A woman goes to the philharmonic in New York City alone. She meets a guy who is also alone. He asks her for a date, she goes once, doesn’t want to go again. She doesn’t return his calls. He sends an e-mail demanding to know why. Woman is so astounded she posts it on the Internet.
Read An investment banker’s cover letter for a second date, on Reddit.com.
Story suggested by a Lovefraud reader.
MiLo,
I have a hard time resisting a witty man!
My BF has a similar wit, he just can’t seem to stop. He told me he’s been punched in the mouth a few times. LOL!
So that may be a self-limiting problem…
You know it sounds to me that he has the potential to be a writer! He’s good with words and apparently insightful.
I checked out the Ben Glenn site. It’s good info.
MiLo, my parrot has a “smart mouth” too….wonder where he got it? LOL He still says a few words (some choice ones, too!) in my husband’s voice, and the funny thing is they are used in an APPROPRIATE way! Kids and parrots! Yep, they are a hoot!
My ex has a parrot. I taught her to say “hello strongawoman” …it took me about 6 months but it was worth it. She says it all the time. Hmmm must be drivin spath boy crazeeee when he’s “wooing” his new victims
Strongawoman!!!! Yea, Great!!!!! They do tend to say things that you might not want them too. Mine only has 2 dirty words, one in my husband’s voice and one in mine, but fortunately he doesn’t use them often and only when he is MAD! I think 2-3 times in 10 years, but always appropriately!
The things I’ve tried to get mine to say he rarely picks up, but picks up more of the sounds he hears that I don’t pay any attention to….he rings phones and then answers them with “Hello…(pause) then “Oh, Hi!” He calls dogs long dead and tells them they are a “good girl” he meows, and barks, makes hawk sounds and quail sounds and turkey sounds (birds that he hears outside his window) He makes computer sounds and microwave sounds, door bells, growls, a sound I think is a burp, and keeps us in stitches. I’ve been trying to get him to say apple or banana for 10 years and he’s never said it, D’s been trying to get him to say “I taste like chicken” but he’s never said either of those things though they’ve been said to him 2-3 times a day for a decade! LOL
Strongawoman ~ Good one ~ I wonder if that parrot is long gone by now. LOL
Oxy ~ my parrot story ~ My friend owned a pet shop, she hand raised her parrot since it hatched. It had a huge vocabulary and sounded JUST like her. She kept it in the store to entertain customers and hopefully teach the sale birds how to talk.
Her store was in a small strip mall and the store next door got a new tenant, a pottery store that also conducted classes. During their first evening class, they hear sounds coming from the store next door (pet store), people talking and laughing, then screams HELP – HELP – CALL THE COPS. They paniced and called the cops. When my friend arrived at her store it was surrounded by cops, weapons drawn and on the bull horn saying – “Come out with your hands up and no one gets hurt.”
You guessed it – it was “Annie” the parrot who by then was laughing hysterically. When my friend turned on the lights, the bird said “Oh shit, now what”. They do seem to know when the time is right.
Milo,
Yea, mine says “Oh, sheet” in my voice and once when I woke it up at 2 or 3 a.m. by turning on the light. LOL I don’t say that often but appare4ntly they are like KIDS and once or twice of something you don’t want them to imitate they pick up immediately and the things you say every day WANTING them to learn, they NEVER do!!! LOL
That was funny! I bet even the cops and her neighbors had a good laugh about it after it was all over.
My doctor granddad’s last wife had a mina bird that talked and it really sounded like a human, it would say “come in” if someone knocked on the door and would say “Oh, doc, I’m soooo sick” and so on. They are nasty creatures though! My bird isn’t too bad, but I couldn’t do without him, he is too much a part of the family for 20+ years!
They are really a hoot, no pun intended. I have never owned one, but have “bird sat” a couple for my friends.
Another friend had an African Gray that also had a huge vocabulary when my friend adopted him. This bird was so bad his language was X-rated, with a Brooklyn accent no less. My friend’s cleaning lady was very religious and everytime the bird swore she said “Praise the Lord.” Now the bird swears up a blue streak, followed by – “Praise the Lord.” This one was also very nasty, would bite you everytime you opened the cage to feed or clean.
Milo, My bird is hand raised and is also an African Gray, but loves to be cuddled, but if you make him mad will bite in revenge. The first time I went on vacation for a while I had egg donor come over and feed him, when I got home I sucked up to him with his favorite foods (hot rice and hot mashed potatoes on a spoon!) Nope, he wasn’t satisfied til he had drawn blood once then he was back to liking to be cuddled. What a bird! They are sooooo smart. One researcher worked with an African Gray for 30+ years at a college and it could READ about 200 words, and do simple math and count. Not just “parrot” the words…
Another college has a border collie female that knows over 1,100 words (associated with toys) and will fetch the specific toy on the word being said. I’ve seen the video tape of that dog, amazing!
I am more disturbed by the comments than the letter. This letter, well, anyone who has wound up on LF has seen this crap before. I’d call this guy a spath, most likely.
BUT everyone down in the comments thinks he has ASPERGER’S!
I am both disturbed that the general public is so unaware of what looks to me like an obvious sociopath diagnosis candidate and also insulted that anyone would think an Aspie acts like this. Sure, we’re a bit clueless at times regarding social cues, but that guy is using blatant manipulation tactics. Not to mention, I’ve never heard of an Aspie acting like a creepy stalker! This guy is predatory. That is not an Asperger’s trait at all. Does anyone else think this guy just has a case of Asperger’s? Maybe I am totally clueless. Is this how an Aspie looks to the general public? To me, it’s not about social graces, but about intentions. An Aspie is a bit clueless and awkward, which can look even more obnoxious when they’re hurt or angry, but I don’t think they have bad intentions–at least none more sinister than the average person. A sociopath, on the other hand, is totally clueless, not quite as awkward, and has very bad intentions. Both conditions have the tendency to mask their true nature, but the true nature underneath is totally, COMPLETELY 100% opposite to one another. He seems to be masking what he assumes is very covert manipulation, dominance, control issues, a god-complex, and some misogyny.
Okay, as an Aspie, I am just pissed. I don’t want to write a comment on the thread in there. But I’m pissed. I also wish more people know about sociopaths. If they did, I think all those people would call him a spath. At least they all seemed to pick up that he is NOT NORMAL, which means their alarms are going off. That is good. Their instincts are telling them something is wrong, but they don’t know what it is.
Hey, wait, I think I just became a little more optimistic about all that. This means that the general public did a really good job of catching red flags. They just couldn’t assign them the correct name. Go team human (aka not-spath)! Now, let’s just get the word out so they can stop blaming Aspies for this nonsense!!!! We didn’t freaking do it!!!!
You might find this an interesting bird – the lyre bird
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VjE0Kdfos4Y
It mimicks every sound it hears from otehr birds but also other animals and even mechanical sounds, to impress a female with the most unique song…. he makes camera shutter souns, with zoom lens, and a chainsaw that cuts the trees of its endangered forests.