Lovefraud.com recently heard from a woman in Illinois, who we'll call Mary. Mary is trying to protect herself and her eight-year-old daughter from her ex-boyfriend, the daughter's father, who has guns and has threatened to use them. Not only is Mary fighting the ex, but she's fighting lawyers—both hers and his—and an unresponsive family court. Mary left the ex for good in 2001, when their daughter was three. The guy has an alcohol problem and a 20-year arrest record. He has five arrests for DUI (driving under the influence of alcohol) and 14 DWLR arrests (driving while license revoked). He has two arrests for domestic battery. Two different women have sought protection orders against him, …
Sociopathy–People Magazine doesn’t get it
Last year People Magazine put out a special publication called True Crime Stories—Cases that shocked America. It is a 144-page collection of headline-grabbing murders, rapes and thefts. It also suggests that when it comes to sociopaths, People Magazine just doesn't get it. The book includes 96 cases, plus celebrity mug shots. The word "sociopaths" was used once, in the introduction to the chapter called Murder for Murder's Sake. Here is what it says: "There's one group most of us don't understand: those whose motive for killing is killing itself. They don't hate their victims; often they don't even know their victims. When caught, they rarely plead, whine or cry. Frequently they're c …
Tolerance is not for sociopaths
Not long ago my husband and I saw Rob Becker's Defending the Caveman, a one-man comedy about men, women, and how we're different. It gives funny-but-true explanations of why men watch television so intently, why women shop so intently, why women talk more than men and many other characteristics of the sexes that often lead to conflict. The show starts from the premise that women tend to believe all men are jerks (the actual terminology is a bit more colorful). The actor, our modern-day caveman, uses humor and compassion to defend his sex. The message he wants to convey is that men aren't jerks, and neither are women. We're just different, and we should learn to understand and appreciate …
Call Ed Hicks a bigamist, but not a sociopath
Ed Hicks pleaded guilty to bigamy in a Chesapeake, Virginia courtroom on March 2. He will sit in jail until his sentencing on May 8. Ed Hicks was married seven times, and court records indicate that four of the unions were bigamous. As you might expect, the story is complicated—for details read the Ed Hicks case history on Lovefraud.com. Here's the quick version: Sandra Hicks, the seventh wife, filed bigamy charges against Ed Hicks last year. Worried that her "husband" would get away with a slap on the hand—bigamy is rarely prosecuted—Sandra went to the media. The Washington Post published a story about Hicks and his marrying ways on July 1, 2005, the date of his initial hearing on the …
Sociopaths troll for victims with online ads
Millions of people use online dating sites to search for the person of their dreams. And millions of people have learned the great lesson of online dating: It's easy to lie on the Internet. So now, not only are there dating sites, but there are sites to expose the lying daters. The New York Times featured some of these sites in an article on February 16, 2006, headlined (Name Here) Is a Liar and a Cheat. (Registration required to read the story.) The article featured sites like DontDateHimGirl.com and Manhaters.com, which, as the Times wrote, "are dedicated to outing bad apples or just identifying people who may not be rotten but whose dating profiles are rife with fiction." Another …
Oprah and the con man
This past Monday, February 13, The Oprah Winfrey Show aired a story called Casanova Conman. It profiled Eric Cooper of the Houston, Texas area, who allegedly married or became engaged to nine women in 10 years. Five of the women appeared on the show. Between 1994 and 2004, Cooper married Melissa, Kimberly, April, Paula, another April, Jennifer and Krystal. All the marriages happened quickly, and at least two were allegedly bigamous. He also became engaged to Brandy and Tonya. He has three daughters, and a child on the way, all with different women. So how did Cooper convince so many women to say "yes"? He told them he was in the Navy, or a Navy pilot, or a Navy SEAL, and showed up for …
He or she is a sociopath–now what?
Before you figure out that you're involved with a sociopath, your dominant state of mind in the relationship is confusion. There are times when he (or she) is the most charming person on Earth. But he has been lying to you for so long that you don't know what is true and what is false. One day he says the two of you are soul mates, the next day he beats you. You're walking around on eggshells, never sure when a minor issue will send him into a rage. Nothing makes any sense—until you realize that you're dealing with a sociopath. Then suddenly, like a bright light coming on in a dark room, it all makes sense. But now, if you're still involved with the predator, you have to decide what …
Psycho movies add to the confusion
In the 2004 movie Taking Lives, Angelina Jolie stars as an FBI profiler sent to Quebec, Canada to help solve a grisly murder. Shortly after she arrives there's another murder—and a suspect. Jolie interviews the suspect. Afterwards, she says to the Canadian investigators, "Psychopaths actually have very different brain patterns. You say words like tree, sofa, house, rape, incest, murder. A normal person's brain pattern changes; the frontal lobe reacts. Psychopaths have no reaction. They feel the same about rape and murder as they do about eating dinner. They have no emotional reaction." Jolie's character is right. Everything she says has been validated by scientific research. As the m …
How many sociopaths are in your town?
Sociopaths are the most destructive personalities of the human race. Don't you think you should know how many of them are living in your community? If you're in the U.S., Lovefraud.com can give you a rough idea. Just click on the "Risk Calculator" link—it's located in the navigation bar and at the top of most pages. Plug in your zip code and you'll know about how many predators are targeting people in your town. Sociopaths in selected communities New York, NY—80,083 Los Angeles, CA—23,560 Phoenix, AZ—12,024 St. Petersburg, FL—3,486 Great Falls, MT—711 Mankota, MN—517 Skippack, PA—7 Dr. Robert Hare, an international expert on sociopaths (he uses the term "psycho …