Editor’s note: Lovefraud honors all religious and spiritual beliefs. However, we’ve heard of many sociopaths who twist the teachings of the Bible in order to keep victims from escaping exploitation.
A reader sent the following letter in order to encourage those who are in this situation—knowing they are being abused, but being told that Scripture says they should put up with it. The reader has no affiliation with the organizations posting the material; she just thought the links were helpful.
For those individuals who are of the Christian faith (and / or of any faith) and who have, also unfortunately found themselves ”¨exposed to either sociopaths / the supporters-of-sociopaths ”¨(within their very own family or spiritual setting or, as is very ”¨often the case, both) the following links may be of some ”¨help in discovering and receiving Biblical “support” in ”¨being able to acknowledge the God-given FACT that ”¨”tolerating a sociopath’s abuse” is very simply ”¦
1) NOT part of a Christians’ “bearing one’s cross”;
2) NOT something that a Christian MUST simply ”¨”just forgive and forget” in order to have God ”¨also “forgive and forget” their own wrongs;
3) NOT merely a part of a Christians’ spiritual ”¨OBLIGATION to “turn their other cheek” (70 x 7)
4) NOT a part of “loving or ‘blessing’ one’s enemies”;
5) NOT something that in anyway “glorifies” or “honors” God, ”¨nor is it in anyway a type of “obedience” to the commandments ”¨left by God to all of mankind, nor does it follow along the ”¨lines of the “will” that God has planned for one’s life.
God has a GOOD will and plan for everyone’s life and God both can and will help people to escape, overcome, heal and even, somehow, also ”¨be able to learn from the abusive experiences that you have survived.
GOD HAS THE POWER AND THE WILL to, somehow or another, use ”¨these past experiences to “transform” a person (despite all the abuse) ”¨into becoming the very best person that they can become (to themselves”¨ and to others) and can actually somehow miraculously also use these ”¨experiences to work out all together for the GOOD within their own ”¨life (Romans 8:28; Jeremiah29:11; 3 John 1:2) and in the lives of others.
Should I offer forgiveness without repentance?
Should forgiveness be unconditional?
No forgiveness for the unrepentant
Selective Amnesia: “I have no idea what I did wrong!”
Forgiveness—does it matter if the abuser is a born-again Christian?
Its between two school Elon University in North Carolina and University of Maryland Eastern Shore. I want to study social work and special education. But I do wish that they did have license for parenting. Poor child, your sister’s son!
Hey Erin…
Yep, it all has to do with our childhood.
My daughter is loving doing this film. We are hanging out with students in the NYU film school. Its an experience.
The film is a story of a young girl who is “obsessed” with an astronuat.
Funny, but most “stories” are all about deception, lies, betrayal…and expoloitation…especially soap operas.
We are actually in Brooklyn. My daughter is getting exposure to “college life”. They are making paninis for dinner now…
So..its a new experience. We will be leaving here after midnite..and driving to No. Jersey…to stay at my g/f’s house tonite…sneaking in around 2am lol
Then tomorrow nite is from 6-3pm. The film is called Moonlove. Hmm…
Anyway, Erin…nothing ever stays the same in life..its always changing…and just as the devil entered and exited your life…there will be new people in your life….
There’s a time for everything…and right now we are going through a time to look inside of ourselves….and try to understand ourselves better so that we can have better and happier relationships.
You should come out and visit us sometime…we can do the NY thing!!!
hurtnomore-that sounds really great and those are GREAT things to study. We need people who are good in those areas. I heard that there is such a shortage of social workers.
My sister’s kids are precious but they would be SO much better off with their father.
Erin- I heard, too! But yeah that’s the plan. I’m gonna pray so hard that they go live with their dad. I think being a social worker is a good job for me to pursue because I have a HUGE heart for the abused, foster kids, the unloved, mentally challenged, homeless, and people of that same nature. It kills me that children are often put in the middle or thrown out because their parents can’t do their jobs. Most times kids are so helpless and innocent.
tobe-I hope to get there eventually. I want to see everything.
I really wish those books would get here. Matt told me about another one about controlling parents. I will have to get that one too.
I know that from now on, I am always going to do what Erin wants to do and it doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks about it. My dad was so ANTI-me being a cop when I was younger. The ex s’path encouraged me to follow that dream and that is the GOOD THING that came out of our r/s and me quitting smoking. Yesterday was my 2 yr NON SMOKING anniversary. I quit right before we got together cuz i knew he wouldn’t date me if I smoked. I wanted to quit for myself too, but it was easier knowing that he wanted it. That is another GOOD THING about the r/s. I’m sure that he thinks I went back to smoking when he discarded me. He even told me when he was leaving-“I guess you’ll probably start smoking again now”-wrong douchebag. I am STILL smoke free and won’t be anywhere near it cuz it makes me sick!
I was even crying over the plans that I had that got away from me because I was too busy “people-pleasing”. I was trying to go in the Marines after high school. They called me almost everyday but Dad wouldn’t sign me away cuz I was 17. I should have dropped my classes and ran as soon as I turned 18 but I was afraid of Dad’s control. I would have served in Desert Storm and come home to move to NYC and be NYPD and go to John Jay College of Criminal Justice. That’s what I wanted. I would have my doctorate by now and be rank as well.
Boy do we waste our time worrying about this other people instead of worrying about Erin and tobe. It’s all about us now. I am going on the Adkin’s Diet on Sunday. I have to get the best Erin back now. When I go back to that academy, I want those instructor’s jaws to drop when I walk in.
I am hopefully soon going to get a new bike and order the DVD’s for close combat training and maybe take Thai boxing. I want to be S.O.D after I am an officer for a few years. I want to be a sniper/hostage negotiator. I’m going to get pink boxing gloves!!!
hurtnomore-you are EXACTLY what kind of person that is needed for that job. I have worked with social workers in my current field and will also work with them when I’m a cop. Everytime you get mad at your parents, just think how soon you will be getting away to go to school. I would be marking the days off on a calendar. Time will fly by.
Erin- thanks for the advice! Trust a child when he/ she tells you that his or her dad beat mom up! You would make a great cop! I think. Then you could really influence society. Putting those cruel and unjust people behind bars! I could see it! Erin being a cop! Stopping those criminals! Sounds ideal!
hurtnomore-thanks so much. It has been my true calling my whole life. The problem we have to deal with though is the public’s distrust of police-especially where I live! I’m going to definitely make an influence. I would love to be the first female Police Superintendent here-although my Captain will probably beat me to it. She is freakin brilliant. She is ten years older than me and we are SO much alike and we look so much alike that it freaks people out!!
Erin- Haha lol… That would be cool. But yeah a lot of people I know hate policemen. but there are good policemen as well as bad ones. Unfortunately, bad ones overshadow the good ones out there. But I think if you guys find people that are like the people in the neighborhood it will help a little. Also, some people feel that because they lack an education people especially police won’t listen to them. But you gotta hear both sides and really listen to them. People like to be heard and need it! Some African Americans feel that all white policemen or woman are racist. But that is not the case! Not all arrest you cause you are black and fit the description of the suspect. Oh he’s black he must steal arrest him! That’s a stereotype!
We need more cops with your perspective….my long term goal is to start a foundation for women that have been “duped” by a “player” ie a spath