Victims have a certain way of walking, and psychopaths can spot it. That’s the conclusion two bloggers for Psychology Today reached, based on a scientific study released last year.
The study, Psychopathic traits and perceptions of victim vulnerability, was authored by Sarah Wheeler, Angela Book and Kimberly Costello of Brock University. The abstract states:
The purpose of this study was to determine whether individuals scoring higher on psychopathic traits would be better able to judge vulnerability to victimization after viewing short clips of targets walking. Participants provided a vulnerability estimate for each target and completed the Self-Report Psychopathy Scale: Version III (SRP-III). Higher SRP-III scores were associated with greater accuracy in assessing targets’ vulnerability to victimization.
Psychology Today blogger Marisa Mauro, Psy.D., explained the study further. A group of male university students were asked to watch video clips of 12 people walking. The videos were shot from behind, and the students were asked to rate the ease at which each could be mugged. Several of the individuals had, in fact, been victimized. The students who scored high in psychopathic traits were better at picking out the people who had already been mugged.
Mauro works as a prison psychologist. Based on her experience and this study, she wrote:
Certain personal characteristics are associated with tendency to be on the receiving end of bullying such as harassment and manipulation. I have found that the demonstration of confidence through body language, speech and affective expression, for example, provides some protection.
Wallflowers
Another Psychology Today blogger, Jeff Wise, also commented on the study and what it says about victims. Wise wrote that he recently came across a guy who seemed to have the traits of a psychopath. The man was charming, good-looking, athletic, financially successful—and he left a trail of destruction in his wake. His victims sounded like wallflowers. Wise wrote:
The women who wound up on the receiving end of his attentions were individuals who, in their own description, were not very worldly, experienced, or outgoing. They were psychologically vulnerable and hence ill-equipped to either resist this fellow’s predations or to deal with them emotionally after they had occurred.
Wise concluded that, “people who are on the receiving end of crime often do mark themselves out, if only subliminally.” Mauro suggested that people can decrease perceived vulnerability by projecting dominance—more eye contact, less movement of the hands and feet.
If only it were that easy.
Traits of targeted women
The research both bloggers quoted described a particular situation—people walking down the street, and how vulnerable they might be to being mugged. It should not be generalized to describe all victims of psychopaths. After all, how many of us were involved with muggers?
Consider the research by Dr. Liane Leedom on women who were targeted by psychopaths. She found that they have three traits in common:
- Extraverts. The women are outgoing, competitive, strong-willed and liked excitement. Sometimes they are free-spirited.
- Cooperative. They are high in empathy, tolerance and compassion. They value getting along with others, and are willing to compromise their own interests for the larger picture.
- Invested in relationships. They like being around people. They are sentimental and focus on special moments.
Dr. Leedom’s research relates to women. But I’ve heard from many Lovefraud readers, both men and women, who were successful, take-charge individuals—until they met the psychopath.
Personally, I don’t think anyone who watched me walk down the street would tag me as timid or vulnerable. I’m an athlete, and my stride is confident. But I was victimized by a psychopath, who took $227,000 from me, and cheated on me incessantly. And the guy started setting his hooks via e-mail, before he ever saw me walk.
Maybe projecting dominance would work to avoid muggers. But it’s not going to stop victimization by a card-carrying psychopath intent on finding a resourceful new supply.
Lostnconfused
Ox and Lesson,
I think you two have nailed it it on point. The other day when I had lunch with my friend, I told her” if ONE person in my life told me to go back to my spath, I probably would. I tell people my story because deep inside I am hoping that someone will say, she loves you. Go back and make it work. Go back and drop everything in ur life to be with her. Its true. Im ashamed to admit it, but its true.
It makes me sick that I want to go back to her, knowing that she was wrong. But my heart ALWAYS forgets that she is wrong” it’s a war with myself and it hurts so much.
She has lived alone forever, and she is FINE. I KNOW SHE IS. IM the one that’s hurting so much, and in my own hurt, I am hurting the people that rescued me, my mother and my family.
Lesson, your right” I want to know everything about spath in hopes that maybe someone will tell me to work it out with her” but that, just simply is not an option.
Sometimes I hope that I find a new relationship, a healthy one” so I can heal. But that only starts my dependency cycle all over again.
Lostnconfused
Also, my spath MIGHT not even be an SPATH (but yes, i will still admit, mostly to myself, that she has a LOT of the characteristics)…
But, it was still a toxic relationship.
Thats what i keep reminding myself.
I was reading this article..
It was helpful to me… all the TOXIC parts, described my realtionship SO well.
http://ezinearticles.com/?Toxic-Love-Relationships—How-to-Recognize-and-Escape-Them&id=1534917
Maybe it will help someone else too..
ErinBrock
In our pain, we look for the ‘easy’ button.
They exist…..but so does MORE PAIN. It just extends the pain payday.
I know……I extended it for 28 FRIGGEN YEARS!
If you ever do come across THAT person to encourage you to go back…….be prepared to tell then to FUCK OFF! And end THAT relationship too! 🙂
ErinBrock
Toxic is Toxic is Toxic is Toxic…….even if you spell it backwards…..Cixot. It’s TOXIC!
tox·ic (tksk)
adj.
1. Of, relating to, or caused by a toxin or other poison: a toxic condition.
2. Capable of causing injury or death, especially by chemical means; poisonous:
one/joy_step_at_a_time
lostnconfused – Well, someone DID tell me to go back to my n ex girlfriend, and I went, ’cause i was looking for someone to say, ‘hell ya’. I was pathetic. I wanted her soooo much!
and then endured a few more months of pain …much much worse pain…and then a few more months….then as ‘only friends’ she came to visit me 2 january’s ago, and THAT ENDED WITH A FIST PULLED IN FRONT OF MY FACE!
So, yah, get someone to suggest going back to her is a good idea…if you aren’t messed up enough now.
one/joy_step_at_a_time
HOPEFORJOY!!!! WOOOHOOOO…MOVEMENT IS AFOOT!!!!
Lostnconfused
one step and erin,
I appreciate your words.
LF helps me so much… coming back here, you all knowing my story and encouraging me to do the right thing with no selfish motives is very amazing.
I will take your advice, ofcourse i will.
I just forget how right you all are, sometimes.
lesson learned
Lost,
First of all, I was picking up on your vibes. I believe I said I hoped you wouldn’t do that, but it was the vibe I was picking up in that you wanted too. I don’t think any of us, including ME would wish MORE time in hell on anyone, BUT since I went back and ignored exactly what your’e dealing with now because I wasn’t “Sure” I got my ass kicked some more……..welll and some more…..and a little more….lol!
It took a LONG TIME TO absorb what I was seeing. It reached the point that I KNEW he was so toxic that it didn’t matter what I would say or do, NOTHING and HE was not going to CHANGE!!
It was just the point that I personally had to reach.
ANd I did. So will you.
Try not to be too hard on yourself. Whether you stay or you go back. I can’t make judgments on anyone when they are compelled to do something, except share what I know, pray that they make the right choices for themselves in wanting to better themselves and live a S/P/N free life. For all the stories I’ve seen here and how so many have gone back time and time again, I’m not in a position to say ANYTHING about it. But I would be the first to encourage you NOT too, even though you WANT too….
Make sense?
I hope you stay clear!!! In the long run, even though it’s painful, it will be worth it. It’s hard to integrate, this horrible disease running all over the planet, but even if she is not spath, it is NOT a healthy relationship for you and it seems that she is not capable of giving that to ANYONE!
Hopeforjoy
Dear EB and One steppers,
Thanks for the high fives! It’s AMAZING to be getting some movement in the right direction. I will have some grief over the loss of a dream but that’s okay.
EB had 28 years of it, Skylar 25 years. I had 20 years of being with someone I really didn’t know at all. I fully take responsiblity for not standing up for myself, losing my voice. Now I get the chance to start over, some never get the chance because the end up becoming alcoholics or commit suicide or become clinically depressed. So I consider myself damn lucky.
TOWANDA! If it weren’t for you guys here, I would be in bbbbbaaaaaaddddddddd shape!
ErinBrock
Always look for the rainbow…..NOT the storm clouds!