Russell Williams was a colonel in the Canadian Forces, a pilot who flew dignitaries including Queen Elizabeth II, and commander of the largest airbase in Canada. That is, until he was arrested for breaking into women’s homes and stealing their underwear, sexual assault and murdering two young women.
Lovefraud has written about Williams before: For Halloween: A real monster who liked to dress up.
The question, of course, is how did such a predator achieve the rank of colonel? Should he have been flagged along the way? How was it that Williams received nothing but stellar reviews, and turned out to be a murderer?
The Canadian Forces, stunned by what happened, launched an inquiry into how candidates are selected for senior command positions. Could enhanced psychological testing have revealed Williams’ true nature? Here’s what Macleans reported:
The answer, sadly, is no. Among hundreds of pages of internal military documents, obtained by Maclean’s under the Access to Information Act, is a draft version of that review. It confirms what leading experts have long maintained: there is no off-the-shelf exam that employers, armed forces or otherwise, can use to detect sociopathic killers. “Given the recent events in CFB Trenton, it is natural for the CF to question whether or not the organization could have identified a sexual sadist or predicted that an individual would become a serial sexual murderer,” the report says. But that “would be unrealistic to expect.”
Read There’s no way to spot another Russell Williams on Yahoo.com.
It’s probably true that no one could have spotted Williams. His case, however, is highly unusual. As I wrote in Sudden psychopath: The horrifying yet strange case of Col. Russell Williams, this case is unique in that Williams showed no signs of disorder before he suddenly became a sexual pervert and predator. Unlike most sociopaths, he didn’t have a history of lying, cheating and abusing. That’s why his case is so weird.
Judged by behavior
Although I don’t know much about the various psychological tests that are available, I doubt that any self-report inventory, where the subject answers questions about himself or herself, would work. After all, sociopaths lie. They lie about everything, so of course they’re going to lie on a personality test. Even if the test is designed to spot inconsistencies, how would anyone know which part is true?
To diagnose sociopaths, you need to know about their behavior. Most sociopaths leave a lifelong trail of destruction, ranging from overt crime to subtle emotional and psychological abuse. Dr. Robert Hare developed the Psychopathy Checklist Revised (PCL-R), and it has become the gold standard for diagnosing psychopaths (the term he uses). The PCL-R has two parts—a semi-structured interview, and a “file review.” This means that the individual’s criminal and psychological records are included in the evaluation. In other words, the psychopaths are identified by their behavior, not by their answers on a test.
The Gift of Fear
We, of course, don’t want to experience a sociopath’s behavior. We want to avoid them, so they don’t have an opportunity to inflict any damage of any kind. Can we do it?
I believe the answer is yes. The way to avoid a sociopath is to listen to our intuition.
Several people on Lovefraud have posted about a book called The Gift of Fear, by Gavin de Becker. Oprah Winfrey called de Becker the nation’s leading expert on violent behavior, and his company helps hundreds of people, including celebrities, stay away from stalkers and other predators.
De Becker’s whole point in The Gift of Fear is this: Your intuition will tell you about danger. Listen to it.
I can back this assertion up with data. In the Lovefraud Romantic Partner Survey, conducted earlier this year, I asked the following question: “In the beginning of the involvement, did you have a gut feeling or intuition that something wasn’t right about the person or the relationship?”
Seventy-one percent of respondents said yes. Let me repeat that: 71% of people who became involved with sociopaths knew early on that something was wrong. Unfortunately, most of them stayed in the relationship anyway.
Trust your intuition
I think it’s unlikely that an accurate paper-and-pencil test for spotting sociopaths will ever be developed. However, we all have a built-in early warning system. The system isn’t designed to identify sociopaths in an abstract sense; it’s designed to warn us when we are in the presence of danger.
Here are the three steps to protecting yourself from sociopaths:
- Know that sociopaths exist.
- Know the warning signs of sociopathic behavior.
- Trust your intuition.
The key is to pay attention to the warning signals that we receive. But often we don’t. We doubt ourselves. We give the person another chance. We wait for hard evidence. In the end, we are damaged and filled with regrets.
Would listening to their intuition have saved Russell Williams’ victims? We’ll never know. But Gavin de Becker did relate a story about a woman who was assaulted in her apartment. The assailant told her to be quiet, promised he wouldn’t hurt her, and left the room. The woman, filled with fear, didn’t listen to him. She listened to her intuition and slipped away. The guy returned with a kitchen knife, intending to kill her. But she was gone.
Darwin’s mom,
nice blog. I’ll check more of it out later.
The dream was very powerful. I think you got most of it down, particularly the 2 guardian dogs. They were friendly angels protecting you.
The old 19th century scene is extremely significant IMO, as are the women. I think you were in contact with your ancestors. Either in reality or symbolically. You were reaching out to your past, but further back than your birth. You were searching for answers in your heritage and the line of people that you come from. You intuited that you are part of a line of people who survived adversity and also thrived, in order for you to come into existence. Their wisdom is your birthright and you were looking toward that for advice on how to live.
What a beautiful and powerful dream.
Oh, I missed some enormous red flags. Looking back now, there were more red flags than they have at official parades in Beijing. But the biggest one — how is a 29-year-old man suddenly going to find his soulmate in an 18-year-old college student who happens to attend the same conference? He isn’t. He is going to find a little puppet who thinks it’s romantic when he proposes marriage after a month of dating, and that his hypnotic, snakey stare is a sign of being in love. Nope, not so much!
Wow, sky, never thought of those women like that… BTW the boyfriend I’m talking of is actually my ex-spath. Some of the symbols get another double layer meaning now when I read that.
behind blue eyes:
I get the ‘cosmic’ reference… MY luck was that I had my ‘cosmic’ experience with another man 9 years before my spath. It didn’t last, but he was my inspiration to alter my life… he’s the inspiration behind being a teacher and tourleading. But I was so upset with the cosmos about the relationship ending itself that I kinda went on a life strike before making all those changes, which eventually led to a kundalini experience and a guardian vision. He was at least a bigger love than the spath was.
Darwinsmom,
yes, I figured that out that it was about the spath.
The fact that he was bringing people into your home and leaving you exposed, was real but also symbolic. Your right brain picked up on the symbolism, I think. It was telling you that this man was exposing you to danger. A dream like that is always important to listen to. It was so important that it called upon guardians to help you.
Driving in a car is symbolic of being in control of the journey we are on. I had a car dream where I let ziggy the cartoon character drive my car and got me into trouble.
Speaking of cartoon characters. Last night was an dream of EPIC proportions. I was a two dimensional cartoon character amidst a sea of cartoon characters from various genre’s. The king cartoon, picked one of the comedian cartoons to lead a war against another bunch of cartoon characters. Our weapons? Erasers.
It was crazy.
There was a lot more detail but I just don’t remember it anymore. Just remember that the whole thing was so preposterous.
Speaking of preposterous. The spath emailed again. He wants to meet me at the house. sicko.
Skylar
What a great battle. Wish I could rub mine out. Not so easy with 22 years to to get rid off
STJ
xxx
You know, I had forgotten about the first part of that dream until I read it again last night. Things like that had occurred for real, ad I was able to make a lucid meaning out of it… but even then I wasn’t able to really see it for what it was. When I read that part last night it immediately said to me: this dream tries to tell me how unsafe he made me feel, and he was exposing me to very personal danger. When I read about the dogs this time I immediately saw them as guardians, almost against his evil.
I also now thought of the darkness and blindness being me being blind of how dangerous and evil he was. I was still at the driver’s seat, but driving blindly… I didn’t know who I was involved with. And yes, I was losing my way and went totally off track. The relation was unsalvagable, only leading to a dead end.
At the time though, I thought of “what am I doing wrong in this relationship.” I thought I had helped it steer to the dead end.
Lol: erasers for weapons. 2d Cartoon figures… sounds to me like superficial masked figures, acting out a caricature role without having any dept.
My dad once had a crazy dream where his mom was driving (and they lost their way), and my dad was immensely nervous, because in RL she couldn’t drive at all. I remember him telling me that dream after he had it on a camping trip in France when I was 11. Once I started dream analizing ten years ago and knew about the meaning of cars and who’s at the driving wheel I told my dad that this dream of way back then implied that he felt that his mother was controlling a part of his life.
About puns in dreams: last year, almost a year ago to a T I dreamt about the ex-spath, looking for him because he started to severely neglect me at the time. He was basically unreachable for days and days. Instead of Nicaragua I ended up in Costa Rica at a beach town at a market… I found him there, but not to sell goods, but himself… When I woke from that dream I instantly had the message stuck in my mind “he’s putting himself on the market”. Turned out 4 months later that he was cheating on me at the time, trying to hook and angle for the tourist girl he cheated me with afterwards on facebook, and he was with her in Costa Rica. It’s also Costa Rica where he hooked, lined and sinkered the new London victim.
Oh my: he really is up to something… yup that’s sick.
I used to analyse dreams when I was with the spath and I had a great reference book and I was getting quite good at it. The kids came to me all the time.
This book went missing ??? But my son got me a new one for Christmas–but I can’t take to it as it is just filled with supersticious nonsense. Can#t bring myself to tell my son yet.
I am just getting into it again. PTSD Interferes,
Skylar. Sometimes I have fun in cartoonland–it relieves my stress and lightens my mood. Just fun.
In the last months of My nightmare spath experience with my ex-H P–it felt like he was trying to erase me-my identity.
I have read somewhere that people who live with N’s experience being invisible. I have felt this in relation to me with him too in the past.
All I saw was Dolphins and Sharks in battle each one trying to get rid of the other. I hope I was on the winning team in your dream and that I was a dolphin.
Funny fact-Spath didn’t dream -or else was scared to tell them to me in case I figured him out.
STG
xxx
I do think spaths have dreams… but not any dreams we care to know, because the only in depth feelings they seem to have is anger, envy and rage. Also, we’re rarely supposed to remember our dreams: short term memory is shut off during REM-sleep. It takes waking up during the dream to remember it, because the waking up will make short term memory kick into gear again. If you wake after REM-sleep, the dream never got stored away, and you forget it. People dream 4-7 dreams a night.
Never used a book for it… but if I need inspiration or get stuck, I’ll check what this site has to say
http://www.dreammoods.com/dreamdictionary/
Thanks darwin’s mom for the website.
The book I had gave three interpretaions, one spiritual of events or places etc. It also gave meanings to the feelings associated with the dream in progress.
With myself–I find that I seem to dream in clumps. Like a TV series playing out. Then nothing for ages. I just think that my unconscious has latched onto some thing that needs resolved.
I personally think that spaths must dream. Their brains may work different-but basics still apply.
I just think that they are secretive and don’t like to let much out. Holding a mask in place needs support and to claim that they don’t dream stops them for giving the game away.
STJ
xxx