Last week, Lance Armstrong gave up his fight against doping charges. For two years, Mike Anderson was Armstrong’s personal assistant, during the height of his racing career. Anderson’s story, published by Outside magazine, makes you wonder.
Read My life with Lance Armstrong, on OutsideOnline.com.
Interestingly, Sally Jenkins, a columnist for the Washington Post who co-wrote Lance Armstrong’s book (It’s Not About the Bike), rode to Armstrong’s defense. She wrote, “Lance Armstrong is a good man. There’s nothing that I can learn about him short of murder that would alter my opinion on that.” Jenkins is also the sportswriter who originally believed Joe Paterno when he said he didn’t know that Jerry Sandusky had been accused of molesting a child.
Link to Mike Anderson story provided by a Lovefraud reader.
Thank you for sharing this article, Donna. It helps me to cope with my current situation – an ex (who I believe is a sociopathy/psychopath) that continues his smear campaign against me. He’s telling people I’ve done what he’s done…….and it appears he’s come to believe his own lies. People believe he is an upstanding member of the community who is known for his high level of integrity. If only they knew what’s going on below the surface.
Any theories on why the S/P’s so easily start believing their own lies? Could it be due to their not having a true sense of self and tendency to mold their personalities to whomever they are with? My ex was always so proud of his ability to adapt his personality as easily as a chameleon. Makes me want to barf.
Thanks Donna. This was an interesting read. I had actually suspected he was one (along with people like Steve Jobs) based on some of the stories I had heard about him. At this point, I wouldn’t be surprised if he had made up his cancer for attention. I know, that is sad that my mind would even go there.
The interesting thing, for me, that came out of this article was the question: Why do people keep believing the psychopath after it becomes clear that they have left a trail of victims?
For example, every ex boyfriend of mine (except for the ex spath) would have nothing but good things to say about me if asked. I don’t have people out there who wish me harm (except for my ex spath of course). Luc, on the other hand, has left loads of people who will testify under oath (including his own family) to how much damage and destruction he causes. Of course, every time this happens Luc runs his typical smear campaign calling us all crazy and just bitter because he is so wonderful.
In court, my lawyer gave some analogy about 500 french men all saying the same thing and after all these people say the same thing…shouldn’t we believe that there could be something to it? Sure, maybe if one competitor of Lance’s (who had lost and was a sore loser) was the only one accusing him of being a terrible person and a drug user..this might be suspect; however, when everyone comes out of the woodwork and says the same thing – its probably true.
That being said, I brought victim after victim into court with me to talk about how abusive Luc is and how dangerous he is. Of course, in true Luc fashion his defense is that we were all bitter and scorned. Was the police officer I brought scorned too? I think not….
People like Lance (psychopaths…yes I am going to make that leap), are charming and very good at acting like the victim no matter what. When people who really know these people start talking…the public should listen because its probably true.
In my quest for books to read before my surgery, I found a copy of the book about Lance and bought it ($2 in good condition hard back with good dust jacket) becaue I had read somet things about him that made me think he was HIGH IN P TRAITS.
Rather than “name calling” so much and labeling people Ps, I have started trying to think of them as “higher or lower” in psychopathic traits.
Not all psychopaths are serial killers, or Hitler or Chairman Mao, but they are ALL “high in P traits” and maybe they wouldn’t have enough “crimes” to score a 30 on the PCL-R, but they sure wouldn’t be someone you would want to take home as a pet.
I think Lance Armstrong i s from what I have read “very high in P traits” and I have little doubt that he doped one way or another. That does not mean that SOME of the things he did in his life were not “nice.”
I think Steve Jobs was “High in P traits” but he was smart and successful in business, so EVEN PSYCHOPATHS can do a good thing now and then as well.
Well said Ox Drover. I only wish that my parasitic, bottom feeder, pond scum (I could go on and on) ex spath could do just one nice/good (or even successful) thing in his pathetic and embarrassing excuse of a life. Wait…I guess he was the sperm donor for my baby boy. I will chalk that up as the only good thing he created in his miserable life. I can understand, however, that there is a spectrum of psychopathy. I just happen to have been caught by someone on the low functioning end.
Dear C’Queen, unfortunately, some of the WORST people in terms of P traits are those who are in POWER AND CONTROL positions…Hitler, Chairman Mao, Stalin….others who are high in the emotional traits if not the criminal traits excel in business, sports, politics, etc. and become wealthy and powerful.
My husband used to be the private pilot for one of the world wealthiest (at that time) men and a man who was famous in the US for a lot of things….one of which was womanizing on a grand scale. Yet, he wasn’t “all evil” and he did a lot of things that were good for the human race in general and technology in particular (a’la Steve Jobs)
There are others though who are CRIMINAL and as such breaking the laws of society and victimizing people either with violence or with other forms of abuse….the AVERAGE score for ALL the criminals in us prisons today on the PCL-R is 22, and 25% of those in prison are 30 or above on the PCL-R.
Okay, the US has 2 million Plus inmates this moment…when those men and women go b ack out on the street, and 99% of them WILL go back out on the street….they are still HIGH IN P TRAITS….and there are 5 MILLION men and women on probation and or parole….though there are no statistics, you could say that ALL those paroled ex convicts (since at one time they were included in the INMATE POPULATION WHICH HAS 25% PSYCHOPATHS,, AND AN AVERAGE SCORE OF 22, as having that level of P traits.) are 25% psychopaths and all average 22 on the PCL-R.
If A=B and B=C then A MUST = C
Of course we know that there are those people high in P traits who are NOT “criminals” but we wouldn’t want them for pets. The Steve Jobs of this world, the Bill Clintons, the John Elliotts, and I could go on and on.
I know that I “harp on” criminals here, and ex-convicts because so many people here say that their ex who is giving them hell on wheels was at one time in prison….I say there are no EX convicts, just criminals who are either in side (inmates) or criminals who are outside, but they are all CRIMINALS and as such should be avoided like the plague.
Fark “rehabilitation” because the FEW that are “rehabilitated” are so few….and the many that get out, with a PhD in criminology after a term in prison are only worse.
Quit locking up some kid for an ounce of weed, and taking up needed bed space for the psychopaths and the ones HIGH IN P TRAITS and keep those in prison til their teeth fall out and they need a walker to ambulate. US violent crime rates HAVE GONE DOWN as more and more psychopaths are locked up for long periods of time. I think we need to do more of it.
As for those who are not “criminals” just users and abusers, then we need to educate people to avoid those people and to not become involved with them.
Some of the things in our society today that are “cool” and “hip” and really attractive to our young people or even OK with our young people need to be stopped and “de-cooled” I wish I knew how.
The number of parents raising their grandkids because their kids are too “hip” and “cool” to care for these children makes me sick.
I spent the day yesterday with a couple of friends who are raising the 2 oldest children (ages 2 & 3) of their only daughter who is way too cool to do such a thing. She is tatted up from head to toe, has her hair in an outlandish fashion, but this time her 3rd child is a boy, so her husband wants to keep that one, and she is “raising him” She was there at this family picnic event of my living history group…most of us have known her since she was a teenager and started off down “fool’s hill”
Her parents are in their late 50s and chasing after these two hyperactive children like Beagles after a couple of squirrels while the mother and father have decided now that they have a son, they won’t have any more kids…but they are not goinjg to take care of those two girls. The grandparents are so attached to the girls and they have no “right” to the girls even though they ahve raised them since BIRTH…the mother never took them home from the hospital even, that they are afraid to “cross” her because they are afraid the kdis will go back to her and be exposed to the drugs and other stuff at their daughter’s house. What a hard place these grandparents are in.
Look at our own Dear Milo, who has fought her daughter through thick and thin for legal custody of their grandson, and even YEARS LATER the daughter is able to go back to court (without a dime, while working as a hooker) and make them spend another $20-30 THOUSAND to defend their grandson from his mother’s “loving custody” The daughter has another child which Milo and her husband have elected not to “take in” because they feel they are doing ALL they can trying to raise the one grandson who is special needs. How heart breaking!
Yet, people “high in P traits” are the ROLE MODELS the singers, dancers, musicians, actors, sports stars etc. that these misguided kids pattern themselves after in our society which doesn’t seem to value moral compasses, or honesty and responsibility. Lance Armstrong is only one of those CROOKS who has “succeeded” in life. Doesn’t mean he never did anything “good” or “nice” just that good manners and sports or other success doesn’t mean you are a good person or an honest one.
Sorry for the rant. I’m just tired of these creeps being role models for our kids.
The P in my life did “nice things” in an effort to divert, manipulate, deceive, acquire positive remarks and attention. The “nice things” they do are part of the “mask”… and the “nice things” are always done in an effort to acquire something for themselves, and fulfill their own, personal agenda’s, however they see fit… It’s always all about them in the end… isn’t it.
Donna, thank you for this intriguing post. It certainly brings to light the question of “altruism” and “benefactors.”
In my personal experiences, those who crow loudest and longest of their own altruism usually have a personal agenda. The truest examples of altruism are those that go unnoticed and unsung. People who actually sacrifice from their own kitchens, bank accounts, and time to help others in dire need without any notice or compensation expected are those who are actually “giving from the heart.”
I’ve mentioned this, before, but I once had a female friend who seemed very supportive to me during my first separation and divorce. I was (again) in very dire straights, and she dropped by my apartment with a load of groceries and gave me cash to help pay for gasoline. I was so taken by her spontaneous generosity that I just wept and wept in gratitude. I later discovered that her personal “sacrifice” by purchasing these groceries and giving me cash was no sacrifice, at all. Her entire life was bought and paid for by her father’s substantial Trust Fund, and every financial need that she ever had was taken care of through this Trust. From medical insurance to utilities to copious veterinary bills, he paid her bills.
The point in recalling this person is that it is very, very easy to “help” someone when we’re not reaching into our own pantries and taking food from our own tables. The former friend’s personal agenda for this generosity was to cause me to feel indebted to her – that she could always help me (or, not) as long as I tolerated her rants, raves, and emotional loyalty. She did this to a number of females who were in trouble, and she would become obsessively enraged if these women began dating, got married, or began pulling themselves up by their bootstraps without her approval.
Armstrong’s type of spathy creates extensive collateral damage in that so many people who “believed” in what he did, his “causes,” and his innocence of doping have had their systems of beliefs shattered without so much as an, “I’m sorry for being a lying bastard. I was wrong, and I apologize for my choices.” Nope – he will maintain his Lance Stance to the bitter end, and his supporters will wander around in confusion as to whether or not they would be “guilty” of abandoning such a courageous icon for the sport of biking and cancer survival.
Shane – absolutely: it is, indeed, always about THEM.
Brightest blessings
Truthspeak,
Again, you’ve hit the nail on the head.
… and may I tell you…. although my P situations are very different from yours, I find myself relating to your comments while reading here, in such depth, and in turn find your words incredibly helpful to me… as are the words of all of the survivors here… however, there tends to always be something about your strength, how you put forth your most helpful, encouraging, wise words. I believe it may be your sensibilities, and how firmly you stand in your own, personal beliefs. I am reading here, more and more, most recently and feel most fortunate to have this place to come to and I hope to be able to give as much as I have been taking and utilizing in my own growth and recovery.
Blessings back to you, and everyone, here….
Shane, thank you for your kind words – if only I “felt” the way that I type! LOL
What are irrevocable in all spath entanglements are the damages, the carnage, the collateral damages, and their tactics. Whether it’s a romantic relationship, a friendship, a coworker, a supervisor, a parent, or a priest….they all follow the same pattern of behaviors and leave behind the same wake of harm. Our individual situations may be different, but the damages are the same.
And, the first thing for you to remember (whether you believe it, or not) is that you are an integral part of this vast Universe – you are vital, important, and valuable.
Thank you, too! I understand and agree that we all share a commonality when it comes to the damage done by, and the recovery from the disordered, no matter how different. It still tends to blow me away that the occurrences can so vastly differ, yet the behaviors of the P, all in all, are identical. I just read “Without Conscience”, By Dr. Hare. The light bulbs and alarms were going off like warfare in my head. I love that book. I find it brilliant, extremely validating and honestly it piqued an interest in profiling as a possible career change. Probably though, just a passing phase of sorts.
Have a wonderful day!