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By | February 17, 2012 24 Comments

Man cons woman to adopt baby

A Pennsylvania woman met a guy online, fell for his stories, and got pregnant. She claims that he then conned her into giving him the child.

Read: Woman fights man she met online for baby, on Today.MSNBC.MSN.com.

Link supplied by a Lovefraud reader.


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Ox Drover

You know, that is a story and a half, but it doesn’t seem to me to take the WISDOM OF SOLOMON to realize that there was a CON involved in this one too…fighting over the baby!

Talk about planning….I wonder if the wife was in on it from the first, and my guess is that she was (but don’t know this of course) but she would have to know by now that the baby belonged to her husband and how it came to be “available” for her to “adopt” it, so she KNOWS ABOUT THE CON and she is still with the guy…trying to get the baby.

Wonder if she’d agree to cutting the baby in two and keeping half and giving half to the birth mother? I bet she would.

Now, though, what about the daddy’s “rights?” If the spurious adopting is nixed, what about his rights and his visitation rights and all that? Me thinks the birth mother’s life is screwed and her child’s as well if this man is allowed contact with the child and I am going to BET the “adoptive” mother loses, but he gets visitation RIGHTS and so on. What a night mare! The poor kid.

Ox Drover

ps How about a FRAUD prosecution for these people and put them in prison?

Joanie123

I don’t want to call this gal stupid maybe more naive.
I can remember when my incident took place with my spath I was a young naive girl of 24. A lot of folks told me I was stupid for taking the bait. And yes, like this gal, my spath pulled the wool over my eyes leading me to believe we had a future together.
As for the guys wife, like my ex’s long-term girlfriend she must be either an idiot: allowing him to go to social networking sites claiming to be single and picking up women to deceive, or else like Oxy says: she was in on the con from the beginning hoping to get a baby out of it.
I do believe the girl’s story though about the con job he did on her.
I can remember when I entered my spath’s house for the first time there was a picture of him and his arm around his long-term girl friend who he is still with today after conning count less women. He told me it was a picture of him and his sister. After that visit the picture disappeared. Whoops, forgot to get rid of the photo before visit of new victim.
And yes, my spath told me numerous lies about himself to impress me and build himself up.
Another story about the dangers of online dating and how you really have to be careful. I’m 30 years happily married now but if I ever entered the “meat market” (dating scene) again which I probably won’t I’d do a complete background check on any future suitor.
Just my thoughts.
Joanie123

skylar

Joanie,
I can’t call anyone stupid because of what I was conned into doing. When you don’t know what spaths are capable of you can’t imagine it. You just can’t.

Who does that? WHO!? Nobody does that. right?

*sigh*

Joanie123

I know Skylar you’re right. These spaths do a number on our psyche.
Every time I think about what my spath did to me the movie “Original Sin” comes to mind.
The villain or evil male nemesis is a clone of my ex-spath and the character played by Angelina Jolie reminds me of my ex-spath’s long-term girlfriend going along with his games and cons to fool innocent dupes.

jofary

The poor woman is clearly not very bright but that makes what he did even worse. He took advantage of someone who did not have the smarts to see through him.

I work with developmentally disabled people and am fiercely protective of them. They are so vulnerable, so incapable of defending themselves against manipulation and abuse. I’ve worked with kids who were in a special needs class but, because their IQ was slightly above that which mandates socialized care, once they turned eighteen they were on their own. These kids would no doubt have been called “stupid” in the world once they were on their own. Without support, there is no doubt they would have made many disastrous choices. But being “stupid” is not a crime.

Taking advantage of someone who is vulnerable, no matter what their vulnerability, should be, though.

Ox Drover

Where does it say this woman was mentally retarded or slow?

Not to “brag” but my IQ is in the top 2% and I was CONNED repeatedly by s-paths throughout my life inside and out of my family. I am NOT stupid, and neither is Donna or Dr. Leedom or the posters here…that’s one reason I like this site is that there are INTELLIGENT PEOPLE HERE who are “just like me” and they also were conned in some pretty OUTSTANDING CONS.

While this is a bit unusual in what he was conning her FOR, a child, not money…it still doesn’t mean she was stupid.

She may have been “stoooopid” (versus stupid) as we all were when we got conned, but she ain’t STUPID….just a woman who suspended logic for the fantasy of true love.

Joanie123

I want to add a lot of times when we’re in love we can’t see the forest for the trees. The person may be no good. We can’t see it but others around us who aren’t under their spell may and may even try to tell us.
A lot of these spath boys/ and girls seem to have some charismatic charm where they actually mesmerize you to carry out their will and those who have been in relationships like this know exactly what I’m talking about.
I think Oxy’s right when she says a lot of time we suspend logic for the fantasy of true love.
My spath conned me financially and married me to do it. Where was my logic at that time? Who does that? Not a normal man. A normal man would probably file bankruptcy to clear his debts before he conned a woman in this way.
These spath guys are very good at what they do and many women fall in their traps because they know how to work it.
He probably weighed his options.
Plan A was he would try his hardest to exploit this girl and make a baby for himself and his wife.
Plan B was if he couldn’t get away with it he still made an heir. Something he couldn’t do with his wife.
No doubt at some point down the road his wife will see the reason behind it and divorce him.
He may at some point get together again with his victim. We women can be stupid like that and give 2nd chances.
In any event I saw myself wearing her shoes many years ago albeit different circumstances.

Joanie123

Update on this case: I go on several boards besides this one and we were discussing this case in a live chat.
Later on someone anonymously emailed me through my other group and told me the reason why he conned her through online dating to have his baby was because he and his wife couldn’t adopt through proper channels.
Apparently according to the anonymous source he had a prior drug conviction and no adoption agency would handle them.
I don’t know who the messenger was or if this bears validity but whoever sent it had inside knowledge about the case.

skylar

Joanie,
thanks for the update. sheez! wouldn’t that couple have made nice parents! NOT.

Talk about entitled. This guy takes the cake.
He didn’t want money, he wanted someone’s baby.
sick, sick, sick.

Ox Drover

What lengths people will go to to accomplish a “purpose” is beyond me. It is almost as bad as the people who kidnap a preg woman and cut the baby out of her belly.

Ox Drover

A Kentucky woman has been jailed for life without parole for killing an expectant mother and ripping her unborn baby from her womb.

Kathy Coy, 34, was handed the sentence after admitting to the brutal murder of Jamie Stice, 21, on the grounds of mental illness in a plea deal which allowed her to avoid the death sentence.

Ms Stice’s son, Isaiah Allen Stice Reynolds, survived the horrific attack although he was born five weeks premature and lives with his father.

Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2108881/Murderous-baby-thieving-womb-ripper-Kathy-Coy-gets-life-prison.html#ixzz1ntyaOrPO

The Art on a Con will never go away. That is exactly why Love Fraud exists.

This will be the next blog:
http://shine.yahoo.com/parenting/teacher-leaves-wife-kids-high-school-student-225300504.html

Unbelieveable!! I hope this mother can get her 18 year old daughter back. This guy left a wife and 3 kids (one of them a 17 year old… can you imagine how she feels?)

Skylar, he didn’t want the money. He wanted the baby. All about control and possessions. He’d have a baby to brainwash, to teach it to adore him and feed his NPD. Very sick!

We must keep exposing and educating.

Ox Drover

Yea, Honest, I saw that article too….and the horrible part is that there isn’t anything the wife or the mother of the girl can do, he has HOODWINKED the girl into thinking she is his “princess” and she is not going to see the truth for quiet some time.

That is the thing that psychopaths do….they blind us to the truth, and separate us from our families and those who would save us or point out that they are not what they seem.

The girl doesn’t realize if he will cheat on the wife with her, he will CHEAT ON her as well with the next victim.

Yep,

Lovebomb
Isolate
Manipulate
Lie (morally corrupt)
He as a teacher had a large population of young, naive, vulnerable young ladies….. found his perfect target

I am gonna keep reading. I still need to be able to spot the sly ones more quickly.

callmeathena

That 18 year old girl is likely going to be on this site sooner or later…….and the wife who was dumped for an 18 year old is probably going to be here too.

Ugh.

I can’t believe how slimed I feel. My spath really honestly slimed me.

Ox Drover

Athena, that feeling of being slimed is actually a good thing, it keeps us from being reeled back in AGAIN and AGAIN…it is a protective feeling, so when you think about him, think SLIME and YUK!!!!!

callmeathena

Ox

Yes, I believe what you are saying is true. Actually, I suppose this whole anger/grieving process is good. In the end we will be better off for the experience, I hope.

I do honestly think that this experience has altered my body chemistry. I feel anxious, and some level of addiction to the roller coaster ride he used to provide. I also feel physically repulsed by his lies. Maybe all rolled together its some form of PTSD. But I do know I didn’t feel the same way before I met my spath. I was more balanced and calm.

The strange ways the spaths affect us…..

Athena

callmeathena

Vidya

I wish I had the thread to your anger posy earlier this week. You are sssooo me. And then I find myself pitying the f*cker. Unbelievable.

Hugs.

Athena

Sparklehorse

Athena,

I just coming out of an anxiety phase (I hope). I had some anxiety around work issues earlier in the week which was more intense than my “regular” work anxiety but I was able to get through it fairly quickly.

I’ve found exercise really helps with managing my anxiety level but meditation has really helped me reverse the trend where I felt so emotionally depleted by my spath experience. I have dabbled in meditation before but I think one difference now is that I found a group.

There are many paths to the same temple but as with this wonderful site, there is power in exposing yourself to positive energy from a group.

Best wishes,
Sparklehorse

P.S. I love your screen name. My college crest is includes Minerva and ever since I have felt a strong affinity to this goddess in her Greek or Roman form!

skylar

A good friend turned me on to Seth Godin’s blog.
Each day, he posts a short, insightful blog. I thought this blog was a really good one and I’d like to share it.

Ashamed to not know

Society changes when we change what we’re embarrassed about.

In just fifty years, we’ve made it shameful to be publicly racist.

In just ten years, someone who professes to not know how to use the internet is seen as a fool.

The question, then, is how long before we will be ashamed at being uninformed, at spouting pseudoscience, at believing thin propaganda? How long before it’s unacceptable to take something at face value? How long before you can do your job without understanding the state of the art?

Does access to information change the expectation that if you can know, you will know?

We can argue that this will never happen, that it’s human nature to be easily led in the wrong direction and to be willfully ignorant. The thing is, there are lots of things that used to be human nature, but due to culture and technology, no longer are.

Ox Drover

Sky, what’s the link to this guy’s blogs?

KatyDid

Oxy
I LOVE http://www.SethGodin.com He is a marketing guru who encourages entrepreneurs to think from different perspectives. Currently he is encouraging biz to give something away. The more you give away, the more that is returned to you. Being miserly about your services does not make you valued by your customers, it makes you less appealing. In this day of being nickled and dimed by airlines, phone companies, grocery stores, etc., giving something of value that others don’t have to pay for makes your business stand out. Have a restaurant? Share a recipe. OR tell people something unusual and for a foodie wannabee, like how to cut a mango. I have been following this idea for years in my biz, sharing my knowledge so that my clients will come to me for more, b/c I have more to share. It also encourages GROWTH, b/c once we “process” what we have given away, it’s not GONE, it’s at the next level! That’s the Steve Jobs Apple growth model. Challenge yourself to innovate. Seth Godin inspires GREAT ideas.

Ox Drover

I’ll look it up and see. I have always had the idea in business that the customer MUST BE HAPPY…and Ii have always tried to make my customers feel that they “got a good deal” and that is why I had such a big repeat business in my grass fed meat sales through the years. Even though I increased the size of my herd I couldn’t keep up with the demand for my meat.

Even now when I only have a few old pet cows to produce meat for us and our friends, and haven’t actually sold meat in over 6 years, I still get from one to three or four “word of mouth” requests for meat.

Unfortunately, the only person around here who raises grass fed beef and other meat is a what I think is very high in P traits and I will not recommend him to anyone just “on principle.”

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