Editor’s note: The following story was sent to Lovefraud by a reader whom we’ll call “Sherri-Lynn.”
I was married to a sociopath for fifteen years. I was with this man for nearly eighteen years. We have two children together.
This man lied to me for fifteen years about “our retirement plan.” The money that funded this so-called retirement plan was gifted to my ex and I every year at Christmas from his mother and stepfather.
The money was in the form of stocks that were electronically put into our stock portfolio. Statements arrived in the mail every month or so addressed to both he and I. My name was on every account, statement, summary etc. I had my own retirement plan (a small one ) that my ex-husband convinced me to roll over into our combined plan.
My ex-husband lied to me for fifteen years that this was indeed a retirement plan. He insisted that I should not work in my specialized field because we didn’t need the money nor did we need to supplement our retirement fund or have an additional retirement plan because we had “plenty of money in our existing plan.”
Ten years into the marriage he started to abuse me mentally, emotionally and physically. I had noticed (finally) that he was lying about everything, even the smallest and silliest things.
He would lie about money, where he was going, who he was with, even how much he would spend on a bottle of Bourbon”¦!
The man would want to have sex everyday and fall asleep afterwards like a baby.
This bastard lied and cheated me out of a million dollar retirement plan. There was no retirement plan!! It was a trust fund intended for him only.
Yes, my name was on all the statements and documents.
Yes, he told me once a month how much money was in our fund!
Yes, he and his parents lied and betrayed me (the mother of his children and their grandchildren) for fifteen years!
I divorced him three years ago but the trauma and pain hasn’t gone away.
I was married to a stranger, a sociopath, a liar, a betrayer. That man lied to me every day about my future, my livelihood for our entire marriage.
I am still sick over this. Not the money so much as the betrayal, the lies.
He is a sick person, mean and demented. He always said I was too good for him; too attractive, too smart, too worldly. I wasn’t so smart after all.
I saw the red flags, the warning signs. I loved the man; I trusted him and he shattered my world. If Love Fraud were a crime punishable by law, this sociopath would be in prison.
I worry so much about my children, I worry that his DNA is part of them. God help them.
Thank you for reading my story. This is just a brief re cap of my nightmare with this demon.
I would never ever want to see this happen to another women. Ever.
Sherri-Lynn, thank you for having the courage to share your story. Not an easy thing to do.
I am shaking my head at all the trail of destruction these evil people leave behind. Like you, my ex took me for everything. I left with nothing. The only true blessing is we are both free. Free to think on our own & free from hell.
It’s sad that these evil people have existed in our world since the beginning of time but women especially are not warned fully about them until it’s too late. We are taught to “work hard on a marriage”…that “relationships are hard work”…I know now that no if you are with the right person it is not “hard work” it is work, it is compromising” but it is not a daily roller coaster ride of lies and deceit.
What I also now know is by being educated…I would never have gotten married & I know I will never marry again. Yes, maybe a committed relationship but I will never be trapped in a relationship again were I need a Judge to give me permission to end my relationship.
Not sure how young your children are but check out the side Onemomsbattle. com & their Facebook page.
Hugs to you 🙂 Thank you again for sharing your story.