In the wake of Weinergate, CNN posted an article entitled, Stop calling Huma Abedin a victim. Abedin, of course, is Anthony Weiner’s wife, who I’m sure was, at the very least, embarrassed by the scandal, and perhaps angry enough to consider divorce.
The article quotes a couple of authors telling women to choose not to be victims. Instead, women should choose to define their own happiness. Oh, there are a couple of caveats—the advice doesn’t apply to women who fear for their safety or are facing financial ruin. But there is no discussion of what to do when your relationship is so emotinally abusive that you are psychologically traumatized.
In short, this story offers advice for women coping with infidelity whose partners are not sociopaths. Which is fine—these women need advice as much as anyone. But the article also reinforces society’s “just get over it” attitude, which makes life difficult for women dealing with true exploitation.
Read Stop calling Huma Abedin a victim on CNN.com.
skylar
Liz
I have no idea. It’s just a possibility. I’m just saying maybe you need to do this without giving her a heads up so she can’t find excuses not to see you.
do you usually send her an email before you come over?
or do you just knock on her door?
one/joy_step_at_a_time
miss elizabeth bennet – you can’t control how this turns out, and it’s so obvious that you would like to. you can’t.
just tell her or don’t tell her – just get it done. don’t write a letter, don’t send an email, just knock on her door, and tell her whatever it is you need to.
the drama is damn near killing me.
one/joy_step_at_a_time
STAR – please see my post
July 18, 2011 at 9:21 pm on this thread xoxxoo
MoonDancer
oh my
ElizabethBennett
Hens-I DID IT-I did it by email-I’m such a coward but at least it’s done. She of course told me that she is straight. She said some other encouraging things about my job and that she doesn’t hate me. I went over after and knocked on her door and told her thank you. She told me that she’s sorry that she isn’t gay and she joked and said that the elephant is on her chest now. I told her I was sorry for that and she said that’s ok I survived Katrina-I’m tough and I can survive anything.
ElizabethBennett
Star-I sure hope that you consider me as one of those people who care about you and that you care about.
Ox Drover
Well, Lizzy, it is done, so that elephant of anxiety ought to be off your chest as well. 🙂
MoonDancer
Lizzy – I am happy you did this….and happier that your not devastated or feeling rejected. This neighbor lady can be a good platonic friend for you..so now focus on your new job and your new life…but please put romance on the back burner for awhile..you need to take care of Lizzy..
ElizabethBennett
Oxy-it is gone and it’s a huge relief for me. It is a bigger relief that she doesn’t hate me. I’ll see how she acts tomorrow. We joked and said at least she won’t be shocked when I eventually bring a girl home. I am definitely sad but not as sad as I thought I would be. I just want our friendship to be the same. I told her that I wasn’t going to try to convert her to the other side and she also said that she knew it was hard for me to say it.
She also gave me a lecture about maintaining a hold on my emotions and not getting distracted at the new job. So typical of her. LOL. She does care-I just hope she is the same tomorrow.
ElizabethBennett
Hens-I’m sad and it will still be hard to say goodbye to her and now that she is lecturing me about maintaining a hold on my emotions, I’m going to have to keep a stiff upper lip when we say goodbye. I have to admit that I’m shedding some tears over it.