With all the uproar over Arnold Schwarzenegger and his “love child,” our friend Ann over at WomenExplode.com just wrote about her own experience of a cheating husband.
Read I can relate with Maria Shriver ”¦ at WomenExplode.com.
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Louise
behind_blue_eyes:
I do agree there. I have said before in previous posts on here that Maria had to know what was going on. She is a smart woman…come on! Just like we all knew what was going on when we were being scammed, but we chose to put up with it, BUT…only for a little while.
BTW, your name reminds me of my spath. He has blue eyes and is English and I have always loved that song by the Who. When I listen to the words of that song, it so describes him.
adamsrib
BBE,
I do feel sorry for Maria because as a victim of a spath/narc I know what she is feeling. Yes Hillary could have left but then she would not be where she is today. Is that right or wrong? I can’t judge her, I don’t know her.
Arnie had more to gain from marrying Maria than she had in marrying him. I believe she loved him just like we loved/love our ex.s We too knew what was going on and we are still hurting over that shaft yes? I know I am.
Louise
adamsrib:
Wow, yeah, it sounds like your spath and his new GF deserve each other. They will BOTH find out soon enough if they haven’t already!!
Yeah, I think the Karma bus is moving a bit too slow. But it will eventually get to its destination! 🙂
adamsrib
I personally WOULD NOT stay married to someone like that knowing what they are. I prolly would have never married them in the first place. Once I found out about TURD and his revolving door, I DUMPED HIS ASS and tho I get mighty temped I have not gone back.
But I just can’t speak for others that stay. I fully understand the betrayal bond and the Stockholm syndrome. It really does a job on our minds….
adamsrib
HaHa eb good one….the karma bus moves mighty slow…LOVE it!! Mind if I use it? 🙂
adamsrib
eb I am thinking that she will stick with his wandering because in her country it is expected of men to have mistresses. They look the other way as long as he does not get caught. But if he thinks she is a shrinking violet he will have a HUGE wake up call. I can bet he has not read her divorce papers.
What will happen is this; it is all about him all of the time. She will play the game at first, clean his house, do his yard work and his sorry ol ass but will begin to pressure him for some perks. It is there that she will screw herself because he is a raging bull and will not allow any woman to tie him down.
Because she is much younger than him and fairly attractive (and I won’t go anywhere near him) he will hang on until he fills that vacancy. She will then get wind of it and ALL HELL WILL BREAK LOOSE and boy don’t I wish I was a fly on that wall!!
Like I have said in the past, I am certainly no saint 🙂
darwinsmom
I originally put a lot of the blame on the poor, corrupt and criminal and violence on Nicaragua to explain the behaviour of my ex. He often said “I’m survivng!”.
But he wasn’t. First of all, his dad owned several properties, a big house of several buildings right smack in the middle of the highest booming tourist town at the coast. He had another property somewhere else, plus land. His mom owns a large house up north. They’re not rich of course, have to make ends meat for sure, like everyone needs to in that country. But his father was enterprising, and very conscious of ensuring a future for his children when they grew up as well as after his death. He even ensured monetary future to raise my ex-es son, and funded the higher education of the mother of my ex-es son so she can become a clerk instead of having to work in the field picking bananas. His cousin was raised as his sister. She works in a pharmacy in San Jose in Costa Rica. His dad was a retired firefigther with medals. His family could be called middle class.
Neither his older half-brother and cousin show the same behaviour. Ex never needed to survive. He was well taken care of. They all were and are.
I thought he sold drugs to kinda ensure some income, in a country where jobs are so hard to get. And because he had lived on my budget for a while, I must admit I was not totally naysaying against seeing some return. But I found after a while, that he was the worst dealer I ever saw. (a) he used (b) conned his clients by not showing up with the drugs after getting their money (c) showed off his large amount and hid it somewhere in the public areas where anyone could get to it if they looked. (d) he attracted too much attention to himself I told him once or twice.
He’s not surviving at all, he’s spending everyone’s money on drugs and drinking and party. In the days after his dad’s funeral his cousin claimed in shock that he had spent 1000$ of his inheritance in one night. That’s when his mom came down to save the remainder and keep it for him for his paper work and plane tickets to Belgium. His cousin had to return to Costa Rica to work, and begged me to convince him to return to Costa Rica where he had lived for 3 months after I left back home, before his rapid return for his father’s funeral.
Yes, there was a lot of criminality, yes there were a lot of drugs, yes the country is highly corrupt, and it’s the 3rd poorest country in the world… but now I finally recognize that he is not just a petty clumsy criminal trying to survive… he is one of the heavy criminals there, though not bussiness smart. He is not an addict. My mom thought he might be. But I never ever felt he was addicted to it at all, except the weed, and that’s a mental addiction, not a physical one. They just smoke the pot I think because when they’re still and quiet and there’s nothing exciting to do, at least something is happening in their heads.
I’ve known plenty more Nicaraguans with girlfriends of the US and European countries, who do occasionally like a wild party… but they were hard working and conscious about their lives, as well as the future. Most are… he wasn’t at all.
behind_blue_eyes
“BTW, your name reminds me of my spath. He has blue eyes and is English.”
So was mine…
Louise
behind_blue_eyes:
Uh, oh…maybe they were the same person?
Louise
adamsrib:
Of course you can use the Karma bus remark. I actually got it from Facebook in their Status Shuffle area. I thought it ws hilarious!