Joe Paterno, the legendary Penn State football coach, has died.
I can’t help but wonder if the travesty of the last few months, with his former assistant coach, Jerry Sandusky, being charged with sexually molesting 10 young boys over 15 years, killed him.
I’m not an alumna of Penn State. (I am, however, an alumna of Syracuse University, with its own scandal of an assistant basketball coach allegedly molesting boys.) Still, I hate to see the storied career of Joe Paterno forever blackened by the malevolent behavior of one man, if that proves to be the case.
Some people argue that Paterno had to know what was going on. They argue that Paterno was so concerned about his legacy, the reputation of his football program and Penn State University, that he was willing to turn a blind eye to the behavior of Jerry Sandusky.
I’m not so sure.
Since the scandal broke in November, Joe Paterno has given only one interview, to Sally Jenkins of the Washington Post. The story was published on January 14, 2012. It characterizes Joe Paterno as unable to comprehend what Sandusky may have done, because it was simply too foreign to the way Paterno himself lived his life. Jenkins writes:
He reiterated that McQueary was unclear with him about the nature of what he saw and added that even if McQueary had been more graphic, he’s not sure he would have comprehended it.
“You know, he didn’t want to get specific,” Paterno said. “And to be frank with you I don’t know that it would have done any good, because I never heard of, of, rape and a man. So I just did what I thought was best. I talked to people that I thought would be, if there was a problem, that would be following up on it.”
Is it possible to be that unaware of the existence of evil? Yes, it is, and we all know it.
While I was uninitiated, meaning, before my direct, personal encounter with a social predator, I never in my wildest dreams thought that I would cross paths with evil. I didn’t know that someone who appeared to be so loving and caring could have a hidden agenda. I lived a life of integrity, and I believed that the people who were part of my life were like me.
But, some may argue, sex abuse of children has been in the news for years—look at the stories about the Catholic Church. Well, my cousin was abused by priests. He received financial compensation many years ago—it was probably one of the first cases to be settled. I heard people in my family talking about it. Still, I did not comprehend what he must have experienced.
I didn’t understand the human capacity for manipulation and evil until it happened to me.
So, yes, I can believe that Joe Paterno was clueless. He grew up in a different era, when although the sexual abuse of children probably occurred, it certainly wasn’t talked about. He was inspired by his father. He believed in education. He believed in turning troubled athletes around. His whole life was about winning with integrity.
So for Paterno to realize, at this late stage of his life, that he may have been hoodwinked by someone so close to him must have been a terrible shock. It probably didn’t cause his lung cancer. But it may have sapped Paterno’s strength to fight it.
Read Joe Paterno’s last interview, on WashingtonPost.com.
My whole relationship was one of helping…
Travis, you’re welcome to try and help the ex spath in my life, but he’ll rape you, steal from you, give you an STD, lie to you constantly, destroy and abuse you in every possible way and then he’ll go get wasted while looking up child porn first. Oh, then he’ll blame you for all of it. Good luck.
My point being, the very reason I was victimized was because I thought I could help. I did not judge or condemn. I did more than anyone in his whole existence to reach him and support him. What I got in return was a look at evil. And no, I did NOT see myself in him.
BBE, yes, people in religious institutions (churches etc) are more likely to be conned by “forgiving” and “accepting” a person who says “I have sinned, but I’ve changed my ways” they want to “save souls” so they take people in who say they have repented at FACE VALUE…just “saying sorry” is enough to get the person accepted without any concern for whether or not the person is truly repenting or is just pretending.
Forgiving in my book does not mean to trust and does not mean absolve someone from the guilt that belongs to THEM.
We must look at a person in whole, not in part….and if someone has an addiction, be it to drugs, alcohol or perverted sex then if they say “I’m sorry, I have repented” we can accept that but we do not make them the sunday school superintendent or put them over the communion wine until they have been around a LONG time and been sober! LOL
I can’t judge a man’s heart, I can only go by how he/she presents themselves and by their ACTIONS and by observing them over a period of time
I can forgive them but want no relationship and give them no trust. But having no relationship and no trust, and then not wanting my “help” there is no way I can “help” them except by praying for them. But what that does for them is between them and God.
I like Marie have done things I knew were wrong at the time I did them. I did them anyway. MY CHOICE. MY guilt for doing so.
So I do not go along with “ignorance” being the cause of all sin or wrong doing. I also don’t think that people always do the best they can in a situation. I’m an example of people who don’t do the best they could have done because they were angry, or just felt lousy that day so did wrong and knew it was wrong. LOL
But I do realize that some people do things out of ignorance, but I think, frankly that is quite rare.
We cannot help someone who does not want to be helped….and
Oh My That’s one way to put it..
Donna,
You *must* be joking.
Have you ever looked into what people have to say about Paterno’s “Happy Valley?” It’s often compared, by its residents, as having been the victim of a cult of personality, lead by the narcissistic Paterno.
He was fired because he dared to challenge the authority of the Board of Trustees by trying to set the terms of his departure from the football program. In that nauseating statement he said he would spend the rest of his life helping the university. Did he even mention helping the children… you know, the ones who were shattered? Ah. No. It was all about him setting the terms and drawing the attention back to where he wanted it. He ordered that the Board of Trustees “should not spend a single minute discussing [my] status. They have far more important matters to address.”
Guess what, bud? His lousy leadership made this mess and daring to challenge authority in the midst of a scandal is the height of narcissism.
No made you king and public universities don’t work that way.
Except Penn State did for far too long. When they tried, desperately to fire him some years before, his power was too strong.
This was roughly the same time as some of the scandals happened. Do I think it’s possible that he kept a lid on “something of a sexual nature” towards “a child” and kept Sandusky around to keep things quiet? Yes. Because *no* sane non-sociopathic human being would tolerate “something of a sexual nature” towards a child in their workplace.
It’s kind of hard to be hoodwinked by a subordinate who travels with young children on his business trips, and sleeps in the same room as him. Did the boss have *no* sense of boundaries or propriety? And, there was a lengthy police investigation in 1998. There’s no way he could have missed that.
Was the subject to difficult for his sensitive aging ears? Then perhaps he should not have had the responsibilities he had. Children suffered because of his willful service to self.
I would suggest that such matters did not trouble his sensitive ears but rather titillated them. Recall that several years after this happened, he excused a player who had been accused of sexual assault by mocking the victim and claiming that women were flooding into players’ hotel rooms and he would point the way.
He put one of his own players into a key game after the player was suspended by the school for a sexual assault. When this kind of thing happens at other universities, there is an enormous uproar because playing ball is a privilege and its one reserved for students. Not on Peterno’s campus where he told people that it was “nobody’s business but mine” who played. Ahem? Seriously? At a public university? He seriously needed to get over himself but did not.
Between 2002 and 2008, 27 (TWENTY SEVEN) Penn State players were found guilty of crimes.
Paterno created and commanded Penn State’s most valuable asset. As the leader of that organization he ignored a potentially (and, as it turns out, true) horrific situation. He sacrificed innocent children. His organization was one where where evil was allowed to flourish.
He was viewed as a favored sons, felt he could call the shots without fear of the consequences, and he was blind to his moral responsibilities as a leader.
Before this came to light, he had been described by former assistant coaches as controlling, vindictive, and demanding complete devotion to his program.
I have worked at several public universities and have been in the upper levels of administration in two of them. I can assure you that a common guideline is “avoid the appearance of impropriety.”
Paterno doesn’t seem to have cared a bit about such niceties.
Rather than weep teers for an ass, consider what happened to Vickey Triponey at Penn State and salute the courage of whistleblowers everywhere.
We have a responsibility to act civilized and to expect that others do as well. It trumps everything else, even one’s most precious world views.
I just watched him on the video. He does not appear to have a great deal of remorse. He seems to be in denial and probably didn’t want to rock any boats at this time in his life. A really truly decent person would feel horrible that they didn’t do more.
It is truly mind-boggling that any adult would not be alarmed at another adult traveling with young boys and sleeping in the same room as them.
Even more mind-boogling is that it happened in what is general a homophobic environment. I can’t believe Paterno did not find Sandusky’s actions “queer.”
whatevs,
thank you for your post, you brought up most of the relevant issues concisely. Especially Vicky.
The problem with believing Paterno didn’t know, is that it puts us back into the position that brought us to LF in the first place: believing that everyone is as innocent and naive as we were.
This is why we believed the spath was just “thoughtless”, because we keep trying to project our own way of thinking onto everyone else. Haven’t we learned by NOW that there are selfish people who will do anything to get their way?
Paterno may not have been a spath, but he had his agenda: Football at Penn State and his legacy there. He will say anything to protect that. And he’s a terrible liar. He said he knew very little about Sandusky because they were very different ages. Paterno 85, Sandusky 68. HUGE DIFFERENCE – NOT!
His lies continue from there. His life has been about a GAME. That really speaks to someone who never grew up.
This is the kind of thing that attorneys use all the time when defending drunk drivers. In order to win the jury’s sympathy, they will bring out the “There but for the grace of God, go you and I” defense. How can you argue against that?
Choice. At age 85, he’s had many opportunities to accept the grace of God and make the right choice to grow up. I thank God that He gave me a spath that scared the crap out of me and forced me to grow up – before I was on my death bed.
I have seen photos with paterno’s arms around sandusky, in a friendly embrace – I dont think paterno was to upset about sandusky’s behavior..
Travis;
Um……REALLY?
“I believe that people do the very best they can given their level of consciousness and circumstances at any given time. This includes my father.”
So the very best your father could do was murder folks……
I don’t know what cult you learned that information in……but I suggest you step away from the Kool aid!
I don’t see my former husband as doing the very best he could with his level of consciousness or anything else……he conned each step of the way. He hurt people each step of the way……
Same with my bus. spaths……
We are ALL capable of better…..IF WE CHOOSE! Some don’t choose to adhere to the right is right wrong is wrong concept…..or, it’s all about me and what I can take, take, take.
I was abused and raped and molested…..and I didn’t do anything such as this to my own children or anyone else on earth…..human, animal or plant…..I have a choice! I chose to NOT continue the cycle of abuse…
My choice was made because I knew what it felt like and i wouldn’t want another to live with what I have! I chose!
Your father CHOSE. My spath chose…….
I refuse to look past evil and see only good in others….I believe it’s one of the qualities spaths look for to exploit. I see it regularly….and it sickens me!
I DO see good in people around me, I live a life I’m proud of and do good in others day to day life……I do trust some people and know there are plenty of trustworthy folks around….I am one of them…..
BUT….I also know just as theri are trustworthy’s…..there are untrustworthies……and GOD sure in hell ain’t gonna sit my ass down and point em out each time.
That’s UP TO ME and my awareness!
I have no issues condemning someone for such horrid actions……I have a problem with the bible about judgement etc…..If you do condemning actions….your gonna get condemned by EB!
Meanwhile…..we can continue to live a good life we can be proud of…….present and future!!!