In the wake of Weinergate, CNN posted an article entitled, Stop calling Huma Abedin a victim. Abedin, of course, is Anthony Weiner’s wife, who I’m sure was, at the very least, embarrassed by the scandal, and perhaps angry enough to consider divorce.
The article quotes a couple of authors telling women to choose not to be victims. Instead, women should choose to define their own happiness. Oh, there are a couple of caveats—the advice doesn’t apply to women who fear for their safety or are facing financial ruin. But there is no discussion of what to do when your relationship is so emotinally abusive that you are psychologically traumatized.
In short, this story offers advice for women coping with infidelity whose partners are not sociopaths. Which is fine—these women need advice as much as anyone. But the article also reinforces society’s “just get over it” attitude, which makes life difficult for women dealing with true exploitation.
Read Stop calling Huma Abedin a victim on CNN.com.
oh yes, I am jealous Star…
that’s good you can keep yourself busy.
It will help you a lot in the healing process….
I was thinking today I need to bury myself into something productive and worthwhile…
after this red chillable; hehehehe
Have a great evening everyone….
*HUGS*
The Dupedster
Congrats Lizzy!!! I’m so happy for you. Things are going to work out because you need a job AND a break from the neighbor lady.
Star…
um, when I met the spath, I was dating about 8 guys. I made it clear to him and to everyone else that I didn’t want commitment, I had just broken off my engagement to my childhood sweetheart. But spath pushed the issue and insisted that he was “a one woman man”. I never doubted it. We lived together, we spent all our time together. But while I was at work, he was screwing 12 year old girls in my bed. And at night he would go off with his buddys…sometimes…they were always young blond men. Now I realize he was screwing them too.
A truely evil spath will hide what he is. It’s not that the red flags weren’t there, it’s just that I didn’t know what they were. And on top of that, once we are emotionally committed, we make excuses about how he walks like a spath and quacks like a spath, but he’s not a spath because we love each other.
Be happy and safe Star.
I can’t even think of dating at this point.
I wonder if I will ever let another man around me again.
Take care…
Dupedster
(((((((((((((((((((( Lizzy )))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
I’m SO HAPPY for you!!!! It’s about time something really positive happened for you!
Congratulations! I hope this finds you feeling relieved!
LL
skylar: oh yes! you said:
“A truely evil spath will hide what he is. It’s not that the red flags weren’t there, it’s just that I didn’t know what they were. And on top of that, once we are emotionally committed, we make excuses about how he walks like a spath and quacks like a spath, but he’s not a spath because we love each other.”
Don’t “I” know THAT feeling! Wow! You sure hit the nail on the head with that statement. Absolutely. GASLIGHTING MASTERS.
My x always tried to ‘hide’ himself and so charming!
I think I perhaps, along with the other women in his past, who have tried to love “IT” would probably say the same thing. I think I was the only one who wasn’t beaten along the way and that’s only because IT WOULD HAVE GOTTEN CREAMED and THEN PUT IN JAIL! And, it knew it. It at least got THAT ‘big picture’ if nothing else. Yes, tricky and sneaky and not to be trusted. All the pretty words in the world could not make me ever trust it again. Never.
Let me be the one who takes the key, locks the door and throws the key in the ocean. LET ME BE THAT ONE. And, “THIS” used to call “ITSELF” MY BEST FRIEND. Definitions sure do change over the course of a lifetime; don’t they? They must.
Thanks for being around and here for me all day, you guys.
It has been a rough week for me this week for some reason.
Just haven’t been ‘all here’. Flashbacks have been hitting me real hard and they are horrendous! I will be alright. I have a therapy session tomorrow and it always seems to calm me down…. next week is a new week; another chance for new beginnings.
*BLESSINGS TO YOU ALL*
DUPED
Star- it wouldn’t be a real arrest for smoking. It’s Captain Heather’s attempt to get me to stop by publicly handcuffing me in the street in front of everybody. There is no reconciliation with the lady because I never separated from her. Thanks for all the best wishes ya’ll. I’m excited but nervous.
Star I have a job to support my eating addiction and my 3 wieners have the same addiction. I am invious of people who really love their job’s, people who look forward to going to work. I am not lazy but I would love to be able to stay home and work on my farmette, grow veggies and have a zoo of farm critters, and I wont ever win the lottery because I dont ever buy a ticket, so to work I must go.
Star,
thanks for the big hug ((sweetie)), but this didn’t happen this week, it happened when I was 17! 🙁 That’s when I met the evil spath.
I kind of have had a rough week, because I can’t sleep well and I then I drink too much caffeine, then I can’t sleep and well… you know, it’s that vicious cycle. I should find my ipod and listen to my hypnosis tape again.
It’s very cool that you are having such a fun time dating. That’s the best part of being single, so live it up. Just keep your radar up, that’s all I’m saying. It can happen to anyone, at any time. They look for happy people that they can suck energy and emotions from. No matter how you feel about these guys, keep your eyes and ears open, get to know them and most of all, watch for contradictory behavior/speech. Spaths like to test us, so you might hear it in the contradictions they throw out.
Sky You have so much insight to the motives of exploitive people. What is your relationship like with your current BF?
The further removed I get from my relationship with the bad seed, the more I recognize how I saw the red flags, even realized he was a bad seed then, but it was like being in quicksand and he was the only one with a rope, a really short rope.. People still say they cant believe I held on for so long, I cant explain it to them, dont even try anymore, I am pretty sure I know the answer to that, but it isnt something I can really explain verbally, I just feel the answer, if that makes any sense, like the experience as painful as it was washed away who I was and made me into who I am now..
CONGRATULATIONS Lizzy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 🙂
Hi everyone!