Back in the summer of 1996, when I logged onto the America Online Love section, I had no idea that it would be the beginning of a journey that would change my life.
I was single, had never been married and was about to turn 40—yes, I heard that biological clock ticking very loudly. I ran my own copywriting business and finally, after 13 years of struggle, I was making good money. Maybe, I hoped, it was finally time for me.
When I logged on to AOL and looked at the personal ads, all I wanted was a date.
Enter the sociopath
What I found was James Montgomery, who turned out to be a con artist—a sociopath.
Like many Lovefraud readers, when this man crossed my path, I had no idea what a sociopath was. I did not know that human predators lived among us. I stayed away from gang members and drug dealers. Heck, I even stayed away from smokers. I assumed that I was safe.
I was wrong.
James Montgomery swept in and proclaimed his love. “You’re the woman I’ve been waiting for all my life,” he gushed.
I’d been single all of my adult life, and I’d never seen anything like it. Most men avoid the “L” word even more than the “R” word. If James Montgomery was telling me that he loved me, he must have meant it.
I was wrong.
Looking for answers
Now, before Montgomery showed up, I was somewhat engaged in trying to find answers to the question of life. I strolled the self-help aisles of bookstores. I listened to positive-thinking tapes. I even went to a few motivational seminars.
Was I devoted to the pursuit of self-awareness and enlightenment? No. Mostly I was trying to figure out how to find romance.
But along the way, I became familiar with metaphysical concepts, such as everything in the universe is connected, and we attract what happens to us.
Why did I attract this?
So when James Montgomery crashed through my life with a battering ram, I wanted answers. What had I done to attract this?
Believe me, as I was going through the trauma, I was not serene and sanguine. I was angry. I was terrified. I was not interested in a spiritual lesson. But there was a spiritual lesson, and it made all the difference in the world. I explain what I learned, and how it helped me, in my book.
Me? Am I some kind of guru? Should I stock up on flowing robes? No. I’m an ordinary person who found herself on an extraordinary journey.
And all I wanted was a date.