O.N.Ward

Every week, a chapter of my book, "Husband, Liar, Sociopath: How He Lied, Why I Fell For It & The Painful Lessons Learned" (available via Amazon.com, just click on the title or book cover) will be published here on Lovefraud. To read prior chapters, please see the links at the bottom of the post. Chapter 35A: The Weeds Always Win When Paul and Anne-Marie found themselves with some available time, they hung out a shingle for their own consulting company—A-M-P Consulting Solutions. About this time we discovered that, although Daniel was an exceptionally bright child, he had some severe learning challenges and developmental delays that would mean years of work with specialists, daily t …

“You’re Too Sensitive”–Just One Way Sociopaths Shirk ResponsibilityRead More

Every week, a chapter of my book, "Husband, Liar, Sociopath: How He Lied, Why I Fell For It & The Painful Lessons Learned" (available via Amazon.com, just click on the title or book cover) will be published here on Lovefraud. To read prior chapters, please see the links at the bottom of the post.   Chapter 34: The Illusion of Hope As a sociopath, Paul's black, vacant soul is not capable of change, but as a good actor, he transformed his behavior quickly and profoundly. He just had to dust off a character he had already perfected—that of a doting companion. If he wanted me to continue as his stagehand, and if he wanted to avoid a divorce that was not on his terms and his tim …

Sociopaths Are Often Calm Under Pressure And Lie SeamlesslyRead More

  Every week, a chapter of my book, "Husband, Liar, Sociopath: How He Lied, Why I Fell For It & The Painful Lessons Learned" (available via Amazon.com, just click on the title or book cover) will be published here on Lovefraud. To read prior chapters, please see the links at the bottom of the post. Chapter 33: The Question Is Not What You Look At But What You See (Henry David Thoreau) For months, I had to fight the impulse to recoil whenever Paul touched me. Yet, if we did not have frequent sex, Paul's impatience with me grew even worse. Instead of sharing intimate moments with my husband, I felt like I was feeding a beast. If I did not feed the monster, it would devour me. …

How Sociopaths Turn Our Empathy Against UsRead More

Every week, a chapter of my book, "Husband, Liar, Sociopath: How He Lied, Why I Fell For It & The Painful Lessons Learned" (available via Amazon.com, just click on the title or book cover) will be published here on Lovefraud. To read prior chapters, please see the links at the bottom of the post. Chapter 32: So Close And Yet So Far Having validation that my perception of Paul was as real as any perception could be and not distorted by my bias and any personal baggage was inordinately helpful. Paul had always played the “I have no idea what you are talking about” or the “You must be jealous” cards with me when I broached the subject of his and Anne-Marie's behavior. I was always too …

Why our brains don’t see the truth about sociopathsRead More

  Every week, a chapter of my book, "Husband, Liar, Sociopath: How He Lied, Why I Fell For It & The Painful Lessons Learned" (available via Amazon.com, just click on the title or book cover) will be published here on Lovefraud. To read prior chapters, please see the links at the bottom of the post. Chapter 30: Down The Rabbit Hole Paul had agreed to therapy under the condition that I would not tell anyone we were going. With the expectation of keeping my word, I promised. Normally, I honor my commitments, and secrets are safe with me. But I broke my promise to Paul after two months. I did it, because I felt like I was going crazy. I needed a reality check from an outside s …

A Relationship With A Sociopath Makes You Question What’s “Normal”Read More

Every week, a chapter of my book, "Husband, Liar, Sociopath: How He Lied, Why I Fell For It & The Painful Lessons Learned" (available via Amazon.com, just click on the title or book cover) will be published here on Lovefraud. To read prior chapters, please see the links at the bottom of the post. Chapter 29: It Depends Upon What The Meaning Of The Word “Is” Is Paul manipulated the well-intentioned therapist into becoming complicit in Paul's self-serving altered version of reality—to view Paul as the perfect, calm, devoted, caring father and husband, while I was clearly on edge emotionally due to my declining mental health and jealousy over Paul and Anne-Marie's business partner …

Some Sociopath Tools–Word Salad, Diversion, And EvasionRead More

Every week, a chapter of my book, "Husband, Liar, Sociopath: How He Lied, Why I Fell For It & The Painful Lessons Learned" (available via Amazon.com, just click on the title or book cover) will be published here on Lovefraud. To read prior chapters, please see the links at the bottom of the post.   Chapter 28: All The World's A Stage—To A Sociopath I researched marital therapists, searching for a male counselor (hoping to make Paul more comfortable) with an office near Paul's work so appointments would be minimally disruptive to his stressful, all-consuming job. And so the charade began. Marital talk therapy with a sociopath is like an art appreciation lecture for the bl …

Marital Therapy With A Sociopath–Don’t Waste Your TimeRead More

Every week, a chapter of my book, "Husband, Liar, Sociopath: How He Lied, Why I Fell For It & The Painful Lessons Learned" (available via Amazon.com, just click on the title or book cover) will be published here on Lovefraud. To read prior chapters, please see the links at the bottom of the post. Chapter 27 is so long, half of it appeared last week and the second half appears below. Chapter 27: Nightmare On Elm Street (part B) We moved into the house in late November. I had almost no help from Paul emptying boxes and setting up the house. I had no close friends yet who could lend a hand. My ability to service my previous clients waned. Most of my work was concentrated on three m …

A Sociopath’s Pity Play and Your Empathy Cement a Toxic RelationshipRead More

  Every week, a chapter of my book, "Husband, Liar, Sociopath: How He Lied, Why I Fell For It & The Painful Lessons Learned" (available via Amazon.com, just click on the title or book cover) will be published here on Lovefraud. To read prior chapters, please see the links at the bottom of the post. Chapter 25/26:  Last week, I skipped a chapter. When someone pointed out the oversight, I backtracked and added it to last week's post. Chapter 27 is so long, half of it appears below and the second half will appear next week. Chapter 27: Nightmare On Elm Street (part A) While Paul worked in Connecticut and the kids and I were still in New York, I barely saw him, although we …

Once You’re Hooked, Sociopaths Ignore and CriticizeRead More