Many people commenting on this blog have expressed the hope that sociopaths/psychopaths will pay in this lifetime for their evil deeds. Well, I am writing to tell you that if this is your wish, statistics are in your favor. You likely just need to wait it out because psychopathy is associated with life failure, as I will explain.
In a recent study, Psychopathic personality traits and life-success, Dr. Simone Ullrich and colleagues examined relationship success and life success in more than 300 men, they have followed for many years, these men are now 48 years old. In their study, psychopathy was not associated with success in any of life’s domains. When they examined symptoms of psychopathy the interpersonal domain (being charming and manipulative) was not related to ”˜”˜status and wealth” or ”˜”˜successful intimate relationships”. Impulsiveness and antisocial behavior reduced ”˜”˜status and wealth.” The authors state “ It is concluded that psychopathic traits do not contribute to a successful life and that the findings cast doubt on the existence of the successful psychopath.”
You may be asking, What about all the “successful psychopaths” we hear about? First of all, I believe that these are a very tiny minority. Remember that the disorder sociopathy or psychopathy is a group of impairments that I relate to an inability to love, poor impulse control and deficient moral reasoning. Confusion arises because some narcissistic individuals have impaired ability to love accompanied by grandiosity, but their impulse control and moral reasoning are not as impaired. These individuals may achieve some life success (Journal of Personality Disorders, Vol 21(6), Dec 2007. pp. 657-663). So if a person is unable to love and grandiose but not excessively impulsive or immoral, that individual may achieve some career success. But still an inability to love prevents any real relationship success.
So now you can move on. Fate and Karma will get that psychopath/sociopath. You can go about your life working as I do, on trying to love more and live better.
Elizabeth Conley
Your first ending is better. Include any dates you’ve got and copies of the statements you made, if you have copies.
Make sure it’s easy for investigators to reach you.
Ox Drover
STar,
I’m not sure how to handle the “adultry” charge, whether to mention it or not, or to say “he dated me, while married and telling me was separated and divorcing his wife” or not, because I don’t want you to come across loike the “scorned woman”
I think Matt is the one to help you phrase it, or Pearl, she’s an attorney too. I think there needs to be some professional advice here in helping you. Over all, the letter isn’t bad, it is just the details that I think need to be ironed out so you don’t come off looking like the “woman scorned”—just the woman duped by both army and the Lt. Surely this is “behavior unbecoming for an officer” and attempted FRAUD so he should not be kept in the army but given a DISHONORABLE discharge in my book. If not a prison term.
BOINK! That’s the sound of my iron skillet hitting the creep on the head! Oh, that felt good (to me!) BOINK again! LOL
Stargazer
Thanks. So you don’t think I should make an emotional appeal, as Oxy says? I hope I have saved the statements.
Elizabeth Conley
And don’t use the words “outraged” or “disrespected”. Disrespected became a word only recently. Both terms are “emotional” and may be construed as your seeking revenge against the army or the S/P.
Stargazer
Well, the statement I gave definitely details our adulterous relationship, including times and dates. I do not have the times and dates of my conversations with the army. In fact, I have deleted all of their emails in a fit of rage.
Stargazer
Okay, I’ll take those emotionally charged words out. I hope Matt drops by to comment too. I think I will make the changes you’ve suggested and wait for Matt. At that point, I want to send right away to get it off my plate. I don’t care if it’s perfect.
Thank you all for your support in this difficult time.
Matt
Stargazer:
Speaking as a lawyer, I would go with your original ending. Also, I would suggest being as date specific as you can and provide any supporting documentation in your possession.
For example:
“I am providing you with copies of the following documents which were provided to the investigating officers (NAMES) in connections with their investigation:
1. Exhibit A- email dated …
2. Exhibit B- letter dated…”
If you have copies of the statements you gave the investigators I would add a paragraph as follows:
I would also state that “I met with th invesgtigators (NAMES) on X date. I have attached copies of my deposition(s) as Exhibit (C, D, etc) hereto.”
Looks to me like you’re on the right track.
Stargazer
Matt et al. Seriously, I don’t have all the emails–I just deleted them!!!! I also do not recall the dates of the visits and phone calls. Can I still send the letter?
Matt
Stargazer:
One more thought:
I would put a caption in bold and underlined just above the “Dear Congressman X” which reads “Re: Army Fraud Investigation — Failure to Notify Witness”. Or something to that effect.
Stargazer
I do have a copy of the statements, but they detail the adulterous relationship with I didn’t mention in the letter. Do you still think I should include them?