Editor’s Note: Laughs in the e-mail today sent by a Lovefraud reader. Enjoy!
Narcissist sayings about themselves:
“A lie is as good as the truth if you can get someone to believe it.'”
“I’m really easy to get along with once you learn to worship me.”
About Narcissists:
“He was the only man I ever knew that could strut while sitting down.”
“Every narcissist woman wants a man she can look down on.”
“There’s nothing wrong with narcissists that reasoning with them won’t aggravate.”
“She was truly a legend in her own mind”
Things it is better NOT to say to a Narcissist:
“I’d love to stay and listen to you talk about yourself, but I gotta run.”
“Before you begin, may I adjust your crown?”
“They told me you weren’t foolish enough to lie all the time. I stuck up for you and said you were.”
“I will always cherish the initial misconceptions I had about you.”
“You were sent here as a warning to normal people, weren’t you?”
“Any connection between your reality and mine is purely coincidental.”
“Does this mean you’re about to rage? Would you mind doing something useful while you are at it, like getting me a beer and a sandwich?”
“You can’t be serious? Oh! Is this going to be on Candid Camera? Where’s the hidden camera? (begin looking)”
“300,000,000 sperm and YOU were the best they could find for the job?”
Other Narcissist riddles and sayings:
“A narcissist is someone who after taking the trash out, gives the impression he just cleaned the whole house.”
“How does a female narcissist sleep? First she lies on one side, then she lies on the other.”
What do you get when you cross the Godfather with a Narcissist? An offer you can’t refuse, but you can’t rely on either.”
“Hear about the terrorist that hijacked a 747 full of narcissists? He threatened to release one every hour if his demands weren’t met.”
“What do a narcissist and sperm have in common? Both have about a 1 in 3 million chance of becoming a human being.”
“Narcissists are one of the main sources of income for therapists. Not that they ever come for therapy themselves because they know they don’t need to. But just one narcissist can easily drive ten other people into long term therapy.”
Hi Muldoon…..hope you stay strong! You can do this! Good that the first weekend is almost over with, I would think!
Henry,
I am guessing the site was expereincing some problems last night because I lost a whole post to Shabby that I ended up reposting this morning. Anyway, your response to me was very thoughtful. Your comment about Mr. Right being a wildcard for you really struck me and I know why it did. Even with as much healing work as I have done, my own personal challenge right now is dealing with my fear that I am just not meant to find a partner in this lifetime. I don’t doubt that I am worthy of a loving relationship or that I wouldn’t be a wonderful partner with much to offer to someone on various levels.
But since I just can’t seem to find a realtionship I start thinking that I am just “meant” to spend the rest of my life alone. And, while I am comfortable with myself and who I am and being alone, I am a person who wants companionship and intimacy in my life. I am ok as I am but I’d like life better if I had a special someone. I tell myself over and over it shouldn’t be this hard to find someone and then of course I get thinking that being alone is just fate’s plan for me.
I can’t buy in to spending time with Mr. Right Now vs. Mr. Right either. My friend laughs at me that I can’t be washed up at 37 and can’t possibly think I am going to spend the rest of my life alone… but yet that is my fear, because maybe the alternative would mean settling and I just can’t do that. My therapist cautions me not to be self fullfill my destiny which annoys me too, because if I had other options I’d certainly explore them. She gets annoyed with me that I am accepting of a fate that I have no idea is my fate!
I’m starting to ramble a bit here and hope I haven’t bored you and anyone else reading this to tears. My real point is that I get what you were saying and I feel the same way with regard to my own fears. So, even though you’re not feeling too optimistic for yourself I hope you don’t mind though if I keep thinking good thoughts on your behalf!!
Hugs…
HP
muldoon… “so far so good” is fabulous! I’m walking the road right there with you, I have good days and bad days, you know what it’s like. you certainly have a way with words! just a few words… but they spoke volumes!
Hecates Path – I will be 55 in about 3 hours. You are 37. I have a son who is 34. Now excuse me while I run over to Oxy’s and get her cast iron skillet. Ok I am back -BOINK BOINK BOINK on your silly head. If I was straight I would marry you . You will not be alone the rest of your life. This Life Lesson you have been through with evil was for a reason. Your beauty comes through your typed words. You have set course a path – hecates path – destiny awaits you. I am not very eloquent with words, but I do feel that all of us have a better furure ahead of us even if it is alone. I crave companonship and intamcy also, but I remember how alone I was with him 3 feet away. I am an old white haired man and my chances of winning the lottery are better than finding Mr. Real. Your 37 – young and alive and a teacher at that..You just stop looking for Mr. Right and Mr. Real will find you…you just continue on your path miss hecates and life will be kind to you…..
Henry:
Double Nickels!!! Happy (early) Birthday, Henry!
Henry…
Excellent post to HP…very well said…all of us are on a journey…live in the moment… embrace what you have learned…remember knowledge is power but only when the knowledge is implemented. Think positive thoughts, protect yourself by respecting yourself…live and let live!
Happy Birthday 2hours early Henry! 55 means you still have 20-40 years to find Mr. Real…just continue on your path Mr. Henry and life will be kinder to you!!!
Actually, Henry, it is crazy that you mentioned your birthday, because I just got home from a birthday party. So, I am still in a partying mood.
Online Birthday Party for Henry, right now!!!
P.S. I am NOT as liquored up as I might sound.
Thank you Rosa and Learnthelesson – (protect yorself by respecting yourself) very good wisdom Learn….I remember when the speed limit was 55 – remember the drive 55 and stay alive signs? is 55 official senior status? I have been getting into movies as a senior for year’s!!! Oh my white hair – I went to target 7 years ago and when I checked out the girl said ” you should of came on Tuesday” I asked her why and she said “because Tuesdays seniors get a discount!” Oh that was a bad day – .
Oh Henry – lol – I was at a store last summer that had the same special/offer! The lady in front of me pulled out her license and got a special discount! When it was my turn… I jokingly said “Im 60, but left my license at home” the clerk got the biggest kick out of it AND GAVE ME THE DISCOUNT for my silliness!!! Age is nothing unless you’re cheese or wine!!!
Speaking of, CHEERS! Im with Rosa.. Cyber Celebration for Henry!!!! Happy Birthday to you (cha cha cha) !!! LOL about 55…you forgot the part about 55 being the new 45!!!! Have a wonderful day tomorrow!!!! xoxo
Henry:
Make sure you treat yourself really well on your birthday. Buy yourself a present, take yourself to dinner, whatever makes you happy.
I am not in a relationship, but I still buy myself a Christmas present AND birthday present every year.
And, remember, age is nothing but a number.
Clink, Clink…I am raising my glass and toasting to the 55th Anniversary of the day you were born!