Sociopaths will manipulate anyone. Let me repeat that. Sociopaths will manipulate absolutely anyone, including mom, dad, brothers, sisters—anyone. One way that this happens is the sociopath gets his or her family—knowingly or not—to participate in the victimization of the target.
Lovefraud received an e-mail from Rod in Nebraska. Rod’s daughter had been targeted by a sociopath. In his e-mail, he wrote the following:
One thing that I do believe should be approached about a sociopath is his ability not only to control his victim, but also his family. The sociopath works his family to the extent that he manipulates his immediate family into believing that none of his problems in life are his fault and consequently the blame falls on the one he wooed into a relationship. In this manner he deliberately cons his family into enabling him in his behavior. Oh, poor guy, the world is against him, he has a seizure disorder and has the gout. Thus concluding my opinion that he controls his universe and his family’s.
Family ties
There are parents who continually bail out their sociopathic children—even as grown adults. There are family members who continually acquiesce to the sociopath’s demands, maybe just to maintain the peace.
Sometimes the families are just as clueless as everyone else. They don’t understand the sociopath’s behavior, but they feel family members are obligated take care of each other. They believe the sociopath when he or she blames the victim for whatever is going wrong.
Other times, the family members are sociopathic themselves—the risk of developing this personality disorder is genetic. So they see absolutely nothing wrong with predatory behavior.
So to escape, the victim must often stand up to not only the sociopath—which is difficult enough—but the sociopath’s entire family as well.
ErinBrock
Hurtnomore:
What your experiencing is self protection/self preservation.
If you know your gonna get burned, eventually you don’t put your hand in that flame again.
Simple concept. Don’t doubt yourself…..regardless of what others say.
YOU and only you know how you feel and it’s up to you to protect yourself.
Your a wise young woman, youv’e chosen to seek answers and support from postive people in your life. COntinue down that path.
Respect yourself, love yourself and take care of yourself….because as you have learned…..NOBODY is gonna do it for you!!!
XXOO
EB
hurtnomore010
EB: thats exactly how i see it. but everyone else says im being prideful.
ErinBrock
Hurt….
who gives a shiat what anyone else says!!!!
Your driving the ‘bus’!!!
one/joy_step_at_a_time
hurtnomore – trust yourself.
kim frederick
Having a hard time tonight. I have been taking a drive down memory lane, listening to music I used to love, telling myself I was re-claiming myself and my life….REMEMBERING….sewing the arms and legs on the thing, getting it all together again. So very bitter sweet.
So very sad the memorys. It was such a sad time….It broke my heart. This was 20 years ago and I thought I’d done the work. I thought I had recovered. I moved on. I found another jerk to hurt me, and then another and another.
I’m still so hurt. And now I’m just old. I’m old and angry, and sorry.
I’m feeling exceptionally bad tonight….
one/joy_step_at_a_time
hey kimmy. i’m sitting next to ya, offering a cuppa and a witness.
silvermoon
Well, you have a couple of choices.
option one, you open the flood gates and cry until your sides heave and enjoy how good you are going to feel when you stop, because it produces some endorphins that have real value and can be recalled by some as a religious experience. Nothing wrong with a good angel or two and they are out there to call on in times like this.
option two let go. The best moment is now. You can just turn off all the stuff in your head, make it quiet and enjoy the songs you hear.
Option three change the music. bust some cheap dishes and hang out with me and one step for a while…..
one/joy_step_at_a_time
kim – i hope your silence means your writing a long post. hugs.
silvermoon
Kim,
I’m here too. Hugs.
its gonna be ok. Really.
one/joy_step_at_a_time
kim – i have to go to bed now, too. i hope you are doing something that is helping you process how you are feeling. xxx big hugs.