I’ve been thinking lately about God, assuming He exists. Mainly, I’ve been thinking about the Judeo-Christian biblical conception of God, and asking myself, crazy as this sounds, if He exists, Is God a sociopath?
I pose this question seriously, and apologize in advance for offending anyone by probing this idea. But consider:
You are expected to worship Him.
You are expected to acknowledge His perfection.
You are expected to live by His standards.
You are expected to fear His Judgement.
You are expected to please, not disappoint Him.
You are expected to do penance when you’ve strayed from His rules.
You are expected to be in awe of, and fear, His omniscience.
You are expected to be in awe of, and fear, His omnipotence.
You are expected to prize His love, and fear His wrath.
You are expected to seek, and follow, His guidance.
When He feels unheeded, He licenses Himself to unleash cruel, violent, devastating rages (see the Flood, among countless other examples).
He is a punisher.
He is perfect.
He has no guilt; yet He instills guilt.
He “made,” and he “works,” the world and universe from “above,” sitting in Judgement of all who deviate from Him.
He is infallible.
He is unaccountable.
He is callous—a cause of, and silent witness to, untold violence and suffering in the history of humanity.
He is “entitled—”to judge, and punish, as He likes.
He is controlling to a highly pathological degree, for all the reasons stated above.
He is merciful, so long as you heed Him. Otherwise, He can be merciless.
He expects to be idealized and treated like a God.
He rages, and inflicts the cruelest of punishments, when He feels defied.
His word is the bible.
Now you tell me: If I were describing a human being in these terms, what conclusion would you draw? I suspect, if you weren’t feeling defensive, that you’d conclude that we’re talking about someone with a case of seriously malignant narcissism edging, perhaps, into the realm of sociopathy?
But, of course, I’m describing the Judeo-Christian God.
Think about this: from the earliest age, this is your almighty Father figure. You are taught to worship Him, seek His love, His mercy, accept His perfection and infallibility.
You are taught that His word is final; His wrath is justified; to feel shame before His eyes.
You are taught to have to work hard to earn your way back into His good graces, and to be grateful for His forgiveness.
His judgement is final, and even terrifying.
Now if this is the Father figure we’ve been raised to heed and idealize from birth, is it not fair to wonder how much this relationship—with God—might predispose us to end up with a sociopath?
Does one’s adult relationship with a sociopath not replicate, in certain ways, one’s relationship with God?
I pose this as food for thought, nothing else. But I will follow-up this post in the next several weeks, to further flesh out my thoughts, factoring in, as well, your initial feedback.
(This article is copyrighted (c) 2010 by Steve Becker, LCSW.)
one, I was taught, as a child, that God loves us,
I was not taught the way Steve laid it out in the article,
so I would have to say… yes, my Christian upbringing
nurtured me as a child, and still does.
This is *exactly* what they talk about at the International Psychohistorical Association:
http://www.psychohistory.com/
God as parent, and if your parents were like this, your God is like this. Then, politically, you seek out leaders who are like this . . . no accountability in government, “conservative” ideas of what a big-daddy president should look and act like, and a society of “punishment” for being “bad” — defined, of course, as thinking for yourself.
Lloyd DeMause’s book, “Foundations of Psychohistory,” is just great on the topic. Lots of political cartoons with telling images!
I don’t know the god presented in this article. However, I do know the God of the Bible.
Christianity is NOT a religion-it’s a person: Jesus Christ. Any time you mention His name, you are going to have a response.
C.S. Lewis, as an atheist. set out to prove the Bible wrong and was converted. If interested read: ‘Mere Christianity’.
I am not going to defend God, He doesn’t need me to defend Him.
I’m a recovering catholic in a country over shadowed by the dark side of Religious corruption, paedophile priests abound, story after story comes out…the cover ups the deafening silence from the Vatican…the damage to my generation in institutions, schools and communities by the Catholic Bishops, priests and followers…
I’m with one step on this one, it’s an intimate complex question…and I wouldn’t dream of stooping to argue it here, reduced to a paragraph or two….stunningly ridiculous but it’s an argument we have to have so thanks Steve…it’s a start, a stuttering puttering start!
the God I believe in is complex, extreme and transforms base metal into Gold (if you let him). Everyone has a part in that..even the sociopaths, they are useful in the process…but all loving and pure love, we cannotcomprehend it yet, it’s only when we die we will hopefully get it..one way or another….bring it on…but I am for extreme love…especially now…just love ..(and the kick boxing,and the boundaries, and saying NO to evil)….follow your intuition about love because that’s it, that’s all there is IMHO
I have been reading Lovefraud for over 3 years and have received much inspiration UNTIL NOW!!!!!!!! I am appalled at this article and offended. But ‘the world’ always has their opinion so as a Christian, I refuse to not voice mine. If not for God, I would have ‘caved in’ after the sociopath left me. My only hope was words from my Bible and fellow Christians. (thanks Twice Betrayed for your post above-I could not have said it better) May God bless you all.
I will not be reading or visiting this site after this post, so it can be deleted if anyone chooses to. I am shocked after some of the inspiring stories I have read that Donna would approve of this ‘trash’. BTW, I just ordered her book but I am sorry I spent God’s money.
I think some of us are missing the “spirit” of Steve’s message.
His title is shocking, and for that reason, riviting.
His point is, I think, that religion, itself, can and often IS psychopathic.
I don’t believe he was attacking God, the spirit, God…love and humility and charity and goodness….
Evil resides in people, folks. People just like you and me. Most of us are blessed with a conscience, and feel bad when we’ve caved into our baser instincts. We are human….psychopaths have no conscience and will use any method to gain control and furthar their agenda. Organized religion is the perfect medium to acheive this.
I think there is wisdominthe idea of questioning authority….root word, author…question, whom wrote the book and why? To what end?
There was a b ook in the 70’s entitled, “If You Meet the Buddah on the Road Kill Him.” Shocking? Yes. The point, We are what we eat…so to speak, we are what we read watch participate in, co-habit with, buy sell and trade.
It’s not a sin to think for yourself, to learn and grow and question authority. God gfave eachand everyone of us a mind, andmost of us a conscience.
Like everything else, ideas about God and spirit and life and love evolve…they always have….I’m open to evolving.
EB, can understand your dislike of Pittoilli (how the hell do you spell that?) oil…They say the sence of smell is one of the most powerful for evoking memories, be they good or bad…
I just remember being a kid in blue jeans, a peasant blouse, sandles and beads….awesome,awsome youth. Wish I wouldn’t have squandered it as I did, but we live and we learn.
Steve,
Thank you!
Being raised Southern Baptist and Mormon believe me I’ve believed organized religion promotes G.. as a psychopath.
However, I do have faith in spirituality and for me that means that each of us are a part of G.. or the universal spirit and therefore all things are divine!
Thank you for posting this.
Steve,
Interesting article…only problem being none of us have ever met God! So when you describe God as “he is this” and “he is that” or “he does this or he does that” — since you havent met him, you cant really judge or put into a category someone you’ve never met or had the opportunity to get to know!
🙂
Ive learned the question isnt is this one or that one a Sociopath… its how do I want to live my life, be treated, and be spiritually connected in a positive light that will enhance my life. I prefer to perceive it as its how you choose to view life, how you choose to worship or perceive the goings on around you, in your life and in your world.
Could the ones teaching/preaching about God be Sociopaths?? Could Sociopathic Satan be undermining God to be perceived a certain way?
The God Im spiritually connected to is not a Sociopath in my eyes, because I dont fear him, he has never harmed me and he is always by my side when I need him. And when we have a difference of opinion its not his way or the highway…because we are always walking, talking together…in my mind…
I appreciate and respect your curiosity and your courage to simply express your thoughts. As that is all they are.. your thoughts. I dont have to agree or disagree… as it doesnt matter in the scheme of life… but I enjoy your individuality and all of your articles that offer “food for thought”!
Hi Kim Frederick!
You stated: I think some of us are missing the “spirit” of Steve’s message.
As I continue my journey toward healing, one of the things that I noticed that had me hooked into the sociopath in the very beginning was that rather than dealing with what he actually said, I chose to fill-in the blanks and reinterpret what I thought he said or meant to say. That is a very dangerous road to walk on. For instance, the spath I was involved with said if I wore black, which was his favorite color, he would rape me. That’s not something normal. But at the time, I reinterpreted that to mean that he loved me and really desired me and that we would make made passionate love. Later found out some things that make my skin crawl just to think about them. Suffice it to say, that now I make a conscious effort to not reinterpret what anyone says, but base my decisions on what they say or present.
So, I’m saying this with all due respect, my responses were directly based on what Steve had presented, which in my opinion was a very one-sided portrait he painted of what he personally perceived of God. There is a danger in doing that for all of us. No matter who the subject matter is. To begin attaching labels to anyone without complete, balanced information can lead to faulty conclusions.
That is my biggest issue. How can anyone of us come to any kind of rational, valid or sincere determination on the question without considering the FULL context of the behavior and the totality of any person, or as we have it, of God? The question, nor the resulting commentary, encourage the readers to consider God outside of the context in which the question was posed.
I state this not out of anger. I don’t have a problem with Steve or with anyone else for that matter. I am stating this just as a simple call to reasoning. I’m just saying that if I’m going to attach a label to ANYONE, let it be because of that person’s actions, not something that I have conjured up in my own head that is based on half a picture.
I’m sure if someone wrote down all my bad traits, with no redeeming qualities, I would look like a raving lunatic!! So I am certainly not prepared to judge anyone based on my own subjective standards, which would indicate bias and prejudice.
Wow, alot happens when your away for awile. Did anyone happen to read Steves last paragraph?
“I pose this as food for thought, nothing else.”
As Kim said this was to open up dialouge and not meant to offend anyone.
So this is why we don’t talk about politics or religious beliefs at dinner parties!
For what my 2 cents is worth I was raised Catholic. Catholic elementary school and Catholic high school. And an Irish Catholic family at home. I had my share of religion crammed into me to last a life time.
I questioned my religious “training” early on. As a teenager. My father claimed to be a devout catholic. He was also a drunk. And would come home drunk, often in a rage and create lots of havoc at home. He was not a nice man when he was drinking.
My mother was a good woman. And lived her life accordingly. I had noticed as a child, that she never took communion. As a teenager I found out that she had been married briefly and divorced. A no-no in the Catholic religion. She bowed her head when it was time to go up to the alter to recieve.
This bothered me that my father could recieve communion but my mother was forever “punished” because she had been divorced.
I started to notice that many devout catholics didn’t live their lives accordingly. And that going to church had absolutely nothing to do with being a good person. The church goers didn’t always apply the 10 commandments in their personal life. This was a big turn off to me as a teenager.
From that time on I challenged everything I had known that was taught to me in my Catholic upbringing. I didn’t buy into alot of it anymore as a young adult. Needless to say I am no longer catholic.
I am spiritual. I do believe that there is a power greater than myself. And I choose to call this higher power God. It all comes from within. And it is personal.
And I would no sooner try to push my beliefs on someone than I would expect them to push their beliefs onto me.
But when we die, and presuming if we even believe in heaven and hell….Are we going to be judged for our beliefs alone? Or judged by how we lived our lives?
I would like to believe that it would be more important how we live our lives.
And even in this dialouge here on LF, I see lots of disrespect for peoples beliefs and insulting peoples intelligence right and left. I don’t think that was Steves intentions.
Wikipedia definition: “Faith involves a concept of future events or outcomes, and is used conversely for a belief “not resting on logical proof or material evidence”
Certainly this thread was not meant to send anyone away from LF. We are all adults and we all know that their are people of many diverse beliefs here as anywhere else.
We all do know that we have free will. We can all believe what we believe. Its ok.
We can still come together and heal.