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Lovefraud Lesson #10: Sociopaths always blame others

You are here: Home / Book reviews / Lovefraud Lesson #10: Sociopaths always blame others

September 7, 2012 //  by Donna Andersen//  132 Comments

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When sociopaths have problems in their lives, it’s never their own fault. Donna Andersen explains why this is one of the most important Red Flags of Lovefraud.

To watch the entire Lovefraud Lessons series, go the the Lovefraud Videos page.

[youtube_sc url=http://youtu.be/kL24yoR2H2M]

Category: Book reviews, Explaining the sociopath

Previous Post: « Finding meaning in life from tragedy
Next Post: Parenting at-risk teens and young adults »

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Comments

  1. spoon

    September 15, 2012 at 11:16 pm

    Dupey

    Your not a SURVIVOR. Your kickin butt. That’s a whole lot more then a SURVIVOR.

    XXOO

    SPOOOOOOOOOOOOOON

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  2. spoon

    September 15, 2012 at 11:18 pm

    Forgot

    “fixing the problem doesn’t work”

    T

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  3. Truthspeak

    September 16, 2012 at 8:06 am

    Dupey, it’s so good to read your strength and determination! GOOD FOR YOU!!!!!

    Brightest blessings

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  4. darwinsmom

    September 16, 2012 at 10:01 am

    Dupey,

    I’m so glad that you are finding peace now that you changed your phone number. Finally you can focus on yourself, instead of watching who and when they call to stalk you! TOWANDA!

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  5. Back_from_the_edge

    September 16, 2012 at 11:33 am

    spoon? ‘fixing the problem doesn’t work’?
    exploding smurf time, then. hehehehe

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  6. Back_from_the_edge

    September 16, 2012 at 11:35 am

    Truthspeak: So nice to read you.
    I think of you often and always send prayers your way. xxoo

    Thank you for your ‘inspiration’ on this day.
    It means a lot to me.

    I pray you are doing much better these days.
    Determined is certainly what I am, Dear Friend.

    Love ~ Dupey

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  7. Back_from_the_edge

    September 16, 2012 at 12:01 pm

    darwinsmom: Thank you for your post. xxoo
    Oh yes, that telephone/cyber stalking is like a slow reacting poison.
    Just like everything else about them. It’s difficult tainting your own point of view about a person when you still have feelings for them in a sick, twisted, sort of way. I am not even sure I understand it myself anymore. But, what I DO understand is this: “I” am not going to end up being a murder victim of psychopath. I do know that.

    It has been so very quiet the past couple of weeks since I changed my phone number. You can really notice the stalking once you change your number – INSTANTLY: complete silence and peace. I love it so much. I feel like a person who has gotten ran over by a semi truck, picked up, dusted off, put back on my feet and told: ‘go for it’. Yah, right: it’s a healing process just like with a physical injury. For me, since my heart attack, I have had a double ‘healing’ going on simultaneously: healing my body and also healing my mind.
    The ‘invisible’ ailments are sometimes the most difficult.

    I am healing well in the peace and quiet.
    I absolutely do believe I would not have my life, this very moment, had I not put an end, once and for all, to the craziness.

    The only avenue left for “IT” would be to show up here, out of no where, which was usually the way it worked with him. Leaving things on my door step, for years….just wild, crazy, stalker kind of things.

    IF “IT” shows up on my door, that will be strike #3. Hallelujah!!!!!
    Bomb threats aren’t taken lightly these days….and, “I” am not the only ‘target’..

    It was MY FAULT for opening the door and inviting the devil in.

    I NEVER want that ugliness near me, not ever again.
    If it continues to BOTHER ME: I will make waves. I mean what I say and I think “IT” knows it now. I win. Period. MY LIFE not YOURS.
    GO AWAY: take the freedom that I allow you to have at this point in your life and just GO AWAY. I don’t even care if “IT” DOES anything about itself – I just want it to go away now. There is nothing left.

    I am starting to live MY LIFE.
    Focusing on myself is something I haven’t had the luxury of doing in a very long time. Some times I am ‘lost’ but, I find my way. Slowly and gently. It’s not easy coming out of psychological captivity. It has been difficult reintegrating myself back into life after such a deep abuse. I am stronger than “IT” though and I will eventually come out of this.

    I almost already have.
    The scars will linger for the rest of my life but it will not take my life for me nor shall it ever win. “I” am the winner. The ‘ass kicker’. hahahaha
    NOT the other way around.

    mwah!!!!
    Happy Sunday.

    Hope you are well and doing okay darwinsmom.
    I think of you often and am grateful for your strength and encouragement.

    Have a happy day; okay?

    Love ~ Dupey

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  8. kim frederick

    September 16, 2012 at 12:26 pm

    Dupey, I felt a physical response in my stomache when I read what you wrote about resolution with a spath entanglement….the best you can do is trash it. Oh Yeah.
    That is all there is! Really, nothing more. But, after all the psychological abuse, after all the tacticts straight out of the spath play-book, such as blame-shifting, gas-lighting, triangulation, bullying, undermining, lying, feigning remorse, breaking promises…..Oh, Good Lord. I could go on and on. Yes….the only resolution is trashing them as worthless junk, then walking away and never giving it another thought,

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  9. kim frederick

    September 16, 2012 at 12:37 pm

    On the heels of my last post, I thought of this:
    If it’s all about power, to the spath, then it’s all about disempowering the spath…..disempowering the spath over us. Isn’t that what recovery is all about? How on earth did the spath grow in such proportions to completely take us over? To become this life or death issue that has the power to make or break us….ruin a day, or a life?
    It really is about deminishing them. Sucking the power right out of them and back into ourselves. It isn’t just acting as if……it’s a mind set. It’s making them insignificant, a peice of trash…a blood sucking bug, nothing much, just a nuisance…..walking away from the trash can while you brush the crumbs from your hands. OVER. DONE. Hasta la bye-bye.

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  10. Ox Drover

    September 16, 2012 at 1:53 pm

    “hasta la bye-bye”

    Kim, I didn’t know you were bi-lingual. LOL

    Log in to Reply
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