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Author Archive: Eleanor Cowan

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3 steps to prevent a sociopath from taking advantage of your vulnerabilities
By December 10, 2018 0 Comments Read More →

3 steps to prevent a sociopath from taking advantage of your vulnerabilities

Image by Gustavo Verissimo

“Is it really a vulnerability to respond to somebody (apparently) liking and desiring you? Is that not just a basic human need that we all want to have fulfilled?”

The Lovefraud reader Dorabella asked these questions on a story that I posted a couple of weeks ago, The sociopath as your soul mate. They are great questions. The answers are: Yes, it’s a vulnerability to respond to someone desiring you, and yes, it’s a basic human need. So although these are vulnerabilities, they are also normal human qualities.

To be human is to have vulnerabilities.

This is a preview of 3 steps to prevent a sociopath from taking advantage of your vulnerabilities. Read the full post (801 words, 1 image, estimated 3:12 mins reading time)
Posted in: Donna Andersen, Hooked by a sociopath
MaryAnn Glynn to host free conference call support group 12/16/18 at 5pm EST
By December 7, 2018 0 Comments Read More →

MaryAnn Glynn to host free conference call support group 12/16/18 at 5pm EST

  Experience the support of people who know!  Join our free support group Sunday, December 16, 2018 at 5 pm EST.  Go www.destructiverelationshipshelp.com and use the Contact Form at the bottom of the home page to state your interest in joining.  Do this every time even if you have joined us before!  We will reply to you with instructions to join the conference call.  It is anonymous and no personal information is displayed or shared.

Share your struggles, questions, get feedback and clarity from people who get it!  Hope to meet you there!

Permanent link to this post (91 words, 1 image, estimated 22 secs reading time)
Posted in: Uncategorized
 
My psychopath boyfriend stole all my money, bought a sailboat and tried to have me committed
By December 7, 2018 0 Comments Read More →

My psychopath boyfriend stole all my money, bought a sailboat and tried to have me committed

Spath TalesEditor’s note: Lovefraud received the following story from a reader who posts as “Lillian.”

I met him online. Dated casually for a year, during which time I met his sister who grows fruit & is married to a well-known doctor. I met his other sister who is a judge. I got to know his 21-year-old son who was graduating from college & gave him a job for a summer. I met his ex-wife. I met a childhood friend of his. He showed me portfolios of the homes he built or remodeled, I met a couple of his clients, & he drove me past a few homes.

This is a preview of My psychopath boyfriend stole all my money, bought a sailboat and tried to have me committed. Read the full post (1542 words, 1 image, estimated 6:10 mins reading time)
Posted in: Spath Tales / Letters to Lovefraud
Research participants wanted to complete online survey about experiences in relationships with psychopaths!
By December 6, 2018 0 Comments Read More →

Research participants wanted to complete online survey about experiences in relationships with psychopaths!

Researchers at the University of Windsor are conducting a study investigating experiences of remembering past events in interpersonal relationships with suspected psychopaths.

As a participant, you will be asked about a specific time when someone you suspect to be a psychopath made you question your memory for a past event. This may have been because they told you that your memory was incorrect, that the events did not happen, or that other people have doubts about your experiences. The researchers are hoping to learn more about your experiences of remembering and communicating with suspected psychopaths about things that happened in the past.

This is a preview of Research participants wanted to complete online survey about experiences in relationships with psychopaths!. Read the full post (225 words, 1 image, estimated 54 secs reading time)
Posted in: Events and announcements, Uncategorized
 
“Ordinary men” do not shoot their wives and daughters — sociopaths do
By December 5, 2018 0 Comments Read More →

“Ordinary men” do not shoot their wives and daughters — sociopaths do

Lance Hart of England shot his wife and daughter, and then himself.

Claire Hart, or Spalding, Lincolnshire, England, had just escaped her emotionally abusive and controlling husband. In July 2016, Claire’s grown sons, Luke and Ryan, packed up her and their 19-year-old sister, Charlotte, and moved them into a rented house.

Five days later, the controlling husband, Lance, shot Claire and Charlotte in the parking lot of a local sports center. Then he shot himself.

A Lovefraud reader just sent me a story about the tragedy that The Guardian newspaper published last year. You can read it here:

This is a preview of “Ordinary men” do not shoot their wives and daughters — sociopaths do. Read the full post (684 words, 1 image, estimated 2:44 mins reading time)
Posted in: Donna Andersen, Explaining the sociopath, Media sociopaths
By December 3, 2018 6 Comments Read More →

Find healing from the sociopath in the holiday spirit

Terry Kelly and Donna Andersen in front of the Christmas tree at Rockefeller Plaza, New York City.

For the first time in our 17 years together, my husband, Terry Kelly, and I, visited New York City during the holiday season. It was far more magical than I anticipated.

At the Birdland jazz club, we saw David and the Bombshells, a retro, 1930s-style band with three female singers (the Bombshells). Then, at the Metropolitan Museum of Art, we saw 20-foot Christmas tree surrounded by a gorgeous, 18th-century Nativity Creche. After that, we visited the Christmas tree Rockefeller Plaza — a 72-foot tall Norway spruce decorated with thousands of LED lights.

This is a preview of Find healing from the sociopath in the holiday spirit. Read the full post (591 words, 1 image, estimated 2:22 mins reading time)
Posted in: Donna Andersen, Recovery from a sociopath
5 prison inmates steal $560K from military personnel in love fraud scam
By December 1, 2018 1 Comments Read More →

5 prison inmates steal $560K from military personnel in love fraud scam

Wendell Wilkins, Rakeem Spivey, Jimmy Dunbar Jr., David Dempsey and Antwine Matthews were indicted in a sextortion scam.

Five inmates in a South Carolina prison managed to scam 442 members of the armed forces by using smuggled cell phones to initiate love fraud scams. They posed as underaged girls, contacted the service members, and then blackmailed the victims for $560,000 in hush money.

US Attorney Sherri Lydon held a press conference in front of the prison in Columbia, South Carolina, and announced charges against five men:

  • Antwine Lamar Matthews, 28
  • Rakeem Spivey, 27
  • Jimmy Dunbar Jr., 37
  • Wendell Wilkins, 30
This is a preview of 5 prison inmates steal $560K from military personnel in love fraud scam. Read the full post (187 words, 1 image, estimated 45 secs reading time)
Posted in: Media sociopaths
The sociopath led a double life and stopped paying the bills
By November 29, 2018 3 Comments Read More →

The sociopath led a double life and stopped paying the bills

Spath TalesEditor’s note: The Lovefraud reader who posts as “raisingtwins” sent the following story.

When I met my sociopath, he was good looking, fit, charismatic and career driven. In 2002, I moved across the country with him, since he was transferred back to an office with the company he worked for. We had a baby together in 2003 and he wanted nothing to do with getting married. I should have seen that as a giant red flag. He threw lavish parties for his work team and worked long hours.

This is a preview of The sociopath led a double life and stopped paying the bills. Read the full post (387 words, 1 image, estimated 1:33 mins reading time)
Posted in: Spath Tales / Letters to Lovefraud
How loss through suicide creates perfect targets for sociopaths
By November 28, 2018 1 Comments Read More →

How loss through suicide creates perfect targets for sociopaths

By Eleanor Cowan

The generous invitation to a “Survivors of Suicide Loss Retreat,” a day of comfort for those left behind, could so easily have been ignored by me. After all, it’s been 46 years since my depressed mother climbed over the railing of her high-rise balcony in Toronto.

I’ve done a great deal of recovery work since then. I researched the negative domino effect of Mum’s life: abused by her alcoholic father, unprotected by her co-dependent mother, denied the privilege of marrying the man she loved because he wasn’t Irish, followed by her hasty marriage to an unhappy religious man, who was a widower – and Irish.

This is a preview of How loss through suicide creates perfect targets for sociopaths. Read the full post (834 words, 1 image, estimated 3:20 mins reading time)
Posted in: Eleanor Cowan
Signs of a sociopath: Man allegedly gets out of prison and immediately kills a woman
By November 27, 2018 3 Comments Read More →

Signs of a sociopath: Man allegedly gets out of prison and immediately kills a woman

David Bohart (Tucson Police Department)

David James Bohart, 34, of Arizona, got out of prison on Monday, November 19, 2018. That same day, police in Tucson received a 911 call in which a man reported that he was just released from prison and had killed his girlfriend.

Bohart was arrested in a Tucson motel on suspicion of second-degree murder.

The victim, Marika L. Jones, 49, was found dead in a home. While searching the home, detectives found a Department of Corrections file box belonging to Bohart.

None of this looks good for Bohart.

This story gives multiple hints that Bohart may be a sociopath:

This is a preview of Signs of a sociopath: Man allegedly gets out of prison and immediately kills a woman. Read the full post (265 words, 1 image, estimated 1:04 mins reading time)
Posted in: Donna Andersen, Media sociopaths

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