Last week Lovefraud published an article by Eleanor Cowan entitled, When sociopaths use righteous indignation to exert control. In it, Eleanor relates how her fiance twisted her comment about a pedophile priest into an opportunity to establish his moral superiority over her. The fiance, of course, was disordered and a pedophile himself, but Eleanor didn't know it at the time. He convinced her that he was a righteous, religious man. A Lovefraud reader commented on the post: This article really is a perfect example of how they manipulate you – what I want to know is HOW is it they are so believable? How come they are such good actors?? I would think the average non sociopathic person would …
Women allegedly betrayed by philandering Air Force colonel petition for official investigation – you can help!
Military officers are held to a higher standard of behavior than the general public. Military law criminalizes "conduct unbecoming of an officer" such as adultery — that is, if the law is enforced. One woman thought she was in a genuine romantic relationship with a lieutenant colonel in the Air National Guard — also a doctor — until three years later when she learned that she was just one of many. She says the lieutenant colonel used "military assignments" as excuses to juggle the women. She says he even rotated the women at Air National Guard events, and none of his fellow officers called him out. Read her story here: Part 1: Nina's Story — A charismatic doctor and lieutenant colone …
Bikers protect kids who must testify against abusers
[youtube_sc url="https://youtu.be/c-5X5LSInEo"] Guardians of the Children is a biker organization that protects victims of child abuse. When a child must testify agains an abuser in court, the bikers escort the child to the courthouse, keep the child surrounded, and sit in the courtroom during the testimony. Their actions make the children feel protected. This organization is based in San Antonio, Texas, and has chapters in 20 states. I would like to see them everywhere. More information: Guardians of the Children …
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Stephen Paddock, the Las Vegas shooter, and his psychopathic father
Here's the big question after the horrible massacre in Las Vegas: Why? Sunday night, Stephen Paddock, from his room on the 32nd floor of the Mandalay Bay Casino, started shooting at the 22,000 people attending a country music concert. From his elevation, and with automatic weapons, it was like shooting fish in a barrel. A total of 59 people were killed and more than 500 wounded. It is the worst mass shooting in recent American history. Stephen Paddock, 64, is the son of Benjamin Hoskins Paddock who robbed two banks between 1959 and 1960. He was sentenced to 20 years in prison in 1961 — but escaped in 1968. Benjamin Paddock, Las Vegas gunman's father, robbed banks and fled FBI, on N …
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What I learned about trauma from my dog
My husband and I adopted a five-year-old rescue dog, Bo, in July of 2016. I wrote about him when we brought him home, which you can read here: My new dog offers a lesson in letting go, on Lovefraud.com. Bo has been living us for over a year now, and he is an absolute joy. When I'm working, Bo usually spends the day snoozing on his cushion on the floor beside me. His internal clock tells him when it's time for his walk, and he gets all excited — he loves going out. Who is he going to meet this time? Bo wants to approach every human, dog and even an occasional cat that happens to be along his route. Bo likes to hang around in the kitchen when Terry and I are making dinner. This, h …
Think of sociopaths as aliens — it may help you understand them
Perhaps the hardest thing to comprehend, and accept, about sociopaths is just how different they are from the rest of us. I've spoken to hundreds of people who have tangled with sociopaths. Even when the mask has not only slipped, but shattered, even when they know the truth about what the sociopath has been doing all along, they still ask, "But how could he do it?" "He kept telling me how much he loved me; how could he cheat like that?" "He said we were soul mates; how can he just up and leave?" "How can he be so cold and calculating?" "How can he look me right in the eye and lie?" (Substitute "she" for "he" as necessary.) Then, the people I talk to start making statements like the …
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Did football star and murderer Aaron Hernandez have a personality disorder or a brain injury?
In 2013, Aaron Hernandez, the former standout tight end for the New England Patriots football team, was charged with murdering his friend. Hernandez had a history of violence and infractions with the law, so his behavior appeared to be that of a typical psychopath. For this reason, Lovefraud covered the story: Aaron Hernandez charged with murder; his cousin charged with contempt, on Lovefraud.com. Hernandez was found guilty of the murder on April 15, 2015 and sentenced to life in prison without the possibility of parole. Two years later, at the age of 27, he hanged himself in prison. An examination of Hernandez' brain found that he suffered from CTE — chronic traumatic encephalopathy. It' …
How being devastated by the sociopath helped me find love
In the course of our two-and-a-half-year relationship, my sociopathic ex-husband, James Montgomery, took $227,000 from me, cheated with at least six women, had a child with one of the women, and then, 10 days after I left him, married the mother of the child. It was the second time he committed bigamy. Once I learned the truth about his behavior, and realized the depth of his deception, I was totally, completely, crushed. But if I hadn't been shattered by the sociopath, I would not have been able to love as I do now. Is your reaction, "huh?" Let me repeat. It was my experience with my sociopathic ex-husband, James Montgomery, that actually enabled me to find the love I always …
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Childhood experiences – including abuse – can alter your DNA
Scientists once thought our genetic blueprint was carved in stone — whatever we inherited from our parents was with us for life. Research over the last few years, however, indicates that this is not the case. Genes can be modified by experience through processes referred to as "epigenetic." This is especially true during childhood. Recent research shows that childhood events, such as the family's socioeconomic status or the absence of a parent, can alter genes responsible for regulating inflammation. Experiences in childhood can alter your DNA for the rest of your life, on ScienceAlert.com. This study dovetails with earlier research showing that child abuse also affects DNA. According to …
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5 steps to recovery from the sociopath (they’re not fast or easy, but the healing is real)
Finally, you realize what is wrong with your romantic partner: He or she is a sociopath. Finally, the behavior that was so confusing makes sense. The person you loved, and who you thought loved you, has a personality disorder. Now you realize that anything your partner told you could have been a lie. Now you know why your partner could be so cruel, then tell you how much he or she loved you, practically in the same breath. Now you realize that there never was any love, that your entire relationship was exploitation, and nothing more. Now what do you do? How do you move forward? How do you recover? Many of your friends and family tell you, "Just put it behind you. Get over it. Move …
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