A Lovefraud reader alerted us to an audio clip on YouTube called, How not to pick up chicks.
Here’s the story, according to the person who posted the audio:
“One of my friends from work and her friend were out one night in the SF Marina district and were hanging outside of the bars trying to find a cab. One of the girls, Olga, ends up meeting this guy Dmitri and they talk for at the most two minutes. She hands him her business card and says call me.”
Here’s what our Lovefraud reader wrote:
“You should be able to hear a telephone recorded message from Dimitri to Olga. It is so telling. Only Dimitri speaks, but for anyone needing/wanting a lesson in identifying red flags this couldn’t be more perfect. For those of us who have been victimized by this pathology, it is also a lesson in really listening to what is being said. For me, a former victim, it made the hair on the back of my neck stand on end.”
I literally howled listening to the tape. Here’s the link:
Thanks Free!
Wow guess one never know just how deep the rabbit hole really goes…..
Sick puppy and a sad case indeed….
OMG this guy is no sociopath- he’s just a jerk!
Actually, you will at least have to give Dimitri an A+ for creativity, by turning his psychopathic sickness into a business. Now if that’s not making lemonade out of lemons I don’t know what is. LOL
The thing that is the craziest thing to me about it is that there are people who will actually PAY TO TAKE LESSONS from the sick bastard!
I read the post in the Toronto Sun and of course was appalled by this Dmitri/Sears character. However, think about what he is doing, teaching men how to pick up chicks. This man is a blatant N/S/P whatever label you care to put on him. He is just out in the open (unlike those we have encountered) spewing his venom and recruiting others to follow his lead.
I found the telephone message on YouTube to be a “short cut” lesson for those wondering how the trap is set and what to expect later. It is a condensed version of what most of us have experienced in our relationship with the “bad man/woman”.
In the Toronto Sun article it is mentioned that Dmitri/Sears underwent a psychiatric evaluation and was found to have “no major psychiatric illness” however he was immature, manipulative and “narcissistic”.
The idea that Sears is profitting from his disorder is outrageous and speaks volumes about the culture and society in which we live. Men pay money to hear a creature denigrate women and that men are hard-wired to rape and conquer the opposite sex. This leads me to believe that the estimated data of 1-4% of the population is N/S/P is incorrect. I truly believe there are many more of the pathologicals trolling the earth on a constant search for the next victim.
We all write of how our encounters with this type of creature has had an extremely negative effect on our lives. We have difficulty forgetting, letting go and emotionally healing. I cannot include forgiveness because for me I will never forgive the N for taking full advantage of my goodness and caring. He was/is a predator and I barely escaped with my psyche intact.
These individuals do not deserve forgiveness and are not worthy of the effort.
Although some of you may have found this YouTube clip to be humorous (perhaps that is a sign that you are well on your way to recovery) for me it was bone-chilling. It did remind me (in an abbreviated version) of the way the N worked to control me. There were red flags every where, but I refused to see. The red flags (maybe they started out pink) were more subtle than Dmitri’s but were there just the same.
I just listened to the clip on YouTube, and I did NOT like the way he said, IF I DO NOT HEAR FROM YOU BY 3PM TOMORROW, FORGET IT, sheesh, he sounded so confident, so full of himself, he even said I AM QUITE A CATCH, brother, can he get through doorways with that head of his???? That is a right turn-off if ever I heard one, brother, I am wondering what Olga saw in him, was she really THAT desperate???? I hope she turned him down cold, I would have!!!!
It is shocking to think that this technique actually would ever work with any woman.
I say that after being duped by one of his ilk. It’s just that in my case, and I would imagine with most who post here, the techniques may have been the same, but they were at least mixed in with him acting more normal and nice in the beginning and the red flags were spread out over time before they became a more frequent and consistent part of his behavior.
I would love to have a psych professional take the transcript of this tape and analyze it bit by bit. I would like to see each sentence or phrase he utters identified for what it says about him. This would be like an index of what to look out for. I would like my friends and my daughters to have the list so they know what to watch out for.
I realize it would be rare for a single sentence on its own to signify such a warped person. Usually it is the picture that is built up over time. But for this guy, there were actual single sentences that were, standing alone, big danger signals.
O.K. this one’s much more subtle. One of our exposed predators did a call in show with a friend. He calls himself “Sammy” Now, PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE forget the politics being discussed here… just listen to one BIG Thing…
HE WAITS FOR PAMELA, the show’s host, TO PROFER AN OPINION AND THEN HE EITHER AGREES WITH HER OR REPEATS HER OPINION A FEW MINUTES LATER…. this is part of the sociopath’s profiling. Mirroring his target!!
This was sent to us by his Target #2. CLICK HERE He comes in a few minutes into the broadcast so be patient.
When we listened to it, all of us realized he was saying nothing but parroting the host in order to look good and promote his website.
Dmitri is much more obvious and wow… what a puke fest! But a great example of the importance of REALLY LISTENING to people before you get suckered in.
Dear Fighter
I haven’t listened to any of the clips because I can’t access that type of content at work but your comment, “Mirroring his target!!” jumped out at me. That is exactly how I described my ex-P.
After his lies were exposed I realised how he took my life experiences and things I said and mirrored them. I had a difficult childhood and a complicated painful relationship with my parents so of course, so did he. Except he had to go one better and say that he was adopted (he’s not). I spent some time living overseas so of course he did too (another lie).
These are just two examples of how he mirrored me.
I’ve been having a bad few days and last night I felt physically ill when I thought about how he pawed through my life. I told him my hopes and dreams, my fears and vulnerabilites and all the time he was thinking of how he could use my words to his advantage. I don’t know when I’ll stop feeling contaminated.
Dear Fighter, I read the articles on your site almost every day and they are very good for giving people a reality check and I like the clear way they are written.
Mirroring can be a natural response between people who are ‘in tune’, but I guess you are talking about mirroring that is designed to consciously manipulate.
Mirroring can be a natural response between people who are ’in tune’, but I guess you are talking about mirroring that is designed to consciously manipulate.
Predators COUNT ON their victims thinking EXACTLY what you said in your first sentence.
We don’t GUESS – they ARE trying to consciously manipulate!! But how are you to know?? Unfortunately, you MUST ASSUME for your own safety everyone’s a predator until they prove beyond a shadow of a doubt (and you do a background check) that they aren’t.
Feeling “in tune” with you is PRECISELY one of the modus operandi of both online & offline predators. ASSUME NOTHING.