Isn’t it strange how the mind works? I read with approval Dr Leedom’s latest post. In it she manages to be at once hard-nosed, realistic, and still keep positve. There are very real differences in the brains of those with psychopathic traits, she writes, but the brain is plastic and therein lies just a sliver of hope.
For some reason the opening lines of Martin Amis‘ novel House of Meetings came back to me. It is set in the Soviet Union:
Dear Venus
If what they say is true, and my country is dying, then I think I may be able to tell them why. You see, kid, the conscience is a vital organ, and not an extra like the tonsils or the adenoids.
Amis has also written a stunning nonfiction book about Stalinism, Koba the Dread, which has its own staggering opening:
Here is the second sentence in Robert Conquest‘s The Harvest of Sorrow: Collectivization and the Terror-Famine:
We may perhaps put this in perspective in the present case by saying that in the actions here recorded about twenty human lives were lost for, not every word, but every letter of this book.
That sentence represents 3,020 lives. The book is 411 pages long.
And then I remembered that Amis’ cousin Lucy Partington was murdered by the infamous serial killer Fred West! How could I have forgotten? Amis wrote wrenchingly about it in Experience:
My family cannot understand the extraordinary collision that allowed him to touch our lives, and I have no wish to prolong that contact. But he is here now, in my head; I want him excised. And Frederick West is uncontrollable: he is uncontrollable. For now he will get from me a one-sentence verdict…. West was a sordid inadequate who was trained by his childhood to addict himself to the moment when impotence became prepotence.
Amis clearly knows a thing or two about psychopathy. Consider his compact ‘verdict’:
a sordid inadequate
-
- – this suggests ignoble actions and motives arousing moral distaste and contempt combined with a biological lack
trained by his childhood – dysfunctional modelling and upbringing by his family and surroundings
addict himself – this both highlights the central, pleasurable place wickedness played in his life and emphasises the crucial place of will (he didn’t become addicted he addicted himself)
to the moment when impotence became prepotence – here is the defining characteristic of the psychopath: he lives for the moments when his power or influence over others occur. Deep beneath this is a secret fear/knowledge of his utter unimportance/worthlessness.
Amis, through the imaginative power of the artist, has captured remarkably well the heart of the matter.
He is not an easy read, but it now occurs to me that in a way our theme has been one of his central themes. For example, Lovefraud readers have recently written worried letters about the perpetuation of psychopathy among the young via antisocial social environments and psychopathic genes. Time magazine’s recent cover story is about the phenomenon of youth delinquency in Britain. Amis was ahead of the curve when he wrote about it in his novel Yellow Dog.
His forthcoming book is a collection of essays on 9/11 called The Second Plane. (You can read one essay, ‘The Age of Horrorism’ , here.) The collection has received a lot of negative comment: Amis is a racist, etc. Well I’ve read a lot of Amis’ work and and can’t square with that judgement. (What he says is that Islamofascism produces awful racist feelings in him and he doesn’t know what to do with them.) I wonder whether some of the objections to his book are due to what we at Lovefraud encounter all the time: regular folks’ refusal to believe in human evil. These are the fortunate people who have not fully encountered evil – hope their luck holds out.
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Back to Dr. Leedom’s article – she makes it clear that the small candle of hope she holds out is not for the full-blown psychopaths Amis writes about, but for those with psychopathic traits.
Hi Mamma G,
if I didn’t have so much to do……I’d head on over to OZ and get that hug from you!!!
I was thinking tonight….going through my stuff…..my dad made me a oak inlaid tea trolly for a wedding present……he made all the women in the family one when they got married…..I don’t have room for it, never liked it really and i’m gonna get rid of THAT too!
What’s a mountain girl doing with a TEA TROLLY?
Maybe i’ll put it on my deck when I leave this house with the leftover EGGNOG for my buddy the bear!
I’m heading off to bed…..I don’t know….but for some reason, I am exhausted these days!!! 🙂
Night friends.
WOW EB, I wish youd write an illustrated kids book about that there BAR!
Im sure it would be a great success!I can just picture that ther bar hanging over the balcony with one leg, scratchin his crotch!
You have such a great comedic gift, get it written gal!
Love,
Mama GemXX
MamaGem…
I vote in your favor!!! EB should write a childrens book about the bear. LOLOLOL! Can you imagine a new bear book that out shines YOGI??? and Booboo?
EB,
I’m sorry you are going through this (hugs)…. Keep the things that mean the most to you and let the rest go. That’s what I did when I left xspath. I lost alot… but got the things that ean the most to me. My family heirlooms. I don’t have kids to hand them down to ….. so dont ask me why they mean the most… but they do!
Wright that book woman!!!!
Soimnotthecrazee1!
Dear EB,
Tea Trolley!!! LOL Yea maybe you could teach the bear to push it around! LOL Isn’t THAT A VISUAL? Pushing the trolley with one paw and scratching his crotch with the other! Someone sent me a video of a 3 legged bear the other day and it was really funny. On open ground the bear would stand UPRIGHT AND WALK, but in the woods where the footing wasn’t so good, it would get down on all 3 and hop along (it was a front leg that was missing) like you would expect it to. It had a cub with it, and it could really move walking upright. Viewed through the trees it looked like Sasquatch (how ever you spell it). Really awesome.
Get some rest sugar! I’m trying to do that myself and rest up from all my physical labors. Beautiful warm spring day—probably be a blizzard in a few days, you never know about the weather this time of year here, could be 70 or -10, ice or snow or sunshine. One year it RAINED cats and dogs, but the temp was 29 degrees so we had 4 inches of ICE on everything, shut the entire state down for 2 weeks, NO POWER, NO PHONES, NOT EVEN CELL PHONES, and no water, even for city water folks as there were no pumps because electric was OUT. Pine plantations flattened like a game of “pick up sticks” and roads totally closed, so I can relate to all these folks that are having that kind of problem this year. Not 13 feet of snow, but the ice and power outages and all that. Just grateful it is them and not me! (YET this year)
You talking about picking through your stuff and deciding what to keep and what to toss or sell makes me think about my own paring down and how I had “saved” stuff for my grandkids, like a hard-rock maple table I had as a kid and the chairs that went with it, tossed it…all of the stuff that P-son colored for me when he was little in school, his report cards his baby teeth, tossed it all. All my school annuals….and carp like that that All I ever did with it was store it and look through it once every 4-5 years and say “oh, how cute”—and every christmas card I had received in the last 40 years—tossed it. Every check I had written since I was 18 and every tax form—kept 10 years and tossed the rest.
Got rid of every book I will never re-read, though still have a sheet-load of books, but I do reread some of them but if I have to leave here, they will go too.
Should know something about the parole hearing SOON, I know the date is in January (he killed the girl in January 1992) so I’ll have some idea when he can either go back to the parole board or when he is due to get out. Even if they approved his parole it would be 6 months to a year before he would actually get out, which would give me lead time to get moving. Actually, you’d be surprised how quickly you can move if you put your mind to it. And, really how LITTLE you really need to live with. I had enough dishes and cooking ware to cook for “cox’s army” and I pared that down to a reasonable amount to cook for 4-5 and serve 8 in a pinch, and I picked up some “good” (heavy) paper plates and bowls and even plastic ware for those few times I had a bunch of boy scouts here.
Realized I didn’t need 50 tees or 50 pair of jeans (I do have a washer and dryer) so kept a wardrobe for 1 week of work clothes, casual, and a dressy dress or two to wear to weddings and funerals or the doctor’s appointments etc. and one week’s worth for each season. (hot or cold) It amazed me how LITTLE I really needed, and how LITTLE I missed what I had gotten rid of.
It is also much more simple to clean around, and to put things away, because there is SPACE for everything. The old “a place for everything and everything in its place.”
I think once you get “into this thing” EB you will actually ENJOY the paring down. Look at it as a NEW LEAF in your book of life, one that has less STUFF TO WEIGHT YOU DOWN! (((Hugs))))
Hi Ox and EB. The clearing out is very therapeutic. It’s amazing the stuff we keep.
I threw out spath’s stuff, so when the police came and said spath says ‘he has to come and collect his stuff’, I said no need to bother he ain’t got anything here!!
Anyway it was only an excuse for him to come round and try to get me take him back …soooooo predictable.
This week I have cleared out the house, well just about. Am living with my daughter and the house is up for sale.
You are right Ox it’s surprising how little you need when it comes down to it.
So you plan to disappear before your son gets out?
50 pairs of jeans?!
Have had a lovely evening at a church event. We are covering listening skills – I haven’t laughed so much in ages.
In an earlier post someone said they wondered if they would ever laugh again. Well I have been in limbo for weeks but finally tonight I had a really good laugh, with some really good, kind, genuine people. so yes, we can laugh again, just takes a little time to get there.
Dear Candy,
Yea, I will have to disappear if he gets out, even if they put a leg radio monitor on him the would jump ship and come after me. He cut one off once when I had a monitor put on him when he was 17, and jumped bail. He has no caution or fear, he is gonna do what he is gonna do, regardless of consequences. Some how he thinks, I think anyway, that he can get away with whatever he wants to do. He has NEVER been successful at that LOL but he doesn’t seem to learn from his blunders. Funny thing is he is really really “smart,” but book smart (IQ) and good sense are not the same thing. He is almost a joke as a criminal as he gets caught just about every time because he tells people what he iS GOING TO DO, then tells them what he has DONE, and some how he can’t figure out that that running his mouth off gets him caught! DUH! Even a guy with an IQ like a rock should know that much!
I honestly don’t think he WILL GET OUT any time soon but if he does, or when he does, then the other sons and I’ll have to skip town, but that’s okay–just do what you have to do. It was a big deal 3 years ago but now, I don’t feel attached to STUFF or to PLACE, I’m like a turtle, I take my “home” with me where ever I go, it isn’t a specific piece of dirt, or certain sticks and stones that make a “home” or even a “house”—I can be happy where ever I hang my hat!
Yes, it is amazing how we can LAUGH AGAIN! My sense of humor is back (and sometimes it’s pretty twisted, but I don’t know anyone who laughs more than I do!)
Oh My – Put your crash helmet’s on Henry is back..I got new tires, new computer and paid my taxes, all with cash..! I will have to do alot of reading to catch up with everyone, I see my twisted sister is still here, I see she has been shooting birds out of the sky where she lives…Mamma Gem are you flooded there in OZ? And how is Kimmers and pinky doodle doing? Hello to everybody that care’s and to those that don’t as well…!
Dear Henry,
HELLLLLLL_OOOOOO!!!!!! Boy am I glad to see you back darling! Sounds like you are in the pink! Hope “Sanity Claus” was good to you! I can’t remember who said that one but I thought it was cute!
Do you have a new e mail addy now?
When is your eye surgery?
Actually I’ve been doing fine and surprising myself actually, at just how much work I could do and still be semi-mobile. The second day afterward is always the worst, and yesterday was IT! The old back complained all night every time I went to turn over but today has been fine. I’m over the weight loss plateau I think and have lost another couple of pounds so that is uplifting to the spirits. Gosh I hate looking like Roseanne Barr at her biggest! LOL The only thing she ever did that I loved was “She devil” I think the name of it was where she got even with her cheating X husband who left her for the romance writer. I hate to admit that I liked that movie, but I really did. I laughed my arse off at the “War of the Roses” until the end where they both died, and I thought “how sad” and I cried and was ashamed of having laughed. I wouldn’t even admit watching either of those shows except here on LF. LOL (and just between you and me of course, our secret!)
Well, glad you are back, Henry! Saturday nights are not the same without you…and BTW EB is kind of going through a hard time right now, so this is a perfect time for you to come back and help us keep her afloat! You guys saved my bacon last year about this time, so we need to buoy her up! (((hugs)))
Hi Hens!!!
Helmet is on!!!!! What am I waiting for?
Congrats on getting all your stuff taken care of!
NTCRZE