From time to time, Lovefraud hears from men who complain that we talk about male sociopaths but not female sociopaths. Actually, I was very careful to refer to both men and women in every post on the main website, Lovefraud.com. And here on the Lovefraud Blog, we do have a category devoted to female sociopaths. But the fact it, approximately 80 percent of Lovefraud readers are women who were exploited by sociopathic men. So yes, it does seem that Lovefraud tilts towards male predators.
That’s why a website called ThePsychoExWife.com is an important resource.
I first learned about this website last week from the following story in the Philadelphia Inquirer:
Divorce blog’s rancor erupts in free-speech dispute
Here’s the gist of the story: A suburban Philadelphia man and his wife split up six years ago, after a nine-year marriage. However, the child custody battle raged on, featuring antics by the ex-wife that will look very familiar to those of you who are attempting to co-parent with sociopaths.
So the ex-husband and his new partner launched ThePsychoExWife.com as a place to vent. No names are used. The ex-husband is identified only as “LM.” His new partner is “DW.” His two sons are “S1” and “S2.” And his ex-wife is “PEW.” This stands for, as you can guess, “Psycho Ex Wife.”
Apparently the website was up for several years, and recently PEW found it. LM contends that, because no one is identified, PEW had to be actively looking for it in order to discover it. He also contends that PEW showed the website to their two boys.
PEW complained about the website to the court. Here’s what happened next, according to the article:
At a June 6 custody hearing, Bucks County Court Judge Diane Gibbons ordered him to “take down that website” and never again refer to his ex-wife “on any public media” or mention his children online “other than ‘happy birthday’ or other significant school events.”
Judge Gibbons essentially threatened LM—if he did not take ThePsychoExWife.com down, he would lose his 50% custody of the children.
LM contends that the court order is a violation of his First Amendment right of free speech. He’s hired another lawyer to appeal it.
Borderline Personality Disorder
Based on the theatrics and manipulation exhibited by the ex-wife, LM has come to the conclusion that she has borderline personality disorder.
Borderline personality disorder is a sister condition to sociopathy. Like sociopaths and narcissists, someone who has this disorder has difficulty recognizing the feelings and needs of others. They also tend to have unstable emotions, on-and-off mood changes, and emotional reactions that are out of proportion to whatever events have triggered them. So what is different? Unlike sociopathy, a central feature of borderline disorder is anxiety.
Researchers estimate that 1% to 3% of the United States has borderline personality disorder—the same prevalence as antisocial personality disorder. However, according to the DSM-IV, about 75% of those diagnosed with borderline personality disorder are women. “You should know that there is a gender bias in diagnosis such that women are often labeled ”˜borderline,’” wrote Dr. Liane Leedom in her Lovefraud Blog article, Sociopaths, cluster B personality disorders and psychopathy. “These women can also be sociopaths who leave a trail of victimized friends, lovers and children in their wakes.”
PEW admits that she has an alcohol problem, she has lost her job and her house is in foreclosure. Reading her emails that have been reproduced on the website, she appears manipulative and blaming. I’d say LM’s assessment of her is correct.
So ThePsychoExWife.com has become a resource for people dealing with a woman with borderline personality disorder. According to testimonials, even therapists find the website to be helpful.
Save the site
LM has complied with the court order and the home page of ThePsychoExWife.com has been shut down. But a new website has been launched, SaveThePsychoExWife.com. This website chronicles the court battle and posts several court documents. The transcript of the hearing in which Judge Diane E. Gibbons ordered the website shut down is enlightening.
Apparently, pages of original site, ThePsychoExWife.com, are buried in Google’s servers, because you can still find them. Here’s the About page, which will enable you to read other pages.
LM and DW face an expensive court battle, and are asking for donations to help defray their legal expenses. This website is providing information about a serious personality disorder. Hundreds of people have benefitted from ThePsychoExWife.com, and we know how helpful an online support group can be.
This is an important case for Lovefraud. We’ve run into First Amendment issues before. Phil Haberman was able to convince a family court judge in Florida that his ex-wife was stalking him when she wrote a blog exposing his military fraud. The Stolen Valor Act has been struck down, with federal judges ruling that the lies of men who claim to have won medals is protected speech.
Information about personality disorders needs to be made public, and frauds need to be exposed. But the law about blogs and the First Amendment is very unclear. So I’ve donated, and I encourage you to donate as well.
UPDATE:
ThePsychoExWife.com will be featured on the Today Show tomorrow morning. Tune in!
MoonDancer
hope your leg gets better onesteprs – that sounds like an awful ordeal..I bet your wore out tonite..
Ana
((((One Joy Step)))))
Jayzus!!! What the heck happened to you? Went for a swim and that did it…Lawdy.
Yeah, I’ll take the log cabin tooo.
Did you see my email about getting hacked??? This stinks..I
have been trying to contact just about every one in my email list..Ugh…very embarassing…Hope you will still contact me about the “door” LOL
Because: We are still here for you, Girly!
ErinBrock
Hey guys…..log cabins, n monsters, black germans, injuries…….I can relate! 🙂
Sky….be nice on those Black Germans….don’t want to upset my Holly girl! ALTHOUGH……she did meet a few of the neighbors *sigh* the other day….and she reminds me of ME! Nice until you fuck with her….THEN look out. She got into a brawl when a little dog and companion -golden first came inside Holly’s new house and helped themselves to her food….she just growled them off…..then went outside and one took her ball and one took her bone. THE NERVE of the one to drop her bone and NIP HER! It was war declared! OY VEY! It wasn’t pretty…..but ended with no injuries.
I’m totally out of the house….found some interesting things when I went back to take ONE last look around….but no moolah! Searched again though! 🙂
He’s been seen posting on FB that the courts took 50K and the EX stole 2mil from him……Since he’s only been married once….I guess he was referring to me….so I’m still wondering where that 2 mil is……and i’m taking that as a ‘tell’. Had to look.
He’s also been alienating the ‘girls’ from HS and Elementary on FB. They seem fiesty…..and didn’t hold back on telling him they all knew he was gay, just come out of the closet…..and that his claims of honesty were all lies…..go back to mamma and learn how to live on the right path, only then will you be happy! HA…..his jenga house is falling.
Spath roadmap. Loses me and kids…..runs mother and brothers off…..extended family excommunicate from him…..now the oldest ‘friends’….from grade school have discovered him. So…..he’s left with the 2 tropical states in which he’s got new dupes (or more recent dupes) and he’s spinning BIG TIME out of control……this should get real interesting now……it’s a good side show to watch occasionally from afar!!! And one which was predicted the minute i booted him.
So…..for those who are doubting….DON”T….it’s been 5 years since I booted him……and it’s a slooow process…..but eventually, peeps DO catch on….and when they do, we may or may not ever know about it….THAT”S where we MUST have faith in what we ‘know’!!!!
From my new home at the mountain top to all my friends at LF…..I think of you often and I trust you are all finding your ways with the evolution of the journey. It really IS everchanging and it really DOES get better!
XXOO
EB
one/joy_step_at_a_time
it really messed me up hens – the antibiotic messed up my stomach, body temp and bp and breathing. i am still shaking. I TOLD THEM TO USE THE OTHER ANTIBIOTIC THAT I HAD EARLIER THIS YEAR – BUT NOOOOO, THEY WANTED TO USE SOMETHING WITH A NARROWER SPECTRUM – but they didn’t tell me that – just that it ‘wasn’t right for the problem’. so cavalier with MY health. grrrrr. I have only ever been able to take 2 antibiotics without problems – and they chose not to use one of them. i am actually really angry about this.
at least I had my ipod with me and sang johnny cash tunes. 🙂
hopefully the one i have now will kick the infection. the red streak is it’s about 10 inches long and 4 inches wide….oy!
Hope to heal
One/Joy ~ Oh my! So sorry to hear of the doggone infection. Hopefully, once the “good” antibiotics get to work, you’ll be feeling better quick.
A log cabin sounds awesome to me too. As long as I’m dreaming though… It would be located in a large clearing with a spring fed pond in the middle of an evergreen forest. Sounds like heaven to me 🙂
one/joy_step_at_a_time
Ana – i feel in a crevice and cut my leg on the rocks in the lake yesterday. i expected a massive bruise and did all the right things for the tiny little gash and the bruising, but by this afternoon I knew i had an infection…..
i just got online, so i didn’t read that you got hacked…what happened?
one/joy_step_at_a_time
EB – haha, the teen girls got his number! douchebag!
one/joy_step_at_a_time
thanks hope2heal (i hope to heal too)
the reaction to the antibiotic was so wild. doctors are such dicks.
skylar
EB
I loved my black shepard so much and I miss him. They are such awesome dogs, so totally loyal.
Thanks for the uplifting message.
One Joy,
That’s terrible! The antibiotics are almost as bad as the injury, but we still have to be grateful because they generally do work. I wish I had some advice for your leg… ice?
How about a ((hug)) for moral support?
one/joy_step_at_a_time
HUGS, ONE JOY WANTS HUGS 🙂 !!
i don’t need to pout so much, but i am just gonna let myself do it.