Melinda Jane Kellogg holds a Ph.D. in physics. Jeff Rense has an alternative radio program. Kellogg listened to the program for more than two years, and then, on Rense’s birthday, sent him a “Happy Birthday” email. He responded, they corresponded, they visited, they married. It didn’t turn out as Kellogg expected, and she tells the whole story—complete with documentation—on her website.
Visit Melinda Jane Kellogg
Link supplied by two Lovefraud readers.
UPDATE: More of the story is available on HenryMakow.com.Â
Donna Andersen
I think Melinda showed tremendous courage in posting her website and we should honor that courage. She took on a bigger challenge most of us, because she was involved with a semi-famous person. (Although my ex claimed to be famous, he was, in reality, a nobody.)
She is raw. She is trying to escape.
Please remember what it was like when you were still trapped, shocked by the betrayal, and without resources. I think the Lovefraud community should be supportive of this brave woman.
bluejay
Donna,
Melinda’s beginning with her ex-spath, Jeff, was fast, quick. I agree that we should be supportive of her. In my opinion, this woman had a heavy-duty crash course in psychopathy, whereas, it took me years (I had red flags waving in my face along my road) to figure out that my ex-spath was disordered. I’d been somewhat “prepared” for what lay ahead, discovering the truth about him in a slow-but-sure way. She got married and, BAM, her head was starting to spin due to his craziness. I am absolutely amazed that she didn’t end up in a psych ward because everything that she experienced (in such a short period of time) was intense. Even when I learned the truth about my ex-spath (figuring out that he’s a spath), I held onto the hope that he could be helped, change, but in time, I finally accepted the fact that he is permanently damaged, no-one being able to make him well. Melinda has my sympathy.
20years
Dear Melinda,
My heart goes out to you for what you are going through, right now. It is indeed true that you have had a very harsh, very sudden experience of the cruel betrayal by a psychopath and all that that does to a person.
And for you it happened after many years of a normal, well-adjusted, peaceful and empowered life. You certainly did not see this coming. I think these experiences are different for everyone, and yours has been very tough on you.
Some of us here are a bit further along in our journeys, or we have had different experiences. I do think that most everyone here is very well meaning in our postings. Though it does not always come across that way.
You certainly did NOT bring it on yourself. You do not deserve what has happened to you.
I can tell that you have a lot of strength in you, you always did, and you will get strong again.
I am thankful that you created your website. It helped me very much to read what you wrote. I found it very validating.
It does not matter to ME, the purpose for which you wrote it. I am grateful that you chose to. I am honored to be a witness to your sharing of your experience, and I cheer you on.
I hope you can get to a place soon where you can heal from your adrenal exhaustion/failure, and repair and restore your health and rebuild your life.
Blessings to you.
Stargazer
Mindy, I’m so very sorry for all you have been through and all you are going through. I wish you recovery and health beyond what you even dream for. He doesn’t deserve to take so much of your life force from you. I hope you find it in you to take it back. He is a big fish in a little pond and will probably continue to play his games and wield the power he has. I don’t know if there is any way you can take him down, but maybe just finding some way to protect yourself so you can move on. What a nightmare!
There are so many reasons why to avoid having telephone romances and e-relationships (in spite of the fact that I know several that have turned into happy marriages). Mindy, yours is the biggest reason. I am one who has always fallen fast and hard for a man, and even had one that I fell for after 6 weeks of emailing, then went to meet him. Even without the possibility of dealing with a sociopath, there is just too much room for falling in love with a fantasy. If I take anything away from your story and the stories of others here (including my own run-in with a spath), it is to get to know someone really well – in person – before getting too involved, especially before sleeping with him. It was a hard lesson to learn, but people can pretend to be anything they want. You really need to observe a person over a long period of time. Even then, you can still get duped, but at least you have a shot at seeing a few of the red flags. When people hide behind emails and telephones, they can pretend to be whatever they want.
Thanks for sharing your story.
Truthspeak
MelindaKellogg, going “No Contact” is one of the most difficult and painful processes of recovery, and it is the first of many painful processes in healing.
The majority of the readers and posters on this site have had similar experiences to yours – sudden “love,” then immediate discard. The only way that I was able to process what I experienced was through counseling therapy with someone who “gets it.”
It is also important to recognize that people (women, particularly) who are exiting an abusive relationship typically develop chronic medical and auto-immune issues. There’s a direct correlation between negativity and physical health, and I completely understand how damaging this is because of my own health issues.
What is vital to recognize in your specific situation is that the spath has a medium to work with. All attempts to “out” him for what he’s done could result in legal catastrophe and a lifetime of continued misery – literally. Of course, you’re raw, damaged, and furious! Shouldn’t you be? Having said that, you need every bit of precious energy to devote to your personal recovery and healing.
I’m in the same situation of being homeless. I have very, very difficult decisions to make in the immediate future. My health has taken a turn for the worse as a result of my current situation, and I have a choice: deal with it, or succumb. I refuse – simply refuse – to give the exspath any more of my precious time. I also refuse to give any more of my Self (who I am) to my colleague and his g/f that I’ve been renting a room from for a while. Whatever happens, I’m out – peace, OUT!
Now, there are only 2 things in this lifetime that any human being “has to do.” That’s pay taxes, and die. In between that time, I have choices that I can make, and after spath entanglements, none of those options are warm and fuzzy – they are all difficult, painful, and wretched. So, I’m going to have to get myself out of my current situation, get into a living situation, and get help for myself through whatever local domestic violence/abuse agency there is, and heal myself. I am sick, I am tired, and I am destitute, but I’m not in today’s Obituaries, and I’ll be dammed if I am going to give the exspath the “WIN” by spending another minute of my valuable time to expose him. He’ll do that, himself. I’m not going to attempt to “warn” anyone, either, because I don’t know if I would have heeded anyone’s warning about him had I been approached.
I wish you all of the very best in your recovery and healing processes, Melinda. It’s not an “easy” task, nor is healing a comfortable process, at all. It’s painful, it’s shocking, and it’s brutal…..but, the personal epiphanies about me (who I am) have been priceless, and I am grateful that I’m no longer bonded to the exspath, regardless of what I’ve lost.
Brightest and most sincere blessings
20years
Hell hath no fury like a sociopath “outed,” yes indeed. His response is typical, and I like your description of him as a grade-A, top notch sociopath. I might also add, “garden variety.” Maybe the big difference here is he is wealthy and famous and has a lot of force behind his push-back.
But his way of operating is totally typical and predictable. Textbook.
(in its awful ugliness)
The Liar loves his mask and will protect it at any cost (I can only imagine a wealthy and famous person would be especially tenacious about this), and hates Truth and Light and will do anything to stamp it out. And remember, they only play one game: “I win — and you lose.” That is one of the very hard things about standing up to it. They rarely slink away.
Keep thinking powerful thoughts, Mindy. I think you are on the right track.
spoon
There are two more pages of this at the link
http://www.henrymakow.com/cgi-bin/mt/mt-search.cgi?search=Jeff+Rense&IncludeBlogs=1&limit=20
Jeff Rense’s 1st Wife Describes his Cheating
May 27, 2012 3:20 PM
left, First wife Janet was a 19-yr-old UCSB cheerleader. (This isn’t her.) “I got an STD from Jeff because of his cheating.””I had post-traumatic stress disorder due to the marriage and wish I had gotten some counseling.”[Editor’s Note: Janet, the first of Jeff Rense’s seven-plus wives,* (married in 1969) is
Control Freak: Jeff Rense Couldn’t Keep a Job
May 6, 2012 6:10 PM
(Jekyll & Rense: A Third Ex-Wife Speaks, Part Two”Jeff needed to be in control … As a result, I saw him get fired and/or quit a number of his TV station jobs because of his personality problem.”MAKOW NOTE: I was not married to Jeff Rense but we had a fruitful
Jekyll & Rense: A Third Ex-Wife Speaks
May 5, 2012 8:29 PM
“I asked him why he’d changed? He said that before we were married, we were in the “courting stage” and that he was showing me what I wanted to see. He had acted out a charade.”MAKOW NOTE: I was not married to Jeff Rense but we had a fruitful 12-year
Rense & Icke – Birds of a Feather?
April 28, 2012 4:59 PM
(left, Jeff Ricke, disinfo specialist?) David Icke couldn’t defend JR’s suppression of the Fukushima conspiracy theory. He posted it himself. Instead he stooped to ad hominem attacks. L.C. Vincent reports on a topic Icke won’t touch. “The DI specialist intertwines approximately 15% bogus information with 85% true and verifiable information.
“I know Jeff Rense as a Predator” – Part Two
April 15, 2012 10:07 AM
Suezan is one of a long trail of women maimed by marriage/engagement to Jeff Rense (left in 1976)Here she concludes her recollections of a “predator” who parades as an “American Treasure…known as a consummate journalist and patriot and equally known for his kindness, loyalty, sensitivity, compassion and intelligence.”
“I know Jeff Rense as a Predator” – Ex-Wife #3
April 11, 2012 12:12 PM
“One night, he got out his gun, a .357 magnum I believe…. The gun was pointed at me and he then “acted” out an attempt to commit his own suicide with the gun to his head.”(Editor’s Note: If this article were about Henry Kissinger or Milt Romney, “Patriots” would be
“Pay-triots” — All Show and No Go
March 5, 2012 9:23 AM
(left, Al Thompson)Whether it is controlled opposition or idiocy, the fact is that the “Truthers” get no results. No problem ever gets fixed; it always gets worse. Even a blind squirrel gets a nut every once in awhile.by Al Thompson(henrymakow.com) You said:”I am sorry that many people do not have
Is the Truth Movement Controlled Opposition?
March 1, 2012 12:13 PM
Mike Phillips argues thatmuch of the alternative media is “simulated opposition.” by Mike Phillips(henrymakow.com) The comment by Jeff Rense’s 9th Ex-Wife Megan caught my eye, “For all you who wonder is Jeff Cointelpro??? No, Jeff Rense is controlled by no one. He is a lone nutter.”It is possible that Rense
Jim Stone is the Real Deal
March 1, 2012 10:36 AM
(left. David Janssen in “The Fugitive.” We do not have Jim Stone’s real name and pic. He is on the run.)Why is the so-called “alternative” media shunning this courageous man and his groundbreaking work? You shall know them by their fruits. Do men gather grapes of thorns, or figs of
David Icke Forgot Who He Is
February 29, 2012 5:40 PM
David Icke is so busy reminding us who we are, (“Love, God is Love”) he has forgotten who he is. That makes him a hypocrite. by Henry Makow Ph.D.David Icke’s readers can tell the difference between right and wrong, but apparently David can’t. He has kicked me off his site for
The Jeff Rense File
February 25, 2012 8:10 PM
“A Psychopath will always let you down..” -reader Articles dealing with Jeff Rense in Sequence( Rense terminated a valuable 12-year relationship because I posted Jim Stone’s theory about Fukushima on my website. First, Rense said he would not post my link. I said fine. I didn’t mind. But when I
My Masochistic Marriage to Jeff Rense
February 24, 2012 7:28 PM
In love with “Good Jeff” while keeping “Bad Jeff” at bay, I was becoming as crazy as he. Now that I won’t have to see either again, my recovery can begin.This is the final installment of “Jeff Rense’s Seventh* Ex-Wife Speaks Out” Part One is here. Part Two is here.
The “Spy” Who Loved Jeff Rense
February 23, 2012 10:01 PM
(left – Jeff and “Megan” in Oct. 2011) On occasions he would become even colder than usual. He would stare at me intensely and accuse me of being a spy, sent to poison him.(This is Part II of “Jeff Rense’s Seventh* Ex-Wife Speaks Out.” Part One is Here. ) “A
Jeff Rense’s Seventh Ex-Wife Speaks Out (Part 1)
February 23, 2012 6:59 AM
(left, Jeff Rense and “Megan” got married at a Santa Booth in Dec. 2010. This is a wedding picture.) “Jeff Rense on air is the sweetest, smartest, gentlest man around. But the real Jeff Rense is a monster… Rense.com is a business, pure and simple.”A psychopath will ALWAYS let you
Jeff Rense is “The Bachelor”
February 22, 2012 1:29 AM
When not posing as “an American Treasure, consummate journalist and patriot,” Jeff Rense has been living yet another fantasy. He is “The Bachelor.”This fight represents a winnowing of the “Truth” movement, separating the wheat from the chaff. Should our own leaders be put to the same standard as Herman Cain,
Real Men Would Defend US Women
February 19, 2012 11:17 AM
Real men would defend US women from the onslaught of feminism and the satanic Illuminati media. Cowards enjoy their degradation or run off to Asia. by BG(henrymakow.com)Jo said (February 17, 2012):”It takes two to tango. Women are the problem because you don’t want to stand up and tell the woman
Jeff Rense Has Been Married Nine Times
February 18, 2012 6:20 AM
Above, one slick dude(“Jeff Rense Steps in It” -Updated)On Thursday Jeff Rense replied to my article , “The Hidden Jeff Rense” without extending the common courtesy of linking to it. Of course, he vowed never to link to my site again, something he considers a trivial matter. My crime? Posting
bluejay
Mindy,
Apparently another web site (look at Spoon’s post) has exposed your ex, Jeff, for the slime ball that he is. You’re not alone now in getting the truth out about him. People will look at him with a different set of eyes.
When you’re in the “thick of it,” it’s hard to think and see straight. For a while, I felt like a zombie, having been absolutely wiped out by all the awful experiences that I had (I was constantly anxious) – it was unending headaches coming straight from my ex-spath. Once you get away, go no contact, you can get back to normalcy, recover from the craziness (although this will take who knows how long). Good luck to you.
mindykellogg
I and one of Jeff’s ex-girlfriends tracked down all the ex-wives. It was I who contacted them and spoke to them about their experiences on the phone, and then asked if they would go public. 3 of the 6 agreed! (The other 3 had corroborating stories, just did not want to go public.)
This was all my and the other exes work. It was months and months of work…
darwinsmom
mindykellogg and Diane,
Thank you for explaining why you needed to show every detail of all of your life. It must be excruciatingly painful to be cornered in such a way that you have to defend almost all of your life to the public on the internet.
I do not think that most comments before Diane’s were trying to blame you except for one. But I do understand that at the stage you are in, any type of comment that is somewhat sceptic of the helpfulness of your tactic is extremelu hurtful and feels like blaming.
Let me assure you, I don’t blame you. I cannot blame you, because I have exposed the unfamous (but infamous) ex-spath on exposion sites myself last year. I did it to do what I felt was my responsibility: to leave a background trail about him if his name was googled. I had pretty much forgotten about it when easter came around and all of a sudden I was harrassed, threatened and emotionally blackmailed over it. By then I was at a total different stage of healing, having been NC for little less than a year with both him and the new woman whom I regard a warned victim. So, I eventually got rid of those profiles about him, on my terms though (a personal, extremely polite request from him). Had he kept up the harrassment over it, I would have kept it indefinitely. Though I got rid of it, I never blamed myself for making it, nor did I reget making it. At the time I did it, it needed to be done imo. Don’t regret getting rid of it either. Because that too needed to be done by that point, not for him, but for myself. By then it felt like it was some contact line I had created myself, and ‘no contact’ at all levels was what I wanted to enforce by then. But I didn’t give a rat’s ass about his threats, or his enablers trying to appeal to me to honour my friendship with me (I blocked them).
So, I’m not blaming you. At this moment you are doing for yourself what you feel is of a priority to you in order to heal. It is courageous what you are doing, aside from painful, as well as honestly vulnerable. To stand up and show yourself vulnerable is a courageous act.
As an aside I admire your physics accomplishments… I am at the end of my first bachelor in physics (going for a second master I hope). Anyway, back to studying metrics and coordinate conversions for my exam on Monday.
Mindy, I wish you all the best and look forward to seeing you around here 🙂 Donna is indeed the best!