If there is one skill that all of us mastered since birth, it has to be Sales skills! Straight away we started screaming out loud and announcing to the world that we are Hungry. If you are like me, you probably didn’t give up screaming until you got served those magic liquid drops, and I personally had no intention of giving up on mother’s milk, until I found myself screaming the same scream at the ripe age of 2, but nobody seemed to hear. Eventually my vocal cords got exhausted and I was presented with some alternative nutrition that was supposed to be better for me, because I happened to be a big girl. When it came to toys though, particularly Barbie’s, I was going to try the same method for getting them, but it was deemed inappropriate, so instead of screaming, I kept nagging, reminding my parents and all our guests how I look forward to making beautiful dresses for those dolls. All my dreams were about doll houses, pretty dresses and shoes, so I wouldn’t give up nagging and selling my idea to everyone how I deserved to be presented with beautiful Barbies and so I got what I wanted, well, most of the time…
What happens when we grow up though, how does our sales strategy change? Do we not use the same strategy to get what we want? On dates we get sold a bag of goods on why the person is a good candidate for us or rather the best partner in crime and the strategy is mutual, well, most of the time…There is a sense of clarity and precision on what/who we want and we go after it. We don’t scream or nag as adults, but we use different sales tactics, like charm for example. Imagine now you go into a store and buy a bag of chips, you open it up and it smells like rotten potatoes, it’s out of date and moldy. You complain and straight away you are directed to the customer service desk for a refund. There are terms and conditions defined pretty much for all businesses in the world to make customers Happy. Now think how many times you and I have been to that customer service desk begging for a refund (well replacement is not even a question), we don’t seem to be able to get anything, not even an understanding that we have been sold a Rotten Bag of Goods. There are no T&Cs, no refund policies and no customer service no matter how long you scream, nag and cry.
The solution? Quit trying to go back and ask for compensation because it’s not going to happen. I get it, you lost your dignity, your innocence, your self-esteem, your self-love, money, house, kids, pets maybe, and many other things, but stay strong…There is no refund for lovefraud for the rotten bag of goods you have been sold, simply accept this fact and move on. One way to minimize your losses is through self-reflection, finding what feels good for your body and for your mind, finding that place where you can create peace and harmony and build a new door so that new opportunities will come knocking.
Here is the entire Self-Love and Healing video series – to start at the beginning, scroll to the bottom.