How to recognize and recover from everyday sociopaths - narcissists

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With her intense rage, lack of remorse and hate, she seems “possessed”

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Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following story from a reader whom we'll call "Mario." My wife peed in my drinking water then turned down the lights and then laughed after I drank one gulp. She spent the night with a lesbian lover the night my grandmother died. She told me she didn't care that our 1 year old daughter was falling off the bed 3 feet to a concrete floor, raised a fist to punch my 15 year old daughter in the face 3 times, punched me in the back of the head multiple times, pinched her fingertips together to cut my face to shreds while I was holding my computer trying to load the car to leave, threw car keys, plates, ceramic mugs, and punches at me while I was holding our 9 …

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The professional sociopath: an embezzler and tax cheat

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Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following story from a reader whom we'll call "Charlotte." I was married for almost 28 years. As the years went on, our marriage changed--especially after we had children. I noticed some lapses in parenting--carelessness, not following through on routines, etc. (Though I must say I was not aware of what a good marriage should look like, coming as I did from a narcissistic family background. I put up with way too much bad behavior, even initially.) I began to realize my husband was immature and irresponsible. He also was controlling, especially about money. I often felt gas-lighted by my husband: He would agree to something, then deny it, or spin it. …

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On Tinder: Raising awareness of domestic abuse

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Women in the Miami, Florida area who are scrolling through the dating profiles on Tinder, a location-based dating app, are seeing profile pictures that draw attention to the issue of domestic violence. Women in Distress, a domestic violence center in Florida, sponsored the awareness campaign with fake profiles in the exact place where women are looking for potential romantic interests. The organization also created a YouTube video about  the Tinder campaign, although it has been taken down. I wonder why? Domestic violence charity creates fake Tinder profiles for abusive men in order to show women who are seeking love online how quickly a relationship can 'turn ugly,' on …

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My sociopathic ex-husband is 100% committed to destroying my life

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Editor's note: The following story was received from a Lovefraud reader whom we'll call "Emilie." I was married to one. I left him for another one whom I've dated for over a year. My marriage ended with a violent incident. He is awaiting a criminal trial and is out of jail on bail. He is facing two child endangerment charges and was still awarded 50% custody of our two young boys. He fired a shot while we were fleeing to safety and the judge denied my restraining order, believing his testimony that he fired the shot to get me to stop and go back to talk to him. The case was appealed and again I was denied a restraining order. He is now harassing me by exploiting the legal system to control …

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The Boston bomber liked cats and dogs – does that mean he’s not a psychopath?

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Dzhokhar "Jahar" Tsarnaev was found guilty of all 30 counts against him for the Boston Marathon bombing. The sentencing phase of the trial is now underway. Yesterday, the New York Times reported that Tsarnaev finally showed some emotion. Some of his relatives from Russia traveled to Boston to plead for his life. They were sobbing, and the convicted murderer also began to cry. According to an article by Lovefraud reader Anne Stevenson, one of the factors in the jury's decision may be Tsarnaev's relationships with cats and dogs. Many psychopaths are cruel to animals. But if Tsarnaev was not cruel to his pets, does that mean he's not a psychopath? Well, I can say that my ex-husband, James M …

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He was the most cold, detached individual I ever met in my life

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Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following story from a woman whom we'll call "Veronica Lee." Little did I know as a young woman to be aware of the signs. He was so callous, he lacked empathy, he had no reciprocation of any kindness, he was aloof, he always blamed others for all his circumstances in life and as a child. I felt so sorry for him. He was the most cold, detached individual I had ever met in my life. I began to get so sick from mold exposure in the apartments we lived in. Then his mother and he decided to buy a fixer upper home that had severe water damage or sick building syndrome. I was misdiagnosed for over 23 years for a disease I never had. I was treated for that …

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Advice for Christians involved with sociopaths

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If you're a Christian woman, is it your duty to work harder and harder to please an abusive husband? If you're a Christian, should you hold out hope that God will change a sociopath? If you're a Christian, is it your duty to lead a sociopath to Christ? No, no and no, says Shannon Thomas, LCSW-S, a Christian counselor from Southlake, Texas. She explains why in her blog article: When a Christian meets a sociopath, on SouthlakeCounseling.org. If you've struggled with these ideas, please read this article. It may give you a new perspective. Link supplied by a Lovefraud reader.   …

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LETTER TO LOVEFRAUD: Deception from the first encounter, and every single day thereafter

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Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following letter from a reader who posts as "amille2." When my boyfriend..........or should I say the man I thought was my boyfriend...........walked out the door a couple of days ago, I told him I felt like I had been sucker punched. He replied, "No, you haven't" and shut the door. Just two days before that, I read his wife/girlfriend?'s grandmother's obituary whereby he was listed as the husband/significant other. The physical jolt that went through my body was immense ........... followed by the sound of every lie I had been told for the past 5 years clicking open in front of me to see ........... really see this time. Then they all came crashing down …

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After 30 years with a sociopath, she’s now having the time of her life

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Editor's note: Lovefraud received the following story from a 67-year-old woman whom we'll call "Maura." Lied, cheated, used me and others. Serial adultery, pornography, probable bisexual behaviors, never used condoms. I didn't know about the adultery until much later. He suffered a head injury, and I mistakenly attributed his bad behaviors to that. Violent and aggressive. Marital fraud; some possessions, like a boat and trailer, "disappeared." Claimed money and objects were stolen, but never reported thefts to the police. Nagged and pestered me constantly to buy large items, mostly vehicles, that we couldn't afford. Developed "hobbies" that kept him away from home on a regular …

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Do you speak psychopath? navigating and exposing disordered communication

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Anyone who has ever been on the receiving end of disordered communication knows that it can produce an array of madness and negativity. That's the point, after all. But, the more experience we have with it, the more we learn that it is all the same. The players may change, but the messages remain identical. Identifying the fact that the correspondence is, in fact, disordered is the first step to handling it positively. The next is to learn to read between the lines of the written word vomit to understand the actual meaning. When we can, it's liberating. Individuals high in psychopathic traits want no one to be happy. They are easily set off by the most minor of circumstances. They torture …

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