Editor’s Note: Laughs in the e-mail today sent by a Lovefraud reader. Enjoy!
Narcissist sayings about themselves:
“A lie is as good as the truth if you can get someone to believe it.'”
“I’m really easy to get along with once you learn to worship me.”
About Narcissists:
“He was the only man I ever knew that could strut while sitting down.”
“Every narcissist woman wants a man she can look down on.”
“There’s nothing wrong with narcissists that reasoning with them won’t aggravate.”
“She was truly a legend in her own mind”
Things it is better NOT to say to a Narcissist:
“I’d love to stay and listen to you talk about yourself, but I gotta run.”
“Before you begin, may I adjust your crown?”
“They told me you weren’t foolish enough to lie all the time. I stuck up for you and said you were.”
“I will always cherish the initial misconceptions I had about you.”
“You were sent here as a warning to normal people, weren’t you?”
“Any connection between your reality and mine is purely coincidental.”
“Does this mean you’re about to rage? Would you mind doing something useful while you are at it, like getting me a beer and a sandwich?”
“You can’t be serious? Oh! Is this going to be on Candid Camera? Where’s the hidden camera? (begin looking)”
“300,000,000 sperm and YOU were the best they could find for the job?”
Other Narcissist riddles and sayings:
“A narcissist is someone who after taking the trash out, gives the impression he just cleaned the whole house.”
“How does a female narcissist sleep? First she lies on one side, then she lies on the other.”
What do you get when you cross the Godfather with a Narcissist? An offer you can’t refuse, but you can’t rely on either.”
“Hear about the terrorist that hijacked a 747 full of narcissists? He threatened to release one every hour if his demands weren’t met.”
“What do a narcissist and sperm have in common? Both have about a 1 in 3 million chance of becoming a human being.”
“Narcissists are one of the main sources of income for therapists. Not that they ever come for therapy themselves because they know they don’t need to. But just one narcissist can easily drive ten other people into long term therapy.”
Dear CaliJoe, thanks for the poem it is AWESOME and so expressive of our feelings as well. We were never good enough.
Welcome to love fraud, and glad you are here. There is much support, caring and empathy here because we are fellows on a journey with you toward healing. God bless.
Kim, thanks for the laugh. LOL.
ANewLily, Here is another perspective on laughing about the P’s. I just finished a book, called “The Myth of Irrationality” it discusses the way that laughter is used in many cultures to control anti-social behavior. When a person tries to hurt another, rather than punish with violence, the society mocks the person in order to change their mindset. The behavior is shamed in this way and the person controlled.
If you watch comedy central’s Jon Stewart show or the Colbert report, you will see that they are targeting all their jokes on narcissism in our society. It is Stewart’s way of dealing with his own anger and outrage at the evil in our society, without indulging in the hate-mongering that the narcissists do.
He is a genious.
I LOVED this post…many much-needed chuckles!
Skylar, I haven’t read the book you mentioned but from the title I wonder, is the author saying that “irrationaliy” is a myth?
If so, I’d have to say I don’t believe for a minute that my Ex’s irrationality was anything but real!
From your well-written description, I’d hazard a guess that shaming my EX would never have worked to “control” his mindset. He didn’t have any capacity for shame to begin with.
For example, I went through a period of thinking if society would go back to the public shaming by putting a person in the town square with hands and head locked into the stocks, behavior could be curtailed. As I thought about how pointless this shaming treatment would be for my EX I did laugh at the silly notion. His reaction when out of the stocks would be murderous rage against the persons who locked him up there and probably violent retribution as long as he lived.
I remember Will Rogers’ sometimes vitriolic humor and loved it. There aren’t any Will Rogers types around any more.
I just think my dislike of humor aimed at the P/S/Ns is that to me it is like laughing at a person with cerebral palsy or a physically disabled person.
But, that is just my opinion. I don’t expect others to feel the same way!! If that kind of laughter helps others deal with the pain, I say more power to them and I applaud them for using any “weaon” that will help them heal.
If the “Myth of Irationality” is in the library, I look forward to reading it. Thanks for the reference.
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ANewLily, I know what you mean about how they can be vengeful, but that is because they think that they will eventually get even. But not if you continue to laugh.
For example, my P, hated it when I drank every night. I drank because that is the only way I could stop the feeling of anxiety that I got from listening to his constant lies and gaslighting. The reason he hated it is because I would laugh at him no matter what he said, if I was drunk, it was funny. Very quickly, he gave up and would just sit and watch tv with me, sometimes even laughing too. But, he would start in on me the next morning.
We had some friends who drink heavily every night and they also laugh when drunk. He was always putting them down behind their backs for being drunks. I spoke with them recently and they told me that they would laugh at his gaslighting. Have you ever tried to scare a drunk? Not that easy, they think everything is funny.
The myth of irrationality is not really about narcissism but it touches slightly on it. It is about the development of the emotions in the brain. It refers to the american mythology of the individual as a loner/hero – the Clint Eastwood/Dirty Harry personality as a hero. It talks about the rise of individualism in western culture during the age of romanticism and how it has created the narcissistic culture of today. The book is very enlightening and helpful towards understanding how our childhood imprints us with who we become. It is helpful for putting all the other books which I’ve read on narcissism into a wider perspective. Highly recommended.
BTW, when I first left him, he kept going to my parents’ house and calling my mom and leaving horrible messages even though they ignored him. But then one day, he showed up when my mom was in her garden. He repeated the same old line about me being a drunk and a drug addict. My mom just laughed and laughed and he never came back.
Truly, laughter short circuits what they are after, which is fear.
http://www.borderlinepersonality.ca/bordernarcissism1.htm
After reading this I’m confused about how to tell if it’s bpd or narcissism. Can anyone explain the difference?
Donna I think you need to open a thread called “henry” so peeps can chose wether or not to hear the continuing saga of “as henry’s stomach Turns” – and if ya’ll havent firgured it out by now my keyboard is screwed up and I can not start a new paragraph – hence all the — — – ‘s – Has been an interesting evening and I need some advice. I have this “friend” off and on – depending on his current relationship status. The only time I hear from him is when he is fighting or being kicked out of his current relationship. We kind of had a fling years ago and there is always chemistry, he is a hunk of a man – a landscaper like myself – and I have always enjoyed his company because we have things in common and he is inteligent, and unlike my X S I do enjoy conversing with him about many things. wELL he showed up tonite unanounced after 1 year of silence..his cell number changes frequently…OK I know he is an S – figured that out long before I knew what they were…My question too you all is – maybe this can be just a platonic frienship? In the past when he is single he has bought me gifts that I did not want. And now he is Like “Oh I am so glad to see you and I missed you etc.” but I dont know if maybe I am paranoid about everybody or could this just be a true dude that occasionally needs a friend and someone to talk to and vent etc…? I know enuff about the current guy he is with to know that he provided my hunky landscaper friend with a much better “friendship” money wise, than my friendship has ever been able or willing to provide…should I lose his new cell number or be a friend?
Henry,
If he is a P, then of course you enjoyed his friendship, they are the most charismatic people you will ever meet.
Unless you are looking for drama, drop this guy – fast. He is a vampire looking for someone to feed on. You were next on his list. Just because he looks good, doesn’t mean he is good, you know how mesmerizing the P’s can be.
And they groom you. EVERYTHING HE SAYS WILL BE A LIE. So, you can expect him to mirror you and then tell you what you want to hear: we are just friends, you’re a good guy, I only want your friendship. Why would you want that in your life?
henry, I don’t know, this is beyond my expertise… in fact, I have no expertise! Half of my supposed gf’s never even call me, I’m sick of it, could your friendship really be platonic? Maybe you’d fall for him. I don’t want to see you get hurt, even over a friend, can they be friends? Or does he have some other motive? What’s your gut feeling about it?