Reigh Storrow Mills Boss, the 7-year-old girl allegedly kidnapped by her father, Clark Rockefeller, has been safely reunited with her mother, Sandra Boss.
Last Thursday, I received a phone call from an ABC News reporter who wanted information about women who marry con men. At that point, I knew nothing about the case. The girl’s mother had just released a video appeal to the father of the child, pleading for her safe return. But I did know about marrying a con man. After speaking to the reporter for about 30 minutes, I put her in touch with Dr. Liane Leedom and two Lovefraud readers who were willing to be interviewed.
Here’s the story: How do smart women get taken by con men?
The story was mostly accurate. But one sentence exemplified the people’s confusion about con artists, sociopaths, psychopaths. The reporter wrote: “Leedom believes con artists seek out people who will be ‘good’ victims, just like a psychopath may seek out someone to kill.”
Con artists are psychopaths. And not all psychopaths are killers.
Blaming the victim
In her article about this case on Friday, Dr. Leedom drew attention to a Boston Herald columnist, Peter Gelzinis, who wrote a piece highly critical of Sandra Boss. He wrote that the con man, Clark Rockefeller, “managed to stay married to a brilliant Stanford/Harvard Business School world beater for about a dozen years before she apparently figured out her husband had no Social Security number, no valid driver’s license and no visible means of support.”
Readers posted comments in reaction to the story. Here are some of them:
She’s not missing!!!!! She’s with her father!
I agree that Ms. Boss has a lot of explaining to do. Fourteen years is a long time to remain in the dark about one’s spouse, assuming a person has two brain cells to rub together. And I think it’s pretty outrageous that she accepted a higher-paying position in England, when she knew it would damage Rockefeller’s rights to visit their child.
More support for con artist
With this, I started looking around the web for more blog comments. Here are some on the Topix web site, based on a Chicago Tribune article:
Massachusetts is notorious for taking parental rights from fathers and financially ruining them. Why wasn’t the mother prosecuted for abducting the child to England. God forbid the lunatics in the media question her…..
I think it is very important that a child has the right to a relationship with both parents therefore in Idaho where I live joint custody is the law of the land unless extreme abuse against the child can be proved, the social worker injured herself by running after and grabbing onto that car, that is ridiculous, she was never attacked, I don’t blame the Father for absconding with his child if he was required to only have supervised visits and yet the Mother was globe trotting with his child.
I do not agree that abuse against a woman or the Mother is good reason to require supervised visits because sometimes the woman starts the abuse, I have seen my sister in action and she beat the living crap out of her ex husband simply because he didn’t give her his paycheck!
Here are comments on a story published by CBS News, in which Reigh Boss’ former babysitter called Clark Rockefeller a “great father”:
The system is set up to cater to women, period. I hope this guy has a great life with his daughter.The only thing the money hungry bitch is worried about is $$$$$.
I still see that the mother is an instigator. I hope as a woman, that I would never take my child away from the man I had him/her with. No matter how much I hated him. My sister HATES her ex-husband but allows him to see his children all the time…you know why? Cause they love daddy too, it’s not just about mommy…when you do what this “shrew” did….THATS WHAT screws up a child. And now I am contradicting myself because the father has now done that. BUT SHE STARTED IT.
Learning needed
There are, of course, plenty of blog comments that supported the mother and criticized the con artist father. But I was looking for the comments that indicate how little people understand about con men, psychopaths and child custody.
Con artists are psychopaths, also called sociopaths. Here’s what we all, as a society, need to learn about them:
- Psychopaths can be either men or women.
- Anyone can be conned by a psychopath.
- Psychopaths make terrible parents.
- Psychopaths do not love their children. They use the children for their own purposes, and damage the kids in the process.
- Children should be protected from psychopathic parents.
- The issue is not whether the father or mother should get custody. The issue is that the healthy parent should get custody.
Oh and yeah one of his “smart” friends evidently is trying to get him to say I slandered him. But I never said anything mean or degrading about him at all.
So before I blocked him I told him that “slander” is not when you say “this guy did such and such”, but slander is when you say things like “you are a vindictive bitch with no life” which is what she wrote me, and I told him that I kept it just in case she was trying to start shit with me. I also told him that I wouldn’t start anything with them if they didn’t start anything with me.. and I could tell he accepted that and will likely call off the squad in a day or too. What a bunch of pathetic women that take a man like this who has destroyed their lives and friggen SUPPORT him. Oh well, I hope it’s all over now
WP–I totally agree!
Aloha,
I totally agree with your theory why some don’t ‘get it’. They don’t want to identify themselves with us because if they acknowledged what had happened to us, they would have to admit that they had been fooled too. Bang on the nail!!!
Swallow
Donna, Thank you so much for your contributions on this. I have several observations.
1 – I agree with nearly everything you wrote. It is extremely frustrating to read comments that criticize the women who get involved with psychopaths more than they criticize the psychopaths. Let’s put the blame where it belongs!
2 – I also agree with you that showing superficial evidence of being a “good father” does not trump evidence that one is a psychopath/liar. All those people who commented that Mr. Rockefeller may have lied about his identity, but at least he was a good dad, have no idea what they are talking about and could cause damage to the children involved.
I agree with you that psychopaths by definition do not love their children; by definition, they have no empathy and no remorse. If one can be certain a person is a psychopath, then one can be sure that person does not love his or her children despite any superficial displays. But in the absence of that certainty, I am worried that some people seeing this in the definition will mistakenly conclude that if a man appears to love his child than he cannot be a psychopath. This is false, obviously, but I think these displays of affection by psychopaths confuse everyone.
3 – I also notice you have singled out the comments that are most appallingly critical of Ms. Boss for her apparent fault of loving a psychopath. I agree–these are the comments that get under one’s skin the most!! But I hope you are doing this for professional reasons and not because you are truly allowing your buttons to be pushed by the ignorant people out there. Please do not take personally the misplaced and ignorant comments out there by people who apparently have an axe to grind. I agree they are frustrating and annoying comments but the focus should be on reaching more reasonable people and educating society as a whole. Some of these people who have a chip on their shoulder will never see the truth, so why focus on them? Please try to stay positive and work for change slowly. I think you are doing an incredible public service, and would hate to see you become discouraged by comments like this.
Yesss, to all. Despite all the evidence, all the history, all the STUFF even my most aware and clued in friends continue to say… BUT AT LEAST HE LOVES HIS CHILDREN. wHICH WOULD BE A GOOD THING IF IT WERE TRUE.
I KNOW he is using them up, setting them up to be targets. They are in their 20’s, and they have loving memories of him being there for soccer practice, and showing up for them, buying the stuff, etc.
How can I burst their bubble any more than I already have by leaving their “perfect” Dad.?
The P’s are so much more clever in their deceit than we are in our sincerity. Sincerity is just that, naked, raw, real. They plan and then they USE and LIE.
The only way I could MAYBE protect my kids is to kill them with kindness. Tell them my truth But it would only be mine.
So I will have to watch, just like at the football games, hoping my kid gets up after the mad, illegal, facemask pulling tackle.
Hoping they choose to stick up for themselves and still be fairminded.
I have cast my lot with fariness. Humble a place as that may be. Peace all.
Eyes: you have stated a great truth right there-The P’s are so much more clever in their deceit than we are in our sincerity. Sincerity is just that, naked, raw, real. They plan and then they USE and LIE
Great news!!!!
They got him!!!!
http://www.nbc5.com/family/17074941/detail.html
News report on this topic
Well I guess I was a little late. But you don’t know what a smile this news brought to my face today! It is great news when a story end this way. Believe me, it doesn’t happen as much as it should!! Why are our children just pawns in the court system, Department of Family services and other parties that dictate how we should protect them! Yet they refuse to see if the “parent” is emotionally stable? How this person who has no history is allow this much freedom to do as he pleases? Laws should be for all parties involved which includes “our children’s”!
Still more question concerning this man Clark Rockefeller
http://abcnews.go.com/TheLaw/story?id=5522209&page=1
Just glad the little girl is now with her mother and is safe!