Back in October, the Lovefraud community was shocked to learn that the toddler son of our own contributor, Cappuccino Queen, went to his father’s home for a court-ordered visitation and did not return. Today the child’s father, Joaquin Rams, was arrested for his murder.
Joaquin Rams arrested for allegedly killing Prince McLeod Rams, on WJLA.com.
Dr. Liane Leedom will be posting about this case soon.
Truthspeak and Ox Drover, thank u for the support. I am soaking it up. I couldnt sleep last night and havent slept well for over a week. Im triggered left and right living with these two ladies. Somehow, I am now the scapegoat of the situation. It feels awful but I stand by my actions to try to protect the children being abused. The woman who reported it with me has played both ends against the middle and by allowing it to appear as though I acted alone in reporting the abuse, the case manager here at the house is perpetuating more of this behavior, in my opinion. This past week ive really struggled with my new life. Its been a very tough eight months and I feel as though I have aged a decade. Im exhausted mentally, emotionally, physically, and spiritually. Im having a difficult time continuing to prop myself back up. I not only feel alone but I AM alone with this awesome responsibility to this beautiful daughter that I am so blessed and grateful to have. I worry about how much she has seen me cry and struggle emotionally and if this will negatively impact her in any way. On a positive note, when she sees mommy cry she says “mommy u ok? R u sad? Can I give u a hug?” My child is developing empathy!!!
What a nightmare that CQ has been living. If not for her, this would the premeditated MURDER OF HER SON have been swept under the rug.
I remember after the passing of her son (now we know it was murder) and as she posted here, drama ensued, she didn’t get the support she was looking for. I’m sure she thought since we all know what our spaths did to us, surely she would be believed and supported. And I read everything that others wrote to her and grieved the insults and betrayal she had to endure.
There is a lesson in this. What we go through with our spaths is a battle for sanity. And it is ALWAYS made worse by the invalidation of others. Just goes to show, it’s really hard to wrap our heads around what an spath is capable of. CQ KNEW he murdered her son, but from the articles, I don’t think even she was able to imagine how depraved that spath really was. We can write it, but to FEEL the consequences of it, to grasp the awareness of their thinking, their behavior is to KNOW EVIL, not just to discuss it or know about it, but it is BIBICALLLY KNOW EVIL.
It dawned on me this morning that the spath practiced the murder. It was not the impulse of opportuntity. And my GOD, that thought just sickens me to my core.
No matter how EVIL we come to accept them to be, they are worse than what we are able to conceive, and God Help Us that we ever have to face what Hera has had to handle, and God help us and forgive any failure to give her ALL our support and compassion.
MiLo, thank u! She now knows how to blow the bubbles all by herself. Shes growing up so fast. I wish things werent so brutally difficult and that I could feel more joy in watching her grow.
That is why CQ did not post anymore here, Katy? I am away at times, and only witnessed the initial shock and support. I supposed CQ felt the need to concentrate on her blog for a while, instead of making articles here. I’m very sorry for CQ that happened on top of it.
Just the behaviour of the hospital staff at the time sickens me.
Yes, I agree with you, that this was planned, and I very much doubt that the “seizures” history is a coincidence.
When it comes to spaths: think the worst as possible, rather than “it can’t be that bad”.
Is Hera going to see all this imagining and speculation? I had various related thoughts but thought it would be extremely painful for Hera to see them if she wasn’t prepared in advance. Even if the thoughts had occurred to her and were not new.
But he was having seizures, wasn’t he? He was having them in CQ’s presence I thought if I am remembering correctly?
Yes, that is why CQ stopped posting here…she said that on her own blog.
I don’t understand the hospital either when they knew the injuries were obviously inflicted by someone. Maybe it’s a law that they cannot keep a parent from seeing the child? I don’t know…have no idea…just speculating as to why they allowed Rams to see the child in the hospital.
It’s unfortunate that victims are looked upon by law enforcement and the judicial system as whining pains in their behinds, but it happens and all too often. There seems to be a limit as to how many times a victim can ask for help before they are seen as annoying.
Psychopaths are relentless at pursuing what they want and they try to portray their victims as being unreasonable so authorities dismiss their accurate claims.
In this case it cost a beautiful llittle boy his life, and his loved ones a lifetime of heartache.
Hera, I’m so sorry the judicial system has failed you. May your little Prince rest in peace.
Vicki K
Louise, he started to have them first during one of the first unsupervized visits with Rams. I remember the first time, the hospital wouldn’t even allow her entry while Rams had lied he was the custodial parent…
He had one I think afterwards with her, when he ran a high fever.
The first time either gave him the idea, or was caused by certain maltreatment and then gave him the idea. All I’m saying is that I doubt it’s a coincidence. I’m pretty sure, he saw an opportunity in a natural possibility, and either used it or aggrevated it.
Raggedy,
I cannot speak for CQ or whether she still reads LF, but I do know that when people tell me their suspicions or beiefs of what the ex-spath was most likely up to, it gives me a feeling of validation by them, even though I have no need of another’s validation for myself to believe and suspect the worst of him. Of course, I am not CQ, and it may different for her. On the other hand, the most painful thing for spath survivors is not being taken seriously with their suspicions of the crimes and malicious actions the spath may have done… and that is what apparently happened here on LF to CQ even, and it sure happened to her in court, at the cost of precious baby Prince. It’s a bit sad to feel relieved authorities take her serious now and think the worst of Rams now (1st degree and possible capital crime) and we must hope the jury will see his actions at their worst motivation too. I also very much doubt authorities would go for capital crime unless they have the premeditated evidence for it. The fact that it took several months to make the arrest, despite having known early on from the autopsy that he was drowned, also suggests to me they probably wanted to be thorough so that they can nail him for 1ste degree murder, and not just involuntary manslaughter.
darwinsmom:
I agree.
Darwin’s mom, speculation about how greatly the child suffered is not that connected to validation, which itself is surely less of an issue since CQ is to some degree vindicated.
It occurred to me immediately that this evil person was staging the child’s health problems, but then I remembered that Hera said they ran in her family. It’s possible he staged everything because he knew of the genetic predisposition, and even the first seizure was induced or fabricated. I was reluctant to start talking about these things “out loud” here. I imagine prosecuting attorneys will be exploring these possibilities, though.
I have to say I am still glad if Hera is not reading. Hopefully she understands 100% that she has our support.