted to live with hence the need to buy a puppy before trial. He only really wanted 50 percent custody so he could cut the child support payment in half). I spent the rest of the evening contacting on call doctors and getting her medicine to soothe her symptoms of a red, blistered and swollen face and a blistery upper torso. The on call doctor told me to take her to her primary care physician the next day and I did. She confirmed that my daughter had a bad allergic reaction to her antibiotic. I texted my spath after the doctors office to say that what our daughter experience the day before was a drug allergy. He replied, “I thought so and I told her so”. He rendered no aid to his own daughter and he knew what was happening. So as easy as it seems to promote No Contact, the sociopath will create ways of instigating drama when it has been quiet for too long.

Also, don’t expect the courts to recognize sociopathic behavior. Two weeks later my attorney showed the judge graphic photos of my daughter’s swollen face and I described the situation to the judge and his response was, “Did you notify your ex-husband of the situation?” I said, he knew the situation because he dropped her off after being with her for 5 hours and offering her no assistance and he is a doctor. The judge refused to take the incident seriously. He later told me if I decided to continue with my evidence and testimony in this custody hearing he would just flip a coin so I might reconsider proceeding. He also told me to enroll in a co-parenting class with my ex. What a joke. I recently receive information that my ex had become the local bartender for my daughter and her 14 year old friends. So apparently alcohol is being served to minors around his new pool.

After 4 years of my ex-husband having every other weekends and Monday night dinner from 5pm-7pm, he now has my daughter from 7am Monday- 7am Wednesday and every other Friday from 7am. On his weekend he has her from 7am Friday until 7am Wednesday. We have been on this track for three weeks and my daughter has already missed most of a day of her volunteer shift (he didn’t wake her up and take her to her volunteer job) and he left in the middle of the mandatory parents sports meeting for the upcoming school year.

He also got away with taking my daughter on a cruise during Spring Break week which is the holiday week I have had with my daughter for the past 4 years. My job prevents me from taking the week of winter break off. The same judge insisted that he be allowed to highjack my holiday week so my ex got both of the school break weeks this past year. The judge told me to plan a vacation with my daughter anywhere in the world and my ex would pay for it because my ex had been underhanded- the judges words. I engaged a 14 year old in a vacation planning exercise (reasonable) and on the day I was told to bring the itenerary to the judge with the cost, the judge said, “Oh, by the way, I don’t have the authority to enforce this. Sorry”. I paid a lawyer $600, took of work and hand to break my daughters heart when I told her the trip was just a bunch of adults messing with a teenager.

Be strong but know that when you are dealing with a sociopath nothing is fair because the general population does not know how to or want to deal with these types of people, so those who follow the appropriate rules of conduct will get be on the short end of the stick at times.

I am working on developing a support group for those people in my community that have to deal with this particular judge in family court.

My daughter realizes she was played by her dad when he bought a house with a swimming pool and a new puppy before the hearing. Unfortunately, in my state the law guardians don’t seem to questions why a child who was content with every other weekend visitation with her father now thinks 50/50 is ok. They just think that a child whose brain is not yet fully developed at 14 years of age can make an informed decision. The judge and law guardian were both told that my ex bought a house with a swimming pool and a puppy before the custody hearing and both didn’t think that was a ploy to sway a 14 year old who had said prior to this that the original visitation was fine.

Godspeed to everyone who has a sociopath in their lives…..



I always find the timing of your blogs to be perfect as they relate to where I am in my life. When I divorced over 3 years ago I thought I was just divorcing a selfish jerk who lied a lot and used me for money and credit. It wasn’t until this past year that I’ve started to put the puzzle pieces together as I learned more about the word “sociopath.” My first resource on the subject was your site and I’ve been drawn to it ever since. It has helped me to understand more, and it has given me more pieces of the puzzle. Thank you!

Due to my ex spath looking to charm the judicial system (claims to be a cop, a law student, a former officer of the court and a disabled vet–not bad for a guy who’s 34 *snickers) and try to use it against me. I’ve learned it’s important to save EVERYTHING! I recently obtained my counseling records from when I was still married to my ex spath (2008). I was severely depressed and put myself in counseling against the spath’s wishes and threats against me if I went. He was the source of my depression. Counselor noted that I showed symptoms of an abused women. She noted “domestic abuse” a few times and reminded me of “power and control” whenever I made excuses for him and when I thought things were getting better. It was clear to her I was a victim of emotional abuse and isolation.

After reading, and reading some not-so-pleasant counseling records, going over my mounds of evidence (letters, emails, text messages, etc) the puzzle is becoming more clear! I finally get the bigger picture. Now I am feeling the anger and emotions I wish I would have felt over 3 years ago. Now I feel like my healing is taking place. Now I know I was just used, never loved, taken advantage of, and 10 years of my life were stolen based on his lies and manipulations. I’m pissed! We have 3 kids together and he’s playing the same manipulating mind games on them. Using them as pawns against me. It’s an ugly game. That pisses me off even more! I want to see this new empire he’s built up crumble. I want this new rich family he’s taking advantage of and milking a home, money, cars from to see the light of the truth. He’s hurt so many people. He’s burned many bridges, yet he always is able to move on quickly and find a new victim. He’s just like a cockroach. Nothing takes or keeps him down!

I was just sharing these feelings with my fiance this past weekend. When I sent him this blog he said “did you write this?” Everything in this is what I am going through and it is frustrating. I’ve limited my contact to “emergency only” but that doesn’t stop him from texting and emailing me. So I ignore him and those lack of responses he is trying to use against me to make me look like bad mother.

I was a young 20 year old girl who was lured into marriage in 6 months by a sociopath. I suffered in an unloving marriage for 10 years! It sucks. I am not vindictive. I am always forgiving and give the benefit of the doubt. I believe in second chances. To me he deserves none of that. I wish he could pay me and my family back the thousands he conned. Give me my credit back so I can move on with my fiance & kids and we no longer have to pay for his selfish mistakes of the past. I know none of this will happen. I DO WANT REVENGE! I want my name cleared of all the lies. I don’t want him emotionally abusing my kids. I am worried about their innocent little minds being filled with his toxins. There’s a lot I want but at the end of the day, I just want him to suffer. I want him to feel something. I want him to go to hell. He deserves nothing less.


“It’s not a good idea to consciously go out to seek revenge.”

This is a little disingenous, no?

You have a website triggered by your desire to understand expose the actions of your named psychological-attacker and you make sure to state his name here and through your media productions.

Don’t deny others the information they need to achieve the same focus on their perpetrators.



I can see your point theoretically, and yet it’s a bit misleading, imho. Loevraud is not a blog aimed at exposing and revenging herself at her ex, even if she has no issues at naming her spath and isn’t using an anonymous blog name. It’s a place of info, help and support for victims, learning to recognize red flags, discuss our opinions on suspect media cases, etc…

Since Donna Anderson does not remain anonymous herself, it’s pretty useless to keep the spath anonymous. When I talk in person to people (that is, I’m clearly not anonymous) about the spath I simply use his name too. There’s little point in not naming him then. That doesn’t mean I’m revenging myself on him though. And if I were say interviewed by a magazine regarding sociopathy and opt not to remain anonymous I would mention his name too.


Thank you, callmeathena! “It happened. So what. Move on.” I’ve read that “brevity is the soul of wit” and that closing few statements were as profound for me as all the wise words in this blog. I’m making that my screen saver and may even get a tattoo. Thank you again.


Hello all. It’s me Lillian. The end is here. Not near. It was near for four miserable years. The end is here. I am 50. No one will hire me. I have thyroid disease and just had spinal surgery to repair my spinal column in my neck. I lost my house finally. And the creditors have attached my bank account. I live in a garage. I’m so far under I can’t possibly dig out. I’m humiated. Oh and yes I’m alive but I haven’t a clue as to why I bothered with that. I have no one to turn to. I have no where to go. I have nocontactwith the apathy but that and $3,00 will buy me a Starbucks. I really don’t have any friends and I’m sick of it. It’s been five long lonely devistating years and all the hoo rah in the world can’t help me now. I’m intelligent. I know what’s up. I know I have no alternatives. I want to quit. He won. Claim him the winner. Stop the world I want to get off. What more is there for me to do. I worked hard and long my entire life for nothing. To end up here with nothing. I hate wjho I’ve become. And it hasn’t been a few weeks. It’s turned into years. I actually hopes I died during my spinal surgery. But Im just not that lucky. I’m sorry but even with all the support and the hoo rahs some one else on here must feel the same as I do. Or did. And they either lived to tell the tale or they didn’t. I guess if anyone was this low after so long and got back on their feet I’d love to hear about it. And how or what I can possibly do by myself to start below ground zero and actually survive. Love to you all. I’m at a loss. I’m at my wits end. And my fear of prison is fading. I swear! Lillian



you poor darling. I am so sorry that you have been dealt this shiat. What can I say to you that doesn’t sound like hot air and not much else. To think that your life is over at 50!…..that is terrible for you. Why can’t you get any assistance.? You have had surgery but you’re living in a garage? What about bankruptcy?

I’m sorry if I am just making it worse…..Yes there are people here who have lost everything and are going through the hell that you have been and are still going through.

Hold on. Don’t give up Lillian


I just confronted my husband about my missing elementary school photos. They were in my underwear drawyer three weeks ago, but now are gone.

I asked him to please not throw them away. He said it’s all in my head…I HAVE PROBLEMS!

Well, I’m upset that I failed to remove the pics from his temptation. What a loser he must be!

He says that everyone wonders why he ever married me…I used to wonder that too, but have come to realize that he married me because I was the only person he dated who had money and “stuff” that he could steal.

I neither hate him nor do I seek revenge. I feel indifference…the real opposite of love. I no longer care enough to feel any emotions towards him.

Yes, I’d like all of my things back, but that seems futile. So, I’m trying to be content with what I still have…enough presence of mind to recognize that he is sick beyond all help.

I truly do wish that judges would be professionally required to take continuing education classes to recognize devient behaviors, but for now it’s just the luck of the draw court wise.

Lillian, he’s lucky that you’re not like him. If you were, you’d find a way to exact revenge upon him. So the good news is that living with him did not turn you into someone just like him.

Before too long, I will be free too. I have no job, am 64 years old, and because my income went into a “joint” account that in reality was my name added to his personal account, credit wise I no longer exist. He also encouraged me to have my checks made out directly to his personal company, so many of my checks weren’t even endorsed by me…boy did I ever make it easy for him to steal my income!

It will be rough, but I will no longer be living under the control of someone who installed carmeras, networked our computers so he could read all of my e-mails and view what I was browsing. He also monitored my USPS mail and likely installed listening devices on the telephones (that were put solely into his name.

He might take everything I own with him, but I will retain my humanity and live free from his paranoid control..

I actually do pity him. He’s so unhappy with his being that he can never be honest, not even with himself. My slag of a husband truly feels no shame remorse, or most emotions that normal people seem to feel. He is a fraud who seems only capable of emoting superior righteousness. Strangely, it doesn’t seem to bother him that he only exists as a lie.

I think that the fact that I feel indifference towards him is going to make no contact easy for me. I’ll also need a new computer because he currently runs a computer network that allows him to view client’s computers in other states.

(HUGS) to all of you.

Ox Drover

Dear I’mconfused,

It is tough, at any age to disengage from themm, and especially financially. I hope you can break free and still keep a roof over your head. The thing is, I think, that it is better to live in a card board box in peace than in a mansion in chaos and fear. Good luck and God bless. You are in my prayers.


Last night I was on computer and got this urge to get even with Jim. I attempted to contact his ex-wife but was unsuccessful. It was a good thing cause I would have shot myself in the foot. Jim is so vicious and can do more damage to me than I can ever do to him. Best to keep my thoughts to chat boards like this.

See, I am curious because Jim’s daughter is living with him up here. Jim did not have visitation with his two daughters in my five years of dating him. And, now his daughter is up here with him. She is 17.

She was the difficult daughter for Jim to persuade, and now she’s up here laughing with him like they are the happiest family.

I learned of Jim’s daughter being with him when Jim finally picked up his wheelbarrow from neighbor Dana’s garage. Jim parked his wheel barrow in Dana’s garage and she was after him for a year to get it out. Finally he said he would pick-up his wheel barrel. I was sitting with Dana on her deck when he called. After Dana got off the phone she gave me the option to hide in her house or do what-ever I gotta do. I chose to stay cause it’s been two years since I was with him. I gotta face the devil sooner or later. He pulled in and his daughter was driving his truck. They got out laughing and talking like life is all sunny and rosy.

Dana ran into Jim and his daughter at gas station a few weeks later. Again they were laughing and talking like life is all sunny and rosy.

My curiosity is peaked. I am waiting for this happy relationship to crash and burn. One part of me wishes that it would make Jim a nicer person so that I don’t have to watch my step if I run into him. But, I know their relationship will crash and burn. Jim is ecstatic right now to have his daughter around, but he gained her through manipulation.

Before I left Jim on July 4, 2010 He was secretly having contact with his daughters without their mothers knowledge. This was his first real contact in years. He claimed that their mother was keeping him away from them. He claimed that a court order for visitation was out of his reach because of ex-wife. He never mentioned that he wasn’t paying child support until he was facing jail time, and then he got his friends and me scrambling to come up with the purge money to keep him out of jail. That summer vacation of 2010 his daughter contacted him. Jim learned that the girls were home alone because their mother worked during the day. And he learned that the mother went to bed early because she had to get up early for work. So Jim talked on the phone with his daughters during the day while their mother was at work. He instructed them to delete his number off the caller ID. He played internet games with them at night after their mother went to bed. Cause she had to get up for work. This way he could interact with daughters on computer up here while his daughters were on computer in Milwaukee.

Since I know of Jim’s plot. I am really interested since he got the more “difficult” daughter up here. He didn’t get the more pliable daughter up here. The pliable daughter is the smart one. She is the one who called the sheriff to check on Jim when she couldn’t get a hold of him for months. She was about 8? at the time. She figured out the Adams County sheriff telephone number and called to ask them to check on her dad. Yet, she isn’t up here with her dad even though her sister is. Smart girl. She loves her dad yet knows that being around him is a train-wreck. So I’m guessing this is the reason.

Any hoo, I was just posting to getting even with the sociopath. It was tempting, but I didn’t do anything to get even. I will delight to see the crash and burn of his relationship with his daughter. Call me sadistic? Oh, come on. Jim is so mean and hateful and can never be wrong, and looks down at women. He will be exploding at that girl in time. jim had told me that when he had placement years ago that he wouldn’t allow his kids friends over cause he said kids steal.

He will be exploding at her. She is 17 going on 18 and she will be pushing to widen the boundaries.


On a funny note. I think. If Jim’s daughter decides to live up here she will be riding the school bus with my son. My son is handsome as he can be. Blue eyes and strawberry blonde curly hair. He won’t be interested cause she is Jim’s daughter.

It will really cause friction between Jim and his daughter cause Jim decided long ago that my son is going to prison.

Whereas my son is taking medical college credits in high school and will graduate as a CNA at high school graduation. From there he plans to go on to become a RN. And, he plans to eventually become a doctor.

He is taking it in steps so he gets work experience while he goes to school.


jeannie,, Curiosity killed the cat,,leave well enough alone and get on with your life..Sounds to me like you have nothing to gain here but more drama..I know you didnt ask me what I think but…


To Hens, that is why I am posting it here


What is the point of posting a blog about Getting Revenge on the Sociopath when our responses are dismissed as petty mess.

Seems to me that we gotta duck our heads, and let the bad guy get away with it.


didnt mean to offend ya jeannie – i thinks its fine to post about it here and vent your feelings..i was just puttin my 2 cents in – so sorry

Hi Jeannie,
it’s nice to hear/read from you.
Excellent about your son. Make sure he knows about spaths, because this stuff is hereditary. When a parent gets taken by spaths, the children are often vulnerable.

About revenge…it’s only human… and it’s infantile.
The more we mature the less the spath matters. It’s like the little boys who pulled our pigtails in grade school. OOOOHhhh how I hated those boys. There were twins, asian twins. Peter and Paul were their names in first grade. I couldn’t tell them apart, but one of them tripped me on purpose. I was infuriated. Donald, a little black boy, made the mistake of standing there laughing at me. I got up and SLAPPED HIS FACE. I was 5. He was shocked. Yeah, I got the last laugh on Donald.

I couldn’t get even with Peter or Paul, because I couldn’t tell them apart, but I got even with Donald! Looking back, I see that one day, my spath and his attempted murder on me will be just like that. I will remember it as a childish reaction to a childish behavior. No different. I just need to grow up some more. I will rise above that sandbox. That’s exactly what spaths fear we will do. They fear we will refuse to play their game, refuse to want revenge, refuse to become like them, refuse to become their rivals.

Truthfully, it is horrific that spaths kill, poison, destroy. I don’t have the answer yet because I’m not that mature yet. Maybe it’s just a matter of trusting the universe to take care of itself, while we do what we must do to create justice in the world, without taking it personally.
Not revenge served cold, but justice served cold.


thank you Donna for this latest article.

I tell you, when it seems like I could not have anything else happen to me, then something else happens. This is exactly what I needed to hear, as my path is paved with many boulders on the road, I seem to make my way, and coming back to LoveFraud seems to do the trick every time.

I love it, “Living well is the best revenge”!!

Can I ask you a question? My spath is my mother? Do you have any bloggers in this situation?


For me, personally, the whole idea of craving revenge is kind of scary because to me, that would make me like the psychopath. “Getting even” with others for real or perceived ego wounding is the way they think.

On top of that, wanting to make him or her suffer keeps me connected to the spath. I’ve read that hate is not the opposite of love, indifference is the opposite of love; that resonates with me.

To my way of thinking, for myself, its much healthier for me to simply detach, become indifferent to the spath, and go my own way. But then, I’m not in a position where I am married to one, or divorced from one or have children with one. In that way, I am blessed. I also work independently and can walk away from a psycho client if I need to.

Its like, I’ve been there and done that: raised by a parent with spath traits, worked full-time on salary for spath bosses, for decades, so, I’ve already been to hell. My strategy is to recognize early on any spath traits that may be showing up in a new client or new friendship and just say “sayonara” earlier rather than later. I don’t think that just detaching and moving on is revenge, is it?

On the other hand, if someone seriously injured me, say, financially, such as if I loaned someone a good deal of money and they refused to pay me back, or if someone physically assaulted me, or hit me with their car, etc., then I would most certainly take them to court. I guess I never thought of suing someone for damages as a revenge behavior, but, maybe it is. I always just thought of suing someone who has injured you or stolen from you, as getting justice. But maybe that’s revenge as well?



To Jeannie812:
I agree with your statement – they get away with it.
However, I hope that my ex will get what he deserves in due time.
He took advantage of me, lying, cheating, and never loved me. He is now with a very rich widow – living in her $1 million dollar house and driving the dead husbands luxury car.
He and the new girlfriend (I feel sorry for her – she will find out one day) hosted a birthday party for his ex wife and her husband!! He is inviting everyone and anyone over to “HIS” house. I asked someone who went – do you think he really loves her or is it just for “look what I now have?” and the answer was not for love.
He told me he would find a rich widow and has no qualms about being supported by her – and he did just that.
Am I angry? No, but evil people like him do not deserve to exist on this earth. But, there is nothing I can do.
If I tried to warn her – I would most likely be arrested or something. I am sure he has told her all lies about me and she would not believe it anyway.
So, until Karma comes around to him….

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