If you think real people don’t get caught in dating scams, think again. Lovefraud heard from a woman who thought she met the soldier pictured above online. Actually, she met a group of scammers from Ghana. Here’s what she wrote:
According to a USAA Fraud Investigator 15 women scattered across the US (I was one of them) were recently scammed by a group from Ghana. I am not trying to get my money back, etc. In fact, I am being forced to file for bankruptcy.
What I am trying to do is help the Active Duty Army Master Sergeant who is in ALL the pictures these scammers still use! I saw a recent one posted under two i had added to one scam website. In fact, it could have been his recent retirement party. I just feel horrible that they continue to steal this same soldier’s pictures and want to know how I can get on some sites so these scammers can not CONTINUE.
The guy in the pictures was finally identified by the POW network. he was mortified that his photos were being used to scam people.
Kimberly – contact
info@pownetwork.org
Well that is a good thing at least that he has been identified…..Kim, I am so sorry you went through all this, but at least you are enlightened at this point in time!
We have all been “enlightened” the hard way but sometimes it is a blessing that keeps us from being scammed again.
This is WHY “on line” dating is a BADDDDDDD IDEA! People can “be” anyone. You build up this person in YOUR IMAGINATION from the fantasy they present and you are emotionally and hormonally hooked when they are a complete scam.
OxD……you are so doggoned SPOT-ON. SO spot-on!!!!
The poor guy in the photos……I wonder, now, if he’ll file a lawsuit or criminal complaint…..
He sure is attractive, though! (snort) Just because I’m not going to date doesn’t mean I’m dead!
In my years of using dating sites, there were several times when a guy would contact me claiming to be a soldier stationed in Alfghanistan or some place like that. (#1 red flag: I won’t get to know someone I cannot meet in person.) All of those times, the person who wrote to me “wrote” with an accent and did not sound American (#2 red flag). And finally, they would talk about how they think I am their true love in the first email (#3 and biggest red flag). I have found from my personal experience that it’s pretty easy to spot these scammers by the way they talk and the way they hone in right away. The best way to avoid them is not to be a long distance penpal with any of them.
All of the men I’ve actually met from dating sites (which is a very very small percentage of those who contacted me) turned out to be pretty decent people, but maybe just not attractive to me for whatever reasons – I’m pretty picky. I’ve made some good platonic friends from the sites though. For me, the answer is not just to abandon the sites, because it is just one more way to expand your dating social circle. But to just know how to read the signs. There was one I got to the phone call stage with. I could tell after one phone call that he was a predator by the way he tried to hone in on me and tell me that he was falling in love with me and would I consider meeting him at his house? (HUGE red flags). He also had an accent, but when I asked him what country he was from, he acted insulted and said “American, didn’t you read my profile?” RED FLAG. Fortunately, I never heard from him again. But the odds have been in my favor for meeting decent people. I do not think the large majority of people on dating sites are predators. After all, I’m not a predator. But they do exist. They are everywhere, and it’s good to know the signs. IMO, saying you’ll never use a dating site because there are predators there is like saying you’ll never go out for a drive because there are bad drivers out there. I think it’s better to know what your boundaries are and to just be careful. I have many friends who found their marriage partners on dating sites and are happily married. A lot of these scams can be avoided if you just avoid long distance and phone relationships with people you’ve never met. It is much easier for someone to deceive you in writing and by phone than in person.
The man in the photo is definitely eye candy.
I met a guy a few years back, first through a dating site, and then face-to-face because he lived in the town next to me.
We met for coffee, walked around a bit, and I picked up something in a store that I needed. MAYBE we spent a whole 4 hours together.
I come home to find an email saying how proud he was to be seen walking down the street with me. WHAT???
I immediately sent him an email saying that it wasn’t going to work between us.
Grace,
I had a similar experience when I was 17, right before I met the spath. I went out with a guy who was drop dead gorgeous, 35 years old and looked 21. All the women at work wanted to go out with him. After one date, he said something like, “I’m usually looking at other couples walking around holding hands, and now I’m the one holding hands with someone.” He was practically giddy.
It was such a turn off. Then I met the spath. Urgh. Should’ve stuck with the giddy gorgeous guy.
Skylar, I hear you! The article about the time wasted with the spaths really hits home for me…..
Oh, well! I’m going to learn how to love myself, for a change, and stop wasting that valuable energy on some man-child.
I’ve heard from 2 more women this week who were contacted by people who stole this soldier’s identity. Here is what they wrote:
Here I’m e-mailing the letters and photo of the army soldier that I know wasn’t the right man in the photo. Back in January of 2012 I was in the christian chat prayer room with some best friends chatting over bible verses. When suddenly this man by the name of Captain William Hellmuth came on joining in with the christian chatting he kept on days after days listening to the word of GOD . We be came close friends I ask him if he had a web cam so that I could see who he was. AT the army is so security you can’t communicated with outsider he said. Captain began to e-mail tons of letters, which I didn’t realize he was playing with my emotion. It got to the point that I was sending him care packages and money and other items. This went on for months until my feeling for him was so much that I everything I owe I had given up for this soldier. Until now I realize he had ruin my reputation and use my emotions and stole money from me. I contacted the FBI and the POWNETWORK at this moment they are investigating him. So I have block my e-mail and yahooim.I don’t want anymore woman to be a victim like I was. I’m now in therapy with my emotion and being a victim. Please ladies don’t fall for this man he’s a scammer. I wish I could contact the real person in the photo to let him know someone is useing his photo to get women.
This woman was from Germany;
Unter Tränen, aber mit hellem Verstand habe ich nach genau diesem Mann/Fotos gesucht. Ich komme aus Deutschland und wurde auf einer Singlebörse angeschrieben. Ich hatte schon ein komisches Gefühl, leider habe ich Fotos von mir und meinen Kindern gesendet. Ich hoffe nur das der echte James….,dem die Fotos gehören endlich in Ruhe gelassen wird. Ich habe noch mehr Fotos bekommen, auch Kinderfotos von ihm.
Es ist bitter, so mit Gefühlen von Frauen zu spielen.
Translation:
In tears, but with a bright mind, I was looking for exactly this man / photos. I am from Germany and was written on a single exchange. I had a strange feeling, unfortunately, I have sent pictures of me and my children. I just hope …. that the real James, where the photos are finally left alone. I got some more pictures, including photos of children from him.
It is bitter, so play with feelings of women.
Donna……godalmighty, it just makes my blood run like icewater to read these pitiful cries of agony.
I sincerely hope that the people who perpetrated these crimes and the identity theft are prosecuted to the fullest extent of the Law.
This is precisely why I will not even entertain the notion of online dating OR “assisting” other people who appear to be in need, online. Oh, on this site, I offer as much emotional and spiritual support as I can to the victims. But, I’m not going to send money, give out my personal contact information, or other means to reach into my life. Most of the readers on this site appear to be quite genuine. Others – recently a RASH of them – appear to be on this site to fulfill other purposes than healing.
Caution…..caution…..caution…..
May these victims and survivors find some justice and comfort
Well here I am heartbroken that my beautiful man, Daniel is a scam. I love this man and he has said he loves me. We talk several times a day and I have provided him with gifts, pictures, money and even one of my rings. We were to be married when he comes home from Afghanistan. I cannot believe I have been so foolish and stupid. He has even provided me with his military ID showing his name as Daniel Roble James and that he is in active duty. I had checked other sites that report dating scams and found nothing, so I thought he was the real deal. Now I am heartsick. I am a widow and never wanted to marry again, but I would have married the man I know as Daniel in a heartbeat. We have had a wonderful time together and I cannot believe it is over. My friends all warned me,but I would not listen. I loved that he told me how beautiful I am and that he sent flowers. I will miss the man I have been talking to he made me laugh and feel loved again. What do I do now with all these emotions?