A 24-year-old guy described himself in an Internet forum: He doesn’t feel emotion, is an excellent liar, becomes bored quickly, and experiences an adrenalin rush when deceiving or angering someone else. He asks, is he a sociopath?
I’d answer yes. The post is an interesting insight into how a disordered young man perceives himself and others.
Read Self-diagnosing sociopathy on the Dr. Robert forum.
behind_blue_eyes
Louise;
Also, you are 100% correct that nothing you say seems to both them.
After he dumped me, by email of course, knowing I was bed ridden with Shingles and facing the strong possibility of my being HIV+, I called him.
First, I got not what I would call Gaslighting, more like blame shifting, back to an earlier date when he told me he “agreed there was a connection but he was not sure what it was…”
Naturally, he forgot about all the things he said and did after that.
Anyway, after I got off the phone with him, he had to “run,” I thought about things and sent him a nice email.
The next day, I was angry let him and let him know that. He did not respond. Feeling guilty about calling him a shit, a couple days later I sent him a very, very nice and apologetic email. I even invited him to a big holiday party at my place, if he happened to be around…
His response to me was like nothing happened between us. Very much, “I had a nice little trip to Spain for a couple of days to get away…”
He would probably laugh at the end of Old Yeller…
Louise
BBE:
I am sure your X spath probably did have someone lined up..don’t they all??? It drives me nuts. There is always someone on the line; always someone better so it seems. Or so they think.
In my experience, they will never respond when you are angry. Mine was avoidant when that happened. They would rather just ignore it and hope you get over it. They don’t want to deal with anything.
behind_blue_eyes
Louise;
“Better” may not be the correct choice of words. I would say “newer.”
One of my x-spath’s FB “friends” is an early 20s, Council Estate sired and bound mess who on gay dating sites openly advertises for crystal meth fueled bareback sex encounters.
Why would a late 30s guy “friend” somebody like that?
Louise
BBE:
You are right…newer is a much better word.
Wow, that “friend” of his does sound like a dreadful mess. He is playing fire with his life that’s for sure.
behind_blue_eyes
Yes. This kid puts links to the gay site profiles right on Facebook.
This shows either incredibly poor judgement by my x-spath or that is the type of person he wants for a friend.
But then again, the x-spath uses the same profile names for both dating sites and porn sites, so maybe he just does not care, or really is “clueless.”
one/joy_step_at_a_time
my n ex just called. after 2 years nc, and 2.5 since I contacted her. didn’t recognize the number. Almost didn’t answer it, but i get lots of business calls from numbers i don’t recognize.
so…man, that came out of left field. there was bad reception, and i said hello twice, and she say’s, ‘it’s n ex’. I stopped to consider what i wanted to say, thinking, ‘Do i just hang up?’. I thought about it for several seconds. long time on a phone. I decided on, ‘sorry, no can do’, and hung up.
she’s not evil. just really really bad and destructive, and i don’t want to talk to her ever again. (evil gets a hang up, no ‘sorry’!)
wow. didn’t expect that – whoa. The sound of her voice has IMMEDIATELY taken me back to the good of her. and really, i am sorry that she is such an effing mess that i can’t have her in my life. i truly am disappointed. truly and deeply. MAN, i had a thing for that girl, and such deep hopes.
i suspect she is close by – the area code suggested that. she lives in a different place than i do, but it’s a long weekend here and she was probably passing by. and i wish i hadn’t figured that much out that quickly.
edited to add: only takes 2 seconds to add a number to call block!
behind_blue_eyes
One;
I feel for you and share the opinion that my x-spath was not evil, rather “toxic” or destructive as you put it. I suspect I would be taken back to “good” by the sound of my x-spath’s voice as well.
My mind says you did the right by hanging up. That must have been difficult for you and I hope you are emotionally in a good place.
Get out, be with friends and don’t do anything self-destructive.
Louise
one/joy:
Wow, that would have freaked me out especially after two years!! You really did the right thing, but it must have been REALLY hard. I know it would have been for me. Extremely hard. I hope you are OK.
Confirms again that they always come back.
You are strong…be good to yourself today!
ElizabethBennett
onestep-I’m really sorry that happened. It really sucks. Just remember where she put you when you start thinking of the good. There isn’t good anywhere in her and I can’t figure what she thinks she would accomplish by contacting you all this time. Take care of yourself today.
one/joy_step_at_a_time
thanks all! have a minute before my meeting starts.
it wasn’t hard to do, but i am having some aftermath right now. kinda want to just be quiet and sad.
BBE – haha – i have to go to a funeral after my meeting.
Louise – thanks for the reminder. will work on that today.
Erin – i really do think there is good in her – she isn’t a spath. but, i am in no danger by being reminded of the good. none whatsoever, ’cause her ‘bad’ is burned deep within me. it actually helps me – as it allows me to touch some of my walled off sadness. and that is always healing.