Relating to Maria Shriver

I originally put a lot of the blame on the poor, corrupt and criminal and violence on Nicaragua to explain the behaviour of my ex. He often said “I’m survivng!”.

But he wasn’t. First of all, his dad owned several properties, a big house of several buildings right smack in the middle of the highest booming tourist town at the coast. He had another property somewhere else, plus land. His mom owns a large house up north. They’re not rich of course, have to make ends meat for sure, like everyone needs to in that country. But his father was enterprising, and very conscious of ensuring a future for his children when they grew up as well as after his death. He even ensured monetary future to raise my ex-es son, and funded the higher education of the mother of my ex-es son so she can become a clerk instead of having to work in the field picking bananas. His cousin was raised as his sister. She works in a pharmacy in San Jose in Costa Rica. His dad was a retired firefigther with medals. His family could be called middle class.

Neither his older half-brother and cousin show the same behaviour. Ex never needed to survive. He was well taken care of. They all were and are.

I thought he sold drugs to kinda ensure some income, in a country where jobs are so hard to get. And because he had lived on my budget for a while, I must admit I was not totally naysaying against seeing some return. But I found after a while, that he was the worst dealer I ever saw. (a) he used (b) conned his clients by not showing up with the drugs after getting their money (c) showed off his large amount and hid it somewhere in the public areas where anyone could get to it if they looked. (d) he attracted too much attention to himself I told him once or twice.

He’s not surviving at all, he’s spending everyone’s money on drugs and drinking and party. In the days after his dad’s funeral his cousin claimed in shock that he had spent 1000$ of his inheritance in one night. That’s when his mom came down to save the remainder and keep it for him for his paper work and plane tickets to Belgium. His cousin had to return to Costa Rica to work, and begged me to convince him to return to Costa Rica where he had lived for 3 months after I left back home, before his rapid return for his father’s funeral.

Yes, there was a lot of criminality, yes there were a lot of drugs, yes the country is highly corrupt, and it’s the 3rd poorest country in the world… but now I finally recognize that he is not just a petty clumsy criminal trying to survive… he is one of the heavy criminals there, though not bussiness smart. He is not an addict. My mom thought he might be. But I never ever felt he was addicted to it at all, except the weed, and that’s a mental addiction, not a physical one. They just smoke the pot I think because when they’re still and quiet and there’s nothing exciting to do, at least something is happening in their heads.

I’ve known plenty more Nicaraguans with girlfriends of the US and European countries, who do occasionally like a wild party… but they were hard working and conscious about their lives, as well as the future. Most are… he wasn’t at all.