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By | February 14, 2013 34 Comments

Another custody battle, another murder

Christine Belford was shot dead in a Delaware courthouse by her former father-in-law, Thomas Matusiewicz. David Matusiewicz, Belford’s ex-husband and father of their three children, had previously had his parental rights terminated after kidnapping the children and taking them to Nicaragua.

Documents hint at wider conspiracy in Delaware courthouse shooting, on Philly.com.


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Ox Drover

I’ve read about this case in another newspaper and it all boils down to the fact that people just don’t “get it” about psychopaths, and obviously Ms Belford’s X husband and his parents all qualified.

Just like I knew and accepted that my Psychopathic son Patrick was a thief, it NEVER IN A MILLION YEARS dawned on me he would be a KILLER…boy, was I everr wrong in underestimating what he iis capable of.

Ms. Belford knew her husband and his mother and father were kidnappers, but it never dawned on her that they would go so far as to kill her and one of themselves. She underestimated the lengths that some psychopaths will go to “win”

J. Reid Meloy, PhD, one of the “experts” (I use that in quotes for several reasons I won’t go into here) published a book on how to assess for risk. The book is aimed at mental health and police professionals. The problem is though, even if WE get it how dangerous someone is, the system doesn’t always agree with us.

An order for a psychopath to stay 1,000 feet away from someone is a worthless piece of paper when they are willing to die in order to kill the victim. (Yes, I know the grandmother was the one with the order, but I’m just making a point about how worthless court orders are with people like this) These people had already shown that they were willing to break the law and go to great trouble to do so.

It is always difficult to predict the behavior of people, but the BEST guess is that past behavior predicts future behavior, and this woman lost her life because she thought she could go to court and get child support from someone who was willing to flaunt the law to the extent he had in the past. Just like I never thought that Patrick could kill until it happened, it just wasn’t me that time. God bless those orphan children and rest their mother’s soul.

Truthspeak

I also saw this on the news……and, I cannot describe how horrified I was when I saw it.

So, the father of the children in question will never, EVER have access to those human beings, again. The grandmother has been ordered to stay away from them. The grandfather shot and killed the mother and her friend, and THEN shot himself.

Okay…….now, where does this leave the innocent children?

OxD, you are 100% spot-the-HELL-on: no money is worth risking one’s life, or the lives of innocent children when it is crystal clear that the defendant’s own actions have flown in the face of the Law.

This is a vital lesson to learn, I believe. Sometimes, it’s just better to walk (or, RUN) away and let the matter of money drop by the wayside.

Those poor, poor kids – I cannot imagine what they will have to process in the wake of this horrifically disordered cesspool.

dancingnancies

Hi everyone 🙂 just wanted to share this scene from lord of the rings with everyone. I think it serves as a great metaphor for our own dealings with sociopaths ( wherever they may rear their ugly demonic heads )

http://youtube.com/watch?v=V4UfAL9f74I

Peace 🙂

Ox Drover

Nancies, sorry I can’t view the video (limited gigs of internet connection)

Truthy, it isn’t ONLY about money it is about trying to get the P to obey the rules, the laws. After Patrick got out of prison the first time, he was on parole, and not only the parole but federal law prohibits any felon or former felon from having, possessing or using a fire arm. It is also against the law for anyone else to buy one and give or sell it to someone they KNOW is a felon…so what did Patrick do? Of course he stole or bought A GUN! According to my step son’s widow, he openly bragged about the gun and the police report has witnesses saying he continually “played with it, jacking rounds in and out of the chamber.”

Of course I had no idea he was doing all these things but I SHOULD HAVE FIGURED he would no obey the parole conditions or that he would actually be DANGEROUS to someone’s life.

The one time he came home to visit me after he got out of prison the first time, he told me “The reason I didn’t come back home after got out of prison is I knew if I got in to trouble you would turn me in to the cops” and I said “well,, you got that right”

He knew my husband’s niece where he was living would NOT turn him in. Of course she got a SWAT team descend on her house for her trouble. He had never observed or done what any other probation or parole had required.

Yet when he killed Jessica I should NOT have been surprised, yet I was, just like this woman didn’t believe her husband or his family would resort to murder because she could not conceive of such a thing because SHE would have obeyed the law, she thought that now that her x husband and her MIL had gone to prison, they wouldn’t do anything that would send them back.

So she pushed for child support because it is RIGHT that a man should pay support for his children, even if he is not allowed to see them, she pushed in the courts for what was RIGHT. But her X and his parents had already shown that they cared not a fig for what was RIGHT by kidnapping the kids like they had. They upped the ante in the only possible way they could, by killing the mother of the girls.

It just breaks my heart that this woman died because she could not predict what that trio of psychopaths would do. She tried to do what was right in a legal way, and paid for her trying to do right with her life.

I almost did the same thing when the Trojan Horse was here and I went to court and the judge did throw him out of my egg donor’s house….and she agreed to keep him out….but then let him back in, and that woke me up and I realized I had to RUN and hide. I didn’t want to run, to leave my home, leave my animals (except my dogs) but I realized finally that my life was in danger. This woman didn’t realize her life was in danger. She tried to do what was RIGHT and it cost her her life.

WE MUST NEVER UNDER ESTIMATE THE PSYCHOPATHS

IMTMR74

My mother, brother and his nurse were all murdered by a hit man hired by my psychopath father in 1993. This case sounds very similar to my family’s story because never in a million years did my mother think my dad would go to the lengths he did, even though she suspected he could hurt her or my brother for money. He even kidnapped me years before when I was 11, and hid me at a family friend’s house because my parents fought over child support. My mom took him to court to get me back. Only after they were dead did all the pieces fall into place and I knew it was him immediately. He had been planning it for a year. I even testified at their trials. He’s been in jail LWOP for 19 years and I’m still constantly reading and learning about psychopaths.

It’s very true that they believe they must WIN at all costs. How dare my mother take him to court and ask for child support? How dare she hold him accountable for supporting his 3 children? How dare she think she was as smart as him?

My heart breaks for those daughters because now they are orphans. My mother’s murder destroyed my family and orphaned my sister and I. My dad’s mother was also accused of being complicit in their murders. She hated my mom for not allowing her control over our lives and I do believe she plotted with her son to have her murdered. I’m still not sure whether she knew he was going to have his own son killed, but possibly. She died right after his trial of brain cancer. I just started communicating with my dad’s family again last year. The trauma my sister and I have suffered is immeasurable.

Truthspeak

Imtmr74, holy moley – I’m sorry to read of your horrific experiences and welcome to LoveFraud. I’m so sorry for the loss of your family members – I cannot imagine that kind of loss, seriously.

Yes, they are arrogant and ruthless, taking no prisoners. I’m glad that he’s in prison for his heinous crimes.

Brightest blessings

IMTMR74

THANK YOU. I’ve actually been on LF for a few years but mostly lurking. I cannot even begin to express how coming to this community has helped me get through some really hard times. I feel like I practically know all of the regular posters in real life because I get on here so much! The support you all give to each other is heartwarming and actually has brought tears to my eyes, especially in Cappucino Queen’s case. As a survivor, I rarely feel like anyone understands the horrific trauma we’ve endured. But I get on this blog and feel like I’m among people who GET IT.

Truthspeak

Imtmr74, I’m so glad that you’ve been lurking and VERY grateful that you’re reaching out and posting. I learn something from EACH reader that posts, and I appreciate your candor with regard to your horrific experiences.

Yeah….trying to talk about experiences to friends and family usually results in disappointment. They really do NOT “get it,” and some of them actually don’t WANT to!

Brightest blessings

Ox Drover

IMTR74, I can only imagine the horror you have survived. As I have been protesting murdering son’s parole I have come into contact with Parents of Murdered Children organization which now is not just for parents, but for any survivor of murder and it breaks my heart to know the stories.

In your case, your own family member was the murderer, and my son tried to have me killed…how dare I disinherit him!

Even after I knew he was capable of murder, I never dreamed he would try to murder ME!!!

It is so impossible for us to FATHOM the lengths they will go to WIN. Because we wouldn’t imagine it, we can’t imagine that they could.

IMTMR74

Hi Ox Drover, thank you for your support. I’ve followed your story, as well. I’m so sorry that you have to fight against your own son getting paroled because you know he will come after you if he gets released. My father is old and sick now but I still am very wary of him knowing too much about me, even though I know he will die in jail. We just never know what they will do. I feel your pain. That’s why I have to put so much faith and trust in Jesus to protect me. Otherwise, I wouldn’t make it through each day without being afraid. But I am very cautious and vet people in my life carefully. I rarely ever have people visit my home or know where I live. That’s the PTSD.

I actually do want to get involved in PMC. I think there is a local chapter in the area I live in. I will look into it. Thanks for reminding me!

Blessings to you and your hard work to educate us on this site. You are an inspiration to so many people.

Ox Drover

Dear IMTMR74,

Thank you. I don’t “feel like” an inspiration to anyone, especially myself…sometimes my faith wavers and I loose sight of my God. Thank you for reminding me of that…I think of the man with the demon possessed son that he asked Jesus to heal. Jesus asked the man “do you believe” and the man said “Yes, Lord, I believe….help me with my UNbelief.” So many times I must pray “help me with my unbelief.”

Even when I think I am “strong” something comes up and blows me out of the water…so I keep on reminding myself and others that our healing is a JOURNEY and not a destination.

When I “started” on the healing journey it was all about learning about THEM, now I feel like I know as much as I NEED to know about them, but am only scratching the surface of learning about ME. Learning how to be the kind of person I wish my son was.

It breaks my heart that he has given his soul to Satan and his body to the law.

I am so glad that your P sperm donor at least got LWOP…there was one time I would have “died” if that had been the case, but now I almost wish he was on death row, but I’m not sure I’ll be safe as long as he is breathing.

I read where in November some LWOP rapist in New Mexico had two buddies that got out on parole and he told them he would give them millions of dollars if they would go to NY and kill the witnesses in his triial, and THEN go kidnap and torture to death Justin Bieber and his body guards. These guys actually got to NY but somehow got on the wrong freeway and tried to cross into Canada and there was a warrant out for one of them. When the cops got them to cop out to the “plan” they got them on the phone to the guy in NM and got it recorded. Sounds like “Keystone Cops” but it is about what happened to me…my son sent some guy after us. Fortunately I found out, and fortunately these idiots got on the wrong freeway, but you know, iit sounds “crazy” and “no one would really do that” but IT DOES HAPPEN.

Just like this woman in the article did not BELIEVE he would kill her, and your mother didn’t believe he would KILL HER…but you know, I BELIEVE, I NOW BELIEVE…but like DAvid in the wilderness hiding from King Saul there have been many lessons I have learned in this “College of hard knocks” and I figure there are a few more so I will keep on trying to learn.

God bless you IMTMR74, you’ve had a difficult “row to hoe” as we say here in the boondocks.

Radar_On

Dear IMTMR74, just wow…:( crap, i thot i came from an F’up family. What a hellacious nightmare to have survived, but survive you did! And YES, People just don’t “get it”. The Normal mind has a hard time comprehending insanity.. in my situation, after having gone so long putting a puzzle pieces together, when I got all the pieces to fit and got the big picture, I absolutely felt like I was having a nervous breakdown! Best wishes!!!!!!

strongawoman

IMTMR74

My heart goes out to you. What a horrific thing to happen. I wanted to extend the hand of friendship also. Such strength to survive such loss.

IMTMR74

Radar_On and strongawoman, thank you for your heartfelt comments. I admit I myself still have hard time wrapping my head around what happened to my family. I definitely didn’t begin my true healing journey until a few years ago. One of the worst parts of this trauma is, after being orphaned, my sister and I were supposedly “supported” by my mom’s sisters and brothers. She had a huge immediate family. Well, they traumatized us even further because most of them have personality disorders and rage issues. Yeah, I, as the oldest daughter became the target and scapegoat for all the issues they ever had with my mother. It is a long, convoluted story that I will share on Lovefraud one day. But I swear I’ve been around disordered people from the moment I was born!

And, yes, strongawoman, it does feel like you’re having a nervous breakdown when you realize your own family (and family friends) are so disturbed. I’ve been NC with those aunts and uncles for more than 2 years and I have so much more peace in my life. I can focus on this journey Ox Drover mentioned in her post.

Ox, I LOVE that bible story about the future King David running from Saul because that is EXACTLY how I felt for years!!! I had to run and hide who I really was from evil, jealous and manipulative family members who I thought loved me and wanted to see me succeed when they really wanted to destroy my life and my spirit. I meditated on those verses in 1 Samuel, especially 1 Samuel 24 because I will not choose revenge over those who tried to destroy me. I’ve wanted to! I’ve wanted to write books, go on talk shows, etc. to tell the world the TRUE story of my “matyred” aunts who really hated their murdered sister and her daughters but I leave it all to God to pass judgment in the end. (Oprah wanted to interview me years ago but I refused. I appeared on Maury back in ’96 when it was a real talk show and it was a terrible experience. The producers brought on a “hit man” to interview AFTER I asked them not to because of my PTSD. I don’t trust those shows.)

1 Samuel 24:15
“May the Lord be the One to judge between you and me. May He see and help me, and save me from you.”

Truthspeak

Imtmnr74, I believe that everyone, regardless of their systems of beliefs, feels the urge for revenge. I appreciate your sharing Sam’s verse.

I also agree that you were betrayed by the producers and I am very hesitant to participate in “talk shows” because I don’t want MY experiences to be convoluted into ENTERTAINMENT. There is nothing entertaining about my experiences, and absolutely nothing entertaining about the circumstances that left you orphaned.

Congratulations on your NC – it’s not an easy task, especially when those people were the ones that were “supposed” to care and clearly didn’t.

Thank you for your candor and sharing in your recovery.

Brightest blessings

IMTMR74

No, TS, it’s not easy at all to be NC because I was left with nothing but $$$ and I really needed their support, But the $$$ is all they cared about. I am still shocked how many people are willed to destroy anything and everything around them because of ENVY and love of money. And isn’t the real reason they want your money so they can get you to envy them like they envy YOU? But that’s the thing- I don’t allow myself to envy others because it’s a losing battle. I feel grateful and blessed with what God’s given to ME.

Money is essentially what destroyed my whole entire family, maternal and paternal. That’s why I have such a bad relationship with $ now. I sometimes hate it but we need it to survive. My sister hordes over her $ because she’s been conditioned to believe everyone but my Malignant N aunt who helped raise her wants her money (And guess who I suspect really wants it?).

Thanks for allowing me to share layer upon layer. I know I’m being extremely triggered because in a few weeks it will be the 20th anniversary of my mom and brother’s murders, along with his dedicated nurse. I heard they are making another movie about our story, too. This time it will be in theatres and starring Nicholas Cage. I’m still not sure what to do or feel about that.

One day at a time…

Ox Drover

Dear IMTMR74, unfortunately those shows are “entertainment” not news or therapy…and while I would like to get my story out there I am not willing to subject myself to such carp! I did do a short interview with a documentary film about psychopaths and Aftermath radio but that is all, and here on LF I’ve been open and honest about my name and my story.

I too have felt the urge for revenge, and it is one that embitters the person who holds on to it, someone once said “it is like drinking poison and expecting someone else to die.” It eats at you like a cancer.

I realized that the “7 deadly sins” are sins BECAUSE they hurt us not so much others. We are told not to ENVY —why? because envy hurts us. We are told not to seek revenge? Why? Because the desire for revenge hurts US. Envy and the desire for revenge may be “natural” feelings, but they are NOT beneficial feelings for sure.

Money itself is not bad or good, though we need a minimal amount to live, but the DESIRE for money is the root of all evil…back again to ENVY.

IMTMR74, avoiding toxic people, NC if you can iis the only way we can not be triggered continually. Having to re-do the parole protest again was like CONTACT for me. I’m not much into “anniversaries” being triggers, even the anniversary of my husband’s death doesn’t trigger me any more, but even “back door” contact sure does.

Louise

IMTMR74:

My heart really goes out to you. I am not sure how I would cope if I went through all you went through. I didn’t realize your story had been on TV. Wow. Please take care of yourself. HUGS.

Tea Light

Imtmr, as no doubt will be true for everyone in the LF community who has read your posts, I am greatly saddened to read of your traumatic losses and the grievous harm that has been done to you and your sister. God bless your courage and resolution to stay safe and to heal. As I read with some anger of your treatment by the talk show producers I thought of a chapter of a book I recently read, The Psychopath Test, in which author Jon Ronson interviews a woman who worked in production vetting and sourcing troubled people to appear on the human interest talk show in question. She selected by asking the potential guests if they were on medication. People on prozac were considered perfect; depressed angry and upset and easy to manipulate to tears or outbursts on air. Anti-psychotics were a no-no as the producers didn’t want suicides following appearances although some guests ‘backfired’ and did attempt suicide following their broadcast exploitation. Psychotic guests
were too unpredictable to risk exploiting, depressed anxious guests were targetted as ideal for exploitation. Many disordered unethical people working on these shows no doubt. Peace and love to you in your recovery x

margo12

I was married to a sociopath and had a son with him. I was lucky to divorce him, but he is making my son into a sociopath now. We have a 50/50 settlement and my son is with me on weekends and through the summer. He is 13 now and is verbally abusive, calls me and my now-husband terrible vulgarities. He is becoming obscene with our 5 year old son and is becoming physically abusive. Meanwhile, his father calls the child protective services on us regularly and manipulates our 13 year old to lie and push us any way he can. I am afraid for my 5 year old son now and becoming afraid that all these lies will hurt me and my husband as these constant accusations of child abuse are coming forth. I am considering giving up my custody for the sake of my young son and husband. I can not fix my teenager.

Ox Drover

Margo, I am so sorry you are in this situation. Unfortunately, DNA does have a great deal to do with sociopathy and s does environment and seems like your son got a double whammy.

I too have a psychopathic son, who is in prison for murder and by age 15 (puberty) he was already starting too be dangerous, by 20 he was iin prison for murder.

I don’t think you are bad or crazy for considering giving up custody of your 13 yr old to protect your younger son, your husband and yourself. It sounds to me like you have considered this with a reasonable head.

You’ve found a wonderful resource here at LoveFraud, there are quite a few of us here who have psychopathic offspring that we have had to distance ourselves from, you ARE NOT ALONE.

Again, welcome to Love Fraud. God bless.

Truthspeak

Margo12, I am sorry to read of your experiences and you found a great place of knowledge, learning, and recovery.

My eldest son was diagnosed Borderline Personality Disorder Cluster B and is a sociopath. OxD is spot-on that genetics can play a role in how someone pans out. You DO sound as if you’ve given serious and pragmatic thought to your safety, your 5-year-old’s safety, and that of your husband. It is not an “easy” choice to distance ouselves from a disordered child, but it can be done without anger.

Welcome to LoveFraud, and I encourage you to keep reading, keep posting, and base your decisions upon what will be best for you, your family, and your eldest son.

Brightest blessings

Distressed Grandmother

Pray for my Grandchildren love fraud friends. This just terrified me reading this so glad you survived this horrible ordeal Imtmr74, I am glad you are starting to deal with all of this. No contact is the best for sure.
Margo12,
I think it is for the best too for all of you to let your husband have custody. As hard as it will be on you it will probably be a lot safer.

Ox Drover

Dear Grandmother,

I do pray for your grandchildren, and for YOU as well. I know the pain must be intense. God bless you and comfort you and keep the children safe. (((hugs)))

Ox Drover

Well, here is another child given to an ex convict father who murdered him, in spite of the mother telling the court the father was a violent man.

Judge ordered father to keep custody of his sons just 4 months before ‘he killed his 9-year-old with a hatchet’

By Daily Mail Reporter

PUBLISHED: 16:24 EST, 1 March 2013 | UPDATED: 16:26 EST, 1 March 2013

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A judge ruled a father should keep custody of his two sons just four months before the man killed one of the boys with a hatchet as he slept on the couch, it has emerged.

Phillip Raymond Hernandez, 36, was arrested on Tuesday night after allegedly murdering his nine-year-old son, Matthew Hernandez, as the boy’s great-grandmother looked on helplessly.

The horrific killing at the family’s home in South Natomas, California came just four months after a judge ruled the boys should stay in his custody as their mother battled to have them back.

Hernandez was granted custody of the Matthew and his now-12-year-old brother in 2009 despite a startling history of violence and arrests and their mother claiming he was a dangerous man.

Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2286761/Phillip-Hernandez-Judge-ordered-father-custody-sons-just-4-months-killed-9-year-old-hatchet.html#ixzz2ML3AOhwK
Follow us: @MailOnline on Twitter | DailyMail on Facebook

Ox Drover

Here’s another one…do you believe this BS?

Mother-in-law reveals her son ‘accidentally’ killed his estranged wife with a zip-tie during confrontation over child custody before they hid her body in a septic tank

By Daily Mail Reporter

PUBLISHED: 13:56 EST, 1 March 2013 | UPDATED: 14:33 EST, 1 March 2013

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Confession: Sandra Inman told police is was her idea to lure her daughter-in-law into a car

Plot: Sandra Inman said it was her idea to lure her daughter-in-law into a car where she was killed

A newly unsealed confession reveals a woman told authorities she helped hide the body of her son’s estranged wife in a septic tank after he accidentally strangled her to death with zip-ties.

Sandra Inman, 47, who was sentenced to at least 15 years in prison for her part in the killing of 25-year-old Summer Inman in Logan, Ohio, made the confession to an investigator in 2011.

She claimed that she wanted to see her three grandchildren more so she and her husband and son forced her daughter-in-law into a car to discuss the issue.

Radar_On

Words fail me on this one! Just ughhhhhhhhh., smh. 🙁

Ox Drover

When Liane Leedom put up the article about Dr. Amy Castillo’s warning the judge her x would kill the kids, and he DID kill the children on the first unsupervised visit just to SPITE his x wife, I thought “oh, that must be so RARE” but it isn’t really “rate” it is inn fact fairly common if you watch the news for such events. Breaks my heart too. We must have CHILDREN’s RIGHTS not parents “rights”

Louise

And how about the grandmother who killed her two little grandsons yesterday and then committed suicide?

Ox Drover

I think I read where she had “mental health issues” so she may not have been totally responsible, but doesn’t bring the kids back.

These others seem to be totally psychopaths. (head shaking here) and it is so very sad.

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