Reigh Storrow Mills Boss, the 7-year-old girl allegedly kidnapped by her father, Clark Rockefeller, has been safely reunited with her mother, Sandra Boss.
Last Thursday, I received a phone call from an ABC News reporter who wanted information about women who marry con men. At that point, I knew nothing about the case. The girl’s mother had just released a video appeal to the father of the child, pleading for her safe return. But I did know about marrying a con man. After speaking to the reporter for about 30 minutes, I put her in touch with Dr. Liane Leedom and two Lovefraud readers who were willing to be interviewed.
Here’s the story: How do smart women get taken by con men?
The story was mostly accurate. But one sentence exemplified the people’s confusion about con artists, sociopaths, psychopaths. The reporter wrote: “Leedom believes con artists seek out people who will be ‘good’ victims, just like a psychopath may seek out someone to kill.”
Con artists are psychopaths. And not all psychopaths are killers.
Blaming the victim
In her article about this case on Friday, Dr. Leedom drew attention to a Boston Herald columnist, Peter Gelzinis, who wrote a piece highly critical of Sandra Boss. He wrote that the con man, Clark Rockefeller, “managed to stay married to a brilliant Stanford/Harvard Business School world beater for about a dozen years before she apparently figured out her husband had no Social Security number, no valid driver’s license and no visible means of support.”
Readers posted comments in reaction to the story. Here are some of them:
She’s not missing!!!!! She’s with her father!
I agree that Ms. Boss has a lot of explaining to do. Fourteen years is a long time to remain in the dark about one’s spouse, assuming a person has two brain cells to rub together. And I think it’s pretty outrageous that she accepted a higher-paying position in England, when she knew it would damage Rockefeller’s rights to visit their child.
More support for con artist
With this, I started looking around the web for more blog comments. Here are some on the Topix web site, based on a Chicago Tribune article:
Massachusetts is notorious for taking parental rights from fathers and financially ruining them. Why wasn’t the mother prosecuted for abducting the child to England. God forbid the lunatics in the media question her…..
I think it is very important that a child has the right to a relationship with both parents therefore in Idaho where I live joint custody is the law of the land unless extreme abuse against the child can be proved, the social worker injured herself by running after and grabbing onto that car, that is ridiculous, she was never attacked, I don’t blame the Father for absconding with his child if he was required to only have supervised visits and yet the Mother was globe trotting with his child.
I do not agree that abuse against a woman or the Mother is good reason to require supervised visits because sometimes the woman starts the abuse, I have seen my sister in action and she beat the living crap out of her ex husband simply because he didn’t give her his paycheck!
Here are comments on a story published by CBS News, in which Reigh Boss’ former babysitter called Clark Rockefeller a “great father”:
The system is set up to cater to women, period. I hope this guy has a great life with his daughter.The only thing the money hungry bitch is worried about is $$$$$.
I still see that the mother is an instigator. I hope as a woman, that I would never take my child away from the man I had him/her with. No matter how much I hated him. My sister HATES her ex-husband but allows him to see his children all the time…you know why? Cause they love daddy too, it’s not just about mommy…when you do what this “shrew” did….THATS WHAT screws up a child. And now I am contradicting myself because the father has now done that. BUT SHE STARTED IT.
Learning needed
There are, of course, plenty of blog comments that supported the mother and criticized the con artist father. But I was looking for the comments that indicate how little people understand about con men, psychopaths and child custody.
Con artists are psychopaths, also called sociopaths. Here’s what we all, as a society, need to learn about them:
- Psychopaths can be either men or women.
- Anyone can be conned by a psychopath.
- Psychopaths make terrible parents.
- Psychopaths do not love their children. They use the children for their own purposes, and damage the kids in the process.
- Children should be protected from psychopathic parents.
- The issue is not whether the father or mother should get custody. The issue is that the healthy parent should get custody.
Blind sided by a “Freight train” of a psychopath” – great description.
However painful, at least this poor woman now knows the whole truth and can begin healing. Up till now (and without proof) she has not only suffered the mind games and manipulation of a P but has had to endure the doubts and cruel comments of many others. Like many of us, she has been victimised many times over.
I do take heart though, that even if it takes a long time, these slime balls do eventually get too ‘cocky’ and give themselves away.
Swallow
This just again proves to me that sociopaths behavior is so unbelievable! Even when the sociopath tells you, you don’t believe them, because it is just so far fetched. These stories sound like works of fiction, but they are true. My exsociopath would say the most horrible, craziest, things. They were so far fetched that I thought he was joking. I thought that the “normal” sounding jargon was the truth and everything else was the joke. Maybe it is the other way around. Getting married and having a loving family was the joke. The crazy horrible stuff was the truth? Or was it all true or all a lie? I am worried about the crazy stuff he said because he “joked” about everything that Rockefeller DID. Like killing and abduction. Was it a joke, a lie, or the truth? I don’t know either.
My guess based on my experience with a sociopath, is that this Rockefeller DID sometimes say things that revealed his true nature to Sandra. But it was so far fetched, such a fictional character off some gangster movie, and such a dichotomy to his normal persona. She would have thought he was joking.
I do not know.. my ex-bf would sometimes talk about his dark side, and my first husband would joke about being a con-man or a chameleon, and about being paranoid.. but he NEVER hinted or joked about his suppressed rage and violence.
Dear Bird,
Yes, dear they do tell you some things and you may not know the truth from the lie, but the thing is that they ARE capable of things that no normal human would even dream of.
I’m a big joker, and have a “twisted” sense of humor, my kids and I are always “threatening” each other–my son C says he will put me in a nursing home, take my false teeth away and feed me lumpy oatmeal through a straw! Silly things like that. Or they may be joking while I am cooking and I will pretend to reach for an iron skillet to wave at them. But it is all in fun. But the psychopaths I think like to talk about scary things because it makes them feel powerful, like a three year old who is scared of a dog and might threaten to “blow up” the dog. Unfortunately, the psychopaths are not three years old and they have the cunning and malice to do some of these things.
One would have thought that Rockefeller would have been a little more wary about kidnapping the girl since he is most likely the man who killed those people 25 years ago (finger print evidence) yet, he was apparently so intent on getting hold of the child (probably to upset the mother and prove his control) he didn’t obviously realize that the whole world would turn out looking for him, he didn’t control his impulses, he got cocky, after having apparently successfully gotten away with the hiding out for 25 years—
They are so spooky, the ones that are violent, like my son and my P-father before him.
NOT all Ps are like that, not all stupid enough to do violence, or plot “way out” things, but never the less, I tend to be a bit more paranoid about what they will do than most people because I have been involved with ones that have and would kill again. Would brag abot doing so.
I know I have given you some “paranoid” advice before about the Baby Birdie, but I am cautious about safety before all else. I won’t put ANYTHING past a P. Grabbing a child, or like Amy Castillo’s X killing the children to “get back at her.”
For those mothers who are having to let the Ps have visitation rights, I sincerely recommend that they become “actresses” and to protect their children by being as manipulative as the Ps. If they aren’t married, don’t put the man’s name on the birth certificate. If he wants visitation make him PROVE he is the father. Don’t believe a WORD they say. NC if possible, but if you legally must keep contact open, don’t fight with them if you can help it and get into a “leg hiking contest” like two dogs with the kids in the middle. Even if they don’t physically hurt the children, they will usually take their anger at you out on the kids emotionally one way or another.
First off, do not trust them, or think that they have any regard for your child’s welfare except as a weapon to hurt you with.
I know that sounds terribly “negative’ but sometimes REALITY IS NEGATIVE.
Bird, my dear, I am SOOOO glad your X dumped you before the Birdie was born, and so glad you are doing so much better than you were right after he left. I know that there still must be so much pain, like just about all ofus, but I am so thankful that you and the Birdie are safely away from that rabid animal. I was so fortunte that my mother (dysfunctional herself) did marry my wonderful step father when I was 3 and he was such a wonderful mentor to me, and an example of a fine Christian man. He adopted me when I was six so that even if my mother had died, my P-bio-father would have no legal claim on me.
I hope and pray for you and the Birdie that there will come into your lives such a man to be the Birdie’s REAL FATHER, a guide and a mentor. Prayers and (((hugs to you and Birdie))))
Yes Birdie I agree with Oxy. Be as wise as a serpent and as gentle as a dove. If it takes a little dishonesty to protect BB from his evil influence, go ahead. Keep all his emails and letters. If he says anything threatening, make a note of the date and time. Because if it comes into court.. he will use all forms of manipulation to get what he wants. Hopefully he will forget you ever existed. Poor girl. I hope you can just enjoy the baby, if it was me, I would have a hard time. I would be very resentful of having to become a single parent. Best of luck, sweet birdie
Dear Kat,
In my opinion, A single parent to a baby is a MUCH BETTER OPTION than having a PSYCHOPATHIC CO-PARENT in the mix. With no “co-parent” who is manipulating and using your child for their own purposes, the drama and the insanity, and the other crap is NOT THERE. You are SAFE from the harassment and damage that the psychopath can and will do to both you and the child. Safe from the worry about what will happen to the child if you were to die or become disabled.
I have been both a married stay at home mom and a single parent, so I pretty well have the idea on who both of them work, and personally the single parent role isn’t all that bad. It is financially, but at the same time, I MADE my children a “family” of other single parents and their children, including male single parents who were good role models for my kids and “uncles” and “aunts” and “cousins” so that they were not without support and love. My little group of closely bonded single parents did things as a group with our kids, we exchanged baby sitting, we camped, we gardened, played music, and did all kinds of things as a group with the kids. In fact, my son C told me the other day (he’s 38 now) that it “was a good life” and “we had everything we needed” and “I can see how hard you worked to make sure we had support and love and male role models.”
And, looking back on those years as a single parent before I remarried (7 yrs) they WERE good. Sometimes tough financially, but LOTS OF LOVE AND SUPPORT for both me and my children.
We lived financially “hand to mouth” but we still had lots of fun.
I agree Oxy, and our family before I remarried was fun, those were some of the hardest but most rewarding years of my life. But what I meant was, lots of times with new moms, people can talk like nothing is important but the baby. I’m just saying if it was me, I would be like.. thanks bud, I really needed a baby to care for on top of getting my heart ripped out. The mommy is important too.
Oh, abslolutely, Kat, and I am so proud of how Bird has made such progress in not only taking care of BAby Birdie, but in taking care of Bird (herself) as well.
I just read the Boston news link on the other kidnapping thread that Dr. Leedom posted. This predator “Rockefeller” is such a FRAUD–and likely a murderer as well.
It must amazes me the lengths that these people go to, to put up a front and how they manage to elude the police for so many crimes. Fortunately, their arrogance brings many of them smashing down though. This guy had apparently gotten away with murder for 23 years, scamming his way across the country, presenting himself as some “hot shot” then marrying this poor deluded woman. You would have thought that he would have known he couldn’t get away with kidnapping, that the entire world would turn out looking for that little child, but his arrogance (and past successes) left him vulnerable to his own worst enemy, HIMSELF.
And this yahoo was “successful” if you equate that to staying a step ahead of the law for all those years. But his own arrogance caused his downfall.
I look back at my own situation with the ARROGANT Ps in the family and how their own arrogance brought them down–and yet, they still do not see that, they still blame others for their down fall. They just don’t get it. They are NOT the center of the world, they are NOT the smartest people in the world, and they sure as heck are NOT the MOST IMPORTANT PERSONS in the world, and not even in my world. I can’t believe that they ever convinced me that they were THAT IMPORTANT TO ME, that I couldn’t LIVE without them, that without them I was NOTHING. They have nothing to offer me, never did have anything except the “fantasy” that they painted for me on a canvas of air—well, it has evaporated, and it is GONE, and I like the VIEW from here (reality) a lot better.
Music please:
“I can see clearly now” (ta da)
Oh,yea, I know, I can’t carry a tune in a bucket with a lid, but you get the idea! LOL
I am now joining kat-o-nine, in that the sociopaths girlfriend wrote to me yesterday over email! What drama these people are into. My friend asked if I am sure it is her, and I thought that was a good question. I have no way of knowing that it is her, it could be him! My new goal in life is to CUT the drama. These people brought so much drama into my life, that I did not ask for. I want to build a healthy life for my family and focus my energy on what matters. I do not want to live my life around people who fabricate drama. You are right OxY. I will not let their arrogance and drama into my mind and life, anymore. They are not important.
My dear sweet Bird!!!!
Fly away free! It is unbelieveable that he/she/they can’t seem to forget about you isn’t it? They have to poke their heads in every so often to see if they can make your life miserable with their LITTLE DRAMA—they just want to make sure that you haven’t recovered too much so they can chuckle in glee at what a LOSER YOU ARE! LOL Well, my dear Bird you are the BIGGEST WINNER OF ALL!!! You are FREE!!!! They are so arrogant that they can’t see the truth if it hit them like a freight train!
Bird, you have come so far in such a short time with heavy responsibilities. I am so PROUD OF YOU and how you have risen to the occasion, and I know it has not been easy going through the last three months of pregnency and labor and delivery by yourself (except for your wonderful friend who was your delivery coach) and all the post-partumn stuff.
But you are a wonderful trooper, Bird and the Little Birdie is also FREE of this P-sperm donor as well. That was all my P-bio-father was, a SPERM DONOR.
The Birdie is the most fortunate child in the world, Birdie has a very smart, loving mother who has sense enough and back bone enough to put the Birdie’s SAFETY FIRST before anything else! And BTW I just happen to think too, that she is one of the most loving and caring people in the world! ((hugs))))