By February 6, 2008 82 Comments Read More →

Might there be physical consequences to life with a psychopath?

Several readers of Lovefraud have mentioned medical problems that arose in their lives with psychopaths. These readers are convinced that the psychological stress and pain of these relationships translated themselves into physical ailments. Some of these symptoms disappeared when the psychopath disappeared, some didn’t. Here are a few recent comments:

When I parted from him, physically I felt so raw and sore, I looked like I had been in a boxing ring. My health was poor and I couldnt even have the osteopath touch me, I said I felt like I had been stabbed all over. All though he never laid a finger on me, he gave me plenty of mental and emotional abuse.

I have a feeling its 2 years of being TIRED and worn to a pulp emotionally by his wordy games.

sleep loss is another big thing ive experienced since this s path during and after i still have trouble sometimes sleeping, like my mind will not shut off. and during being with the s apth i was trying to work out what the hell was going on and trying to work things ou in my head stopped me from sleeping well. which makes your head even more clouded.

Talking about physical consequences of being around bad stuff for seven years in my case, I don’t know if this applies but there is one thing that makes me think is the fact that my blood pressure got so much better. I used to have high blood pressure during the last four years with him. Since I left him for almost six months I don’t even need to take medication and I’m sleeping so much better these days.

Anytime we are trying to fix someone else, we are off track. I just work on me now. If I see someone other than me that needs work”¦ I feel TIRED. No can do!

Dr. Steve: I would so much appreciate a forthcoming post about physical consequences or PTSD of an association with a Sociopath. Nearly 5 months hence, and past the “why” and figuring out the “puzzle” (identifying him as a sociopath and doing intensive investigation/research as to who he really is and what he has done), there is still a lot of emotional pain

Have you noticed anything similar? How do you understand/make sense of this ‘translation’? Have you managed to deal with such an ailment or overcome it? How exactly


In future posts I will write more on the interaction between experience, the mind, and the body. I will present some ideas of how/why it is that a interpersonal situation can have bad effects not only on one’s mind but on one’s body. Also, I will introduce some exciting research on what you can do to help repair the damage psychological distress mave have contributed to your body.

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82 Comments on "Might there be physical consequences to life with a psychopath?"

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Dear Button, thanks for bringing this old thread up. I enjoyed reading some of the old posts.

I think I read somewhere that P’s have statistically shorter life spans than non-Ps but I don’t imagine it is by much (a few years across the board)

I agree with One-step on this one that the guy dying at 50 of a massive heart attack means he probably also got an early “death gene” from his ancestors. A great deal of our longevity is determined by our genetics as it is.

It behoves us though to take care of ourselves, and many Ps, just like the rest of us, don’t do as much as we should to take care of ourselves. Taking care of ourselves, decreasing our self imposed stress and doing healthy things for ourselves is what we should focus on so that not only the length but the quality of our lives is improved.

Life with my h-spath was extremely stressful due to all the chaos that he brought into our lives. I never slept well, tossing and turning all night long, being unable to control my thought processes during the night time hours, everything seeming bleak in my life. Now that we’re living apart, I am going through different stages, still having anxiety. My h-spath would sleep like a baby, none of the constant problems (that he created) disturbing him enough to affect his sleep. It was hell on earth, living on an emotional roller-coaster. Life is some what better due to being apart, being away from the chaos maker.

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