Editor’s note: The following was written by the Lovefraud reader “Rochelle.”
As part of the problem with my particular sociopath, the way they interpret behaviors is not like the rest of us. I have a list of examples:
What you do or say and what the sociopath hears
Expressing an opinion or feeling = ranting and anger issues.
Getting angry when he belittles and talks down to me = raging and anger issues.
Doing things for my husband and stepdaughter = I must have an ulterior motive.
Saying I like something in a shop window or magazine = me trying to manipulate him into buying me something.
Crying because I am hurting = drama queen.
Me asking him not to bring up a topic while out with friends = me being controlling.
Taking my husband to the hospital after he filed for divorce behind my back and then taking care of him afterward = me trying to get a better settlement out of him.
Changing my mind on something = hypocrisy.
His unfriending his sisters on Facebook = I can’t stand to hear that I am wrong and will give up my sisters to prove my point.
His being married 4 times = he made the wrong choices and did nothing wrong.
Having a female coworker as his best friend instead of his wife = this woman means more to me than you do.
Direct depositing my own money into my own account = stealing.
Going away for a family wedding and not staying at the hotel with the family because he SWORE I was there = paranoia. I was in another state the entire time.
Not doing things exactly the way he would = me being wrong.
Not liking being controlled by him his female coworker = me being wrong.
Me wanting sex once a week = me being a nymphomaniac.
Me buying a sandwich for lunch = me overspending.
Me loving my husband, washing his clothes, cleaning his house, cooking his meals, being supportive in all aspects of his life = I am beneath him and him not having the ability to show how appreciative he is.
dorothy2
It’s like they think that just because they say it, that its true and are offended because we don’t believe them!
Spath:How dare you not believe my lies and contradictions. None of my buddies at the bar question what I tell them! I can tell them whatever I want about myself and my past and THEY believe me!! What is WRONG with YOU?? You believed me when I met you! = I’m SUCH a Spathtard
as- hole.
Tea Light
Idea. Oxy and Truthy coauthor a practical guide to recovery from disordered personalities. That way, I can stop cutting and pasting free top-notch advice for my recovery file, Truthy gets some moolah for that trip to England and Oxy gets some moolah for books and the animals etc. I’d buy it. Bet loads of us would.
Radar_On
Mich0101, know how you feel. Not that long ago i told the slime-ball in a fit of absolute rage, that “for the rest of my life, i cant take enough showers to wash the FILTH of you off of me!” Aghhhhh! I sooooo mean that! The thought of ever having sex with anyone, ever…just turns my stomach! His lofty ego didnt permit my comment to penetrate his mask! Besides, lol! His machismo wont accept the 3 min. man, sucks at sex! Even with his “niagra”! LOLOL! What a pisa sh*t!!!!
dorothy2
Mich, hang in there. It is nasty vile stuff. It just does not come off. Be vigilant and don’t get yourself into a situation that will add another layer. This is the best place in the universe to get support and validation. No one understands like the folks on LoveFraud, 180 Rule and such. No one CAN unless they have been slimed themselves. It’s impossible.
Stay tough!
dorothy2
Radar……” Niagra ” ……good one!!
mich0101
LF has been the most helpful to me so far. None of my family or friends can relate. Thanks for all your support.
Tea Light
Mich, hang in there kiddo, be strong x
Dot2, I visited the site you mention once. There were 2 very offensive and unchallenged homophobic statements there that I saw. One from someone who seems to be the main commenter and another in an article on autism which had been posted under info on psychopathy, which I found ignorant and offensive. I won’t be going back.
dorothy2
TeaLight….which site was it?
Tea Light
The one you mention above which is not LoveFraud, dot2. 180rule. Skylar’s site.
dorothy2
Oh, I’m not sure which comments you are referring to or the context. Sorry you were offended. They have been very supportive and informative to me, that’s all I can attest to. 🙂