How to recognize and recover from everyday sociopaths - narcissists

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  1. Louise

    Stargazer:

    I love that cookie analogy! So true. My thinking has been heading in that direction the past couple months with No Contact. I know this to be true after all, it’s really only common sense, but our emotions and feelings cloud everything in our sight. We will all be OK one day.

  2. Stargazer

    The thing is, I think we hang on because we think the connection was so magical and we will NEVER find another connection like that again. Well, I can say with some confidence that after dating many MANY men, there is ALWAYS someone else out there you can feel a magical connection with. I thought I had a magical connection with the spath. Since that ended, I’ve felt that magical connection a few more times. The guys are not spaths. Unavailable, but not spaths. I’m moving up in the world. heh heh

  4. ElizabethBennett

    Star-I know and that’s true. It’s hard though. It is so weird that someone can be such the loner. I just don’t like being alone, so I can’t comprehend how she is so totally ok with almost no contact with people. I know that she was to be really extoverted and meeting with all kinds of people all the time at her job. Her job doesn’t seem to fit her personality because it requires so much social activity. I guess maybe it just exhausts her and then she has to be alone. It is sad because I really enjoy her company so much when we go to dinner. I had such a good time with her last week.

  5. Louise

    Stargazer:

    Good night and thanks for reassuring me that there is magic out there again. It’s hard for me to think that because I had never really felt it before him. BUT…I never dated that much either despite being a very good catch!!!

  6. Stargazer

    Nolarn,
    Some day you will get sick of reaching and reaching and reaching and not getting what you want, and you will move on. I suffered for a year over the neighbor boy, start to finish. Now I’m in a place where I can smile and say hi to him if the situation ever arises. Or I can ignore him. Either way. Ironically, my detachment will probably be very intriguing to him. ha ha ha Men…….can’t live WITH ’em……….. period.

  8. Louise

    nolarn:

    I guess I understand it because I am somewhat of a loner. I don’t draw my energy from people. I need that downtime to recharge my batteries. My guess is exactly what you said. That job is not really suited to her personality; it exhausts her because she has to be “on” all the time. So when she finally gets away from it, she crashes. It’s the only thing she can do to recharge. It is hard for someone like you who likes being around people to get an introvert. I go out with friends, etc., but other than that, I do not interact that much. My family does not live here; they are all 400 miles away so I never have those interactions. I go there about four times a year, but without having family right near, it’s hard. So people probably look at me and think the same thing you are thinking about DK 🙂

  10. ElizabethBennett

    eb-my family is far away too and I really don’t have a relationship with them due to their connection to the mother. I also lost a lot of friends due to my ex so I am alone so much. I myself am not super extroverted either and usually I am comfortable being alone. I don’t know why now it’s so hard for me to be alone. I wish my self esteem actually existed-then I could go out and do things. That is one thing I’m really suffering from, and it has to do with the rape. It killed my self esteem and I have gained so much weight that I am not comfortable. I can’t fit in my clothes well and I don’t look cute like I used to. I don’t go out. I wish that I could. I feel like I want to date but I just can’t and I know I am not ready.

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