How to recognize and recover from everyday sociopaths - narcissists

You are here: Home / Archives for Lovefraud Reader

LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: Life with a sociopath ends in death

//  by //  66 Comments

Editor's note: Following is sad news from the Lovefraud reader "Hoping to Heal." Several years ago, I was introduced to a young vivacious couple. Both were very attractive and successful. They were charming and fun to be around. Both had lots of energy and seemed to be enjoying life to its fullest. They seemed to adore one another. While I'd never met the man before, he did have a reputation of being a real Ladies Man. He had been married before and had many relationships that he left abruptly. But, he had it All ”¦ good looks, charisma and a good job, and women were beating his door down. At the time I met this couple, I assumed he had "grown up" and gotten his act together. They looked …

LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: Life with a sociopath ends in deathRead More

LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: How can I help my sister?

//  by //  25 Comments

Editor's Note: This letter was submitted  by Lovefraud reader we'll call "Elizabella." Other names in this letter have been changed. I've spent hours online searching for specific suggestions that apply to this particular situation, but am still mostly at a loss regarding how to handle it and am desperate for help. I'll try to be as succinct as possible, but there is so much to this story. I left an emotionally abusive marriage after 20 years, so I'm very familiar with how these "relationships" work and I am now convinced that my sister, Lisa, is in such a marriage, although she refuses to admit it; she has only hinted at it in the past. She has been married to him (I'll call him Ralph) …

LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: How can I help my sister?Read More

Why I wrote ‘Life in the Aftermath of a Narcissist’

//  by //  28 Comments

Editor's note: The following essay was written by a Lovefraud reader whom we'll call "PeggySue." My book, Life in the Aftermath of a Narcissist came into being as I worked to create my life again following the utter anguish of being used and manipulated by the husband I cherished and who, I believed, loved me. In the midst of heartache and disbelief, I found myself to be dealing with the memories of gaslighting, my devastated emotions, a financial outlook of sheer decimation, and the loss of just “who I was.” Marrying on the heels of my completion of my book called Romance Stew, I was, at age 55, heady at finding “Mr. Right.” The man and his family filled my heart's empty spaces with hope …

Why I wrote ‘Life in the Aftermath of a Narcissist’Read More

New Jersey Judge John Tomasello refuses restraining order for victim of convicted pedophile and bigamist William Jordan

//  by //  9 Comments

By Joyce M. Short BURLINGTON COUNTY, NJ Although New Jersey revamped their sexual assault laws in 2012, yesterday Family Court Judge John Tomasello proved those changes could be easily undermined by a judge who's a misogynist dinosaur. Mishcelle Lewis, of Florence Township, New Jersey, had petitioned the court for a restraining order against convicted bigamist and child molester, William Allen Jordan. Jordan currently awaits trial on charges of sexual coercion, theft by deception, and impersonating a government official. He is currently housed in a special protective section of the Burlington County jail designated for sexual predators. His case history includes failure to register as a …

New Jersey Judge John Tomasello refuses restraining order for victim of convicted pedophile and bigamist William JordanRead More

LETTERS TO LOVEFRAUD: People will never understand I am married to a sociopath

//  by //  51 Comments

Editor's Note: This Letter to Lovefraud was submitted by reader whom we'll call “Juniper.” I have been married for 22 years and have five children. I realized the first year of our marriage that I had married a "psycho" but thought I could help him with my unconditional love and support. He is completely controlling, manipulative, abusive, selfish, and has never shown empathy or compassion to me or our children. He doesn't have relationships with his kids because he chooses not to bond with them. I stayed with him because I believed there must be some good somewhere in him, after all, he was a born again Christian, knew almost every verse in the Bible from memory and sometimes preached on …

LETTERS TO LOVEFRAUD: People will never understand I am married to a sociopathRead More

LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: Fluffing the pillow wrong

//  by //  8 Comments

Editor's Note: This Letter to Lovefraud was submitted by the reader who calls herself "Allergic to Spandex." Other names have been changed as well. By the time my sociopath husband "The Dope" (now, thankfully, my ex) developed testicular cancer, I knew that he was not a "consultant," but a marijuana dealer who didn't even make much money at it. He explained this as noble guerrilla warfare in the fight to legalize marijuana, a cause I still agree with despite him. He claimed that the people he sold pounds of pot to made sure that it got into the hands of medical patients. This was probably a lie too, but it's how he brainwashed me when I was 18. There's cheatin' goin' on I knew that …

LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: Fluffing the pillow wrongRead More

LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: My sociopath partner gave me HIV

//  by //  29 Comments

Editor's Note: This Letter to Lovefraud was submitted by a reader who calls himself "Fred." I bloomed late.  At age 53 I grew tired of a lonely and celibate life, I finally admitted to myself and others I was gay. It didn't take long to find my first boyfriend who was a super sweet, moral guy, like myself,  but after nine months it was apparent we weren't a match. Drawn to downtown guy Many months passed and I again was so lonely. I saw this guy at a downtown club. I'm not sure what the draw was. He was bald, slightly chunky but seemed to be the most beautiful guy I've ever seen. Funny now, because others tell me he's not attractive. I'll call him Adam. I tried to work up the courage …

LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: My sociopath partner gave me HIVRead More

LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: The only hope I have is that Karma exists

//  by //  31 Comments

Editor's Note: This Letter to Lovefraud was submitted by Lovefaud reader whom we'll call “Bessy.” A "relationship" that spanned one year will take me a lifetime, no doubt, to even try to comprehend. From my readings, which have been countless, I know there will never be "closure." This person I didn't even "invite" into my life, effortlessly wormed his way in very quickly and drove me to lose 80 pounds and become suicidal. In the blink of an eye. I would not even normally associate with this type of person he would never be in my circle of friends. Right off the bat, I had glaring red flags and ignored or explained every single one of them away Be more adventurous, I told myself. Give t …

LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: The only hope I have is that Karma existsRead More

LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: Reader needs advice to protect her kids

//  by //  31 Comments

Editor's Note: The Lovefraud reader who goes by the name of “NomorePTSD” has a request. Can  any Lovefraud readers  offer her any advice or suggestions?  This is “NomorePTSD.” My blog post, LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: Escaping my mother, the sociopath, appeared on Lovefraud in June of 2013. I talked about my healing from flashbacks that were a result of my childhood and beginning adulthood relationship with my mother, a sociopath who stalked me for 18 years, motivated largely by envy. We are doing total No Contact, and have essentially erased ourselves from the map of her world. Now I have a bit of a dilemma with privacy. My husband and I moved to a new place, bought our home in a LLC and our ca …

LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: Reader needs advice to protect her kidsRead More

Why I wrote ‘The Devil’s Opus’

//  by //  8 Comments

By Margaux Mannion Brown  Editor's note: Margaux Mannion Brown is the pen name for a Lovefraud reader. Ideas for The Devil's Opus began to emerge when I became fascinated with sociopathic personalities. This occurred when I discovered that one of my close friends had married one. Everyone liked Joe. He was charming, flattering, and helpful. So helpful, that through his career as an investment broker, he was able to scam hundreds of thousands of dollars out of his clients, friends and family. Most of the money was lost on gambling. The rest of it went on big houses, fancy cars, and expensive vacations he pretended to afford. Things fell apart for Joe when people began to demand their i …

Why I wrote ‘The Devil’s Opus’Read More