Who Do You See in the Mirror?

Editor’s note: Liberty Forrest, author of several self-help books and a certified Law of Attraction Life Coach, asks, who do you see in the mirror? Someone you’ve been conditioned to see — or your true essence? Read more about Liberty.

By Liberty Forrest

I’m gonna ask you a question now. And I want you to be reeeeeally honest with your answer, okay?

I don’t want you to read beyond the question until you’ve taken a moment and answered it because I really want you to think about it. Ready? Okay, here goes:

Who do you see when you look in a mirror?

Stop for a moment and take in that question…This can be a revealing and powerful little exercise if you give yourself a moment to allow it to work its magic.

I wonder how you replied. Sadly, most people answer that question in a negative way.

We’re so quick to do ourselves down, to see our flaws, or what we perceive as flaws, especially in a physical way – when looking in the mirror. And especially after having dealt with sociopaths. They’ve made sure to point out anything and everything they don’t like about us. And we’ve made sure to believe them.

And worse, we forget who we are on the inside. We forget the beautiful Spirits that reside inside the vessels that carry them and that allow them to experience all aspects of life in the earthly realm.

What’s With Not Liking Mirrors?

Many people don’t even like mirrors, and don’t like to see themselves at all. And it’s actually got much less to do with physical appearance than they might first think. It’s because they just generally don’t like themselves as people. Self-esteem is lacking, and they’re quick to criticise; they see only what they think is wrong with them or what’s missing, and more often than not, those painful beliefs have come from the hurtful opinions of others, and from our society in general. And the worst damage of all comes from sociopaths.

Our culture places too much emphasis on physical appearance, and sometimes sociopaths delight in quietly (or not so quietly) insulting others. They’re only too happy to offer comments about how others look, sometimes behind a smile and said in a way that makes it sound like they actually care and are trying to be helpful. It’s that charming, manipulative quality that we aren’t aware of, and that pulls us in, allowing us to believe what sociopaths say, and believing that it’s “for our own good.”

Read more: Recovery from a sociopath — give yourself time and distance

Plastic surgeons and cosmetologists love our obsession with looks, and our fear of aging. There are even reality TV shows about people who hate the way they look, and they go off for a few months and have plastic surgeries and terrible procedures, and awful things done to their teeth.

They have facial bones broken, jaws wired shut, fillers injected here and there, implants of boobs or hair, fat sucked out, skin lopped off, they are lifted, tucked, tightened, snipped, reduced, enlarged, lasered, dyed, firmed, chemically peeled, blah blah blahed, all in the name of physical beauty.

Manufactured Perfection Doesn’t Count

And then they return to a gathering of loved ones who are eagerly waiting to see the New and Improved Versions of the formerly ugly ducklings. There are grand entrances with The Reveal, as it is called, showing off all they’ve been through surgically, chemically, and procedurally before being stuffed into the perfect gowns or suits, having their hair perfectly coiffed, their make-up perfectly applied.

So with all this fake, artificial, superficial, surgically altered stuff that was done, and a look at the before and after shots, we’re supposed to admire their incredible beauty. But really, we are admiring the work of the surgeons who lifted, tucked, removed, enlarged, enhanced etc., and the eye specialists who lasered away the “four-eyes” glasses, and the dentists who did heaven-knows-what filing, drilling, refitting or building that was necessary to create the perfect smile.

We’re admiring the work of the hairstylists who added fake extensions to produce long, flowing locks on short, unfeminine hair. We’re admiring the work of the “make-up artists” — an all-too-honest term, really, as it is like painting a portrait on a blank canvas; with some skill, you can make a person look like someone else entirely …

But underneath all that great work that the professionals did, there will still be the little fat kid with the Coke-bottle glasses who was relentlessly picked on, or the skinny flat-chested gawky girl whose only noticeable protrusion was Grandpa Walter’s honking big beak of a nose. No scalpel or chemical or bit of silicone or collagen could ever heal those scars, and no make-up brush can reach them and cover them either.

And sociopaths are only too quick to pick on us, whether with subtlety or overtly, and point out these many “flaws” in an effort to keep us weak and under their control. The more involved you are with sociopaths, the deeper these scars can run.

The Good News: You Can Heal the Damage

The only way to heal those emotional wounds is to elevate yourself from the human experience and remember that you are really pure and perfect Spirit. If you look in the mirror and all you see are your perfectly imperfect human flaws, both inside and out, then you’re missing a glorious sight, for there is nothing more beautiful or more perfect than your Spirit. It is flawless, shimmering, radiant, glowing, magical, compassionate. It is love in its purest, highest, most perfect form.

If this is not who you see when you look in the mirror, you’re only adding to the scars that already exist on your soul because you’re missing the point of being here. You’re missing the beauty that you — and only you — can add to the world. And as long as you’re not able to see that beauty, the sociopath has won.

Do yourself a favour. Take a look in the mirror. Look at yourself for a few minutes. Yes, really. A few minutes. And yes, it is doing yourself a favour because I want you to get past Grandpa Walter’s beak or your chubby cheeks or your bumpy skin or crooked teeth — or anything else you don’t like about your appearance. I want you to get past the emotional wounds that have shredded your self-esteem and left you feeling worthless or unimportant. I want you to take back the power that the sociopath took from you and that you gave up because you didn’t know any better.

Learn more: Self-care for survivors

I want you to look past Everything Human. I want you to connect with that pure and perfect Spirit that resides behind those eyes, the Spirit that expresses itself in your many qualities, your gifts, your talents and abilities, in everything that is good and beautiful and Divine. And once you’ve really made that connection, you will see how very much about you there is to love. It won’t matter what the vessel looks like, how it dresses or how much plastic surgery it has had or has thought about having. The emotional wounds that have been inflicted upon your humanness will begin to heal.

Who do you see when you look in the mirror? When you can finally see past Everything Human, you will see who you really are. And what a glorious sight that will be.

This article was originally published at LibertyForrest.com. Reprinted with permission from the author.