Lovefraud Reader

Editor's note: The Lovefraud reader who posts as "raisingtwins" sent the following story. When I met my sociopath, he was good looking, fit, charismatic and career driven. In 2002, I moved across the country with him, since he was transferred back to an office with the company he worked for. We had a baby together in 2003 and he wanted nothing to do with getting married. I should have seen that as a giant red flag. He threw lavish parties for his work team and worked long hours. We married in 2005 and his behavior was always very erratic. His weight went up and down and his episodes of anger started getting progressively worse. It was a life of constantly walking on eggshells. In …

The sociopath led a double life and stopped paying the billsRead More

Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following story from a reader whom we'll call Arlene18. I have been married to him for 29+ years and we have three grown sons, who are all still in school. In Sept. 2016, I discovered he was leading a double life filled with prostitutes and stripper girlfriends. He admits to doing this for over 20 years, though it is probably longer than that. He made the boys take out student loans, and said we didn't have enough money to replace my decrepit old car — while spending insane amounts of money on his girlfriends in order to make them like him. Through the discovery, I tried having him in therapy to see if the marriage and family could be salvaged, b …

My husband was leading a double life of prostitutes and strippersRead More

Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following letter from a reader whom we'll call "Catherine18." Other names have been changed. I am writing this after a pretty hard day. I have them a lot these days. I’ve made it a habit to tell people that I'm fine or ok. Before that, before everyone knew what happened, I just smiled, laughed and was a pretend version of myself so that I wouldn’t let on what I was suffering. I learned to protect the person hurting me from my mother's abuse of me. I am 42, and I have never not been abused. Ever. I’m now being honest. I am saying I’m not ok. People don't help you when you finally get honest. I have been betrayed, abandoned, pitied and had people talk be …

I am overwhelmed with PTSD, stress, anxiety, fear, loss, betrayal and trying to save myselfRead More

Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following letter from a reader whom we'll call "Cecilia18." I didn’t marry “my” sociopath. I didn’t live with him. I didn’t have children with him. I’m not even sure you could call what passed for a relationship “dating.” Nevertheless, he messed up my life for several years. I’ll call him John. He was a local radio host, and I was a fan. I enjoyed listening to him banter with his producer/on-air sidekick and with his wife when she called in. Looking back, I don’t know why I liked him so much. He made a lot of jokes at the expense of others, including minorities and seniors. This is not my thing at all! But there was something about him: He was witty …

He never had those feelings for me — it was all a lie, an actRead More

Editor's note: This story was written by the Lovefraud reader, "marinapearl." I almost married a sociopath. He seemed like my perfect match at first: kind, funny, generous, respectful. We had everything in common. We moved much more quickly than I would have thought possible for me, as I am usually very cautious, but this was unlike any relationship I’d ever had. We were “soulmates,” “meant to be.” Before long we were engaged. Everything was going well, except for when we would argue. Every time we had the slightest disagreement, he would have a meltdown. Nothing was ever his fault, and he always managed to make me feel bad for saying anything. I just thought he was really sensitive, bu …

I almost married a sociopath, and to this day I don’t know what his motives wereRead More

Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following letter from a reader whom we'll call "Carol18." I’m a 62-year-old woman who left a sociopath husband three years ago. I went online to meet who I thought was my dream man. He was charming; the second date he said I will treat you like no other man has ever treated you before. That was the only true thing he ever said to me. He was romantic my Prince Charming, bought flowers, cards. Then after I fell in love, he tells me he had cancer, had a job as a cook (profile said chef) and financially secure. His car broke. He was sobbing, babe how will I get to work? Well now my savings is drained $3,200, helping him paid off title loans to help h …

After the sociopath: Courage is fear that said its prayersRead More