In the wake of Weinergate, CNN posted an article entitled, Stop calling Huma Abedin a victim. Abedin, of course, is Anthony Weiner’s wife, who I’m sure was, at the very least, embarrassed by the scandal, and perhaps angry enough to consider divorce.
The article quotes a couple of authors telling women to choose not to be victims. Instead, women should choose to define their own happiness. Oh, there are a couple of caveats—the advice doesn’t apply to women who fear for their safety or are facing financial ruin. But there is no discussion of what to do when your relationship is so emotinally abusive that you are psychologically traumatized.
In short, this story offers advice for women coping with infidelity whose partners are not sociopaths. Which is fine—these women need advice as much as anyone. But the article also reinforces society’s “just get over it” attitude, which makes life difficult for women dealing with true exploitation.
Read Stop calling Huma Abedin a victim on CNN.com.
behind_blue_eyes
Skylar;
Funny, my fatal flaw is the quiet ones. I am thinking I need to seek more outgoing people…
Louise
skylar:
I have mentioned that many times on here how I just don’t get excited about “nice” men. They are so boring to me and that scares me. It scares me that I will never be able to love a normal, nice man. We have all talked about that before here. Sigh.
ElizabethBennett
I am feeling really horrible right about now. I can’t believe this is happening.
Louise
Sorry, Lizzy… 🙁
ElizabethBennett
thanks Louise. I thought that I would end up being disappointed when I came out to her and found out that she wasn’t interested, but instead I am grieving over the fact that she is a narcissist and infinitely worse than my last girlfriend. It’s such a gigantic let down and disappointment and it really hurts. Being a narcissist is worse than her being totally straight and not interested because now I know that we really didn’t even have a true friendship and I am already worried about what it’s going to feel like to say goodbye to her for 3 months if I get this job. It’s going to SUCK. I am going to have to pray so hard for GOD to give me a really stiff upper lip so I can handle it.
behind_blue_eyes
Louise;
Funny, I get burned by me who are externally nice: attractive yet unassuming, polite, well-mannered, even somewhat shy.
Internally, all three had deep, deep issues.
Louise
BBE:
That’s kind of weird, huh?? Hmmmm, that is very interesting. I wonder if anyone on here has insight into that?
behind_blue_eyes
Louise;
Maybe I was of the thinking that such people could be trusted. I never trusted a person more than my x-spath and look what happened there…
Interestingly, I am very good at spotting and avoiding Narcissists, BS artists and other schemers. Thus, its easy to see why a quiet sociopath would be particularly difficult for me.
Louise
BBE:
Yeah, the quiet ones are much harder to spot. Too sad for you on that one 🙁
behind_blue_eyes
Louise;
Its telling that initially, I thought I was the one who deserved to be dumped: insulting his “British reservedness” by asking him back to my place, then later on perhaps making things too “cosy” too soon, finally being honest about an HIV scare, along with several other things I had done…
Its just so shocking, and of course telling, when you find out the truth about somebody. And when that truth is 180 degrees opposite of what you thought, you are dealing with a sociopath, plan and simple.
At least with Narcissists, to some degree you know that you have, however toxic. With sociopaths, you do not know what you have until its too late…
I think Donna needs a poster with a list of “watch-outs.”