Editor’s note: Lovefraud honors all religious and spiritual beliefs. However, we’ve heard of many sociopaths who twist the teachings of the Bible in order to keep victims from escaping exploitation.
A reader sent the following letter in order to encourage those who are in this situation—knowing they are being abused, but being told that Scripture says they should put up with it. The reader has no affiliation with the organizations posting the material; she just thought the links were helpful.
For those individuals who are of the Christian faith (and / or of any faith) and who have, also unfortunately found themselves ”¨exposed to either sociopaths / the supporters-of-sociopaths ”¨(within their very own family or spiritual setting or, as is very ”¨often the case, both) the following links may be of some ”¨help in discovering and receiving Biblical “support” in ”¨being able to acknowledge the God-given FACT that ”¨”tolerating a sociopath’s abuse” is very simply ”¦
1) NOT part of a Christians’ “bearing one’s cross”;
2) NOT something that a Christian MUST simply ”¨”just forgive and forget” in order to have God ”¨also “forgive and forget” their own wrongs;
3) NOT merely a part of a Christians’ spiritual ”¨OBLIGATION to “turn their other cheek” (70 x 7)
4) NOT a part of “loving or ‘blessing’ one’s enemies”;
5) NOT something that in anyway “glorifies” or “honors” God, ”¨nor is it in anyway a type of “obedience” to the commandments ”¨left by God to all of mankind, nor does it follow along the ”¨lines of the “will” that God has planned for one’s life.
God has a GOOD will and plan for everyone’s life and God both can and will help people to escape, overcome, heal and even, somehow, also ”¨be able to learn from the abusive experiences that you have survived.
GOD HAS THE POWER AND THE WILL to, somehow or another, use ”¨these past experiences to “transform” a person (despite all the abuse) ”¨into becoming the very best person that they can become (to themselves”¨ and to others) and can actually somehow miraculously also use these ”¨experiences to work out all together for the GOOD within their own ”¨life (Romans 8:28; Jeremiah29:11; 3 John 1:2) and in the lives of others.
Should I offer forgiveness without repentance?
Should forgiveness be unconditional?
No forgiveness for the unrepentant
Selective Amnesia: “I have no idea what I did wrong!”
Forgiveness—does it matter if the abuser is a born-again Christian?
The Christian abuser—twisting God’s word to justify abuse
What about “Love your enemies?”
one/joy_step_at_a_time
star the ‘right on’ was about moving on, not your lightweight status as a boozer.
Stargazer
The part that made me angry was that he continued to post on my favorite forum. That forum is a family to me, and it would have killed me to leave if my friends (and maybe the army) hadn’t driven him off. But if I had to, I would have left the forum and found another social group. I would never have let that creep destroy me.
one/joy_step_at_a_time
star – i had to leave a website, a community i very much wanted to stay a part of – because of the spath. i actually think i may be able to go back there some day.
Stargazer
Wit, I wouldn’t know (about the money thing) because I’ve never really had too much of it except for my brief stint as a stripper (another story for another time). But I believe it is possible to have money and not have your life ruined by it. But having said that, my “dreams” are not specifically about money. They are about the type of home I want to live in and the type of people I want to have in my life, the desire to travel, etc. I’m hoping that as I move towards those things, the money will just manifest.
one/joy_step_at_a_time
thank you all SO MUCH! it’s been an odd night, and getting to play and joke is so empowering for me. it’s taken the REALLY ANGRY and a bit crazed of earlier and smoothed it and made it what it should be – celebratory.
one/joy_step_at_a_time
star -inappropriate question coming…
did you have our snakes when you were dancing?
Stargazer
“star the ’right on’ was about moving on, not your lightweight status as a boozer.”
I knew that. 🙂
“star ”“ i had to leave a website, a community i very much wanted to stay a part of ”“ because of the spath. i actually think i may be able to go back there some day.”
You know, I told myself that if I ever had to give up my site, I’d find something better to spend my time on. I refuse to let him bring me down. If he ever comes back to my site, I’ll feel GRATITUDE that I now have an excuse to break my internet addiction and get more involved in the real world.
Stargazer
“star -inappropriate question coming”
did you have our snakes when you were dancing?”
No, I discovered snakes much later in life.
conomo
I guess y’ll call me a heavy weight….but I am such sweetheart!!!! Prolly like you have never met!! Ouu …..I am not usually this bold…y’lllll no why
one/joy_step_at_a_time
gotcha!
lovefraud isn’t helping with mine – that’s for sure.
i feel such a need to be somewhere where i can just say stuff about the spath still.
bday party a bit ago and only made 2 SPATH references. i am certain my friends were relieved. sometimes i am very frustrated with them – they don’t get it and don’t want to.