How to recognize and recover from everyday sociopaths - narcissists

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83-year-old serial killer proves that sociopaths don’t change

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Twice, Harvey Marcelin, 83, was convicted of murdering and dismembering girlfriends. Marcelin spent more than 50 years in prison for the gruesome crimes, and was paroled in 2019. After his release, he started identifying as a woman. Marcelin was placed at the George Daly House, a short-term housing alternative for seniors in New York City. Marcelin’s behavior frightened Monica Archer, a case worker there, and she repeatedly warned her superiors about the threats he made. Archer’s concerns were ignored, and Marcelin was moved into an individual apartment. A week later, Marcelin allegedly murdered and dismembered another woman, 68-year-old Susan Leyden. Leyden’s leg was found on a street in B …

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Sociopaths use our self-image against us

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UPDATED FOR 2022: The goal of exploiters and manipulators is to bring us under their control. Here's one of their key strategies: Sociopaths use our self-image against us. We all have a mental picture of ourselves. We may think of ourselves as smart, kind, creative, professional, competent or loving. We may also have negative views of ourselves, such as disorganized, overweight, temperamental, fearful or lazy. Generally, our overall self-image is a collection of what we consider to be our assets and liabilities. According to the Cleveland Clinic, this mental picture is learned. They write: Self-image is a product of learning. Early childhood influences, such as parents and caregivers, …

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I married a psychopath while he was in jail

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Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following story from a reader whom we’ll call Marianne22. She married a psychopath while he was in jail. Met my psychopath (clinically diagnosed) while working at a correctional institution (shame & stupidity felt even now after 28 years). At this time I didn't know about his diagnosis. His indulgent family After his release it became apparently clear that he came from a family (10) that was privileged and personal needs & wants were met at any expense. Slowly at first I started recognizing behaviors that I began to question but always found excuses to downplay his disappearing games, flirtatious contacts and his never ending personal n …

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Gaslighting — 5 key points you need to understand

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Awareness of phenomenon that all of us at Lovefraud and throughout the survivor community have been talking about for years has gone mainstream — gaslighting. In fact, the Merriam Webster Dictionary named “gaslighting” as the word of the year for 2022. Gaslight was the title of a play written in 1938, which was made into a movie in 1944 starring Ingrid Bergman and Charles Boyer. The story is about a con man who marries a young heiress. As he searches for jewels that he believes are hidden in her home, he tries to make his wife believe she is going crazy. He hides things and then asks her what she did with them. He causes the gaslights to dim and brighten, and when his young wife notices, tel …

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Ex-cop killed his former girlfriend and then himself, prosecutor says

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A terrible story was on the front page of my newspaper this morning: Yesterday, a local ex-cop killed his former girlfriend and then himself. William W. Beattie, 47, once a police officer in Atlantic City, New Jersey, forced his way into the home of Erin A. Gatier, 47, in Deptford Township, New Jersey, shot her and then shot himself, according to the Press of Atlantic City. The story had only a couple of comments about Beattie’s disposition, but they are telling. Matt Greenberg, a former co-worker of the victim, had an unfriendly email exchange with Beattie, in which the ex-cop told him to stay away from Erin. He said, according to the news account, “She did admit to me that he was pro …

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