I’ve been thinking lately about God, assuming He exists. Mainly, I’ve been thinking about the Judeo-Christian biblical conception of God, and asking myself, crazy as this sounds, if He exists, Is God a sociopath?
I pose this question seriously, and apologize in advance for offending anyone by probing this idea. But consider:
You are expected to worship Him.
You are expected to acknowledge His perfection.
You are expected to live by His standards.
You are expected to fear His Judgement.
You are expected to please, not disappoint Him.
You are expected to do penance when you’ve strayed from His rules.
You are expected to be in awe of, and fear, His omniscience.
You are expected to be in awe of, and fear, His omnipotence.
You are expected to prize His love, and fear His wrath.
You are expected to seek, and follow, His guidance.
When He feels unheeded, He licenses Himself to unleash cruel, violent, devastating rages (see the Flood, among countless other examples).
He is a punisher.
He is perfect.
He has no guilt; yet He instills guilt.
He “made,” and he “works,” the world and universe from “above,” sitting in Judgement of all who deviate from Him.
He is infallible.
He is unaccountable.
He is callous—a cause of, and silent witness to, untold violence and suffering in the history of humanity.
He is “entitled—”to judge, and punish, as He likes.
He is controlling to a highly pathological degree, for all the reasons stated above.
He is merciful, so long as you heed Him. Otherwise, He can be merciless.
He expects to be idealized and treated like a God.
He rages, and inflicts the cruelest of punishments, when He feels defied.
His word is the bible.
Now you tell me: If I were describing a human being in these terms, what conclusion would you draw? I suspect, if you weren’t feeling defensive, that you’d conclude that we’re talking about someone with a case of seriously malignant narcissism edging, perhaps, into the realm of sociopathy?
But, of course, I’m describing the Judeo-Christian God.
Think about this: from the earliest age, this is your almighty Father figure. You are taught to worship Him, seek His love, His mercy, accept His perfection and infallibility.
You are taught that His word is final; His wrath is justified; to feel shame before His eyes.
You are taught to have to work hard to earn your way back into His good graces, and to be grateful for His forgiveness.
His judgement is final, and even terrifying.
Now if this is the Father figure we’ve been raised to heed and idealize from birth, is it not fair to wonder how much this relationship—with God—might predispose us to end up with a sociopath?
Does one’s adult relationship with a sociopath not replicate, in certain ways, one’s relationship with God?
I pose this as food for thought, nothing else. But I will follow-up this post in the next several weeks, to further flesh out my thoughts, factoring in, as well, your initial feedback.
(This article is copyrighted (c) 2010 by Steve Becker, LCSW.)
It’s interesting to read how many people get angry about words – questions – opinions. Why? We believe what we learned.
If you believe that an all-good God exists – why get angry at people who don’t believe or who ask questions?
We should be loving and kind to each other (spiritual) – the opposite from the Sociopaths in our lives.
We live in one of the greatest countries in the world – mainly because we are free to believe anything and say anything we want. Why should be have to hide in a closet (or behind the couch:) if we don’t believe in a personal God?
My question to all of you believers – Where is God when children get sexually or physically abused? Where is God when children get kidnapped or killed? Where is God when a storm hits and hundreds of innocent people lose their homes or their loved ones? Where was God during the Crusades, Hitler’s holocast, Stalin’s murderous rampages, Rowanda’s genocide…
Did he create us – and is watching? Where is he/she? Behind billions of galaxies? In the middle of billions of stars?
Most people on earth don’t believe in a Christian God. If you ask one hundred people what they believe – you will get one hundred different answers. Who is right? You? The problem is that very few people ask because it’s not a topic anyone wants to discuss. Why?
Steve is right. Ask some interesting questions and be open to new ways of looking at things. Maybe – just maybe – you will discover something new.
There is one universal truth: We all have to die and we don’t know when that will be. So, be kind to each other, and don’t get angry when someone doesn’t believe the way you do.
Petra60,
l am mad at no one just at the illogic of it all. Here is another good one from the headlines today. SCIENTIST SAYS THAT GRAVITY DOESN’T EXIST. Believe it or not.
Petra60, very eloquently stated and I agree that we should always question so as to understand. Had I been more apt to question things when I was younger, it’s quite possible that I may not have chosen a sociopath as a partner. Blind faith may seem noble, but it can be a very dangerous choice.
I completely disagree with the assessment that the Bible was written for men and women to be “equal.” Using/abusing Biblical passages was one of the “tools” that the ex spath employed to “keep me in my place” by using my systems of beliefs and religious influences against me. In fact, after I finally left, the ex spath would specifically TARGET Southern Christian women simply because of previously mentioned purposes. Religion – organized religion – gave him the necessary tools to excuse (been forgiven of sins via baptism) his abuses and drive home his interpretations for the maximum control possible. And, from my personal experience, the majority of leaders in the organized religions that I have experienced over my 50 years have also used the cloak of religion to “excuse” their vile behaviors – from sexual assault to fraud to murder.
The teachings of Christ were not based upon any book written by man, plain and simple – the inspiration came from a Higher Authority rather than a human author. It is an unfortunate fact that the Bible was carefully edited with numerous “books” and writings being excluded (by concensus) so as to best outline the moral and cultural doctrines that were popular during the time when it was finally translated and voted into existence as the “Bible.” At that time, men and women were NOT viewed as “equal” in culture or society, and women were disallowed to maintain ANY leadership roles in organized Christianity – this practice is STILL pervasive in many organized religions.
I have many Jewish friends who have explained that many Hebrew and other ancient characters often do not have a literal English translation, and that substitutions were made in translation to “make sense” of many Hebrew characters to fill in the gaps.
My personal view, again – VERY personal – is that a positive personal relationship with a Higher Power (regardless of what name is used) is essential to healing and personal growth. I just do not feel that any other human being is entitled to dictate my spiritual doctrines. If my personal beliefs assist me in healing, reaching my true potential, and moving through this lifetime WITHOUT DOING HARM to others, then I believe that I’m doing my best to do what God has intended for me. In my view, God does NOT want human beings to suffer. God doesn’t strike people down to get their attention or teach us a lesson. God can (and, does) intervene with POSITIVE messages to compel me to think for myself and learn from all of my experiences. I do believe in miracles – how could I not when I watch the sun paint the clouds more perfectly than I could ever dream of doing?
The majority of the suffering of mankind is either simply due to Natural events and human (mortal) conditions (tidal waves, illnesses, accidents), OR initiated by mankind, itself (war, bigotry, exclusion, etc.). My suffering with the ex spath was due to the fact that I made a very, very bad choice for a partner in spite of ALL of the flapping, waving, screaming RED FLAGS. I blame HIM for perpetrating his violence and abuse, but I had to accept my responsibility for choosing him and giving unconditional love and trust in spite of all of the warnings. This is NOT to say, by any stretch of the imagination, that anyone deserves to experience the ravages of a sociopath – it simply means that I had my suspicions and ignored them because I fell in love with a fantasy.
Steve’s queries have angered some members, unfortunately. I choose to set aside “outrage” at his points and see beyond the words to the core of his motivation: WHO decides what God is, and isn’t? The answer, of course, is mankind.
It’s an interesting topic to ponder.
Hi Psyche:) no I wasnt aiming it at you at all – apologies if you thought that:)x
Personally I think Steve was incredibly brave for posting this article because freethinkers always catch a lot of heat when talking openly about the Bible. Countless books have been written about God’s demeanor- the fact that someone is questioning it really should not come as a shock. The fact that it does come as a shock serves as a disturbing reminder as well as an affirmation of the control religion has over some.
Let me share, since I don’t mind getting personal:
As a child I grew up horrified at the idea of hell and I prayed for all my relatives who passed away thinking they would wind up in hell because I knew they weren’t perfect. They didn’t go to church, they smoked, they cursed, so that would surely guarantee their placement in eternal hellfire. Besides worrying for my unworthy, damned family, I also begged God at night not to hate us so much that he would destroy the earth like predicted in Revelations. I remember being very scared of prophecies of the end of the world- I can easily relive being a child laying in my bed in the dark thinking about God. I liked God but at the very same time, I was terrified of God.
And I’ve just come to this conclusion:
I think to a certain extent, there is a bit of Stockholm Syndrome that happens with religion. You know, when you “friend” your captor just to survive. Just like a girl who is kidnapped as a child, raped, held captive, and bears children to her holder, you forget you were there against your will and start to cope, and even miss your dominator once he is arrested because you’ve somehow managed to adjust to this lifestyle- for survival. For psychological survival, otherwise, you would go completely insane. You learn how to accept brutality, and how to please your punisher. You learn to acept what is irrational.
I remember my first confession. I was given a list of things on a sheet, I guess to spark our memory in case we forgot a sin, and there was good old masturbation. So, now, as a young girl, I would have to tell the grown man in the box next to me that I had touched myself. Wow, what a sin. First of all, this is just ridiculous. It was none of his business that I, as a dignified human, had decided to explore my own personal body that way. Secondly, what this did was enforce the unhealthy idea that I was a dirty person, and only someone else would have the power to take that off me and make me good again. (I know confession is a Catholic only thing. But that’s how I was RAISED, which was Steve’s entire point.)
So now you tell me, how much effect did religion have on my childhood? Did religion help, or hurt my ability to recognize boundaries and- did it benefit my self esteem and overall core personality? Now couple this with coming from a dysfunctional family and a mother who was God-like in personality.
It’s no wonder I spent my life feeling trapped and powerless against others. Guilt for having my own needs is something I still struggle with. Squelching my needs to the point where I’m ready to snap for the sake of what others want is not an easy way to live, but I’ve lived that way many years.
As an adult, I still tried to find religion because of the pressure from society to do so. “What’ wrong with me that I’m not “feeling” this,” you ask yourself. And then you are told you can’t “get it” because you are somehow flawed and haven’t let the “spirit in”. Basically, you haven’t caved into the Stockholm Syndrome, where you allow yourself to submit fully and unquestioningly to your captor. To submit to Christianity is to accept the challenge of walking a tightrope and knowing that you must perform correctly or suffer the brutal torment of eternal hell. So one must convince themself that God is their friend, and if they submit fully, they will recieve reward, however, if they fail, they will recieve eternal damnation. And then many go on to have children, and create the Stockholm Syndrome for their children, who have never heard of hell or punishment, who had no idea there was a deity in heaven watching every move they make, keeping score. So we in turn pass down a religiously induced Stockholm Syndrome generation after generation, until someone is strong enough to resist succumbing, which causes that person to recieve a lot of pressure and anger from society, who is collectively all under the Stockholm Syndrome spell.
And when you look back through history, you see that Christianity did in fact spread through a forceful rape of society, through torturing and killing those who refused to succumb, while those who survived did so only because they submitted to the coercion, thereby creating a Stockholm Syndrome in order to cope with the opression and threat- because that’s what they had to do.
This rape of society were the 4 Inquisitions and the countless other brutal ways that people were forced into a lifestyle against their will. Paul’s Letters to the Corinthians are actually proof of this. These are also God-like letters where he talks about God being wonderful and full of love, and then at the same time, harshly threatens them to succumb to Chrisitianity before he comes to them to inflict harsh punishment on them if they don’t. There were people even back then who scoffed at Paul’s threats- because he talks about it in the letters, and says he is aware of the doubters, but he will come there and make them all sorry, don’t make him have to do that. So these people were being forced by Paul to accept Christianity. And that really was the beginning of Catholicism, also known as Paulism. The continual force and coercion of society continued for centuries after. Now, no coercion is even needed. The Stockholm Syndrome is in place, and just like the kidnapped hostage, society feels a certain kind of comfort from being born captive. They like it so much they want to protect, and they even love- the captor.
It’s just a theory. Please don’t anyone go nuts.
Just a reminder to everyone … 1000 years in man’s life equals 1 day for our Lord. It’s 2010, do the math.
Sharon C., try changing your views about the history of Christianity this way … that the wars were to rid the world of the sociopathic/psychopathic personalities of the day? Today, what do our courts do? A big NOTHING except take the money, time, patience of the law abiding citizens in this country and tell them they won … now go and do something about it. (LOL).
Yes, it’s a “Normal” personality that slaps a bomb onto a child and have them walk into a public place to blow up innocent people.
Yes, it’s a “Normal” personality that orders their recruits to fly planes into buildings.
Yes, it’s a “Normal” personality that insists that if you become a martyr for lunatics causes, your family will be taken care of for the rest of their days.
Should I go on? Stop looking at the punishments being handed down to loving, kind, compassionate people. Look at who the punishments (which is how we got our law by the way) are intended for … aka psychopaths, sociopaths, anti-social personalities that hate their neighbor’s, hate government, hate rules and regulations, hate you and me.
Oh, we should be blinded like the bleeding hearts that said over the years … let’s just lock them away for the rest of their lives. Why? Did they care about you or your loved ones? Can you change them to be a functioning member of society to live in peace and harmony with the rest of us?
Finally, what is the definition of SIN? Sin means to break the law.
Peace.
Hi Wini-
I respect that your views are different from mine, however I did spend a lot of time contemplating my views over the years and I am at a point in my life now where my views work for me, and I prefer these views.
If you recall, from your post above, God often recruited chosen people to carry out his plans as well, sometimes those plans included mass murder and genocide.
And while God didn’t tell anyone to strap a bomb to a child, God did test Abraham by asking him to offer his only son, Isaac, whom he loved (as written in the Bible) as a burnt offering. The next day, Abraham chopped wood, took 2 servants, his son, and a donkey to the region where the Lord told him to go. When he could see the mountain, he asked the 2 men to stay with the donkey and proceeded on with his son. Then his son, who was obviously old enough to walk and speak, asked, “Father, where is the lamb we will sacrifice?” “God will see to it, my son” was the answer.
The Bible isn’t too detailed other than the father tied his son up and laid him over the altar. When Abraham lifted the knife to make the slice, an angel of God appeared and stopped him.
Ok- do I really need to point out to anyone the deranged kind of personality that would take pleasure in this sadistic kind of test? And in this modern age, what could possibly convince otherwise healthy people to accept this, and rationalize this? If God came to you today and asked you to murder your most loved person, would you? Would you rationalize and accept God’s wishes, or would you be terrified that you were dealing with a psychopath?
These are common sense questions. I’ve asked myself these 1000 times. I’ve tried to accept, I’ve tried to rationalize, all the while the fear of “what if hell is real” and not being able to feel free from the pressure to conform and be a believer. And then, I began reading about Thomas Jefferson, Ben Franklin, James Madison- yes, our founding fathers. And I began learning about the Age of Enlightenment and Thomas Paine. And even Einstein. And then I found my home. I found where I belong. I agree with these people- all these people, and their writings and opinions. They were not atheists- they believed in a creator, just, not the one in the Bible.
Never did I feel before like I had found my place. But in my political searches, I had also discovered there were others out there who thought like I did, and these were credible people, people who I admired. After that, I just felt it was a lot easier to let go of the fears instilled in me during childhood. For some reason, it became easy, very suddenly. I wasn’t alone, and I wasn’t weird.
Sharon C, I wrote you because after being on this site for a while, you have read articles and other people’s blogs stating the anti-social personalities are every where. Every walk of life with no exception.
With that said, remember who misused you in your life. Anti-social personalities that happened to twist and contort what was written in the Bible.
That’s why I wrote you … so you would remember it was the individuals, not the Truth that Jesus left us.
For every one thing we believe – we can find a supportive document or book.
What is “gravity”? No one knows. It’s an abstract word to make sense of why we don’t fall into space.
I learned English at age 16. There were many abstract words that nobody could explain to me…”faith” was one of them.
Who is that “God” who created human beings in his own image and then sat back to watch – or help athletes win a soccer game? If so much is known about “God” – what he did, does, doesn’t do, will do in the future – why doesn’t anyone know where he is or why he allows children to get raped by priests, or women abused by sociopaths, or soldiers to be sent to war?
You could make an argument for “free will” – but, children don’t have a voice or the strength to defend themselves…women don’t want to be abused…and soldiers don’t want to get killed. How can God be “omnipotent” (has unlimited power and can do anything) and close his eyes to the crimes that are being committed against humanity? If you want to blame it on the devil – why did “God” create him if he is all-knowing. That certainly would make him a sociopath.
We are human beings and have the power to use our brain to ask questions and find answers that make sense.
However, if you truly believe that there is a God who will punish “bad people” sooner or later…who will be there for you after you die…who is looking out for those who deserve it…and who forgives only those who believe in him…then that is your perogative.
If you are strong in your belief – you wouldn’t feel threatened or get angry – or judge non-believers.
As far as I am concerned – any belief is valid if it doesn’t hurt anyone else.
I for one believe that “God” is more magnificent and awe inspiring than anyone ever imagined…it is infinite and all powerful…it is without judgment…and is a force to be reckoned with. It’s the “universe”.
Just think: In addition to spinning on its axis, the Earth also revolves around the Sun. We are approximately 93 million miles (150 million km) from the Sun, and at that distance, it takes us one year (365 days) to go around once. The full path of the Earth’s orbit is close to 600 million miles (970 million km). To go around this immense circle in one year takes a speed of 66,000 miles per hour (107,000 km/hr)3. Not only that – but, the galaxies are spinning and there are billions of galaxies in the universe. It’s not guess work or make-believe…it’s documented and photographed. Take a look at the “Hubble Gallery photos” or the NASA “Astronomy Pictures of the Day”.
We are a 1400 times smaller than Jupiter…and couldn’t reach that planet in a life time even if we had the means…and yet – we take ourselves so seriously. We waste the little bit of time we have on this earth to argue, fight, hate, despise, plan revenge, judge, scream, curse, cry. I know it sounds corny – but, try to respect each other…try to believe in yourself…try to treat each other with kindness.