A guy playing the drums in a Johannesburg townhouse complex drew complaints within minutes. The blood-curdling screams of domestic violence drew no reaction.
This was all shockingly documented in an online video released by a South African advocacy group, People Opposing Women Abuse (POWA).
Read Video test of domestic abuse awareness in South Africa gets more than 500,000 hits in DailyMail.co.uk.
Link supplied by a Lovefraud reader.
I agree, AFTER he has paid you back all he owes you, then you can listen to him…..so do not hold your breath! He is just trying to con you again,
FOOD ME ONCE, SHAME ON YOU, FOOL ME TWICE, SHAME ON ME!!!
If you take him back, you have been warned and are stepping in as a VOLUNTEER VICTIM. We didn’t warn you, HE did, by how he treated you the first time. ACTIONS not words.
OMG, thank you so much – reality check reality check.
I am back on earth now. All of you are right. He did not offer to make amends about money or the motorcycle.
I am not going to be a “volunteer victim” – and I love my daughter and she and I are both happy that I dont have him in my life. 1.5 years – No Contact! I am continuing on. I appreciate you all so so so much.
He is not going to pay me back anything – i know that just like i know how he treated me in the past. I am good now. i thank you so very much.
Dear hedidn’tbreakme,
GOOD FOR YOU!!!! TOWANDA!!!!
Every time you think about anything “nice” about him, go into your kitchen, get out your biggest skillet and BOINK yourself on the head as hard as you can and say to yourself “Ox Drover just reminded me what an assface he is” LOL
Seriously, you would only be more meat for his grinder, and I think he is out of “supply” is why he came back into your life. They frequently will go back through their “little black book” of phone numbers when they are out of money, aren’t getting laid, are being found out as a cheat, don’t have a place to sleep etc. and they think “well maybe I can hook back up with X” They start in on the sweet nothings and hope we have forgotten the REALITY of what they DID and will listen to what they SAY.
Glad you are back to sanity! It is easy enough to listen to their spin and their lies…but remember HE IS THE LIE. (((hugs)))) and God bless!
thanks Ox Drover: You hit the nail on the head – he is out of his supply – and the little black book is what he is working on. I am so glad that you are here to help me knock sense back into my head….the skillet worked. I am FINE!
I didnt work this hard to get back into his web of deceit. i will not text, email or any communication with him! NC is in full effect!
Dear hedidn’tbreakme,
Sugar the top of my head is FLAT from the BOINKS I’ve had to deliver to myself! It does work, if I keep hitting my head hard enough and often enough! LOL
There is some stupid ad on TV that I hate, haven’t seen it lately though, where the guy goes “la, la, la, can’t hear you!” But that is the thing with the psychopaths or any dysfunctional abusers out to use us, and that is we cannot LISTEN to their lies, if we listen, they are like the “Siren’s song” and lure us into their webs.
NC protects us.
hedidntbreakme…….well done you.
It’s 4am and here I am worrying about you and how vulnerable you are just now. So I fired up the computer to see what everyone thought of your situation.
So pleased you had the foresight to ask your REAL FRIENDS on here. They give good advice.
The crowd on here do not ask us for money, steal from us, punch us in the face, turn us into gibbering wrecks or fill us with fear. They help us, teach us, feel our pain…….and what is their charge for this service? Nil. So yes these (not spath) are our real friends who can be relied upon.
BOINKS all round. Ouch!!
hedidntbreakme:
I second all of the above and would like to add something of my own that I find myself writing here over and over and over again (to remind myself as much as anyone else here) –
EVERYTHING they do, say or think is for a reason; EVERYTHING is a part of their Masterplan. They do NOTHING for any of the “normal” reasons that we might do the same thing.
Imagine he moves on.
Somewhere down the track, he cons someone else (this is a given) and they become suspicious.
They back-track.
They look you up and ask your opinion and for your advice. Which position would you rather be in now?
The one where you tell them to run like hell because no good will come of it and their instincts are spot on? (So – you help them to save themselves, the way that you wish someone could have helped you when it was your turn)
Or the one where you say, “Yeah, well, he did used to be a bit irresponsible and we did have a falling out but then he did come round and apologise and we still keep in touch and basically I think he’s an okay kind of guy now…” (So – you help them to stay stuck where you used to be and they get even more hurt)
Well???? (You don’t have to answer – I know that you already know)
So agree with other posters – don’t walk back down that road of taking him back. I did it and lost another year of my life in the worst stress and no it couldn;t be made amicable. We couldn;t remain friends. No contact no contact no contact.
You did the right thing in waking up from his spell – they’re so alluring – like the snake in the garden of Eden.
only WITHOUT any “apples”….
Yes, I thank you all – in just “one” visit with him, i felt my self-esteem being tested (he made a comment that i was REAL skinny and he knows how i feel about that, he always liked me with a lil weight on in the right places). i felt like i was in competition mode again (trying to be perfect like the model women he is so interested in). I was walking around asking people do i look skinny, starting to overeat – WDF! “one visit!”
The other thing is – I asked him at the visit if he was a Sociopath – he said, “put your hands in my hands, i feel & I hurt too”- he said “do u feel that” the warmth of his hand – my dumb @.......@@....... at the time was feeling like, he is “normal.”
I didnt like the feeling at all and its ALL SO FAMILIAR. Not going back, Today is a good day! Ox Drover, Aussiegirl, candy, pollyannanomore! You dont know how much your comments helped…i think, NO, I WAS falling for the charm and appologies….plain n simple “Supply” “Supply” “Supply” right now he is sitting back – thinking, I got that sucker again, but little does he know – he will NOT HEAR FROM ME AGAIN!