By | October 8, 2010 31 Comments

Psychopaths as “snake oil salesmen”

By Ox Drover

The other night my son and  I went to a rodeo with a a couple who are our friends to watch another friend ride in the rodeo roping contest.

My friend is currently somewhat “down in her back” and will be going to a neurosurgeon for treatment this coming week. When we got up to go to the concession stand she asked me to go over and talk to this man who was selling some “pain relief patches.” She wondered if they would help.

We walked toward the man’s stand, where he had a sophisticated electronic display up and pamphlets to hand out. He immediately started his spiel and he started with the bouncing four-month old border collie pup I was holding on the end of a leash. “Do you want me to calm that puppy down? Here, let me put these on her face.” He reached down and took a couple of peel-and-stick patches, one on each side of her face, which of course did nothing to calm down the bored pup who wanted off the leash to go sniff and smell all the new and exciting things.

Then he started working on selling my friend this “new and exciting, scientifically proven” patch that she could put even on top of her clothing and it was guaranteed by “double blind studies” to raise the level of some “hormone” in her blood that would fix her pain in no time!

She looked at me and said “What do you think about this?” Well, being a medical practitioner (retired) I do “believe in” the placebo effect helping some ailments, and I do believe in some “alternative” therapies which are being recognized in real-double blind studies as helpful for various things, but what I do not “believe in” is “snake-oil salesmen.”

First , even if applying these patches to the skin would “raise the level of X hormone” (one I had never heard of by the way) in your blood, where is the evidence that that hormone would relieve your pain, or that it was safe for you? I remember back when I was a child they would X-ray our feet when we bought a new pair of shoes to make sure they fit and didn’t warp our feet. Well, obviously they stopped that practice because there are definite negative side effects of X-rays, and using them to size shoes correctly isn’t enough of a benefit to offset the negative effects of too much radiation on a kid.

Secondly, I saw no way that these patches, applied over the clothing, could have any effect on the hormonal level of the body, of either dog, horse or human.

He was giving a rapid fire speech on how these patches would eliminate my friend’s pain from her severely  pinched nerve (which will require surgery to correct and is scheduled for next week). I know my friend truly dreads the upcoming surgery (I’ve had that same surgery) and the associated pain from the surgery and the recovery, and she would love to grasp at any straw that she thought for even one second might give her some relief from the severe pain and disability she is having from the problem.

She looked over at me and I lip read her say, “What do you think?” I shook my head to indicate to her that I wasn’t buying a single thing he said as anything close to “scientific” or “double-blind” or pain relief. Then I turned to the salesman (one of the most pushy I have encountered) and said, “You know, if you are going to sell snake oil, you aren’t dressed properly, you need a black tuxedo and a top hat.”

The man was somewhat startled by my snotty remark, I think. He stopped in mid-sentence and said. “I resent that remark; I am offended.”

I replied, “Well, good, I actually intended to offend you.” His face looked almost like I had hit it with a bucket of cold water, because he was surely not expecting me to say this. I think he probably thought I would become defensive and say something like, “Oh, I didn’t mean to offend you, I was just joking.”

But I meant what I said. He was a “snake oil” salesman preying on people who are in pain, people who want an “easy answer” to their pain. To stop the pain they can’t control.

Psychopaths, just like this pushy salesman, seem to offer us this “guaranteed” and “proven easy way to fix our life’s pain.” They will offer us “surefire love” to make us feel better and immediately cure our loneliness. They will hold out to us the prospect of all our dreams of life coming true just like a fairy tale. There will be no pain in life, and they will take care of us.

Unfortunately, just like there is no peel-and-stick patch that you can put on your puppy to make it calm, or put on top of your clothing to cure your herniated disk pain, or no special cream that will get rid of your wrinkles and make you look 20 again, or a special pill that will let you eat all the junk food you want and still lose weight 15 pounds a week ”¦ there is no other person who can cure all your ills, make you happy, and keep you from being insecure or lonely.

Back when I was in family medical practice, people would come to me for diabetic teaching and many didn’t want to hear what I had to tell them, because there is no amount of medication, either oral or injectable, that can control diabetes and let you “eat what you want when you want it.” Caring for diabetes  is a combination of  diet and exercise at prescribed times in prescribed amounts, and/or medication. There is no easy way out. Yet, just today on a website I saw an advertisement for a web site that guaranteed to “cure diabetes in 30 days.” Gosh, I wonder why the American Diabetes Association doesn’t know about this remarkable “cure?” Maybe I should call them and inform them about it.

Psychopaths take advantage of our desires for an “easy fix” in selling us the modern day equivalents of “snake oil,” whether it is getting us to invest our money in their business schemes, or to buy patches for pain relief, or to give them our hearts and love. None of their plans work out for our benefit though.

So, bottom line, “if it sounds too good to be true, it is too good to be true.” BUYER BEWARE. Not all snake oil salesmen wear a top hat and black tuxedo!

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Hey Oxy…very interesting…very applicable advice…this is a great forewarning we’d all benefit from heeding!


Good article……..Love the backspath!!!

Snake oil is always VENEMOUS, and so are the salesmen.


I’m sorry I missed being THERE for the moment. I’d probrably have snarfed involuntarily.

Snake oil. Spot on.

To be able to convince anyone to believe what is unbelieveable is a gift of gab for sure. And were it possible to harness, these disordered could be very productive.

But that is kind of like thinking that fast growing eucalyptus trees would make good railroad lumber. It didn’t work because the wood just grew up too twisted to be useable.

And that, is another way of saying the same thing you just did.

Bravissimo Ox!

All the best,

Ox Drover

Thanks guys, that snake oil salesman out there taking money off the unsuspecting people who want relief from their pain just made me madder’n hell! His ploy to “train my dog” with the patches was really a good one Too! Gosh! LOL And my friend is no dummy either, but people will just want to “believe” anything to make them FEEL better! Hoping for a miracle.

BTW she’s had her medical treatment, it was a spinal injection to see if that helps and I spent most of the day with her yesterday and she is MUCH IMPROVED! So hopefully, the cutting surgery will be delayed at the very least! I visited with them and their 4 month old Border Collie pup, who is still rambunctious and fiesty, which is NORMAL for a pup that age!

I’ve bought lots of barrels of “snake oil” myself, and if we could burn it I would be the next OIL BARONESS of the world! LOL

BTW Hey, Silver, where you been, chickie! Missed you around here!

super chic

Thanks for this article!
I am so glad you said those things to him!
That is the type of thing where I would think
about it later… and say… “I wish I would have said…”

So no more EZ fix!!!!
This is going to be tough. But I’m still adamant.

Ox Drover

Dear Chic,

I am usually about 20 minutes “late” with the smart alec one-liners, my late husband was SO GOOD with them, he snapped them out like spitting watermelon seeds! Not me, but ONCE IN A WHILE I get a good one and that was one of those days! I loved it and I’m proud of me too.

I loved SEEING that worm squirm when he realized what I had said and how I reacted when he said “I’m offended” LOL Gosh it must be the ERIN BROCK coming out in me!!!! ROTFLMAO I think I’ve been blogging too much with her and her backspath-ism is rubbing off on me! LOL

It really was “fun” and I guess I shouldn’t ENJOY sparring with them like that, but golly gee, if anyone was selling (or trying to sell) “snake oil” it sure was THAT GUY! At one of our living history deals there was a guy there dressed up in a top hat and black suit playing the part of a “Doctor” selling a “miracle Indian cure all” and he was so cute with his spiel and this guy at the rodeo was short and fat, and without the suit and top hat, but his spiel was about as corny! LOL

I think EB must have “channeled” through me or something! But it WAS FUN! Wish you could have been there!

super chic

Yes, I too once in a while get the brilliance to come up with great one-liner,
but due to the CRS I can’t remember any of them!

super chic


Ox Drover

I saw a great quote on a TV show the other night, I told my son D that “that would be a great quote to use sometime, IF I COULD JUST REMEMBER IT, and really in 15 minutes I couldn’t recall anything but the general gist of it! Now I cant even remember that! ROTFLMAO

Nicest part is that you can enjoy the same jokes over and over! Senility is our friend!


Oxy, well written. 🙂 Thank you for your reminders!
It’s funny – while I no longer trust my own judgement (doing OK otherwise nowadays), I can tell who is and who is not having the tendencies by that very “quick fix” salesmen approach. This very thing keeps me from getting involved still, because those who are REAL lose so badly to the one who was Not. Real share their likes and dislikes and even when narcissistic are able to voice their true opinions. Like you say, if it’s too good to be true, it probably isn’t.

Ox Drover

Dear Gettingit,

Yea, it is almost funny now that you can spot those snake oil salesmen on the front end. Some of them can be VERY good though—look at Bernie Madoff, took BILLIONS of dollars before he got caught.

Every fall our local news agency talks about the traveling scam artists around here who show up at the doors of elderly people with a “deal” to “resurface their driveway” with this “left over product from a nearby job” at a VERY cheap price, and they pour used motor oil on the driveway after collecting several hundred dollars. Yet people still fall for that trick and are left a HUGE MESS and out hundreds of dollars.

I just now saw another ad float across the top of my computer about Dr. X’s discovery to cure Diabetes in 30 days—or wrinkle creams or magic fat removal pills…we think those are pretty OBVIOUSLY FAKE but how many BILLIONS OF $$$$ of these things are sold each year? Or fake home mini-gyms that will make you like like Mr/Ms. Universe in 6 weeks? I think selling fantasy PRODUCTS is a bigger business than music, sports, and entertainment all put together!

In one of my (this) lifetime “incarnations” I did sales work and was pretty good at it—problem was, I couldn’t make myself sell anything except what I truly BELIEVED in, so went on to other things, the big money in sales is selling someone something they don’t need and can’t afford—with a straight face, and convincing them that they DO need it and CAN afford it, even though you know that isn’t so.


Great analogy Oxy – I can understand this urge to try everything – I certainly have in an effort to fix my own problems. And some of the ‘cures’ are revolting and kooky, but when you’re desperate you will try anything to get some relief.

The diabetes point you make (cured in 30 days) … well I have seen something about that – not sure if it’s’ the same site you saw, but this one is a movie entitled Reversing Diabetes in 30 days. The participants all had Type 2 and went on a raw vegan macrobiotic diet for 30 days. By the end of it their blood tests were normal. I believe things like this can happen – the body has a remarkable ability to self heal if we can just support it with good food rather than refined and processed items. The problem with raw vegan eating is managing to keep it up in everyday life … it’s so easy to just grab a muffin or a sandwich when out and hungry.

Ox Drover

Dear Pollyannanomore,

Well, maybe you and those people selling that book should notify the American Diabetes Association and every diabetic specialty physician in the US and world wide if this is such a great “discovery”—sorry chickie, with many many years of teaching diabetics, helping them learn to monitor and take care of themselves and eat good diets, I have NEVER seen a “cure”—I have SEEN CONTROL of symptoms, but NEVER A CURE.

Since I have been on a calorie control diet, my sugars are NORMAL AS WELL, and it took less than 30 days, but it isn’t about a vegan diet, or raw food or macrobiotic, it is about a balanced and sensible diet—-and I don’t have to buy anyone’s book or eat anything special.

There’s no magic cure, in fact, there’s no “cure” of diabetes, only a CONTROL, but it takes patient parcipitation in diet, exercise and possibly medication. So far I have not had to use any medication, just diet alone.

I can eat anything any where at home or out, just in the RIGHT amount, and I AM hungry, because I am eating less calories than I am burning (so that I will slowly lose weight as well) and there is NO way to lose weight without eating less than you burn…so am upping exercise as I eat less in a HEALTHY MANNER so that I do not go into “starvation” mode metabolism (fad dieting which loses muscle and regains more fat).

Just like with the “snake oil”: salesman we DO look for an “easy fix” and there is NO easy fix to diabetic control, or weight loss or pain control with injuries—or recovery after a psychopath. The healthy way is the best way, and in the end, the quickest and easiest as well. There is also no santa and no tooth fairy! Not sure yet about the Easter Bunny! LOL (((hugs)))


This reminded my of my G. Parents ‘BINGO BLOTTER”.
I got a call from Gramps one day saying he’s finally found a cure for his back pain……I’ll send one to ya EB.
Gramma said, it was just amazing….yadayada…..her cribbage friend turned her on to it.

In the mail comes a BINGO BLOTTER…..with clear liquid.
The miracule cure to any and all pain.

Gramps said he was going to buy sstock in the company!

Hmmmmmm…….didn’t work for me…..but kept that part to myself!

Gramps made a lot of great investments, and turned around and lost his ass on ALL OF THEM… making poor financial decisions.
He sold life insurance for 50 years, President of big companies……guess what gramps didn’t leave for grams when he died……LIFE INSURANCE!!!!! Niether had it!

Talk about a family shock! No one saw that coming!

Snake oil…..spit…..i’ll send the BINGO BLOTTER your way!
Anyone in pain….i’m sure it’ll help.
Just believe!


talk about snake oil.
I got a call from a gf who has recently moved to spaths former ‘area’ in Florida.
I was telling her about the slimey dude spath had been duping……today the picture became clear.
Guess who she ran into today… the Drycleaners……
SLIME MAN and his GF!
She actually said he wasn’t as slimey as she had expected and was impressed he referred to his ‘elderly’ (sorry guys!) gf as honey. This guy is 40’s , gf is 60’s.
It turns out he’s now switching up to pharmaceutical sales…….
Guess where the spath comes in!!!!!

He gave her his card and said, welcome to the area, maybe we can get together for a drink…, him and my gf…..
I told her to sit on a bit……..maybe not such a great idea.

Wouldn’t it be HILARIOUS if she was invited to his christmas party and spath showd up to cook……and theres my GF!!!
Spath knows my gf…..
Oh, he’d FREAK!!!!!

Small world…….just sit on it EB!


Oxy – yes you’re dead right there are no quick fixes to anything. And chronic health conditions are often indicative of multiple systemic problems. As an example – my muscle pain is sometimes thought of as ‘systemic candida’ – so at present I am taking a strong antifungal that is making me feel quite ill, but I’m hopeful that if I eliminate as much as possible then repopulate the gut with healthy bacteria, it will at a minimum help the symptoms of pain and tightness.

I tried a raw vegan diet for my pain for six months and it did very little for me. I had more energy, but clearly in my case, there was more imbalance there than could be sorted out with raw vegies. I think it’s possible though in some instances to ‘rebalance’ the body. I read a book a while ago called ‘Clean’ that recommends a 14 day juice fast with one solid meal a day (at lunchtime). This is written by a physician who later became a cardiologist and then looked into Eastern medicine when his own health fell apart after 14 hour days in hospital.

His explanation of how and why it works makes sense to me. But he doesn’t make outlandish claims about cures – he simply states the regimen will cleanse the body and allow it to function better than it did before.

As an aside, I recently found this website that details a book written in 1939 by a dentist and nutritionist who compared the effects of traditional diets on health and the body with industrialised foods …fascinating reading.

I will be doing the fast myself in another couple of weeks – not looking forward to it but hoping it will help with pain and wellbeing!

Erin I have tried so many ‘cures’ over the years – even appointments with therapists who said ‘We’ll only need two sessions’ – I would then end up attending for over a year. I’ve spent thousands and thousands on products, creams, rubs, potions, pills and therapy and not much has helped.

I met a snake oil guy at a local market – he was selling extortionately priced magnetic underlays. I asked if he had one I could hire for a few days to try it and he said no and gave me the spiel about a money back guarantee – and that he’d never had to give a refund so far. I walked away at that point. I’ve heard it so often before!

Ox Drover

I have no doubt that a good many of our dental and health ills are caused by too many processed foods and IN TOO MUCH FOOD more than anything else.

Our ancestors though suffered from dietary deficiencies and my own great grandmother died from vitamin deficiency from living on salt meat, corn meal and molasses most of the year with little fresh food 7 months of the year. Not uncommon at all.

Most of the people in the world today don’t have a balanced diet available 12 months of the year, we do, and yet we as a country eat unhealthy foods—My diet wasn’t bad to start with, just WAY TOO MUCH of it and have gained 10 pounds a year for 6 years and THAT ADDS UP! So at 3500 Calories per pound that I must burn over what I take in that leaves 60 x 3500=21,000 calories I need to burn OVER WHAT I EAT. Can’t go too low or body goes into “fasting metabolism” where it won’t burn anything…(a natural state from having to starve every winter for our ancestors) so must keep calories at least 1,200-1,500 per day and up exercise, so hopefully, I will lose 2-3 pounds per week on average. So got to get my arse moving more and stay on the calorie restricted food intake. I am giving myself ONE holiday per month to eat a few more calories than that, but that is ALL the holiday I get. So far I have lost 10 pounds, and am “stuck” at that plateau, but if I keep with the diet and the exercise, it will “UN” stick soon, and start a steady downward trend.

I already feel better now that I am FACING FACTS and have quit denying “I have a problem” with my food intake and my weight—just admitting you have the problem and are ready to do something about it is the hardest part I think. Just like with the cigarettes. I finally REALLY wanted to quit and I did. So I finally REALLY was ready to get a handle on this food intake thing and I am DOING it. Same thing with the psychopaths, when we REALLY get ready to make a CHANGE we will DO IT!

Sometimes it takes a few “false starts” to get into the race.

The fasting for a few days I don’t think hurts a thing and isn’t “unnatural” or bad unless you have bad diabetes etc. BTW “diabetes” is now considered part of a “metabolic syndrome” not just one thing, but in concert with blood pressure and artery disease. Have to take care of them all as one thing. One part of health. Diet, exercise and sometimes medication. LIFE STYLE CHANGES if needed. I did. I am.


Very true – when we’re ready we do it with no excuses or reasons for failure. I think I have so had enough of being sick that I’m ready to cleanse out and create a better life for myself.

Being with the psychopath I know definitely contributed to my current problems. The pain symptoms started appearing within two yrs of being with him and got progressively worse. My nutrition during the decade with him wasn’t good as it was often what he wanted to eat rather than healthy food to provide fuel for the body. I tried to eat healthy but realise how badly I failed with the manifestation of pain symptoms that have persisted despite many health initiatives undertaken. I also realise that a big part of this pain will be leftover stress from the relationship with the psychopath – the problem is how do you discharge stress that is stored without your permission in your muscles?? I’ve tried meditation, yoga, pilates, deep breathing etc and no real results. The only thing that helps in the short term is massage.

I’m now forcing myself to exercise despite the pain and hoping against hope that though it hurts now it will get better in time.

I have read about metabolic syndrome … and can see how it develops and how it makes sense as a systemic condition. We’re very lucky to have so much information available online about natural health and medical conditions, but sometimes this information can be overwhelming when you’re just looking for the right answer!

Sounds like you’re on a winning plan in dropping that much weight – one day a month sounds sensible. A friend of mine doing WW has plateaued lately too – she’s started jogging to try to kick start her weight loss again. I tend to just walk and play some light sports. I do watch what I eat though but have an awful sweet tooth!


gives a little,’ hi polly’


I second Onesteps ‘HI POLLY’.

Hi polly! 🙂


Oxy –

I have been meaning to thank you for this one – I have been trying to think of the proper title to give our GAL, that best describes her — “Snake Oil Salesman” – PERFECT

Ox Drover

Dear MiLo,

You are welcome my dear! Glad to be of help! How are things going with the sit-u-nation! You are in my thoughts and prayers! Hope the Kiddo is doing as well as can be expected! You too!

The snake oil salesman at least gave me a laugh as well! Made my skin crawl a bit though!


Hi polly,

Like you I suffered from severe muscle pain especially in my back, neck and shoulders. This went on for about 15 years and I tried every diet & remedy available. I did the anti candida diet as well. It cleared my skin. It did not solve my problem with muscle pain. My muscle pain could not stop completely until I left the P. It turned out he was poisoning my food With small amounts of strychnine And possibly botox. But until that time I learned to control my muscle pain With 3 or 4 supplements: First I discovered magnesium malate And homeopathic magnesium. They both help control muscle spasms and are recommended for people with fibromialgia. Then I discoverd carnitine, an amino acid that helps the cellular mitochondria burn more efficiently. Added to the magnesium, it works even better. Then I began large doses of co-q10, 200 mg and up. As long as I kept up these supplements, my muscle spasms and burning pain was managed. They all work by increasing the efficiency of mitochondria, specifically in muscles. They are often taken for heart conditions for this reason and also to help burn fat but it hasn’t helped me for that. When I left the P I was shocked to find that I no longer needed these supplements, my pain was gone. There were many clues, but the big one was that he emptied the refrigerator the day after I left him. He mustve thought that I had or could discover the poison. But I digress, please try these supplements and also research another : HMB, very helpful, weightlifters take it to increase the amount of time they can lift before muscle fatigue.
I hope you are well soon.


Oxy – I’ve been to my share of rodeos, all those sore muscles and broken bones, he probably thought he was in hog heaven. I wonder if it works on horses too. I have been dealing with a lame one for some time now.

Everyone is doing pretty well. Thanks

Ox Drover

Dear MiLo,

Yea it was also for horses’ sore backs. LOL But I would suggest you just get it to a vet and see what they can come up with to help the hoss. I had to put my old mare down 3 yrs ago in the middle of the summer of chaos, she grass foundered (only horse I ever saw who did, but she sure did) she was 32 and in otherwise great health! She got so sore she couldn’t put one foot on the ground and the other 3 were bad too, so it had to be. Nothing to be done. She had a good life though, but was getting arthritis as well, so it was TIME. I miss her though. I have a mare now that looks a bit like her (red roan) and is sweet too, but haven’t been up and riding myself for a while.

Trying to get myself back in order with being too fat and lame myself, and I think when I finish with the “too fat” part some of the other stuff will be improved by default.

Skylar: many times we find out that just the STRESS that they put on us causes us all kinds of pain and disability. Stress that is high and continual can do a number on our health just by itself. I don’t doubt that he was poisoning you…one way or another or both! Just being around them is enough to poison the very air we breathe! THEY ARE TOXIC!!!


Yep, There is no doubt that many of my symptoms like my insomnia And fatigue were part of being stressed Because subconsciously I knew I was in the presence of evil. So when I left him and starting to feel better I assumed naturally that it was because I was not around him.
Concurrently I was wondering why he would empty out the refrigerator. Only thing he left was the catnip. Finally it dawned on me and then I remembered how many times he said, ” You would be so easy to poison because you take so many pills.” He was referring to all the vitamins supplements I took to deal with my muscle pain.
Sociopaths like to drop hints.

Ox Drover

Dear Sky,

Yep they do like to drop hints—and he WAS poisoning you, even if it was only through the STRESS…and believe me…high stress can literally KILL us. I’ve seen it do it to animals and I’ve had it almost kill me by wiping out my immune system making me get infections easily!

Taking care of ourselves, and LOWERING OUR STRESS as much as possible, being good to ourselves, eating right, sleep, exercise etc. is VERY important.

It has taken me a lot of false starts to get it “all together” and to FOCUS on myself, my health and my well being. Stopping smoking, eating right instead of gaining 10 pounds a year for 6 years. Sure it is less than a pound a month, but it ADDS up….and taht is what stress does to us, it is like DROPS of water into a bucket, it EVENTUALLY fills it up to over flowing. No matter how big the bucket is, if it keeps on DRIPPING it fills up.

We have to STOP the DRIP and be at PEACE. It is NOT easy to do. We have to keep the CHAOS out of our lives, and the PEOPLE WHO CAUSE CHAOS. In my case it was first one, then the other, but slowly I’ve accomplished the most of it. ONE DAY AT A TIME. One STEP at a time…

Just ordinary life has enough ups and downs and stress of its own, but when you add in the high stress of dealing with a psychopath it becomes a great burden. I haven’t been able to get rid of ALL the stress in my life (no one can) but have CUT it DOWN as much as possible.

We can only cut out the stress we can CONTROL…and get away from the psychopath (NC helps us control more). We can’t stop them from being what they are, we just get as far away from them as we can. I’m not quite by myself on a desert island, but if that is what it took, I think I would go there happily! It beats the heck out of putting up with the CHIT OF A PSYCHOPATH!


Hi One Step 🙂 How are things with you?

Hi Erin! How’s your spath battle going? Winning the war I hope 🙂

Skylar – thanks for that info .,.. I have read about those supplements being useful for muscle pain – I take magnesium at present but will look into the others. I’m also having trigger point therapy to loosen the knots.

I have no doubt the stress with the P at a minimum contributed to the pain – it developed after 2 yrs with him. Chronic health conditions are awful =- you’re always searching for the right solution and putting your hopes in the next big cure. I have definitely been vulnerable to snake oil sellers in the past but now try to be more discriminating! Hope all is well with you – thanks for the good wishes 🙂 The pain is much less now the P has gone. I’m just trying to work out how to undo the last bits of it all


I feel like there isn’t anything I haven’t bought and tried. in addition to the thousands of hours spent online researching supplements, tens of thousands of dollars went into buying supplements. I’d do anything to ease that horrible pain. I have closets full of supplements at my house, my BF’s house and more at my parent’s house. So I know what you mean about snake oil. Price is an issue so I shop online at where they have the cheapest, best quality supplements I can find. Prices are equal to wholesale from Mountain Peoples Warehouse – where I used to shop, but no tax and $5 shipping is good. I also look online for coupon codes.
What I find works best is taking 3 of each at a time. seems like alot but that’s the way I could tell right away if it was going to work.
Magnesium loosens the bowels so it might be an issue for you to take that much –or not. I found that a loose bowel was actually what I was aiming for. Now that I know I was being poisoned, I believe that magnesium worked so well because it was eliminating the poison more quickly!


sky and polly – check out:
solid, honest people. lead is worth double her weight in gold – extremely knowledgable.

polly – well ya know some things are better, my desire for vengence does not wain. am doing some work in that area. how are you? dating??? 🙂


very nice website. thanks. it has recipes that are gluten-free too!

sorry that you still have a desire for vengeance. Let’s rename it and call it JUSTICE. sounds less, umm socio. LOL.
I’ve read many of your posts and you are a woman after my own heart and I have to tell you: Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for justice for they shall have their fill.
It is so f—ing true. We will.
Sometimes, it is stated as “righteousness” instead of “justice”. It just means: what is right. morally, spiritually.
That is what most people on LF hunger for even if they don’t want vengeance. That is what makes this blog different from other groups of people. Most of us were looking to live in a world that was good, not perfect, but good and compassionate. That is why we were perfect marks for the con. Now that we are wiser AND stronger, we will not be marks anymore; we will be vigilent but we’ll stay compassionate. And our new found wisdom gives us the tools we need to make that world we wanted to live in. It won’t be handed to us. We will need to be very strong. But we WILL have our fill of righteousness.

For those times when you feel so angry at the P’s you can’t stand it, try to think of how your trials made you a better, stronger version of your old self.

In my case, I’ve mentioned that I was poisoned and spent countless years studying alternative medicine. I went gluten-free, low carb, don’t eat sugar (use agave syrup instead, because it is low on the glycemic index), cook from scratch alot and take lots of vitamins – all because I couldn’t stand the pain I was in. This is compared to the average american diet of quick meals that I used to eat because I couldn’t cook and was too busy.
Turns out that I AM allergic to gluten. Many celiacs learn the hard way: when they are dying of lymphoma after years of eating gluten because, like me, the symptoms of bloating, rashes and fatigue really weren’t bad enough to make the change. At that point it’s too late. Because my exP was poisoning me, I was forced to make these incredibly arduous changes in my diet in the early 1990’s and I’VE BENEFITED ENORMOUSLY FROM THEM. As have many friends and my family members who listen and have been converted. Now maybe I won’t die of lymphoma like my aunt did. And now, my BF actually pays me to keep him healthy by cooking like I normally would anyway and ordering his supplements for him and me. LOL. The sociopath saved my life in so many ways – he would die of envy if he knew. So I don’t want vengeance. But I do want justice.

BTW, I don’t mean to describe myself like superwoman. I still have a long way to go (some pounds to lose) and could be better in so many ways. But I can choose which perspective I take when assessing what I’ve lost and what I’ve gained because of the sociopath.
Today, I was thinking about how the sociopath completely destroyed my life – he did. But then I thought, “that’s ok, my life obviously needed destroying so I could rebuild it better than before with a more solid foundation.”

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