Every week, a chapter of my book, "Husband, Liar, Sociopath: How He Lied, Why I Fell For It & The Painful Lessons Learned" (available via Amazon.com, just click on the title or book cover) will be published here on Lovefraud. To read prior chapters, please see the links at the bottom of the post. Chapter 22: The Show Must Go On “Where secrecy or mystery begins, vice or roguery is not far off.” — Samuel Johnson Keeping my life all but invisible and inconsequential to Paul was not the only pillar upon which the “success” of my marriage (i.e., lack of tension) depended. Another pillar was accepting living in an information void. Secrecy is symptomatic of soci …
Help for building your support team so you can end a toxic relationship
By Amber Ault, Ph.D., MSW Starting September 24, 2016, I will be hosting a five-week Roller Coaster Relationship Recovery Seminar & Support Group by teleconference for people in the US and EU. I especially invite readers of Lovefraud.com to join me in this powerful, supportive environment dedicated to cultivating the skills and strategies you need to create your best, happiest, sanest life possible after a difficult relationship with a toxic partner. In my recent book, The Five Step Exit: Skills You Need to Leave a Narcissist, Psychopath, or Other Toxic Partner and Recover Your Happiness Now, I recommend that anyone who is involved with a toxic partner, preparing to …
Help for building your support team so you can end a toxic relationshipRead More
How do I avoid dating a sociopath like my father?
[youtube_sc url="https://youtu.be/UKtYJyhTe40" title="How%20do%20I%20avoid%20dating%20a%20sociopath%20like%20my%20father?"] A 24-year-old woman asks for advice. Her father is a sociopath, and so was her boyfriend. She doesn't know what a healthy relationship looks like so how can she learn to avoid dating another sociopath? I explain that the young woman not only had poor role models, she's suffering from a betrayal bond. The best thing she can do is work on her personal recovery. Then, I tell her how to protect herself from sociopaths. Letters to Lovefraud Videos is a new feature of Lovefraud.com. If you have a question that you'd like me to answer in a video, please send it to donna at l …
Florida judge is publicly shamed for berating a domestic violence victim
[youtube_sc url="https://youtu.be/gM7Q5M2Yuy0" title="Judge%20Jerrii%20Collins%20reprimanded%20by%20Florida%20Supreme%20Court"] A Florida woman called the police in April 2015 the father of her child choked her and threatened her with a knife. The man was arrested and put on trial. Suffering from anxiety, the domestic violence victim failed to show up to testify. Florida Judge Jerri Collins berated the woman, charged her with contempt of court, and threw her in jail for three days even though the victim pleaded that she had a 1-year-old child to care for. On Wednesday, Judge Collins was publicly reprimanded on live TV for her "intolerable" behavior by the Florida Supreme Court. This …
Florida judge is publicly shamed for berating a domestic violence victimRead More
No Contact vs Justice
Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following letter from a reader who posts as "justlikeyou." I will not give up my power. You have taken enough from me. First a little background. I'm a nurse. I'm a proud American. I have worked in the field of developmental disabilities for 20 plus years. I have lived in California all of my life. California is unique in the way we serve individuals with developmental disabilities. There are families who move to this state simply because of it. In 1969 the Lanterman Act was passed in California. Simply put “The Lanterman Act declares that persons with developmental disabilities have the same legal rights and responsibilities guaranteed all other p …
Some Sociopath Tools And Why They Work
Every week, a chapter of my book, "Husband, Liar, Sociopath: How He Lied, Why I Fell For It & The Painful Lessons Learned" (available via Amazon.com, just click on the title or book cover) will be published here on Lovefraud. To read prior chapters, please see the links at the bottom of the post. Chapter 21: A Second Look What was Paul really doing? What were the specific tools and techniques the master puppeteer employed that are also used by fellow sociopaths and manipulators? Paul started by using the technique of devaluing or minimizing my needs. As a sociopath, this came naturally to him, because a sociopath truly places zero value on anyone's needs but his own. By P …
Domestic violence and brain trauma
Many women who endured domestic violence suffer from headaches, memory loss, and confused thinking. The cause may be traumatic brain injuries due to blows to the head. Women may be exposed to the same type of head injuries as football players. Fists not football: Brain injuries seen in domestic assaults, on Foxnews.com. …
I help him escape; she manipulates him back and wipes out all his money
Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following letter from a woman whom we'll call "Carlotta." I started out close friends with a man married to a sociopathic woman, which later turned into a romantic relationship. This woman was evil to the core. He attempted to divorce her multiple times, but to no avail. She always used manipulation to get him back. Once back, she wipes all the money out that I helped him save. She took every, every penny he had and left him with nothing. He made very good money, plus got a pension to boot. She would take everything for herself. His bank accounts never had more than a few dollars in it. She took out multiple loans in his name (she conned him into …
I help him escape; she manipulates him back and wipes out all his moneyRead More
Once You’re Hooked by a Sociopath, Expect Double Standards–Remember It’s All About Them
By O.N. Ward Every week, a chapter of my book, "Husband, Liar, Sociopath: How He Lied, Why I Fell For It & The Painful Lessons Learned" (available via Amazon.com, just click on the title or book cover) will be published here on Lovefraud. To read prior chapters, please see the links at the bottom of the post. Chapter 20: What Double Standard? Blinding me even further to how emotionally vacant my relationship with Paul was becoming was the joy and exhaustion of motherhood. It was beyond anything I had ever experienced, anticipated, or imagined. My love for Jessica was so profound and deep, as if I had discovered a hidden, untapped well of joy inside me. Once Jessica was born, I k …
Once You’re Hooked by a Sociopath, Expect Double Standards–Remember It’s All About ThemRead More
She’s pregnant with his twins, and catches him in the act, having sex with another woman
Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following story from a reader whom we'll call "Janeen." I was in an on again off again abusive (physically and mentally) relationship for the past year with a narcopath. He had numerous online accounts and profiles on dating sites where he would find women that he could lie to about who he was, what he did, how many kids he had ”¦ everything. The only truth he told was his name. I found this out the hard way; I was one of those women. We had met online and within a month I was living with him in a different city, an hour and a half away from my friends and family. He would start arguments with outlandish accusations every time I went back home to vi …
She’s pregnant with his twins, and catches him in the act, having sex with another womanRead More