How to recognize and recover from everyday sociopaths - narcissists

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A survey British adults by a consumer campaigning charity found that 25% have used a dating site. Of them:

  • 40% discovered fake profiles
  • 20% were asked for money

Another survey by 192.com of 2,000 people who created web profiles found:

  • 10% faked their address
  • 18% changed their age
  • 28% lied ab out salary or debt
  • 20% fabricated their profiles

Online daters told to beware of ‘romance fraud’ on Telegraph.co.uk.

Reader Interactions

Comments

  2. jm_short

    The quicker we can get the message out that telling biographic lies to engage in sex is rape by fraud, the quicker the world will be an enlightened, safer place!

    I’ve written of my experience with rape by fraud in “Carnal Abusive Deceit, When a Predator’s Lies Become Rape”. If you’d like to show your support, and even get an autographed first edition, please log onto http://www.indiegogo.com -keyword, Carnal Abusive Deceit.

    JmS

  3. nottakingitanymore

    Regarding age – My advice is DO NOT give the site or any stranger your real birth date. They can use it for identity theft. Aside from changing my birthdate (not by a significant amount), my online dating profile is accurate.

    The men I’ve met online – not always.

  4. nottakingitanymore

    Some tips for spotting frauds online –

    1. They are immediately smitten by you and ready to move to where you are or fly you to where they live.
    2. They ask for money.
    3. They have just moved to the area and want to make friends and have someone show them around, fill them in on what the good places to live, eat, shop are. (This is a sure sign that a man is on a business trip and he is hoping to get some action while he’s away from the wife.)
    4. Their writing is poor. Poor grammar, poor spelling, and especially phrases that sound odd. Yes, we all make mistakes, but too many of them usually indicate a foreign scammer.
    5. Hard luck stories. If his life is such a disaster, why would you want to get involved in it???? If it’s real, he needs to get his life sorted out WITHOUT YOUR HELP before he starts a relationship. If you do help him sort it out, do you think he’s going to stay with you once he does? No. He will use you and move on. Stay away from this guy. If it’s fake, then he’s lying to play on your sympathy. Stay away from this guy, too.
    6. Unemployed. Easy to happen in this economy. But if he’s unemployed, he needs to focus on his job and not on dating.
    7. Anything in the profile or messages to you that doesn’t add up. If he is contradicting himself, he’s lying. Stay away.
    8. Very short profile, very short message. Either he’s too lazy to write about himself or he’s hiding something. Stay away.
    9. Generic message. He’s lazy and spamming everyone with the same message. Example: “I read your profile. You sound like a great gal and I think we have a lot in common. Would you like to meet?” My answer (to someone who has very little in his profile and absolutely nothing in common with me): “Thank you for your message. Can you tell me a little more about what we have in common?” Usually no further contact after that.

    There are some nice guys out there. You just have to be very careful to avoid the scammers, the frauds, the seriously damaged, and the sociopaths.

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