By: Linda Hartoonian Almas, M.S. Ed
There may be a correlation between psychopathy and malingering. Some studies support that increased PCL-R (psychopathy checklist) scores correspond with an increased potential for malingering, while others are less conclusive. Regardless, if psychopathic individuals, or those with such features, seek to gain or avoid something through manipulations, they are good at bringing their intentions to fruition.
What is malingering?
Malingering is defined as intentionally making up or exaggerating medical or mental symptoms in an attempt to avoid one or a variety of responsibilities. It is an intentional misrepresentation of facts in an effort to appear unable to work, or to fulfill other obligations. Additionally, with this avoidance, comes an external reward or some form of perceived personal gain. Often, malingerers see no other ways to achieve their avoidance goals.
Why do they do it?
This external payoff may come in the form of “getting something for nothing,” through unemployment or disability benefits, avoiding punishments in some circumstances, or getting out of having to perform what they consider to be undesirable tasks, and more.
The specific reasons and presentations may be as numerous, but the motivations are relatively consistent. Mainly, there’s something they must do, but don’t want to or feel they need to.
How do they malinger?
It is common for malingerers to feign mental or psychiatric conditions over physical maladies. They may feel that these are easier to fake, since diagnostic methods may be more difficult to quantify.
If malingerers claimed broken arms, for example, x-rays could quickly negate any false claims. The same is true for many other physical ailments.
However, it is easier to claim stress or distress, or a variety of other mental afflictions, that may render malingerers “unable” to work or make good on their obligations. In fact, they may even blame us for their “illnesses.”
Pathological lying and manipulation
With a primary element of malingering being intentional deception, it makes sense then that psychopathic individuals, or those with psychopathic traits, may be likely to engage in successful malingering. Two prominent traits psychopaths exhibit are pathological lying and manipulative and deceptive behaviors. Both are necessary in order to malinger successfully.
Most of what psychopaths say is false, or laced only with grains of truth that are usually seriously distorted. Since they lie and distort with ease, and manipulate people and circumstances to achieve what they want, it is easy to see how they are able to manage malingering successfully.
Parasitic lifestyle
Furthermore, it is common for individuals with psychopathic traits to live parasitic lifestyles. They are often careless, putting us in situations that cause us distress for their own gain or pleasure. Initially, they may look like our soul mates, wonderful long lost relatives, or saviors. They may come bearing gifts and making promises.
However, we quickly learn that most of what they offered came with conditions. The promises failed to materialize, and that they, in fact, arrived on the scene to live off of us.
They may even put us in positions to pity them, fight for them, or defend them. Eventually, we realize that they view life to be about their needs, rather than those they are obligated to. Parasitic.
Why is this relevant?
When we unknowingly become close with psychopaths, we are going to be touched by this in some way, at some point in time. “The right thing” may be something they spend a lot of time addressing, but very little time actually doing.
Since it is common for individuals with psychopathic traits to fail to make good on their obligations and responsibilities, it is worth understanding.
When they find themselves in too deep, and it is impossible for them to shirk their responsibilities in any other fashion, they may simply choose to take themselves out of commission.
Practical application
Although malingering can take place for a variety of purposes and in a variety of different ways, let us examine the possibility of a parent doing so to escape paying child support. Many readers have probably experienced this, as it is a common challenge among those dealing with individuals exhibiting such traits. The motivations for attempting to eliminate the support may be numerous, but are less significant than the actual act.
It is true that many good people, who genuinely care deeply, are simply sometimes unable to adequately provide. However, in cases where we suspect malingering, it is critical to assess the big picture.
What is the history? What are some of their attitudes displayed prior to the malingering? Were there inconsistencies in stories or statements? Was it clear that elusive measures were being contemplated? Were the actions and the words, again, failing to match over time?
Are other bills going unpaid? Is there a telling history regarding who they are choosing to pay and who they are choosing not to? Is there a history of bankruptcies? Do most of the “explanations” begin with blame and end with lack of ownership and reasonable solutions?
Well intended individuals are typically not be satisfied with offering next to nothing significant for support, regardless of circumstances. Additionally, those who have genuinely lost the capacity to perform in their chosen careers often acquire new and different skills or do whatever it takes to contribute similarly and meaningfully.
Further, they do not lie about their intentions, indicating that they will provide in one respect and then not follow through when the opportunities present themselves.
When malingering is present, attitudes of complacency, or even satisfaction with the situations they have created may be present.
Is malingering possible to prove?
It is possible that medical professionals or evaluators can prove malingering? Like many other behaviors psychopaths display, the malingering is no different, in that they tend to lack the consistency that individuals who are truly suffering exhibit. Those too ill to work or perform duties, for example, may also be unable to recreate or participate in activities that would otherwise bring them joy.
However, successful malingerers may continue on with other activities, or even engage in things they would not otherwise participate in. In essence, out of work may translate into on vacation.
Actual symptoms of certain conditions they are faking often look much different, as well. They may go through the motions of doing what needs to be done in order to appear “ill” or to “recover,” but their actions still tend to look different than those who are legitimate.
Again, while assessing, it is important to examine the circumstances collectively. Does the individual have something to gain by malingering? If it appears that they may, that is a good indicator that they are malingering.
All the while, it is important to remember that a normal person’s interpretation of something to gain, and theirs, may look very different. Thus, making their intentions easier to conceal, unless reminded of the need for this awareness.
It may be necessary for providers and employers to ask probing questions, observe carefully, and gather pertinent outside information. The words cannot be trusted and taken at face value.
If clinicians consider all of the circumstances, and do even a small amount of research, they may come to know that further investigation may be necessary. Unfortunately, this is not always a priority until the issue comes into the forefront, somehow.
Who would do this?
It may seem odd that there are individuals who choose to engage in these behaviors. Aren’t they coincidentally harming themselves?
While that depends on individual circumstances, in many cases, they are. Nonetheless, the payoff that they are attempting to achieve may override logic and reasoning. Their eyes are on the prize, so to speak. Yes, that sometimes defies logic, which is another reason this may seem unbelievable.
Remember, we are not discussing a portion of the population that typically acts with anyone’s best interests in mind. Strangely enough, although they mainly act selfishly, sometimes, this even extends to mean their own.
As it is becoming my mantra, I will close with the suggestion that we take comfort in the understanding. It will allow for peace amongst disorder.
thanks Linda for bringing up this topic. I can think of 6 cases where Lovefraud readers have told me that the sociopath they were involved with pretended to have cancer. Sometimes the motivation was simply a sympathy play.
Linda, I am acquainted with a woman I believe is very high in personality disordered traits. She has been fired from every job she has had in a reasonable circle of where she lives. She is a nurse. She then went to travel nursing and was fired from several of those jobs.
After each of the firings she had to have surgery on some portion of her body which required months off work. At age 50+ you can always find some doc that will operate on some portion of your body if you try enough doctors and claim enough pain.
She was referred to the nursing board after the last firing and they made her take an anger management class and write a paper to keep her license.
She is now applying for SSD because her back hurts. I have not see that she is unable to do anything that she WANTS to do but if she wants someone else to do it she is unable to do it.
She is also claiming “deep dark depression, excessive miserieeee” as well.
Because she is also a spend thrift and her husband who does work is quite ill and has been told by his agency that he either has to take disability or find a sedentary job with their agency (none is available in their town or within reasonable driving distance)
She refuses to take the medications Rx’d by her doctors and instead takes “herbs and spices” which she has bad effects from. One “herbal tea” she took for her diabetes gave her such diarrhea that she lost 50 pounds in about 3 months. she quit that and now is back on another kind of “herb or spice” rather than the medication her doctor Rx’s
Her husband is a friend of my sons and mine and we dearly love him, but he is not going to divorce her at this stage in his life, age 62 and very ill, but she has gotten them into deep hot financial water. We sort of have to have contact with her from time to time in order to visit with him, but we also realize that she is not going to change for the better. So far her SSD has been turned down and I think it should be. she is perfectly capable of working except for being a biatch…maybe SSD should have a category of payment for psychopaths too lazy to work. LOL
The studies showing that therapy doesn’t help psychopaths I think would also or should anyway also show that they use those “therapy words” as ways to fake depression and mental illness in order to not work, or get disability.
In my experience with patients over the years I have found that patients with GRAVE physical problems that would keep them from working were denied disability, but that if I would put in the report that they were depressed (and they were usually VERY depressed about not being able to work) they would get the SSD approved.
It seems to me from my experiences with patients that a mental illness like depression or short term memory problem is much easier to get SSD approved than even some GRAVE physical illnesses.
Depression or STM loss is easier to fake than some other physical illnesses as well. Funny thing though, I have had patients whose depression was totally debilitating (one woman after her daughter was killed is still not able to go back to work as a teacher) but she has NOT applied for any kind of disability even though I have strongly encouraged her to do so and think she qualifies in spades for disability. she is going regularly to therapy and is under the care of a psych MD but there are weeks when she can’t get out of bed because she can’t quit crying.
Donna mentioned the psychopaths claiming to have cancer and raising thousands of dollars in donations…a couple of those that made the news have been prosecuted and sent to prison.
Sometimes the “disability” is for financial gain, and sometimes for empathy/attention or just to have someone else support them without them having to work.
Donna knows the case I am talking about, but I had a woman who was a “victim” that I allowed to come here to park her RV on my farm. She was down and out and needed a safe place to park. That was all I offered her, that and some assistance in finding a job, etc. but she did NOT want a job. she could have done some editing work over the internet for another lady we knew but wouldn’t even do that. Tooo upset. Too depressed. But she sure wanted to run a con on me. I quickly caught on and sent her packing off this place, but on the day she left she accused me of “not helping her find a doctor” (no money no insurance) but she had refused to go to the free clinic, and when I mentioned this, she said “well, yes, I didn’t go when you offered, (repeatedly) but you were so busy” (typical P, blame it on the intended victim.)
I didn’t become this woman’s victim thank goodness, because I saw quickly that she was not willing to HELP HERSELF. I gave her OPPORTUNITIES but she refused to take advantage of them, and I did NOT offer to be responsible for her.
In dealing with anyone I think we need to see how willing they are to take care of their own needs if an opportunity is presented to them. If they are unwilling to take advantage of an opportunity, then they are trying to play you. I think it is a RED FLAG in any relationship, not just in a “love” relationship.
Excellent article and not at all surprising. Consider the constant “one-up-manship” that they engage in. A victim’s gall bladder removal is minimalized by the spath, “I had my appendix out and…….”
Munchausen By Proxy. Very disturbing, but very typical.
Thanks for reading!
Yes, Oxy, their behaviors are telling, indeed. All of the points you make are so true. It’s disappointing to me when I hear of people in significant need being denied benefits, while others seem to receive freely, sometimes seemingly unnecessarily or perhaps even fraudulently.
I, too, have witnessed “therapy words” in action. It’s sad, but laughable when they are used. I think it heightens the presence of disorder.
I think your story about the woman who lost her daughter is interesting because that is the crux of depression. Although, I must admit it takes different forms in different people. I think her story helps illustrate my point. I feel that there is a difference. I agree with you.
I, too, believe that they may also use illnesses for attention, as both you and Truthspeak mentioned. It may also be another ploy they use to get the victims to internalize the blame, as well. “Look what you did to me,” mentality. Obvious misrepresentation. I also think it may be used as another means to exercise cotnrol, when all other measures have failed. Regardless, it is reprehensible. At the same time, would we expect anything more? We shouldn’t.
I am so happy that you avoided becoming the other woman’s victim. Once we know what to look for, watch out! Right? And it’s true, the red flags extend to all types of relationships!
Great article, Linda. You raise one of those very intangible points about Ps: the ones that play on our sympathy, are always in need, are endless black holes of need and often game tax payer public assistance with their “disabilities”.
“In dealing with anyone I think we need to see how willing they are to take care of their own needs if an opportunity is presented to them. If they are unwilling to take advantage of an opportunity, then they are trying to play you.”
This is a very timely topic for me because I think I’m dealing with one of these now. I don’t know if he truly can’t help himself or it’s an actual physical ailment or psychosomatic or BS or a combo of all. But, I will say this: He plays on my sympathies, I feel drained and guilty. And yet, it feels like I can’t help him: the more I try to help, the more he needs & his needs are very consuming. I keep telling him to go to therapy because I’m not a T and I don’t want to listen to all his problems all the time, but he says he can’t find a T & therapy won’t help. So, stalemate.
Clair: “the ones that play on our sympathy, are always in need, are endless black holes of need…” Black Holes Of Need…..
Sounds like he’s a soul-sucker….an energy parasite. HUGS
This is a very timely article.
The ex had a mystery illness that kept him planted on the sofa for a entire six month period. He was sick, so sick. Tired all the time, achy, just not feeling well at all. He refused medical help. He managed to drag himself up to go have a few beers several times a week.
Then the mystery illness became more dramatic. One of the ways he got me to come back to him was to insinuate he had pancreatic cancer and that the prognosis was very grim.
He’s obviously still alive.
During the final D&D he claimed to have been diagnosed with type 2 diabetes. A couple of people have told me he still drinks every day, uses copious amounts of marijuana, and lives an entirely unhealthy life. His new “house mouse” that was my replacement has to take care of him all of the time (I feel so incredibly sorry for her but I’m happy that it’s not me). He now has “anxiety attacks” that have required emergency medical care. I never knew him to be anxious – not one second of anxiety in all the time I knew him. He was a lump who slept as much as he could get away with and never, ever was prone to worry or any other anxious thoughts. I never saw him experience stress like normal people do.
It doesn’t even matter anymore, but I have found myself wondering on a couple of occasions whether he’s ramping up his illnesses for attention and the continuing excuse not to do any meaningful work.
Thank you ((Truthspeak)). Yes, a soul-sucker and an energy parasite.
Funny you should say that because I once had a psychic tell me the same thing about him! But, I pity him cuz he is a soul-sucker. I feel sorry for him that he wound up with that karma.
Here’s the latest:
Just got off the phone with the “Black Hole Of Need”. He’s a cousin, but we were raised like siblings. I’ve been urging him for 2 yrs to go back into therapy.
Just finished a 2.5 hour telephone conversation with him re: all the problems in his life & his physical health. For the last 2 years, I’ve been telling him that his problems & stress are manifesting as physical symptoms of illness.
So after 2 hours of talking, he then mentions he just started seeing a therapist!!
I’m listening to his blah-blah-blah & 2 hours in, he then tells me he’s been seeing a T for the last month.
Why didn’t he tell me that in the beginning of the conversation!?!
I could have been spared 149 minutes of his complaints-problems!!!?!
So, I told him I was happy he went into therapy.
Here’s the kicker: Guess what? He told me that the T said that one of the biggest problems in his life is ME!
My response: “I’m sorry to hear that”.
I’m really proud of myself that I didn’t respond by telling him what an F’ing pain in the arse he is to me! I didn’t take the bait!!
Also, after 2 hours of me talking about how stress can cause & trigger physical illness, THEN he tells me that his wife has also been telling him THE SAME THING!!
Again, why didn’t he tell me earlier in the conversation that his wife has been saying the same thing ?
I spent 2.5 hours LISTENING to him repeat & repeat & repeat his complaints.
Do you know anyone like this??? Gd, give me strength!
DawnG,
I don’t mean to laugh at your pain, but I did chuckle at the following:
“(I feel so incredibly sorry for her but I’m happy that it’s not me).”
Girl, I know that feeling!!!!
“He was a lump who slept as much as he could get away with”
Yes, as much as they can get away with!
DawnG, I’m glad you’re OUT of that scene & no longer his nurse maid.
“Nurse Maid”: that is what these people want: Someone who is both their Nurse & their Maid & who works for FREE and FINANCIALLY supports them.
SOUL SUCKERS.
EMOTIONAL VAMPIRES.